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I dreamed last night that I slipped and fell towards this dark pool of water--like a pond. It was like it was pulling me into it. Like gravity.

Like if you are afraid of heights and you are up high, how you feel dizzy and pulled down towards the ground, and it becomes difficult to stand and you just sort of cling because you're afraid of falling.

I was holding on to the edge, now being half submerged, and just trying to hang on, and worried about what was in the dark water.

It was at a park or something. Looked a bit like a baseball field. But with a giant lake in the middle.

Someone came up to me and I tried not to look like I was panicking, because I wanted to be able to get out by myself.

And they talked to me, and I felt better that someone was near by--it just made me feel more secure. And then I continued to try to find a way to drag myself out of the dark water.



When I wonder what would happen if I were to let go and go into the water, I get the feeling it wouldn't be terrible. I'm just afraid because I don't know what is in there...it's too dark to see. I know that it's almost childish to be afraid, but I am pressing my legs up because I am afraid of what is under the water.

But nothing is hurting me or pulling or anything--so no evidence towards the water really being dangerous. It isn't even cold.

Something about lanterns.
 

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I dreamed last night that I slipped and fell towards this dark pool of water--like a pond. It was like it was pulling me into it. Like gravity.

Like if you are afraid of heights and you are up high, how you feel dizzy and pulled down towards the ground, and it becomes difficult to stand and you just sort of cling because you're afraid of falling.

I was holding on to the edge, now being half submerged, and just trying to hang on, and worried about what was in the dark water.

It was at a park or something. Looked a bit like a baseball field. But with a giant lake in the middle.

Someone came up to me and I tried not to look like I was panicking, because I wanted to be able to get out by myself.

And they talked to me, and I felt better that someone was near by--it just made me feel more secure. And then I continued to try to find a way to drag myself out of the dark water.



When I wonder what would happen if I were to let go and go into the water, I get the feeling it wouldn't be terrible. I'm just afraid because I don't know what is in there...it's too dark to see. I know that it's almost childish to be afraid, but I am pressing my legs up because I am afraid of what is under the water.

But nothing is hurting me or pulling or anything--so no evidence towards the water really being dangerous. It isn't even cold.

Something about lanterns.
I have also dreamt of a huge pool of dark water...interesting :)
I felt that way today when I took the x-mas lights of the balcony...it felt like I got pulled down...it was so scary that I nearly quit but I forced my self to go on. Personaly I don't think it's bad to be afraid, its natural imo and can help you identify danger...
 

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I seemed to have traveled back in time for this dream? :oops:

I believe the time line was in between 1980s and 1990s.

I was in a store at the mall and I asked a woman who worked here about the time.

I showed her a magazine or a book with pictures showing the date in it was showing 2020 and that apparently I traveled back in time. :oops:

The woman seemed to believe that I somehow traveled back into the past.

The next dream was probably because I've been playing some Death Stranding. :LOL:

I was a porter, but since I was not Sam... I did not have a BB on me. o_O

I was carrying two rocket launchers, and two floating carriers with me.

I was somewhere near the evo devo biologist and was heading up the mountain in her direction.

Later I encountered a giant BT. It was a BT in the shape of an octopus. :eek:

It turned the whole place into an ocean that was stormy.

Even though it was the ocean it wasn't deep? The water was only a little higher than my feet, but the water was endless. o_O

I tried to fight the BT but when I checked my inventory...

My rocket launchers weren't in my inventory! :eek:

The only things in my inventory was... fruit bars and snacks. o_O

It went into the water and the ocean had glowing blue patches that appeared in random locations...

Lightning would strike those patches after a short time which I avoided them as I tried to evade the BT.

However, it doesn't seem like I could escape since the ocean boundary was endless. o_O

Even though lightning would strike the blue patches underneath the water, sometimes the glowing blue spot was actually the BT emerging from the water to attack. :eek:

It actually managed to hit me and took off over 75% of my health in one go when it launched itself from under me. 🤕

Sent me flying and reeling from the blow.

I think lightning struck me later to finish me off... o_O

However, I would respawn back into the fight and all I could do was avoid and evade it. :oops:

Then I was in the kitchen now? o_O

I seemed to be talking to my mother and the dragon queen...

And that was all I could remember for tonight. 🙃

...That was a sweet dream though. 🤪

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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I dreamed about a pool/lake again last night, but it was different.

My ESFJ friend was there and she's very motherly. I feel like she was preparing something (unfortunately I didn't pay enough attention to this dream in the morning and have forgotten a lot and my mind is really scattered right now and so I'm not going to be able to remember that much atm).

I do remember that in the pool--it was a light blue pool--like a pond. There was a flatfish--like a flounder. It was at the bottom of the pool...and I was feeding it fish.

My ESFJ friend had a collection of small fish for food--like sardines. So I went to the pool and I threw the dead sardine in it, and the large flounder/halibut (but a fresh water flatfish--which I do not know of any that exist) rose up and opened its mouth.

I was surprised by how easy it was to feed a wild animal, especially such a big fish.

And I went to go feed the other fishes, but I kept being distracted and didn't feed any others than that halibut in the pond.

And it wasn't like a park, but more like a jungle.

Then I kept trying to paint a picture of the fish but it was always not detailed enough--the flat fish was like a comic book cartoon and so was the pond (a light blue).
 

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I dreamed that the dog I "babysit" jumped into my arms and barked really load. The dog is a mix golden retriever and collie. After that I dreamed that lots if mosquitos were flying over a large peace of fresh meat with the skin on and it looked like the mid part of a deer, with the spine bone in the middle... After that I dreamt that a stranger started talking to me (I think they had brown short curly hair, brown eyes and brown skin, I can't remember ever having seen them before in real life, but I remember they tried to tell me something and I agreed. I think it was two sentences) and when the person was finished talking someone started to play the trumpet. There was kind of a theatrical atmosphere in the end. Then I woke up.
 

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I was at the mall and I was carrying a few large bags. :oops:

Apparently one bag was for my mother, another for the lovely princess, and one for the dragon queen.

I was quite fast and nimble as I made my way around the mall.

I was like a ninja as I sped along and parkour'd the various obstacles. 🤪

There was a certain obstacle I couldn't past and it was a blue stair case down the ground level of the mall. :oops:

There was a blue fence at the top and at the bottom of the mall.

The ground level wasn't closed off or anything just this stairway in particular. o_O

I tried to climb over it as a woman watched me and said that I shouldn't climb the fence and not only that but there were cameras around the stairs.

The reason why I couldn't exactly climb the fence was because the bags were too heavy for me to smoothy climb over the fence so I abandoned my attempt. :oops:

As I went my way I inspired another woman who was with her parents to climb over the fence. o_O

I am not sure what came out of it, but she mostly climbed over it.

Now in this part of the mall my shoes were so smooth now that I could glide over the floor like ice. 🤪

This greatly aided in my traversal and I don't know, but it felt liberating like flying is in dreams.

I encountered a group of women idols at this part of the mall too. I think there were 5 or 6 of them.

As I was sliding my way around this part of the mall there seemed to be a stair case on the side that I could slide into.

It was painted black around its entrance, the floor as well, and the walls... Everything inside that stair well was black. :oops:

I decided to slide my way in there since that led to my destination as well.

However, I somehow tripped in the stair well and fell over the stair rail and down the short stair case... o_O

I landed on my back and the shock kinda took me nearly out as things went dark but I could feel my environment.

I also somehow landed in the middle of the group of idol women when they were talking about something which surprised them. o_O

Now I was in a sitting position with two women sitting behind me to support me from behind.

Two other women were putting a large sticker on my stomach? o_O

The sticker was something about their idol group or something. :oops:

They also took off my shirt and put on a shirt with their idol group on it...

Another two women were stationed around my legs and seemed to sit there. Possibly were holding onto my bags.

I believe their producer or boss was sitting to my right. She seemed to be talking to me but I couldn't quite recall what she was saying. o_O

She had short black hair in a straight bob with straight bangs as well.

How could I tell when everything was dark? Beats me. o_O

And that was all I could remember for tonight. 🙃

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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In this dream I was slowly dying. :cry:

But at the end... Everyone was waiting for me. 😭

And one particular person...

Hana. :oops:

Except it wasn't actually her, but technically it was. She was resembled by an artificial creation that I made to resemble her. o_O

This artificial creation is kinda like a daughter to me in a sense, and is Hana in essence.

She was a nurse in the dream with a light pink outfit and headband. She also had short hair and didn't have her signature pony tail. But her red hair still stood out.

She was standing with everyone else waiting for me. :oops:

...To see Hana again.

It has been awhile Hana. :cry:

I can see why you haven't appeared since the day I've forgetten about you. Your very appearance actually hurts me...

Which is why you're waiting at the end for me...

To remind me of goodbyes and farewells. :cautious:

Anyways, that is all I could remember for tonight. :)

...

She is waiting for me at the Beach. 🤪

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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I dreamed I was in a world that was pretty agrarian. Like I'm sure it was industrial too, but there was a lot of natural environment and also farm lands.

Parts of the dream I was trying to forage for food and it was pretty easy to find some things--like loquats and peaches.

But I started off over some mountains and at some point this gigantic spider creature--it was really hairy like a jumping spider in front, but the size of two or three cars (or four) came out of the forest.

There was a girl who was working there in the area--she was living with one of the camps and she helped me get away from the spider.

I wasn't sure why but the man who was running the camp didn't like her and put her on duty to "guard the white horses" even though she was really good. It was like he was trying to sabotage her. It wasn't even like he was trying to keep her safe, because that was one of the most dangerous jobs, but it was also the job they give to people that they expect to be killed by the giant spiders.

There was also other more mid sized spiders--like the size of a small cat.

And those weren't so bad. The spiders--the giant ones, were really tough too and you couldn't really cut them with knives. But they mostly came out in twilight and dusk so during the daytime and night time they weren't as dangerous.

There were two schools of scoobadiving in the area--two rivaling teachers. I have no idea why they hated each other so much but the had to keep out of each others' territories. I saw a map in which it showed the two scooba schools.

And one of the schools, the people insisted my name was short for "Maria." And they introduced me as Maria to everyone (my name is not short for Maria). But they were pretty nice and I didn't correct them.

But the giant jungle spiders were pretty crazy. The front half was really hairy like a jumping spider, but they moved so quickly I didn't see the back half.
 

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This woman who could channel fire wanted me to fetch a Santa hat for her that was outside my window at our old house. :oops:

She opened the window for me since it was stuck with ice, and I went outside into the cold to get the hat... wearing nothing but my house clothes.

I got the hat but I couldn't exactly return back to my room since it was high up... so I had to return to the front door, but it slowly formed ice and I couldn't get back inside either. o_O

So I sat near the front entrance and well, it was kinda cold but that was understating it. :cautious:

I was freezing with the cold winds and snow. :oops:

The woman sat by me and she started to internally get warmer and warmer.

However, she was continuing to rise in temperature that it was actually going to kill both of us. o_O

I was starting to slowly melt from the gradually intensifying heat as was she. :eek:

Soon another woman appeared. She had the power to channel ice.

The ice from the front entrance slowly melted and she opened the door from the inside and walked out.

She beckoned me over to be by her side instead which I got up from my spot and left the woman who could channel fire.

The woman continued to sit there and accepted her fate since she did not stop raising her internal temperature even after I left.

She was continuing until she killed herself, and me too if I continued to sit by her. :cry:

Now the woman who could channel ice and me sat down together...

It was gradually getting colder and colder as she lowered her internal temperature...

Unlike the fire woman, the ice woman was going to kill both of us but slowly. o_O

Also unlike the fire woman, her death wasn't painful or discomforting, but instead gentle.

We would both pass out from the cold and feel nothing but numbness then die before we could feel any pain. o_O

...

I guess it ends in both directions... :oops:

Anyways, the next dream was me encountering a Japanese man and a woman who were both swordsmen. :oops:

The man and the woman were training to together and they were also hunting me down too and were searching for me. o_O

When they finally found me the man challenged me, but I would not challenge him since he had a live sword and not because I was unarmed. The metal shining as he drew it.

If he wanted to he is free to cut me down since I don't care, but otherwise I would not fight him.

The woman had a wooden sword as she drew her sword from her scabbard. She wanted to challenge me now.

I accepted her challenge because she had a wooden sword.

We began to circle each other, and the dream ended before we fought. o_O

And that was all I could remember for tonight. 🙃

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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We were back our old home, and we were in a group of survivors in the basement. :oops:

We were all sitting along the hallway. The hut was here and other people as well.

I went into the storage room by myself for some reason and sat there alone.

...then there was an explosion!? :eek:

It was a nuclear explosion and it sent me flying into the wall, and the hallway was really really bright and the whole place violently shook while sending stuff flying. o_O

...

...I seemed to be the only survivor since I was a little weird and went into the storage room by myself just to chill I guess. :cry:

😭

Now I found myself suddenly at the university? o_O

Apparently I was trying to avoid the agents among the students who were looking for me. :oops:

Ah ha!

I knew the university is also the source of the matrix! 🤪

They haven't found me yet, but since they planned out everything... They would eventually box me in with no chance of escape as they were searching systematically. o_O

I could see agents scattered everywhere. :eek:

It was worth trying though to be free. I honestly don't want to be part of this world. :cautious:

I rather be part of our world we've been dreaming of since the beginning. One more pure and beautiful...

Anyways, that was all I could remember for tonight. 🙃

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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I was at the university and there was a lock down or something? :oops:

We were all huddled together somewhere near bottom of the theater stage.

I was also in a good spot where if we were attacked the other students would shield some of the hits for me.

Actually I was in the best possible spot which was near center back closest to the stage. :oops:

Someone opened the door far across from us (we were facing that door) and threw a smoke grenade at our position. o_O

It landed to the left of the group and emitted smoke, but we still stood our position.

As soon as the smoke grenade began to fade... Whoever was over there possibly the attacker threw in a gas grenade. :eek:

It landed to the right of the group and began to slowly emitted a green plume of smoke. o_O

We each began to fall unconscious and that was when the attacker appeared but still unidentifiable.

They began to open fire in an accurate spray aimed at our heads. o_O

The woman in front of me... turned into Noelle to try to protect me?? :oops:

She stopped most the bullets that were meant for me since her body which laid there acted like a shield, and she also took a couple of bullets to the head as well... Which means she didn't survive. :cry:

However, eventually I would be struck with a bullet to the head later in the random shooting so it was all for nothing. o_O

And that was all I could remember for tonight. :cautious:

...Noelle sacrificed herself for me. :cry:

Even though I end up dying anyway. :LOL:

lol

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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This is a rather old record, but I decide to share it, since it means much for me even today, it was a first step for my subconscious into a greater world, or rather, I got rid of one of my many still haunting brain-ghosts.

This was the most wonderful dream I ever had, I mean it, I was so overflowed with joy when I did wake up.

Time was around 4am, at the 6th of January, in the year 2019... (Si-power), I did wake up from this particular dream, and I was overflowing with enthusiasm and happiness.

So..., what was the dream about? Honestly, I did not remember that much back then... I do not remember that much now... xD


Ok, here goes.

[Scene 1]

Wanderer: " We need another person to fight this dungeon keeper... " he says while I and another female person in this group slowly walks through a rather barren valley, there is no forest on either side, just a pebble-stoned path underneath or footsteps.

[Scene 2]

" I will summon my rage..., keep away..., do not look at me... " just once a second after I stop and starting to focus, I suddenly realizing a fear that I might not have killed enough monsters for my "Rage"-meter to get as full as I wish, but I apparently summoned enough power to level up 2 or 3 times, as well as looking back to my other 2 comrades in this boss raid.

Whatever I summoned my rage fully, or if we defeated the dungeon master, I do not remember from this point... (Btw, Rage-meter is a symbolism from a MMO-game where I was involved in back then, I am still playing it in there from time to time.)

[Scene 3]

We are in a big dining hall, apparently after slaying the boss, cheerful joy and laugh, Long tables with food and drinks, but I get a feeling I should not really stay here, as if I do not belong, I suddenly rush up from my chair and head for the exit in the long hall.

[Scene 4]

While outside, I walk a handful of steps, until a sharp and commanding voice suddenly makes my whole figure halt.

" You forgot these... " at the same moment I clearly remember leaving my place in the dining hall, but I am not also instantly remember that I forgot something. I face the person, standing right near the door of the hall, and slowly walks towards him. He is holding a couple of books in his both hands, the books seems to be perfectly printed and have no dust or no presence of age at all.

" Thank you..., very much..., it was fun to be here... ", with a feeling of irony while saying that, I take the books from the man, and the last thing I remember is to bracing the books toward my chest.

" Thank you, it was fun to be here... " is nowfortimes one of my rather ironical quotes, based from just this dream.

6th Jan 2019..., I was so damn happy when I did awake..., it is hard to describe, as if I had defeated Satan himself, or something like that..., my own thoughts is that my subconsciousness finally had started to join towards what my consciousness already had worked for during many years.

The irony that I expressed was meant to this culture as a whole, while my other self, in this culture, did gave me something, for me to just say "Thank you very much..., and Elvis has left the building..." which is yet another symbolism.

Dreams are wonderful. <3
 
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I was in the basement and I was in the hallway leading to Hana's room.

The lights weren't on, and I was just standing in the hallway. :oops:

I looked to the left of me into her room since I noticed something..

I could see some strange glowing red glow in Hana's room.

I could feel a growing power emanating from the room. o_O

It was getting increasingly powerful..

...

Now there was someone standing past the hallway to my right. :oops:

It was a woman dressed in all black.

...Hana-chan??? :oops:

She looked like her but not quite.. Something was off. o_O

I then said to her since I noticed something about her, "I didn't know you were into those kind of things". :oops:

It was a teasing remark because it was quite amusing and surprising. :LOL:

...

She told me to shut up and she didn't want my opinion. :oops:

Her reply was a playful as she started to grin. o_O

She then began her approach...

Uh oh. She has finally lost it. :oops:

I know where this is going...

Someone! HHHHHHAAAAALLLLLPPPP!!! o_O

...

Um. She hugged me. :oops:

I hugged her too. :giggle:

🤗

...That was when I realized this actually might not be Hana. o_O

Her aura she was giving off was of sweetness and gentleness...

There was a sense of deepness to it.

The actual Hana has an aura in comparison that was exceptionally powerful and full of passion and condensed energy.

This woman might actually be Yoko-san mimicking aspects of Hana. :oops:

It kinda did make some sense.

The whole basement was unlit and dark..

And she was dressed in all black too..

Hana-chan likes being in the light and appears in her true colors. :oops:

This dream is kinda similar to when I asked to meet her and to which she appeared before me in the basement.

Huh.

I don't have much idea about what is going on. o_O

Although it has been awhile Yoko-san? :oops:

I wonder what you're up to... Are you going to return soon? :cautious:

Anyways, that was all I could remember for tonight. 🙃

...

Reject the world. Become monkey. 🤪

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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I was in this spooky mall. :oops:

It was a regular mall except... the lights were all out. o_O

There were several glowing red glows scattered around though...

There seemed to be a battle royale going on in this mall. :oops:

It looks like we were in pairs, but my partner was out for the round. o_O

I dunno, but eventually I was out at one point too, but I was back in?? o_O

I hid behind something for most of the game after that. :oops:

There were only two teams left now and they fighting it out in this lit room.

Both teams only had women. Actually all the teams in this battle royale were women except my team which was with my friend who was a guy. o_O

I decided to attack from the sides since there was only one of me. :oops:

However, it seemed like I attacked the runner ups in my pot shots so I focused my attention on the stronger women.

The runner up women actually didn't attack me when I revealed myself to attack the other women because they could make use of me since the other team was stronger than them after all... So they continued to attack the other team even though they could easily get rid of me since I was focused on the other team..

Once they got rid of the stronger team with my help... They would get rid of me next. o_O

...It is a battle royale. Only one team can win. :oops:

However, eventually the stronger team eliminated both members of the second placing team...

But now there was only one woman left and she was greatly weakened from the fighting that I was able to take her out easily. :oops:

She barely had any health after that like probably around 10-15%...

...

Sorry ladies. Victory royale. 🤪

:LOL:

There were several more dreams but I don't quite remember them sadly. :cautious:

One of them might've been about lots of snow, but I'm not entirely sure...

Anyways, that was all I could remember for tonight. :)

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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I remember the weirdest part the best:

I had to clean out a bathtub. It was just a tub, not even attached to anything. It had two pinkish rings around the top third of it. It looked like the pink in Dr. Suess's The Cat in the Hat Comes Back illustrations. I had to use a dish-washing scrub brush and Dawn Powerwash spray to clean the tub. (This dream was just so on-brand...) There were two talking women nearby when I was cleaning it. They were middle-aged Japanese women. (Somehow I just knew their nationality, and I'm surprised they weren't Chinese since I've been studying Mandarin Chinese lately.) The scrub brush gained a vibration function, like a power toothbrush, so I made short work of the stained bathtub.

Then I realized that one of the women had a pinkish line around her body because she always took a bath the same way every time in that tub. So then I used the vibrating brush and Dawn soap to clean her off. It felt like a very commonplace thing to do. Then the women summoned a Japanese man around my age, maybe their son. He didn't need to be cleaned with the brush, but I used the vibrating function to massage his bare stomach while he reclined on me like I was a chair. That was a little strange. My husband was in the dream later, and he either didn't know about it or didn't care!
 

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I've had many long, vivid dreams in my time away from PerC... I'll probably post them over the next few days in groups of 3-5 (with titles and spoiler tags).

1. Exchanges (very long):

 
I was at my old high school in the dream, but I was friends with the people I met in college. During my freshman year of high school, classes were on an A/B block schedule where we had 8 classes; classes 1, 3, 5, and 7 would meet on one day, and classes 2, 4, 6, and 8 would meet on the next, and the days would alternate between odd and even days. (One of my friends from college said that her high school operated the same way, and she seemed appalled when I told her that the school made us switch to 7 classes each day in my sophomore year. She happened to be the friend who appeared in my dream, an ISFJ.) Anyway, this dream took place on an even day. (I had earth science, agricultural science, physical education, and geometry class in that order.)

Something happened between my grandfather's house and the local community playground at the beginning of the dream, though I remember little of it.

I remember walking to my agricultural science class at the high school (which normally took place in a small building in front of the greenhouse and shade house, but it took place inside the greenhouse in the dream; the shade house was also connected to the greenhouse by a door in the dream). I followed a familiar-looking girl into the greenhouse, and I recognized her as my ISFJ friend when she turned her head a little bit. She was carrying some heavy things and was about to struggle to open the shade house door, so I called her name to get her attention and reached past her to open the door. She thanked me and went inside. I told her I was going to sit in the greenhouse. She told me that her roommate wanted her to sit in the shade house, but she'd ask her roommate if they could sit behind me in the greenhouse instead.

ISFJ’s roommate arrived, recognized me, and decided that she and my ISFJ would sit behind me. The three of us talked for a little bit, though I don't remember what we talked about.

The teacher came in, and he looked like the professor of one of my college classes (about horticulture). He started giving the class a presentation, but I had to leave because I was called to the front office with two other students. The three of us needed to take psychiatric evaluations, and we had to decide when we'd take them. One student wanted to take his during the current period and walked through a door. I was with one other boy, and he didn't have a preference. I preferred to get out of geometry over physical education, so I spoke up and said I'd take mine at the end of the day. The bell rang, and we were allowed to go to our 6th-period classes.

I walked down to the tennis courts but ran into ISFJ along the way. She said she was nervous about something, and she told me a story that didn't make sense (I think I became aware that I was dreaming at that point; the order of her sentences was too nonsensical to be real). I tried my best to listen even though the story didn't have a discernible plot. The bell rang when she finished, and we decided that we could make it to the tennis courts before the teacher got there if we ran, so that's what we did.

We stood in our respective spots so the teacher could take attendance. Since my last name was called before my friend's, I waited for her name to be called so we could walk to the locker room together. While we walked, I cheerfully told her that I had an excuse to skip geometry class and didn't have to see the horrible teacher. ISFJ smiled kind of sadly and then leaned against a brick wall lining a small staircase. I told her that she seemed really upset, and I asked her what was wrong.

She lowered her head and told me the exact same story as before, though I could understand what she was saying this time. I don't remember many details of the story, but it was about a sports rival of hers. As she told the story, I remember seeing a tennis match between her and an unfamiliar girl; my friend wore a black face mask while the rival girl wore a white one. My friend's mom was also there and wore a black face mask. I watched the story unfold as she told me, though I failed to see what was so distressing about it. Still, I leaned closer to ISFJ and rested my left hand on her right shoulder. I told her that I heard her and was there to support her in any way I could. She leaned into me and gave me a bit of a side-hug before we walked into the girls' locker room.

The door to the girls' locker room actually led to my parents' master bedroom and bathroom. I walked into the bathroom, closed the door, undressed, and took a bath. When the water finished filling up, ISFJ opened the door and walked inside the bathroom. I covered my chest with my arms and turned to look at her in the doorway (she still had her clothes on). All we could do was giggle at each other, though the giggling somehow didn't seem awkward. She got closer, and we talked about something while I cleaned myself, though I don't remember what it was. As the conversation went on, I eventually lowered my arms from my chest, and she rested her right hand on my left shoulder.

She left after I finished bathing myself. When I left the master bathroom and bedroom, I realized that I was back inside my parents' house. My father was there, and I told him that I was able to skip my horrible geometry class because I had a psychiatric evaluation. He seemed happy for me and joked about the geometry teacher. I donned some earrings and left the house in a wheelchair.

When I got about halfway down the lawn, I got out of the wheelchair and walked towards the street, albeit shakily. My neighbors from across the street (a husband and wife) said they thought I couldn't walk, and I made a sarcastic remark about my lameness being exposed. (My left foot was really injured at the time of this dream, but I didn’t have that much trouble walking most of the time.) They laughed, and the wife came over to me. She wanted to trade earrings, so I gave her two pairs of stud earrings: peridots and ones that looked like sparkly donuts. When I looked back at her, I realized that she had one blue eye and one green eye in the dream. (I never really paid attention, but I'm pretty sure she has two hazel eyes IRL.) I don't remember what she gave me in return, but she did give me something. I joked about handing over my cross earrings, though I didn't actually have any earrings of the sort. (I'm pretty sure I have some cross earrings IRL, but I haven't worn earrings since I was in high school.) My local aunt on my mom’s side of the family then showed up and begged me not to hand over the cross earrings, though her voice sounded kind of like she was joking.


2. Hit and Run (short):

 
I only remember one short part of this dream.

I exited a shop with my brother and the same ISFJ friend of mine from the previous dream. My brother held the door for us on our right, but the three of us heard a crash at our left. We turned and saw that a silver car had hit a parked green car and taken its front bumper off. The silver car drove off while the three of us stood in shock.

ISFJ started shaking and said that the green car was hers. I remember expecting my brother to comment on her voice (he knows of her but doesn’t actually know her IRL; I expected him to be surprised by her voice for some reason), but he didn’t say anything.

I offered to drive ISFJ to the auto part store, and she said she might take me up on my offer. After she called her parents, she decided that she could take care of the car on her own, and I bid her farewell but reminded her that I would still be willing to help her if she ever needed me. She smiled and drove away in the damaged car.


3. The Bridge (long):

 
I'd call this dream a nightmare. It was weird because it felt like the entire dream was mimicking the feeling of having a recurring nightmare. For some context, I got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and didn’t expect to fall back asleep even though I still felt extremely tired. I had a song stuck in my head, “Poison” by Alice Cooper. I fell asleep with the song stuck in my head.

First, I dreamed that I drove my best friend (ENFP) to a Chinese restaurant. We didn’t have face masks but went inside anyway; we were already going to have to take off our masks to eat. The restaurant was packed, and I asked her if she wanted to eat in my car because there were no available tables inside the restaurant.

Right then, my close friend (INTJ) and a woman who looked a lot like my best friend’s mom invited us to sit with them. After sitting and eating with them, I went to the bathroom and ended up inside a video game I used to play when I was younger. I was in the middle of a ceremony and proceeded to a bonus area of the game. While in the bonus area, I climbed up a tower that wasn’t actually in the game. There was a covered bridge at the top of the tower, and there was a rail along the edge (though it was easy to slide out under it).

When I stepped onto the bridge, the door closed behind me, and I had to fight a giant snail. I stunned it and kicked it under the railing. It disappeared when it hit the ground, and I was allowed to proceed on the bridge. A giant crab then spawned and blocked the rest of the bridge. I stunned the crab and kicked it under the railing. A large common tiger snake (an extremely venomous Australian snake) spawned in its stead, and the second chorus of “Poison” began playing in the dream. The snake bit me a few times, but I ended up kicking its tail under the railing and watching the rest of its body slide out. When I proceeded, an eagle spawned, and I had to knock it out and kick it under the railing.

I woke up in the dream, and the song “Poison” was playing on my phone on my night table. I turned off the music, left my bed, and told my parents about my nightmare. They said it sounded scary and told me to go back to bed (I was convinced that I was awake at this point, but I was still dreaming). I went back to bed as they suggested.

I ended up back in the tower and had to fight the same animals in the same order as before, and “Poison” played when I fought the snake again. After fighting the eagle, I proceeded to the very end of the bridge, where I had to fight a giant multicolored snake. I suffered some damage from the fight, but I still defeated the snake. I proceeded to the room at the end of the bridge, and I had to fight a phantom with four arms. Three of the arms had puppets on them, and the hand of the fourth arm held a red X. Each puppet had a different power; one could punch me and deal a lot of physical damage, one could heal itself and the other limbs, and one could hurt me by casting offensive magic. I realized that I didn’t have the strength to defeat the phantom, especially after getting bitten by the snakes, so I ran around the room and dodged the phantom’s attacks.

I woke up again (in the dream) and heard “Poison” playing again. I turned my phone off and told my parents that I had the same nightmare as before, but there was a larger snake at the end. My mom said that my mind was probably trying to tell me something important. I then got ready for a field trip with some old classmates, but the field trip was to the tower and bridge again. I fought the animals again in the exact same order as before, but my alarm truly woke me up while I was getting ready to fight the eagle again.
 
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Well, last night I spent the night with Johnny Depp. ((( in my head )))

I'm not particularly a fan of Mr. Depp. I think he's messed up. I'm not a fan of messed up.

But in my dream, he was cool and I liked him. Sort of strange, right. (????)

I cannot remember what we were doing or where we were going. No interesting stuff to relay. All forgotten in the light of the day. But seriously, he can visit me in my head anytime he wants. If he doesn't act like an asshole.
 

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My thoughts and dreams have been kinda scattered lately. :cautious:

Tonight in the dream I think there was a snowstorm by the mall I think? :oops:

I don't remember much, but thankfully the hut was fine and we were able to take shelter. :)

I am not sure about the other people though.. :oops:

I also remember hearing the song Haitoku no Hana? Maybe the flash of Yoko-san's face? o_O

And in this other dream I was in the basement at the old house. I was sleeping in the bedroom but the door was slightly opened.

I could feel air and I think there was someone or something there but I couldn't exactly turn my head to see... o_O

I am also not sure if this was in real life or I was still in the dream, but when I awoke the whole room flashed and filled with red for a split second? o_O

Possibly an alarm or alert or something? ...Maybe the matrix is starting to fall apart? We're probably hooked up to the system in a facility somewhere.. :sneaky:

Okay, and in another dream I can barely remember...

I was wearing a woman's coat? o_O

I mean, it felt nice but... it was a little tight but just barely. It was a felt coat I think. Kinda fuzzy and soft. The coat also had a lot of white buttons to replace the zipper but I don't think these style coats had zippers. :oops:

Then the mall was also a university? It was like a mix of the two. o_O

I remember showing off my spearman skills too. Not with a real spear but with a pretend spear made out of plain air.

I might've picked up a technique or two from her style...

People seemed to be quite interested on what I was doing. Maybe they thought I was a little weird. o_O

Anyways, that was all I could remember for tonight. :)

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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This is a continuation of the dreams I had in my absence.

4. The Board Game (long):

 
I don’t remember when or how she told me, but my mother said I was supposed to meet some friends for dinner. I had assumed that they were friends from her work, but I had a feeling that they’d be my own friends.

I was walking up the hilly path I used to take from the grocery store to my college dorm from last year. I thought I was carrying something, but I don’t remember what that was. When I reached the top of the hill, I passed the church right before the intersection that led to university property. The church was small and seemed like a normal wooden building IRL, but it looked like a modern condo building in the dream (lots of glass). When I waited to cross at the intersection by the university property, I noticed that two girls were walking towards the church with Starbucks drinks in their hands. They weren’t wearing face masks, so I stepped a bit off the path to let them stay away as they passed me (though I don’t think I was wearing a mask, either).

I crossed the street and walked over to the nearest building: the law school, which was actually a library in the dream. Nobody was wearing masks inside the building, but the tables were spread very far apart. I walked to the back corner of the building, and I saw my mom sitting at a table with my ISFJ friend from the first two dreams here and a friend from middle school/former floor mate at the university. My mom and ISFJ waved at me, though the old friend barely acknowledged me. My mom and the old friend were on the side of the table nearest to the wall, and ISFJ sat by herself on the other side, so I took a seat next to her. My mom left, allowing my friends and I to play the board game by ourselves. I’m pretty sure ISFJ took my mom’s turn in the latter’s absence.

ISFJ asked me if I had any plans after the board game, and I told her that I was going to eat dinner with my mom’s friends. She then smiled a little awkwardly and cleared her throat, almost as though to say that they were the friends I was supposed to eat with.

I said, “Ah. No, I guess I don’t have plans tonight.” That made ISFJ giggle for some reason. I said a couple other things that made her giggle, but I think it was the deadpan nature of my comments that made her laugh. (I remember that she laughed when I said something about seeing a sad-looking Starbucks behind some black glass in the building.) The old friend got frustrated with us and got up from the table.

ISFJ and I also got up, and we wandered off to my parents’ master bathroom. We briefly talked, though I don’t remember what we talked about. When we walked back to the table, it had been laid out like a dinner table. My friends were sitting where they sat before, but my mom had taken my seat. I sat at the head of the table.

My mom began flirtatiously massaging ISFJ’s shoulders while the latter ate some turkey, and I gave her a look as if to say, “Knock it off!” (I used to have romantic feelings for ISFJ, but I gave my mom the glare to back off because I was worried about my friend’s comfort, not because I felt any form of jealousy.) My mom then left, and my old friend followed her out.

ISFJ and I finished the game together. I think she ended up winning, and then we cordially parted ways.

Some more things happened while I remained by myself, but I don’t remember many specific details. I just remember that my brother approached me at one point and said that a nearby image of a fictional girl reminded me of ISFJ, and I agreed with him (even though the girl in the image looked nothing like the friend; the hair color, hairstyle, eye color, and height were all inaccurate).


5. Unorthodox Tandem (long):

 
I don’t remember very much from this dream. I was inside my parents’ house with my current friend from the previous dreams (ISFJ from #1, #2, and #4), my local cousins, a few relatives from the north (a female cousin, her husband, and a male cousin), and a few old university classmates. I don’t remember what we were doing there, but my parents were supposed to chaperone all of us on some sort of adventure.

ISFJ asked if I could watch her pet uromastyx (she doesn’t have any lizards, and the “uromastyx” looked more like a colorful monitor lizard). I happily obliged and agreed to guard it with my life. I thought it would be a good idea to put the lizard in with my bearded dragon (which wasn’t my real bearded dragon; my real bearded dragon is a bright yellow female, but this one was a tan male). Normally, that would have been a horrible idea.

The lizards seemed to get along well, so I left the room to take a bath. I don’t actually remember being in the bath, but I remember getting out and realizing that I didn’t have any clothes, so I covered myself with a blanket. I really wanted to show ISFJ how the lizards were getting along with each other, so I asked her to come into the room with me. The lizards were snuggling each other when we got in there, and her lizard appeared to kiss my dragon. We laughed at it and left the room, though I made sure that she stayed in front of me because my backside was poorly covered.

A loud noise woke me up, but I must have slipped into a dream that operated on the same timeline. Instead of being at my parents’ house, everyone from before was at some sort of abandoned farm. My local male cousin (who I don’t remember seeing earlier) and I entered the house and realized that it had an elevator. We took it up and realized that the place was haunted. When we got off the elevator, a young female ghost appeared in front of us and began singing “It’s raining, it’s pouring…” and gesturing for us to join her down the hall. We refused to go, and she disappeared when she reached the end of the song. The elevator took us sideways and then down again, and we exited the building in a machinery storage unit. The parts of broken-down farm vehicles began moving on their own, and I remember leaving the building because I was frightened.

Outside, I saw nearly everybody from before except for my ISFJ friend. The two male northern relatives (the cousin and cousin-in-law) were riding donkeys attached to a cart stacked with wooden boards. They told me to get in the cart, but I had to sit on top of the boards. I sprawled myself out on top of the boards and held on to them for dear life because the ride was bumpy. We got off at another farm building and went inside.

There was a row of bicycles on the inside, so I took a tall black and green one in the middle because I liked the colors. (It also had a word on it… something that began with an R like riff or rim, but I don’t remember exactly what it was.) ISFJ then arrived and entered the building. When I saw her, I dismounted the bike and selected the small pink and black one next to it because I thought she’d like the black and green one better, and it was better suited for her height. Despite the fact that the smaller bike was much better suited for my small size, it was quite difficult to mount. ISFJ got on the black and green bike next to me.

An old woman came up to ISFJ and I, and she handcuffed us together (the cuff was on my right hand and my friend’s left). She told us that we had to ride side by side, but we could only look at the ground. It took a very short amount of time for us to find the perfect speed to bike in unison. The lady then told us that we could stop, and we were in the same spot as we were before, still handcuffed to each other. I began talking to some nearby people about how Donald Trump is a narcissist, and they looked surprised to hear me say that. ISFJ, however, gently nodded her head as I spoke.


6. A Delayed Truth (long):

 
I’ve forgotten quite a bit of this dream, but I remember a few notable things.

The first thing I remember is being in my old middle school. I was with two of my friends who were a year younger than me, a boy and a girl. (I had feelings for the girl but was in denial, so I implicitly confessed and destroyed the friendship… I’ve explained this many times.)

Anyway, in the dream, I told the boy that I was going to confess my feelings to the girl and wanted him to be there with me. (In high school, before I was out of the closet, he used to make comments about me being gay. I told him that I had sometimes wondered about it, and he seemed pretty supportive; he treated it like it was a normal thing and even asked me if I had a girlfriend yet in our later high school days. I don’t know why he would have brought it up to me unless the girl told him about the implicit confession, though...) He agreed to be with me, and the two of us followed the girl into the breezeway between buildings.

I said, “[Girl’s name], I have something I need to tell you.”

The girl turned around and looked at me as students began to exit the buildings for dismissal.

Despite the growing crowd, I decided to continue. “I told you something that will haunt me for years, so I just need to be open with my feelings: I like you. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way, but I needed to tell you exactly how I feel.” (I think that’s how it went; I remember using past, present, and future tense in a rather illogical manner.)

Her face seemed rather blank. She then said, “Okay.” Instead of being afraid, she was purely uninterested and unsurprised by my words.

I smiled and turned to the boy. “She said okay.”

He then said, “She said okay!”

Among other things, I remember riding and then picking out the hooves of a gray horse. When I put the horse back, I left and drove to a science fair in the local church’s old building. The song “Shatter Me” by Lindsey Stirling (ft. Lzzy Hale) played on the drive there, and there was a large Trump 2020 banner in the parking lot behind the building.

When I went inside the church building, I saw that a girl had laid out a bunch of chocolates on the table where her display board was. The chocolates were shaped like teardrops and wrapped in foil that made them look like Dragon Quest slimes, and they were just a little smaller than my fist. The girl offered me one, and I accepted her offer and took a bite. After my first bite, I said that the slime wrappers made me happy. The girl’s father then told me that the science experiment was really a social experiment about judgment. A person would either be judged as a glutton for accepting the chocolate or judged as an asshole for refusing it. He took a bite out of one of the chocolates and said that he’d prefer to be an asshole. The chocolate began to melt in my hand, and I hesitated to take another bite before waking up.

Oddly enough, I think the girl and her father resembled some people I once met while I was waiting in line at a Lindsey Stirling concert. That was three years ago now, but I remember their faces, voices, and temperaments quite distinctly.
 
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Continuing again... this is probably my favorite group of dreams. Even though they weren't necessarily pleasant, I thought they were the most thought-provoking, especially the first one.

7. The Cinema (medium-long):

 
I’ve forgotten most of this dream, but I mostly remember being in a cinema with some friends of mine, past and present.

I arrived at the cinema in a launched roller coaster train and saw my ISFJ friend, but I don't think she saw me. I then went inside the cinema and wandered a bit until I found the theater where I was supposed to watch a film.

I don’t remember much about the film, just that it was an animated movie about birds and that I didn’t like it. I started off near the front of the cinema but progressively moved backward as the movie went on. As I moved backward, I saw friends from elementary school through high school (and then ISFJ from college). I also started to feel feverish as the movie continued.

At one point, a friend of mine from high school (ESTJ) entered the cinema wearing very revealing clothing. She got my attention, and I walked her outside the theater so we could talk without disrupting the movie. I asked her how she was doing, and she was supposedly doing well. I started coughing and feeling sick, which caused her to back away from me. She took out a temperature-scanning gun and aimed it at my forehead. She told me that I had a fever, and she couldn’t be friends with me anymore but hoped I’d understand why. She left before I could react.

I walked back into the cinema and sat as far away from people as I possibly could. I looked over at my ISFJ friend, and something about her seemed off. She was engrossed in the movie but didn’t look like she felt well. I noticed some of the other people behind me (friends from elementary/middle school), and I left the theater when they started whispering to each other.

This time, the theater doors let out into my parents’ kitchen. There was a rat infestation in my parents’ house, and an old cat was chasing the rats around the house. My mom encouraged the cat to kill the rats. I caught a large, slow-moving rat by my feet and tried to kill it quickly by breaking its neck. I whispered that I was sorry and tried to kill it, but it wouldn’t die. It transformed into a bearded dragon, and I started freaking out because I thought about my own bearded dragon and felt like I had attempted to kill her. (Speaking of her, she watched me try to kill the rat/lizard the whole time.) I set the lizard down, sat by the kitchen sink, and cried because I was so shocked at what I had done.

My ISFJ friend, who looked unwell, entered my bathroom and was in there for a long time. She left and went to get my mom, closing the bathroom door behind her. I overheard my mom talking with my friend, and my friend had apparently gotten sick in the bathroom and needed help. I wanted to comfort her and clean up after her, but I figured that she might have felt embarrassed because she had just gotten sick in my bathroom.


8. Designated Driver (medium-long)

 
I only remember a few parts of this dream. It involves the same friend who was in most of my other dreams (ISFJ).

The first thing I remember is walking past the residence hall my friend lived in last year. I don’t remember what I was doing there, but I crossed paths with my friend. We walked to one of the restricted parking lots and decided to talk there for a bit. When we entered the parking lot, our surroundings faded to white except for a single lamp post.

I don’t remember exactly what we talked about at first, but I remember saying this at one point:

“The feelings I had were pretty mild back then. I didn’t even think I was going to tell you at all because I thought you might hate me for it.”

She blinked and widened her eyes like she did when I told her I liked her, but she grimaced slightly this time; she smiled a little bit when I told her I liked her IRL.

I saw her expression and quickly replied, “Even though I knew you long enough to believe that you wouldn’t hate me for it! It was just afraid of it. I had bad experiences, and I didn’t know what else to expect.”

She said something about never being able to hate someone for feeling the way I felt, and she was glad that I got it off my chest. She then said something about her and her roommate planning to get really drunk, though I don’t remember exactly why they planned to get drunk. I told them that I’d accompany them and drive them to make sure they were safe.

Later on, I was at my parents’ house, and it was Christmas time. I was making these chocolate sweets with more chocolate candies on top of them, and I made a remark about preparing to give myself diabetes. I then made some cookies and tried to lay them on a cookie sheet, but they wouldn’t line up. My [deceased] childhood dog was there, and he begged me to give him some attention. I decided to stop making sweets and give him some attention. My aunt and paternal grandfather came over, and they told me to put my bearded dragon in her Christmas costume. (IRL, my mom bought my dragon a reversible Christmas-themed vest that says “Nice” on one side and “Naughty” on the other.) I told them no and that I had to leave to help my drunk friends.

I somehow ended up at the school within a short period of time, and a bunch of middle-aged women (Karens) had invaded the campus and were protesting something. I saw my friend, but she was sober. I asked where her roommate was, and she said she didn’t know. She asked to walk with me for a bit, so we walked around the east side of campus together while she told me some stories about her past. Apparently, the Karens reminded her of some things that happened to her while she was a teenager, and the Karens turned into actresses who acted out the stories as my friend told them.


9. Dogsled, houseboat (medium-long)

 
I’ve forgotten a lot about this dream, but ISFJ was in it again. We were looking at the security tapes of an amusement park, and my friend saw a cute feral cat on the cameras. She rewound the video to show me the cat (which looked a lot like her pet cat IRL). In the same video, I noticed that my parents’ dog was attached to a sled/caravan of wagons and strollers, and she was running amok through the park with a bunch of children in tow. (My parents’ dog is tiny and looks like a corgi/poodle/etc. mix, so it looked quite odd to see her pull the entire caravan with such ease.) I told my friend that I wondered why the dog was in the park, and I thought it was a dangerous situation. She agreed.

We briefly parted ways, and I ended up at the university. I was trying to find a library to study in, but most of them were either underground, in the student union, or in the new physics building. I didn’t want to go to those for some reason, so I went home.

The residential lots in my parents’ neighborhood were replaced with a series of canals, and everybody lived in houseboats that were tethered to the main sidewalk and road. My parents’ house was no exception, but their houseboat was docked at the corner of the main road and the side street we currently live on. (We live at the end of the side street IRL.) The houseboat interior resembled the inside of the real-life house, but everything was more compact. ISFJ was already inside the houseboat with my parents’ dog. The dog seemed to like her, though, which was a pleasant surprise because the dog hates strangers.

I tried looking for a sledding harness for the dog, but I couldn’t find it. I spent several hours looking for it around the house (even though it only felt like a couple of minutes, nightfall came quickly). ISFJ was just petting the dog the entire time, mostly rubbing the dog’s belly. After a while, she asked if I still planned to take the dog out if I found the harness, and I said yes, as long as she still wanted to. She said she was ambivalent. I realized that it was 11:30 PM, and I told her that it was getting too late. I asked her if it was okay if we stayed home, and she said yes.

ISFJ then asked when she should call her mom to pick her up. I told her that it takes about 2 ½ hours to get back to [her real hometown], so she could either call her mom sometime soon or spend the night and wait for her mom to pick her up the next day. She said she wanted to spend the night, but my parents arrived and said that my friend’s mom was coming. I didn’t argue, but I still prepared a place for ISFJ to sleep comfortably while my parents tried to reconfigure the houseboat’s position by the dock. I remember the boat rocking a bit, but only when I peeked outside to see what was going on.

I was honestly surprised at the accuracy of my comments about my friend’s hometown. I got the city name and the travel time correct even though it was a dream. (My recollections of real-life details are often inaccurate in my dream conversations.)


10. Turned tables (long)

 
I’ve forgotten a lot about this dream, but I remember being on a field trip to an amusement park with a lot of my middle school classmates. However, most of the social outcasts became bullies, and most of the bullies were bullied in the dream. Everybody looked like they did in middle school, so they were still taller than me but looked like children.

The main bully was this one girl who was treated as a bit of a weirdo by most of the kids in my class. (I’m 99% sure she was an ENFP.) She was a pretty nice girl overall and was very smart, but she was bullied for being a bit histrionic and having different interests from most of the students. I never outright bullied her, but I sure as hell didn’t try very hard to stop other people from doing it.

Anyway, in the dream, I was in a gift shop. I saw a rainbow horse plush that I really liked and wanted to buy. After I bought it, some of the outcasts started making fun of me for being bisexual (even though I’m gay, not bisexual). I tried to avoid them by hiding behind product displays in the store. Many of my old friends, some of whom were bullies in middle school, hid behind the display with me.

Some things happened, but I don’t remember what they were. I ended up back at the entrance to the gift shop and saw the rainbow horse plush again. I forgot that I had already purchased it, so I went to purchase it again. When I picked one up, the main bully (who was bullied IRL) tried to pull it out of my hand and kept trying to twist my wrists and arms. She told me that I already had one, and I then remembered that I did have one. I let it go and decided to hide behind the display in the corner of the shop again. I told my friends that the girl seemed sweet, so I was shocked that she treated me the way she did.

One of my friends then said, “I mean, you are bisexual, though.”

I didn’t feel like explaining anything, so I got up and left.

While I was near a corner of the park that had lots of pagodas, I saw the girl I liked back in middle school. She was with her two close friends at the time, but she was sitting on the floor while they were standing around her.

She noticed my presence, but I don’t think she recognized me. I thought about apologizing to her for my awkward implicit confession because I never got to do that in real life. But I then realized that she might not have remembered who I was. I stared at her for a while to see if I could remember exactly what I felt when I was friends with her, but I couldn’t feel attracted to her. The more I looked at her, the more she looked like a child, or at least a young teenager (even though she would be 20 years old IRL). I decided to apologize to her, but she departed with her friends as soon as I decided.


I can’t stop thinking about the bullied girl, though. I almost became friends with her when she was new to the school, but I was scared off by her histrionics and already had a friend group (who chose to ignore her most of the time). I feel pretty bad about everything. There was one day when the girl was talking about how worthless she was, and I tried to reassure her that she was an important person who had value and a bright future. I believed everything I said, but I didn’t try very hard to defend her from the aggression of my own friends on other occasions. I could have done more to make her middle school life easier, and I failed because I was a jerk.

I hope she’s all right.
 
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