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So I had a conversation with an ISTJ on this site about a vague survey conducted to show which MBTI types are the most sexually attractive. Amazingly and an obvious call for bs, ENFPs came out on top.
We both agreed that it's because of so many mistyped ESFJs, ENFJs and ESFPs out there who think they're ENFPs and straight/bi men encounter those charming, bubbly and feminine women more and automatically classify them as ENFP therefore why ENFPs came out on top.
Either that or pure idealization of the ENFP character that are simply fantasy.

Said ISTJ and I both agreed that if the mbti world knew true ENFPs who weren't mistyped, our votes would be much much lower. Some even outright say we're annoying. Even yesterday, my whole family admitted that between my ENFJ mom and I, ENFJ mom is the more attractive and seductive one while I 'come off scary in my authenticity' much to my dismay and chagrin and to my mom's inflated ego.

I had a conversation with my INTP friend today and she echoed the same observations in her environment. This is what she said:






I find this to be pretty spot on the more I think about it. Even as an ENFP myself, I find other ENFPs efforts to be 'different' and constantly putting other ENFPs as other types when they're not 'authentic' enough or 'Ne' enough to fit their almighty criteria to elicit a roll of eyes from me.

She then went on to describe the core differences between ENTP and ENFP females other than functions:




In conclusion, it would seem the people who are attracted to us are also weird themselves who like a wild challenge or phenomenon (-cough looking at you INTJ/INFJ/INFP lurkers cough-) or most of us are just meant to be forever alone lol?
 

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Discussion Starter #2
More input and this time from female ISTJ friend in her local community.
She said that males also prefer other types and these are her reasons although we both agreed what she listed isn't really mbti related:

 

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@Alassea. Tell me your thoughts. Are you wondering if people will refute this info? IS there a stereo type out there of ENFPs that is seen as attractive? I wouldn't have thought so. We can be annoying or perceived as self-involved. Our follow-through is often poor. BUT how can N's be anything but admiring of authenticity (as long as it isn't brash and is cradled in the arms of "this ENFP wants your happiness, has good-will towards you)? I can only think of 1 type who would be bothered (and not admiring or grateful) by authenticity--ESTPs since from what I feel or understand from them they feel like there are 2 worlds that play out in a game of life--the "appearances/rules world" and the "break rules/don't get caught/what I want" world. Maybe another similar type feels that too? We would be a threat to all that-- but otherwise.....? Plus I now know a older ESTP who is wonderful-- his "underground world" is secret acts of service.

Anyway, what would you like for people to comment on? Maybe ask questions?
Also... are there people SAYING they are our type to possibly attract others with that stereotype? Is this your question?
 

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@Alesha

I just want to hear objective thoughts from different people of what they perceive a true ENFP to be apart from stereotypical ideals.
We honestly have our fair share of lovers and haters not just from xSTPs, but from all others as well.
My vain self would love a refuge but I can appreciate constructive criticism too lol.
 

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In conclusion, it would seem the people who are attracted to us are also weird themselves who like a wild challenge or phenomenon (-cough looking at you INTJ/INFJ/INFP lurkers cough-) or most of us are just meant to be forever alone lol?
Yes, we ENFPs are all doomed to suffer in eternal and utter foreveraloneness because no one wants to deal with our authenticity except for weird people... *single tear*


Lol.

A lot of types are attracted to legit ENFPs, both in friendship and romance. It doesn't really matter if we're considered the most "desirable" type or not. ESFPs can have that position for all I care.

(P.S. Why would you have your heart set on marrying a normal person anyway? They're so... normal.)
 

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So I had a conversation with an ISTJ on this site about a vague survey conducted to show which MBTI types are the most sexually attractive. Amazingly and an obvious call for bs, ENFPs came out on top.
We both agreed that it's because of so many mistyped ESFJs, ENFJs and ESFPs out there who think they're ENFPs and straight/bi men encounter those charming, bubbly and feminine women more and automatically classify them as ENFP therefore why ENFPs came out on top.
Either that or pure idealization of the ENFP character that are simply fantasy.

Said ISTJ and I both agreed that if the mbti world knew true ENFPs who weren't mistyped, our votes would be much much lower.
You claim that a survey has failed to control for various things, yielding a false positive result. Don't you think that the only way to show that this is true would be to conduct your own survey where you control for the relevant things and get the result you predict?
 

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You claim that a survey has failed to control for various things, yielding a false positive result. Don't you think that the only way to show that this is true would be to conduct your own survey where you control for the relevant things and get the result you predict?
It's been done by an INTP and ESTP before. The results were somewhat similar, but again. The mistypes can come into play and of course, there's a lot of N bias going on what with forums being dominated mostly by Ns.
 

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It's been done by an INTP and ESTP before. The results were somewhat similar, but again. The mistypes can come into play and of course, there's a lot of N bias going on what with forums being dominated mostly by Ns.
Are you agreeing or disagreeing with what I said?
 

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I'm answering your question.
Right. I'm going to interpret this as you saying that have answered my question with your previous response. I'll rephrase my question on the basis of this assumption. Namely, is your answer consistent or inconsistent with what I said? I'm asking because I can't tell. If it is neither, then it is not clear to me that it is an answer to my question after all.
 

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You claim that a survey has failed to control for various things, yielding a false positive result. Don't you think that the only way to show that this is true would be to conduct your own survey where you control for the relevant things and get the result you predict?
I like it, Seq. It would be a bit of work, Alassea, and you'd have to get all our various ENFP input on what we think we would control for.
lol. Were those studies you mentioned done on PerC? Or more official.
 
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Right. I'm going to interpret this as you saying that have answered my question with your previous response. I'll rephrase my question on the basis of this assumption. Namely, is your answer consistent or inconsistent with what I said? I'm asking because I can't tell. If it is neither, then it is not clear to me that it is an answer to my question after all.
Sorry, I had some trouble interpreting what you were saying but I think I got the gist of it.
To answer your question, it's difficult because there's a huge mbti population who mistyped themselves, others, and the whole thing is basically messy.
If I conduct something like this controlling specific things, it's literally gauging a gemstone in a haystack and it's simply not enough data to form any conclusions.

The quotes I posted in my original post are from two, well-learned, mbti researchers that have studied the topic for years and objectively observed their environments. The INTP said that ESxP women were the more popular. The ISTJ said that ISxP women were the most popular. In short, SPs were the conclusive from those two.

For myself, I'm the only irl ENFP I know so I can't say much other than my own experiences.
 

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I like it, Seq. It would be a bit of work, Alassea, and you'd have to get all our various ENFP input on what we think we would control for.
lol. Were those studies you mentioned done on PerC? Or more official.
It was both on PerC and Typology. Every forum had a "Which Type Would You Like to Date Poll" and enfps were always somewhere at the top for the most part.
The only 'official' thing I've seen were Heidi Priebe's article which 85% called bullshit on even though she said she manipulated nothing lol.
 

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So I asked my husband about my likability once. I can't remember if I was asking in a dating context or what. He said, "Well, if we went to an ice cream store, you're not vanilla are you?" NO! Of course not, NOooooo.... And would I want a guy who wanted vanilla? Noooo.... Maybe with a ton of toppings and cherries.... I think Sylvirfoxx said what you needed to hear too.
But I'll tell you this too. My counselor this year said to me, "All I see is women who don't know what they want and who don't know how to get what they want. That's who I'm trained to help. I haven't exactly known what to do with you. "
Right at this moment I'm taking that as a compliment. I don't think we are alone... I worked with two really smart and successful ENTP women this last month and both of them admitted to me feeling like they were freaks because their personalities are so strong. One of them I told about MBTI, I said, "We have similar strengths... like you would never be okay not just gobbling up every piece of information you can get... and she strongly affirmed what I was saying. Once we're in a committed relationship, I think our men are really happy that they got us.
I also want to post something I found interesting... it's like the "Math of love".... I will find it...in a sec.
 

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My most concise explanation of the stereotype would be the manic pixie dream girl trope.

Personal experience with real ENFPs: there’s much more a sense of balance.

An internal darkness that contrasts with the glow they give off. Moments of reticence that diverge from the usual plethora of feelings. Intense, all-consuming periods of friendship tempered by them disappearing for significant periods of time. Capriciousness tempered by an iron will when something clashes with their ideals. An incredible amount of forgiveness and open mindedness, conflicting directly with stubbornly clinging to a conclusion when formed.

Real, human, flawed, beautiful people.

In terms of relationship statistics or attractiveness, I’ve got no clue. I only know two female ENFPs: one with a boyfriend, one single. *shrugs*
 

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Discussion Starter #17
"Well, if we went to an ice cream store, you're not vanilla are you?""All I see is women who don't know what they want and who don't know how to get what they want. That's who I'm trained to help. I haven't exactly known what to do with you. "
This. I hear this everyday of my life.

The general consensus is that most ENFPs to most of the population are these abrupt beings that not many can deal with haha.
 

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My most concise explanation of the stereotype would be the manic pixie dream girl trope.

Personal experience with real ENFPs: there’s much more a sense of balance.

An internal darkness that contrasts with the glow they give off. Moments of reticence that diverge from the usual plethora of feelings. Intense, all-consuming periods of friendship tempered by them disappearing for significant periods of time. Capriciousness tempered by an iron will when something clashes with their ideals. An incredible amount of forgiveness and open mindedness, conflicting directly with stubbornly clinging to a conclusion when formed.

Real, human, flawed, beautiful people.

In terms of relationship statistics or attractiveness, I’ve got no clue. I only know two female ENFPs: one with a boyfriend, one single. *shrugs*
Girl, I'm sure people have said this before but you should seriously consider being a poet as a side job. :blushed:
In the meanwhile, I'll make all the aesthetics you want after being inspired by your words.
 

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Windblownhair took the words right out of my mouth. I was literally just going to post about how ENFP's get stereotyped for being like the manic pixie dream girl which is an image or idea that tends to be attractive to guys.

Anyways, that's an interesting theory and I think it makes sense because ESFJ's, ENFJ's and ESFP's do mistype as ENFP's.
 
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