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Discussion Starter #1
I am an INFJ, and one of my best friends is an ENFP.

Incidentally, this guy who I have a big fat crush on is also an ENFP.

My ENFP friend (Angela, SpasmodicSquid) thinks he might like me, too.

But, she's a lady. We need an male ENFP's perspective.

Here are some things he's done:

1. I was talking with some friends at church when he came over with a pool noodle and hit me on the head with it. After a few moments of delay (I was confused), he said, "Goose!" and then ran away. I did not know how to play Duck, Duck, Goose, so I kind of just stood there. I started walking the other way, but when I looked back he was sitting in my chair and looking at me expectantly. Angela observed that he was very quiet other than saying "goose."

2. I do this thing where I meow. Just randomly. So, my other ENFP friend, Emily, said, "Sam, one day you're going to meet a guy who just randomly woofs." And then ENFP-hot-stuff *woofed.* Any significance there?

3. (Same day as the woof incident). I was talking with Emily and somehow got to talking about how I spend my Friday nights (testing out the spinny chairs at Staples), and said, "I'm such a boring person, you guys," in an only half-joking way. He then said, "No, you're not." Emily said, "Boring people do not just meow, Sam." ENFP-boy said, "Yeah!" And then that was the end of it. According to Angela, not being boring in an ENFP's mind is a really, really good thing?

4. (Also the same day as the woof incident) It was my birthday. When Emily approached us, she said, "Sam... Happy birthday." I had not told ENFP-boy (let's call him Simba) that it was my birthday. He then very enthusiastically said: "What!? It's your birthday? I didn't know it was your birthday! Happy birthday!"

5. (Now, we actually move on to a different day). He randomly thanked me, and seemed, maybe, just a teensy weensy bit nervous? I asked him about it on Facebook later, because I didn't want him to think I was being rude when I didn't reply to his thank you, and he said he "honestly didn't remember." Angela thinks he lied.

6. We make really intense eye contact. <3 At random times.

7. When we were playing in the church band (me on bass, and him on acoustic), he was standing diagonally. Angela has a theory that he was doing this so he could see me.

8. I introduced him to MBTI, and I said, "it's crazy how accurate it is." Then he playfully said, "Yeah, you *are* crazy."

9. When we first met, Mike, our pastor, said, "Yeah, Sam's learning to play bass." Simba said, "Really? Maybe I could show you some stuff," or, "Maybe you could show me some stuff." I'm not sure which way it went.

10. One time he picked up my bass and asked me what G was. Guitar and bass have the same notes. I told him, "third fret." He picked the first fret. "This one?" he asked. "No, the third fret," I said again. He played it. And then he started playing slap bass. Like, what?

11. One time, after church, he walked out of the building and we made instant eye contact. I then felt the need to say something, so I said, "Great job on worship tonight." He said, "heyy, thanks. Good job on bass." He had a friend with him, and his friend said, "What? You play bass?" Simba said, "Yeah, and she's good, man." Angela says he didn't look away from me (I was too nervous and shy to maintain eye contact).

12. This one isn't as much of a big deal, but after I told him he was an ENFP, he asked me, "What about you?" This may or may not be significant, but there were four other people with us, and he didn't ask any of them their type.

What does all of it mean? D:

Angela says he doesn't talk much to any of the others, but is careful to be nice to me.

I'm usually really good at reading people, but I am way out of my element when it comes to Simba.
 

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Most of what you mentioned has no significance, other than the woof incident, but more importantly the random intense eye contact. Is he the first one to initiate it? Also, what is Angela's relationship to Simba? Does she know him very well, or is just an ordinary friend? (Knowing him well will increase possibility of him liking you)
 

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Yeah, to be honest, it seems like you're over analyzing the situation (I do that too with people I like). Most of the stuff you said is the type of things I'd say to any friend. It definitely seems like he likes you, at least as a person, and I'm not saying that it's impossible (or even unlikely) that he feels the same way as you do. There's just not enough to go off. I can be really hesitant when it comes to girls I like... He might be over analyzing just like you. The eye contact is a good sign though.
I think you should talk to him... that's just my advice. Like I said, it's obvious that he at least likes you as a friend... and I don't think that you would lose him as a friend if he wasn't interested. If anything, it will be harder for you if he doesn't share the feelings... So if you're willing to take that risk, then go for it. But it also couldn't hurt to wait it out. Just try to keep calm around him and appreciate the time you already spend together.
 

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Most of what you mentioned has no significance, other than the woof incident, but more importantly the random intense eye contact. Is he the first one to initiate it? Also, what is Angela's relationship to Simba? Does she know him very well, or is just an ordinary friend? (Knowing him well will increase possibility of him liking you)
Angela here! Lol I don't know him any better than she does. Just intuition. I'm also a girl, so it's not good to go off of what *I* would do, but yeah... Personally, I thought the whole "goose!" thing was a big deal... You kinda had to be there, I feel like. Most of the time it's just the way he goes about these things to me, but the new perspectives help a lot!


(I do that too with people I like).
Speaking for my friend... What *do* male ENFPs do when they like someone? :)
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I'm not really sure who initiates it. I just know whenever I turn to look at him our eyes are just immediately locked, and he doesn't look away.
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Thank you for such an honest reply! Definitely gave me some insight. :)
 

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Yeah, TrollOnAMission seems like she's overanalyzing but I find how she's so taken with that ENFP to be warming to the heart. INFJ women are really cool for the most part, I like their demeanor and I find them often interesting and that they have a good physical style...Interesting clothes and makeup.
 

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Speaking for my friend... What *do* male ENFPs do when they like someone? :)
honestly, there's no "one thing" ENFPs do. i've changed my approach with girls a few times as i've gotten older. these days i tend to be pretty aggressive, but at the same time make myself a little hard to get and "normal" so that i don't come off as needy, and then as soon as i sense she likes me (i reckon if i were in his shoes for example i, not neessarily he but i, would already be able to tell you like me. but i would have been much less sure a few years ago and i'm 21) i ask her to go for a walk or to do something, then after we've been chatting a while i ask her on a proper date in a jokey way to ease the tension. that's pretty much how i usually approach, and i usually go for INFPs/INFJs too.

i do some of the things that OP listed though. although i don't do it every time, i remember i used to have a girl in my old class who i liked and we'd always be joking around and flirting, and we did the intense eye contact thing all the time- that's definitely a good sign, maybe the best sign of the lot, because if you accidentally make intense eye contact with people your usual reaction is to feel awkward and probably feel weird around the person, but if you like the person it feels normal and exciting, which it seems is how you're both reacting. i also feel that you can tell everything about how someone is feeling/thinking through the eyes, and whilst i used to be unsure of when i saw interest in a girl's eyes, i now have utter utter faith in what my intuition tells me someone's eyes are saying. the pupils actually dilate when someone is interested, which your brain picks up subconsciously, but you have to have faith in what it's telling you. having said that, with ENFP guys it can be a little tricky, because we sometimes like girls but not enough to want to go out with them. the signs seem good though.

the way he's enthusiastic about you does remind me of when i was younger too. i'm still like that a bit when i like someone, but these days because i show more interest directly to her, being enthusiastic about her seems a bit over the top, that's the only reason.

if you don't want to ask him out directly ask him to "do something" that's usually the more acceptably "feminine" way to go about it :p
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Go between "happy crazy playful" and "trying to act normal (and coming off awkward) just in case she likes me back". Le sigh.
It's interesting that you say this, because I act the same way around the person I like. Whenever I'm away from them, I'm my normal paradoxical moody-yet-really-nice self. Yet, when I'm near them I just get kind of crazy and over the top.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
Thank you all for the replies! I agree; I probably am over-analyzing everything. Unfortunately this bad habit doesn't stop at crushes. INFJ Probs. >.<
 

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It's interesting that you say this, because I act the same way around the person I like.
I'm the opposite, a couple of my friends have noticed I'm not my "happy crazy playful" self when around girls I like. I tend to go quiet and awkward, while remaining crazy, of course.

Bah. Why can't I be the quiet awkward guy normally and the loud happy playful crazy guy when around girls I like (and it's only them, aside from that I'm pretty good with anybody :p).
 

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Discussion Starter #16
Yup. It's definitely what most of us want.
Ooh. I'm sooo not the confrontational type. *bites nails.*

I'll just... hide in a corner or something?
 

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Discussion Starter #17
Bah. Why can't I be the quiet awkward guy normally and the loud happy playful crazy guy when around girls I like (and it's only them, aside from that I'm pretty good with anybody :p).
Hmm... I wish for the opposite. I wish that I would just be *normal* around the guys I like. I feel like I'm setting them up with false expectations, because I'm definitely not hyper-over-the-top all the time. Weird, yes. Maybe a little schizo, yes. Energetic? Not usually. q:
 

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Hmm... I wish for the opposite. I wish that I would just be *normal* around the guys I like. I feel like I'm setting them up with false expectations, because I'm definitely not hyper-over-the-top all the time. Weird, yes. Maybe a little schizo, yes. Energetic? Not usually. q:
Hehe. See, the difference is that I am, in my heart and soul, the hyper-over-the-top person that I am around most people. Or, at least, it is a large part, the majority part, of my personality; therefore it is not an issue of authenticity for me to be like that. And I feel so horrible and weak that when I develop infatuations with people I lose my ability to be myself and instead become a fumbling, weird teenage girl with a crush.

But at least I am glad that I never appear "normal" to people.

Nice avatar, by the way.
 

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Hehe. See, the difference is that I am, in my heart and soul, the hyper-over-the-top person that I am around most people. Or, at least, it is a large part, the majority part, of my personality; therefore it is not an issue of authenticity for me to be like that. And I feel so horrible and weak that when I develop infatuations with people I lose my ability to be myself and instead become a fumbling, weird teenage girl with a crush.

But at least I am glad that I never appear "normal" to people.

Nice avatar, by the way.
Great! ofcourse there is nothing wrong with being a teenage girl with a crush though, it's beautiful!

(ahem - wrong crowd to use that metaphor around!)
 

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Discussion Starter #20
Bahaha, no. I get what he meant. Teenage girls with crushes are definitely awkward, fumbly, and, honestly, a little bit scary. I annoy/freak myself out on a regular basis. o_O
 
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