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Discussion Starter #1
Hello! :D I'd be thankful if someone would like to help me figure out my Enneagram type. I haven't read that much about Enneagram yet and I thought it'd be better to do the questionnaire before reading too much (so I can't go "this is what I want to be/think I am and this is how that type would reply" which I don't want to do). It says on my signature that I'd be a 4w3 7w6 9w1 buuut-- I'm pretty sure that's not right. We just sort of decided without a doubt with my friend that I'm a four and I should admit that the 479-tritype maybe sounded more how I'd like to be than how I actually am. I think there should be a 6 somewhere in there instead of... something. And I don't think I'm a 4w3 - I just was so much like that a few years ago. So now I don't know anymore XDD

I'm 21 and I have severe obsessive-compulsive disorder so that might affect the questionnaire-- it's hard to draw the line between ocd and my personality anymore.

1. What drives you in life? What do you look for?
--Curiosity? Escapism? And my four or six problem with both wanting to be secure and unique. I want to be safe and free to make my own decisions. I also want to learn as much as I can about the world… anything from people to religion to how and why does the universe exist. But it doesn’t frustrate me that I can’t know everything. I like it that some things are mysteries to us.

2. What do you hope to accomplish in your life?
--I want to make at least someone’s life better. I think I want to help people individually. I want to stay happy. And I want to become a novelist and write something that can make people feel - fictional feelings? Because I think it's amazing when fiction makes you feel something, whether it's happy or sad. I want to see the world.

3. What do you hope to avoid doing or being? What values are important to you?
--I don’t want to judge anyone. I don’t want to be a person who thinks black-and-white. And I don’t want to live a quick-paced, stressing life. I don’t want to hurt people if it can be avoided. I don’t want to be a boring person but I’d rather be that than unhappy.

4. What are your biggest fears (not including phobias)? Why?
--Death, both my family and friends’ and mine. Totally unfamiliar situations. Physical pain. I really don't know why.

5. How do you want others to see you? How do you see yourself?
--I want others to see me as an entertaining, smart, and a little bit mysterious person, but also as a person they can rely on, a person who cares about everybody. I see myself as average-smart and funny, insecure, curious, awkward, lazy, a dreamer.

6. What makes you feel your best? What makes you feel your worst?
--My best when I’ve successfully done something, finished writing a story, helped a friend feel happier… My worst when I’ve hurt someone’s feelings or been totally unproductive for days or even weeks.

7. Describe how you experience each of: a) anger; b) shame; c) anxiety.
a) I don’t get angry often. And usually when I do I don’t show it. I used to, and I used to be very dramatic about it, in a passive aggressive way, thus I thought I could be 4w3.

b) When I feel ashamed it’s most likely because I think I did something that made other people think I’m stupid. But I can laugh at myself and usually get over it quickly even if the insecurity stays. And then there’re the times I want to bang my head against a wall because I recall what an idiot I was when I was a teenager - not in the stupid way but in the way that I hurt a lot of people. It’s different kind of shame.

c) I feel anxious a lot and overthink and sort of ”stay” in my anxiety a lot. I get stuck in it at times. And if it goes on for too long I can end up being incredibly frustrated at it and myself, to the point of throwing things and self-harm (I stopped doing that but I still might feel like doing it).

8. Describe how you respond to each of: a) stress; b) unexpected change; c) conflict.
a) Overthink everything. Try to make sure that things are under control. Or just ignore it and go into the amazing world of fiction.

b) Dislike. Dislike. Dislike. Don’t want. Hide. Very slowly adjust. Become depressed.

c) I don’t want to hurt anyone but there’s a side of me that enjoys a good debate. If it’s about relationship/friendship/feelings I try to compromise. If it’s about science/beliefs I might be too eager to explain my point of view.

9. Describe your orientation to: a) authority; b) power. How do you respond to these?
a) Going by rules is fine by me. I don’t mind someone else being the boss as long as they’re not trying to be the boss of my personal life. I’m a follower rather than a leader.

b) I don’t want anyone to have power over me. I don’t like anyone to have power over others… authority, yes but power-- no. Though I’m not sure what exactly is the difference or how to explain that. I don’t want to be in control of anyone else’s life either.

10. What is your overall outlook on life and humanity?
--On default, I like people. You have to act like a dick for me to not like you. And I can’t imagine hating anyone. I think life is an incredible mystery and that no human can ever know everything and have life and the universe all figured out. I think life is amazing.

11. Discuss an event that has impacted your life significantly; more importantly, how you responded to it.
--I lived in a foster home with other teens when I was 14-16, against my will. I was sent way too far from my home and treated unfairly - I think my social workers should’ve bothered to look for a place somewhere nearer. I also want to point out that none of this was because of my parents but my own mental health. I was bullied at the foster home and at times I was desperate to get out of there. I was very much a child at 14 but had to harden myself because of the bullies. I was genuinely scared of them but at 16 I ended up this sort of rebellious and unstable teenager. I didn’t care what anyone thought of me, treated my parents and friends badly, hated easily. At that point I enjoyed being hated but disliked being ignored. It took me years to become more emotionally stable and a good friend/daughter.

12. Comment on your relationship with trust.
--I don’t really have trust issues. I’d rather trust someone and get hurt than be suspicious of people. But that doesn’t mean that I trust people blindly. Sometimes I can be paranoid, though. About people just pretending to like me or hiding things from me. But I try not to let it go too far.

13. List some of the traits you: a) like; b) dislike most about yourself.
a) My imagination. And my curiosity. My ability to learn. My ability to feel. My passion on some things.

b) That I’m lazy and procrastinate a lot. I honestly am pretty sure that I do that more than an average person. And that I get annoyed and passive-aggressive easily even though it’s mostly just in my head-- passive-aggressive thoughts rather than actually saying or doing anything.

14. What do you see or notice in others that most people don't?
--I don’t know. I don’t like saying that I’m better than anyone at anything so ”most people” sounds wrong. I don’t know what most people notice!

15. If a stranger insults you, how do you respond/feel? What if they compliment you?
--I don’t caaare they’re just a stranger, insult me all you want. If they compliment me I get incredibly happy but I often don’t know how to respond. In both cases they noticed me and that’s good :DD

16. What's something you are: a) thankful you have; b) wish you could have? Why?
a) Good health, incredibly loving and amazing parents and friends, a good relationship with myself.

b) That I was stable enough to have adventures and travel. And more ambitions.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
@Krelian91 and @Swordsman of Mana thankyou the both of you! :D

Yeah, I'm starting to see myself more as a six than a four. And maybe 6w7 rather than 6w5 too. I'm not convinced of the 629 tritype though XDD Especially two sounds... too good to be me? Alright, I want to care and help people... but I can be selfish. This is also very recent, that I consciously make an effort to show that I care about everyone-- I used to be an idiot. And I just read about counter-phobic and phobic sixes and although I said that I used to enjoy being hated and don't care if strangers insult me and that sounds like a counter-phobic behaviour... I don't know if it is? I genuinely feel that I just don't care-- and I don't want to be hated anymore but I can in a way enjoy the attention if strangers insult me. Could it be really just that I don't know I'm actually anxious about what people think of me?
 

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@Krelian91 and @Swordsman of Mana thankyou the both of you! :D

Yeah, I'm starting to see myself more as a six than a four. And maybe 6w7 rather than 6w5 too. I'm not convinced of the 629 tritype though XDD Especially two sounds... too good to be me? Alright, I want to care and help people... but I can be selfish. This is also very recent, that I consciously make an effort to show that I care about everyone-- I used to be an idiot. And I just read about counter-phobic and phobic sixes and although I said that I used to enjoy being hated and don't care if strangers insult me and that sounds like a counter-phobic behaviour... I don't know if it is? I genuinely feel that I just don't care-- and I don't want to be hated anymore but I can in a way enjoy the attention if strangers insult me. Could it be really just that I don't know I'm actually anxious about what people think of me?
Busting the Myths of the Enneagram People Pleaser: Type 2Wendy Appel
 

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@Animal thanks! But I'm still not convinced about the two XDD Reading that I started to wonder why I want to help people, though, and I couldn't think of the answer. But I don't think it's because I want to feel needed-- more like I feel like I need to do so because I can. Which sort of sounds bad, "I'm helping you because I need to" but it's not just that.
 

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@Animal thanks! But I'm still not convinced about the two XDD Reading that I started to wonder why I want to help people, though, and I couldn't think of the answer. But I don't think it's because I want to feel needed-- more like I feel like I need to do so because I can. Which sort of sounds bad, "I'm helping you because I need to" but it's not just that.
^ "because I can" - still sounds to me like the vice of type 2, pride. "Only I can help this person."

I have given up trying to type people from threads so I won't push any argument here ;) but I would definitely recommend looking into the types further. Also, tritype, to me, is pretty irrelevant until you understand your core type and all the implications. Once that settles in, then exploring tritype is great =) but in the beginning of your typing journey it may distract from understanding all the implications of the core type. So yes, if you see 2 in yourself it's worth exploring at this juncture cuz it may be your core, but if you're pretty settled on core 6, I would recommend learning a lot about that...

Check out these links for starters:

http://personalitycafe.com/type-6-forum-loyalist/151541-type-6-excerpts-maitri.html

http://personalitycafe.com/type-6-forum-loyalist/133044-cowardice-paranoid-character-accusation-naranjo.html

Oh, and keep in mind, Naranjo (the second link) can be a very tough read to digest; he gets to the bottom of the worst potential neurosis of any type. That is pretty advanced reading so you might want to save it for after you've read a few other things. I'd recommend "Spiritual Dimensions of Enneagram" by Maitri.

Also the 6 sub-forum is full of really insightful 6's who may be able to discuss any questions you might have. =)
 

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Discussion Starter #8
@Animal thank you so much! Will check out the links :DD

Animal said:
^ "because I can" - still sounds to me like the vice of type 2, pride. "Only I can help this person."
I didn't mean it like that-- at least I certainly hope I don't unconsciously think like that XDD More like... "I can see that this person is hurting and I know what it's like to hurt (although I'm not pretending to know exactly how they feel like) and it's my duty as a human being to try to make them feel better"? Because I'm not good at helping people. I want to be but I'm-- not. I just hope that I could do at least some good. But, yes, I will learn more about Sixes first :DD Talk about mistyping myself, I was so sure that I was a Four or that it'd at least be second...
 

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@Animal thank you so much! Will check out the links :DD


I didn't mean it like that-- at least I certainly hope I don't unconsciously think like that XDD More like... "I can see that this person is hurting and I know what it's like to hurt (although I'm not pretending to know exactly how they feel like) and it's my duty as a human being to try to make them feel better"? Because I'm not good at helping people. I want to be but I'm-- not. I just hope that I could do at least some good. But, yes, I will learn more about Sixes first :DD Talk about mistyping myself, I was so sure that I was a Four or that it'd at least be second...
People usually associate a sense of 'duty' with type 6.. there are probably others who can explain this better than I. I think looking at 6, from what I've read so far, is probably a very good direction to begin looking for core. =)
 
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