1) I can identify with you in the sense that it isn't love that bonds me to them as my family, but a great respect for who my parents and my own sister are and how they act. If they betrayed me somehow, I know that they would lose my respect and hence, my "love"Hi everyone. I just had a very awkward moment with my ESFJ mother, asking me if I love her, my brother, grandma etc. The thing is, I'm not even sure what that word means anymore. I mean, those people are certainly people who are friendly towards me, but (with the exception of my twin brother and my dad) they aren't really like me and don't understand me at all. I would certaintly say I have frien
dship at the very least, or a family connection with these people, but is there a difference between loving someone, and merely getting on well with them, or being close friends? In my mind, I'm not sure, hence why I can't say "I love my sister" etc.
I would like to ask the other ISTPs:
1) Can any of you identify with this sentiment throughout your teenage years?
2) how do you define and experience love, within your own mind? How do you show it externally?
3) How on earth do I explain this to my mother without letting on my dislike of her, and get her to stop breaching my "inner sanctum" like she did tonight?
Just to clarify, we're talking about all four of the greek meanings for love (agape, eros, philia, storge - look them up!)
2) In my mind, love (non-platonic/eros) is not a serious matter. I'm 17 and have had a few serious (to me) relationships. I find that when I meet a pretty girl, I know right away whether or not I could fall in love with that girl. (Platonically/philia) I believe that love constitutes the commitment of your emotions towards a person, that you can feel safe sharing your thoughts, feeling and actions with the person. Family doesn't automatically make someone guaranteed to receive love, it is earned, like respect.
3) I really don't know how to help you there, I just know my opinions of platonic and non-platonic love.
P.S. I'm a rather strange ISTP (I feel like) when it comes to my opinions on this subject.