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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
The concept of judging as opposed to being judgmental was hard for me to distinguish at first, but some research helped me understand this better. so I thought I'd share my hard work with y'all.:crazy: Myers and Briggs said that types with a preference for judgment show the world their preferred judging function (thinking or feeling). According to Myers, judging types like to "have matters settled."

Precaution:Words used to describe preferences in psychology do not mean the same thing as they do in everyday life
Extravert does not mean talkative or loud
Introvert does not mean shy or inhibited
Feeling does mean emotional
Judging does not mean judgmental
(This is from a PPT when we had a personal development seminar at work today)

When "judging" types make a judgment, we are making a decision/opinion of some sort. This is the "judging" preference that plays out in that we want to have matters settled on what we think/feel about something/someone. Often, I know people with Judging preferences who have an opinion about something, but don't try to force this on others. I call this "agreeing to disagree" : the idea that it's alright to have strong opinions about something and it's alright to disagree with other people's strong opinions about the same thing. :laughing:

On the other hand, being judgmental is about having an opinion and being right. Being judgmental is about using our judgment/judging preference harshly against others. The author of this one article also says: "Check yourself when you're in a debate or in disagreement with someone. Are you in reaction rather than just stating your case? Are you trying to be "right" and invested in them agreeing with you? If so, you're being judgmental."

Anyway, that was a long post, no? ;D It's actually the condensed version of all the research I did. I hope this post can be helpful to others, too. =) I was inspired to write this after a long discussion with some coworkers today who also sat through the personal development seminar we had. A lot of us have the Judging preference, so we concluded that we need to be sure to constantly check ourselves like the above quote mentioned. Another thing, a lot of us were also Feeling types (3 of us were INFJs!!!!), and we also mentioned how if we feel that someone is receiving this harsh judgment , we feel obliged to stand up for and "protect" the person against the perceived harshness. Any of y'all relate to this?
 

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yes, thank you!! so true! I hate it when I am explaining MBTI to perceivers and I start listing off people who are judgers [including myself] and they go 'oh yeah I agree you all are so judgmental" I am like [email protected]#$%^%$#@[email protected]#$% :crying:

just because we are stating what is, we are not judging!! We are trying to make sense of the situation by verbally organizing it and talking our way through it. We are trying to come to a clear consensus and conclusion.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
LOL, when one of my co-workers first took the test, she came out as INTP and she was going around asking everyone for their type. After the conversation, I momentarily forgot what she was and asked her, "Wait, you were INTJ right?" And she replied, "No , I'm not judgmental. I'm INTP."

:tongue:

Anyway, on another note -- I had a friend who was very judgmental. We were both Judging types, but the conversations would really be draining because when she had an opinion about something, she would be convinced that hers was better than other people's opinion, including mine. Instead of debating different aspects/information, she would spend a lot of time trying to prove her opinion to be right and being really harsh/critical towards people who disagreed. BOOO. :sad: I think because of this experience, I'm a personally more sensitive and more defensive (of others) when I feel like someone is being harsh in their judgments toward someone.
 

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Thanks for doing the homework! This helped :laughing:

Wait a minute.. so if somebody is not a J and they're a P? Does that mean they don't have to have their opinions settled? That seems really... wishy washy.
 

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Thanks for doing the homework! This helped :laughing:

Wait a minute.. so if somebody is not a J and they're a P? Does that mean they don't have to have their opinions settled? That seems really... wishy washy.
P's can be exceptionally judgmental as well, they can.

Edit: J just never made any flippin' sense to me. My blaring P makes it impossible to listen to reason. :<
 

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Thank you so much for the insight! I tend to confuse the two, and it doesn't help me at all:mellow: I get very confused in the end. Clearing it up makes me feel better.
 

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More information on this topic:

"Most of the weaker characteristics that are found in INFJs are due to their dominant function (Introverted iNtuition) overtaking their personality to the point that the other forces in their personality exist merely to serve the purposes of Introverted iNtuition. In such cases, an INFJ may show some or all of the following weaknesses in varying degrees:

- May be unaware (and sometimes uncaring) of how they come across to others
- May quickly dismiss input from others without really considering it
- May apply their judgment more often towards others, rather than towards themselves
- With their ability to see an issue from many sides, they may always find others at fault for any problems in their lives
- May have unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others
- May be intolerant of weaknesses in others
- May believe that they're always right
- May be obsessive and passionate about details that may be unimportant to the big picture
- May be cuttingly derisive and sarcastic towards others
- May have an intense and quick temper
- May be tense, wound up, have high blood pressure and find it difficult to relax
- May hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people
- May be wishy-washy and unsure how to act in situations that require quick decision making
- May have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others
- May see so many tangents everywhere that they can't stay focused on the bottom line or the big picture

Most of the problems described above are a result of Introverted iNtuition overtaking the INFJ's personality to the point that all of the other functions become slaves to Introverted iNtuition. A healthy personality needs to have a good balance between its dominant and auxiliary functions. For an INFJ, the dominant Introverted iNtuition needs to be well-supported by the auxiliary Extraverted Feeling function. If Extraverted Feeling exists only to support the desires of Introverted iNtuition, then neither function is being used to its potential.

To grow as an individual, the INFJ needs to focus on applying their judgment to things only after they have gone through their intuition. In other words, the INFJ needs to consciously try not to use their judgment to dismiss ideas prematurely. Rather, they should use their judgment against their own ideas. One cannot effectively judge something that they don't understand. The INFJ needs to take things entirely into their intuition in order to understand them. It may be neccesary to give your intuition enough time to work through the new information so that it can rebuild its global framework of understanding. INFJs need to focus on using their judgment not to dismiss ideas, but rather to support their intuitive framework.

An INFJ who is concerned with personal growth will pay close attention to the subject of their judgments, and their motivation for making judgments. Are they judging something external to themself, or are they judging something that they have sifted through their intuition? Is the motivation for judging something to be able to understand its usefulness in the world, or to dismiss it? -- Too often, an INFJ will judge something without properly understanding it, and with the intention of dismissing it.
Seek first to understand, then to judge."
 

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The INFP difference is here:

Most of the weaker characteristics that are found in INFPs are due to their dominant Feeling function overshadowing the rest of their personality. When the dominant function of Introverted Feeling overshadows everything else, the INFP can't use Extraverted iNtuition to take in information in a truly objective fashion. In such cases, an INFP may show some or all of the following weaknesses in varying degrees:

- May be extremely sensitive to any kind of criticism
- May perceive criticism where none was intended
- May have skewed or unrealistic ideas about reality
- May be unable to acknowledge or hear anything that goes against their personal ideas and opinions
- May blame their problems on other people, seeing themselves as victims who are treated unfairly
- May have great anger, and show this anger with rash outpourings of bad temper
- May be unaware of appropriate social behavior
- May be oblivious to their personal appearance, or to appropriate dress
- May come across as eccentric, or perhaps even generally strange to others, without being aware of it
- May be unable to see or understand anyone else's point of view
- May value their own opinions and feelings far above others
- May be unaware of how their behavior affects others
- May be oblivious to other people's need
- May feel overwhelmed with tension and stress when someone expresses disagreement with the INFP, or disapproval of the INFP
- May develop strong judgments that are difficult to unseed against people who they perceive have been oppressive or suppressive to them
- Under great stress, may obsess about details that are unimportant to the big picture of things
- Under stress, may obsessively brood over a problem repeatedly
- May have unreasonable expectations of others
- May have difficulty maintaining close relationships, due to unreasonable expectations

Its not an uncommon tendency for the INFP to look to the external world primarily for information that will support their ideas and values. However, if this tendency is given free reign, the resulting INFP personality is too self-centered to be happy or successful. Since the INFP's dominant function to their personality is Introverted Feeling, they must balance this with an auxiliary Extraverted iNtuitive function. The INFP takes in information via Extraverted iNtuition. This is also the INFP's primary way of dealing with the external world. If the INFP uses Extraverted iNtuition only to serve the purposes of Introverted Feeling, then the INFP is not using Extraversion effectively at all. As a result, the INFP does not take in enough information about the external world to have a good sense of what's going on. They see nothing but their own perspective, and deal with the world only so far as they need to in order to support their perspective. These individuals usually come across as selfish and unrealistic. Depending on how serious the problem is, they may appear to be anything from "a bit eccentric" to "way out there". Many times other people are unable to understand or relate to these people.

The INFP who is concerned with personal growth will pay close attention to their motivation for taking in information. Do they take in information to better understand a situation or concept? Or, do they take in information to support a personal idea or cause? At the moment when something is perceived, is the INFP concerned with twisting that perception to fit in with their personal values? Or is she/he concerned with absorbing the information objectively? To achieve a better understanding of the external world, the INFP should try to perceive information objectively, before fitting it into their value system. They should consciously be aware of their tendency to discard anything that doesn't agree with their values, and work towards lessening this tendency. They should try to see situations from other people's perspectives, without making personal judgments about the situations or the other people's perspectives. In general, they should work on exercising their iNtuition in a truly Extraverted sense. In other words, they should use iNtuition to take in information about the world around them for the sake of understanding the world, rather than take in information to support their own conclusions. The INFP who successfully perceives things objectively may be quite a powerful force for positive change.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Thanks for doing the homework! This helped :laughing:

Wait a minute.. so if somebody is not a J and they're a P? Does that mean they don't have to have their opinions settled? That seems really... wishy washy.
I'd have to do my homework before I can answer this question properly... :p

BUT, I think that in general, P's aren't as bothered with not having their opinions settled on something. I always get the sense that they are waiting for something extra to confirm their thoughts on something. A lot of times, at least with some xxTP's I know, they have a working opinion of something, but they also have reservations on that opinion so they "hold back" on a judgment of some sort.

And in response to another post, definitely! I think Ps can also be judgmental! Being judgmental is about being right, and about using that judgment against another person's opinion. In fact, of the perceivers I know, I feel that once they do come to make up their mind about something, they can be "judgmental" in the sense that their opinion on something won't be easily moved because what they intuit/sense from the external world has somehow validated their opinion to be right. <- feel free to correct me on this, as this is just from my observations. (Whereas for judging types, I feel that this opinion may change if new information were to be offered to allow them to think/feel differently and subsequently make an optimized opinion)
 

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I really kinda wish the authors of the MBTI could have used a different word other than "judging," like maybe..."Deciding"?...Then I'd be an INFD...weird...haha

For those who might be affected by pre-conceived definitions of words like "feeling," "judging," etc. I like this:
http://personalitycafe.com/myers-briggs-forum/9648-types-brain-pseudo-science-behind-mbti.html

Using terms like "back-brained" vs. "front-brained" and "left-brained" vs. "right-brained," is less likely to bias a person taking the test for the first time. Although, I can't say I'm really fond of the "animate" vs. "inanimate" to describe Feeling vs. Thinking. And then, people can end up with type acronyms like "BEAR" and "FEAR"...
 
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