Personality Cafe banner

1 - 2 of 2 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,005 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
The 'Kids R Fun' Mother
ENFP (Extraverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceiving)


"Whatever I enjoy-playing tag or singing in the car-I can do it with kids around. And it's totally legitimate!"

Playful and energetic, the ENFP mother finds her children to be good company and enjoys being with them. In fact, she says being with children justifies her own "being a kid again." And children say she's fun to be with—spontaneous, hearty, and imaginative.

Naturally drawn to introducing her children to the joys of life, the ENFP is something of a free spirit. She is less concerned with rules, routines, and schedules, and more inclined to give her children plenty of free time to play, explore on their own or with her, and have fun together.

Tuned in to her children, the ENFP mother enthusiastically encourages each one's individuality and unique potential through a great variety of experiences. She is also quick to identify with others' feelings and thoughts, making her an empathetic supporter of her children, not to mention her mate and many, many friends.

Tips
When dealing with her children's personal concerns, the ENFP mother needs to step back and ask herself, "Whose problem is this anyway?" and "Is this really that terrible?" To keep from over-functioning, she might enlist the help and support of a Thinking-Judging spouse or friend who can give her a more objective perspective.
Because she is naturally drawn to a variety of activities and tending to family members' emotional well-being, the ENFP mother can easily burn out. She may find it hard to relax; however, 15-minute catnaps, physical exercise, and long walks can keep her energized. Four-handkerchief movies, sad books, and pouring out her heart to a close friend can help her release her emotional stress.


Strengths
Playfulness. The ENFP mother provides her children with delightful companionship. Comfortable playing at their level, she may enjoy dancing on the table, jumping rope in the house, or doing somersaults in the swimming pool. She is equally happy "hanging out," watching a movie, or window shopping, as long as everyone is having fun together.
Helping a child identify and cultivate his or her gifts. Perceptive and people-smart, the ENFP mother helps her children recognize their talents. Enthusiastically, she helps each one develop his or her unique potential—she provides experiences and opportunities that expand a child's interests and offers her ongoing encouragement and support.
Sensitivity and empathy. The ENFP mother is aware of her children—what they're feeling and what's going on in their lives. Drawn to the pleasures of conversation and adept at heart-to-heart talks, she listens to them empathetically without judging.
Flexibility. Despite the confusion of a busy, fast-paced lifestyle and concurrent family activities, the ENFP mother can usually stay calm and go with the flow. She is rarely flustered by a change of plans, a spilled glass of milk, or last-minute requests.


Struggles
Maintaining emotional boundaries. When one of her children is having a difficult time, the ENFP mother may struggle to maintain a helpful emotional distance. She may over-identify with a child's concerns, aching with his or her every hurt, exaggerating its importance, and ultimately needing reassurance from the child that he or she will be okay.
Details. The ENFP mother struggles with the details, organization, and routines of day-to-day living. Being on time, remembering permission slips, regular mealtimes, and laundry can drive her to distraction. She may let mundane chores turn into mini-crises, because she enjoys the "rush."
Firmness. Worried about making a bad decision or taking a wrong course of action, the ENFP mother may find it difficult to be objective, decisive, and firm-minded, when appropriate. Teenagers especially may find her indulgent and inconsistent.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
432 Posts
This description is quite accurate in portraying my mom.

She divorced my dad (tried to leave him for someone else), who was an ISTJ and did all the cooking, cleaning, and rule-making.
Our house was always a mess.

She was broke a lot of the time (and still is) because she went out to eat and went shopping entirely too much. She says that she doesn't "know how else to have fun".

Although I didn't often seek my mom's advice, she was the one who would empathize with me when something went wrong.
We had some brutal fights during my teenage years, though! She'd end up calling my ISTJ dad to come over and break it up.

I still try to avoid arguing with my mom at all costs.
She has no concept of logic whatsoever; it's all about how things make her FEEL.
 
1 - 2 of 2 Posts
Top