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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So you may find my blog title a bit disconscerting, I'm fine with that. In the end, this is something that is a bit more...spiritual and odd than anything I've done so far. And in the end, you all can think what you will of it as some sort of a warning, I'm not going to respond to people trying to preach words of whatever God's you pray to, simply because I've done enough praying to the Christian God in the past to where I realize he doesn't exist as advertised.

So onto the meat and bones; first a bit of backstory on this; I've always had odd dreams, and since as far back as i can remember (meaning about 10 or 11 years old), I have been followed by crows. I don't understand why this is, I really don't, but most of my dreams are symbolic, yet I have had full-blown-predictions that happen verbaatum compared to what was in the dream (Ex. A few days ago my friend brought up an idea about some Raptor Jesus crazy plot idea and talking about Kierkegaard with a time machine, yet I had specific memory of everything in that never-before-had conversation, word for was creepy).

So...I've been feeling a bit neglected by what some of my pagan/neopagan/whatever you call them friends call my "Totem Animal" the crows that tend to follow me, perch outside my window every morning, perch on my car often enough where I wonder if they are keeping tabs on me or not. But yeah...they kinda haven't been "vocal" for the last week. And for someone who is used to the sound of a crow pecking at/cawing at their window every morning...that's a bit disconcerting, it makes me feel like something bad is about to drop on me, things have changed from the scheduled pattern and held as changing from the pattern.

Also, there are my dreams. The last dream I had featured a familiar figure to my dreams; a woman clad in black Victorian dress, wearing an ankh and pointing with a single crow perched on her left shoulder (yes, it's a bit of a pattern, I know). She has appeared in a few of my friends' dreams as well...exact same description and everything, save the crow (which is an added feature to mine)...mind you I know not a single woman who dresses like that, and nor do I feel I ever will. But the content of the dreams was this: My best friend (of whom my last blog was about) was with a woman, holding her tightly and looking as if they were in love (see also, last blog entry). The sky was black with crows, and they were flying north, Bemidji MN, where I (at the time of the dream had not learned of this yet) Have been accepted to go to college for my Bachelor's in English while pursuing a Masters for English to teach at college level. Now...the odd thing is that they were flying to the woman...who looked very pissed off, staring in a way in which you'd expect to have things hurled at you if you were stared at by a woman. Then...I woke up before anything else could happen. This is an odd dream, I know...but the one before this that featured her has basically came true in some fashion (personal change/growth followed by some emotional desert and tribulation).

Anyway...I've spent most of the night thinking about the crows...and trying to figure out what kind of place my dreams have had in all of this craziness that's going on around me. It just seems too odd for most, but if you have any non-traditional spirituality based on experience (I've been in trance states of "possession" in presence of people who can attest it was not "me", for various reasons, and also seen ghosts), maybe you'd have something to chime in...or not, I dunno...I just feel like saying something.
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