[Nearsification]

I bent my life on understanding. I want to understand everything and need too or else it will eat me alive. But I lack the ability to understand the minds of INFJs. They confuse me and always defeat me. No matter how hard I try they somehow seem to change my view every minute. Its interesting yet annoying. I can't understand an INFJ. They always defeat me. How does one understand an INFJ? They always seem to just pretty much delete every form of understanding I ever created.

 

[CuritadeRana]

We weren't created to be understood....only to love and be loved. It's one of the greatest mysteries of life:wink:

 

[blackandindie]

In order to do that, you would have to be able to decode Ni. And based on personal stimuli from person to person.. that would be quite a daunting task. Just understand, that we have the best of intentions on anything we do, and we love you.

 

[AllintheMind11]

It's no use. You'll never understand the INFJ. We don't even understand ourselves. We are quite the complex individuals all right.

But as for "defeating" you and changing your views. Couldn't you say that's a good thing? You saw something one way, but learned what you really wanted. I am always WANTING someone to defeat me in a debate. I'm not trying to be arrogant. I'm saying...I want to know the truth, and I want to know what's right.

You say you want to understand everything. Well, you learn a little more everyday, but one day you'll have a strong belief and tomorrow it could change just like that. Be proud of your open mind.

Also, I'm sure you have somethings could teach us just as well as we teach you.

 

[AirMarionette]

I've humbly accepted that INFJs are indecipherable creatures on crack.

 

[entropy]

i've humbly accepted that infjs are indecipherable creatures on crack.

omg this is all my fault.

 

[Werewolfen]

I copied this from INFJ.com , it is interesting and fits into this thread >

INFJs possess a "Chart the Course" interaction style pattern. This suits their dominant function of introverted iNtuition quite appropriately, because INFJs are driven to ANTICIPATE.​

The Chart-the-Course theme is about having a course of action to follow. People of this style focus on knowing what to do and keeping themselves, the group, or the project on track. They prefer to enter a situation having an idea of what is to happen. They identify a process to accomplish a goal and have a somewhat contained tension as they work to create and monitor a plan. The aim is not the plan itself, but to use it as a guide to move things along toward the goal. Their informed and deliberate decisions are based on analyzing, outlining, conceptualizing or foreseeing what needs to be done.​

INFJs are more task-focused than people-focused. They like to take themselves "out" of a system so they can get a better look at what's going on. They become stressed when they don't know what is likely to happen. In stressful circumstances, they tend to disconnect and withdraw in order to think things through and put their introverted iNtuition to work on perceiving a solution.​

INFJs have the belief that IT'S WORTH THE EFFORT TO THINK AHEAD TO REACH THE GOAL. A good image for them is a telescope, representing their need to look ahead.​

It's useful to point out that this is not what you might want to do, or think you should do, but what you naturally and automatically do, without thinking very consciously about it.​

 

[Icarus]

I think its the recursive understand, each understanding leads to another understanding ...
Its a theory any ways lol:laughing:

 

[MoonLight]

Doesn't that make us far more interesting?! :tongue:

I think it is possible to understand parts of us but I doubt we can be "figured out" in every way.

 

[UncertainSomething]

Paradoxical certainty...there, easy :laughing:

 

[Female INFJ]

I bent my life on understanding. I want to understand everything and need too or else it will eat me alive. But I lack the ability to understand the minds of INFJs. They confuse me and always defeat me. No matter how hard I try they somehow seem to change my view every minute. Its interesting yet annoying. I can't understand an INFJ. They always defeat me. How does one understand an INFJ? They always seem to just pretty much delete every form of understanding I ever created.

Nirvana - i see your post as neither a compliment, or an insult. you see it is not about winning or losing, it is about development, sure if you like the understanding of INFJs then go with it - but your opinions are valuable also, and don't discount them because something more exciting seems to have come along your input is likely needed also. no one is aware or understands 'everything', although it is a good aspiration. try to focus on somethings that you excel at - and you'll be defeating some INFJs for sure, if that is your desire. sometimes people scatter their thoughts too thinly and cannot focus well. there are many facets and ways to look at everything - well if i were your INFJ friend i would focus more on what you think and bring that out - i would not be into defeating you; if that makes any sense.

 

[Linus]

This reminds me of a thread(s) I saw a few weeks ago here.. It seems when some people meet other people they try to figure out what they want, so they can act that way when they meet them. But when you meet an INFJ, their focus shifts to you (or the group).. so they can figure you out.. Then all you're left with is this blank INFJ you can't read..There's nothing to work off from, for you, because the INFJ has cleared and opened up and is inviting to see you exactly the way you are.

It's an interesting phenomenon because I've found in my experiences a lot of people project their ideas on to me. If they have particular issues, they can see me as a way to deal with it.. as if they are reliving their horrible memories or whatever it is, even though in reality nothing is going on. It's like I'm some kind of mirror or pool of clear water :laughing:

 

[Karot]

Why would someone not be able to see that the person has cleared and opened up and is inviting to see you exactly the way you are?
I have to admit it's hard, especially if you don't expect it.

The mind is constantly evoluating, changing and adapting to its surroundings and its own thoughts.
It is only limited by its own imagination, which "embraces the entire world". (Einstein)

I don't believe you can truly grasp anybody's mind, and thinking you do seems a very dangerous thing to me.

 

[Humilis Curator]

INFJs are perfectly understandable, you just have to spend enough time and want to understand us enough. It may take some time but if you want to enough you will eventually begin to understand that person, but I doubt you will be able to understand us all by just understanding one that is for everyone though. INFJs are said to be the most deep and most complicated but at the same time one the most friendly. The key is to get us to talk instead of us getting you to talk but be gentle about it because if you are not we will clam up. Also, we are not very predictable, you have to keep your wits about you when handling us, you cannot expect us to always be the same exact person, yeah we will be the same CORE person but we are always changing and always discovering new things.

In short, you just have to want to understand us enough and be prepared for it taking some time and be open minded and understanding about it and us AND patient.

 

[DasPhillipBrau]

In order to do that, you would have to be able to decode Ni. And based on personal stimuli from person to person.. that would be quite a daunting task. Just understand, that we have the best of intentions on anything we do, and we love you.

we have the best intention, but the people will always try to hurt us more :sad:

 

[Blue Butterfly]

Not understanding an INFJ is what makes them so lovable. I love the way they are a puzzle what is difficult to understand. I would not have an interest in someone that I could figure out. Uniqueness is very attractive.

 

[Peter]

I bent my life on understanding. I want to understand everything and need too or else it will eat me alive. But I lack the ability to understand the minds of INFJs. They confuse me and always defeat me. No matter how hard I try they somehow seem to change my view every minute. Its interesting yet annoying. I can't understand an INFJ. They always defeat me. How does one understand an INFJ? They always seem to just pretty much delete every form of understanding I ever created.

Fake wrong bodylanguage while you´re talking with an INFJ and they'll get as confused as you are.

With faking wrong bodylanguage I mean for example: you show certainty when you´re not sure and uncertainty when you are sure. It takes some practice :happy:

 

[Nearsification]

I've humbly accepted that INFJs are indecipherable creatures on crack.

Gah Impossible! They must be understandable!

I copied this from INFJ.com , it is interesting and fits into this thread >

INFJs possess a "Chart the Course" interaction style pattern. This suits their dominant function of introverted iNtuition quite appropriately, because INFJs are driven to ANTICIPATE.​

The Chart-the-Course theme is about having a course of action to follow. People of this style focus on knowing what to do and keeping themselves, the group, or the project on track. They prefer to enter a situation having an idea of what is to happen. They identify a process to accomplish a goal and have a somewhat contained tension as they work to create and monitor a plan. The aim is not the plan itself, but to use it as a guide to move things along toward the goal. Their informed and deliberate decisions are based on analyzing, outlining, conceptualizing or foreseeing what needs to be done.​

INFJs are more task-focused than people-focused. They like to take themselves "out" of a system so they can get a better look at what's going on. They become stressed when they don't know what is likely to happen. In stressful circumstances, they tend to disconnect and withdraw in order to think things through and put their introverted iNtuition to work on perceiving a solution.​

INFJs have the belief that IT'S WORTH THE EFFORT TO THINK AHEAD TO REACH THE GOAL. A good image for them is a telescope, representing their need to look ahead.​

It's useful to point out that this is not what you might want to do, or think you should do, but what you naturally and automatically do, without thinking very consciously about it.​

That reminds me of myself

Nirvana - i see your post as neither a compliment, or an insult. you see it is not about winning or losing, it is about development, sure if you like the understanding of INFJs then go with it - but your opinions are valuable also, and don't discount them because something more exciting seems to have come along your input is likely needed also. no one is aware or understands 'everything', although it is a good aspiration. try to focus on somethings that you excel at - and you'll be defeating some INFJs for sure, if that is your desire. sometimes people scatter their thoughts too thinly and cannot focus well. there are many facets and ways to look at everything - well if i were your INFJ friend i would focus more on what you think and bring that out - i would not be into defeating you; if that makes any sense.

That sounds fairly similar to a defeat.

I don't believe you can truly grasp anybody's mind, and thinking you do seems a very dangerous thing to me.

But I can get the basic outline. And I defy you to say I cannot.

INFJs are perfectly understandable, you just have to spend enough time and want to understand us enough. It may take some time but if you want to enough you will eventually begin to understand that person, but I doubt you will be able to understand us all by just understanding one that is for everyone though. INFJs are said to be the most deep and most complicated but at the same time one the most friendly. The key is to get us to talk instead of us getting you to talk but be gentle about it because if you are not we will clam up. Also, we are not very predictable, you have to keep your wits about you when handling us, you cannot expect us to always be the same exact person, yeah we will be the same CORE person but we are always changing and always discovering new things.

In short, you just have to want to understand us enough and be prepared for it taking some time and be open minded and understanding about it and us AND patient.

How long do I have to be patient?

Fake wrong bodylanguage while you´re talking with an INFJ and they'll get as confused as you are.

With faking wrong bodylanguage I mean for example: you show certainty when you´re not sure and uncertainty when you are sure. It takes some practice :happy:

Hehe...New experiment is in order.

 

[Karot]

But I can get the basic outline. And I defy you to say I cannot.

Oh no, you can, but you can never be quite shure when, because there are some very good actors out there.

 

[AirMarionette]

Gah Impossible! They must be understandable!

Well, of course they are (to a certain extent). I was mostly joking; putting people in a box of incomprehensibility only begets confusion...