Dearly beloved, do you find your natural charm surprising you?
Yes, I know: when someone thinks ISTP, "charming" is not the first word that comes to mind. Personally, when I think of "charming", the type I think of first is ESTP.
Our ESTP brethren are indeed very charming and charismatic; I believe Se is at the center of this, and ESTPs are masters of the Se. But, what I'd like to propose is that ISTPs can also tap into this source of natural charm, and, tempered with the dominant Ti, can be slightly more subtle.
I've come across this phenomenon in myself. Some background: in my family, I am the youngest. My INTJ brother is the long suffering middle child (you know the type), and while we are great friends, we've always had this sort of silent competition between us.
Well, my brother thinks that I am everybody's favorite. Everyone knows that I'm my ISTP dad's favorite. (Surprised? I wasn't.) There is also obvious favoritism from many other family members, family friends and acquaintances.
I never knew what to make of this...after all, it's not like I was trying. So I just ignored this, wrote it off as being the youngest or some such nonsense.
But, as we grew older and expanded our social horizons, I began to notice a trend:
Our school counselor bent over backwards, helping me get scholarships, while my brother had no such help.
At work, I would openly flaunt rules (such as dress code, etc.) and make dry, somewhat critical, remarks about policy, and was never reprimanded.
At college, I openly made fun of a teacher who I thought were talking crap, and she loved me; while, a friend of mine, who shared many of my opinions but kept her mouth shut, was disliked by said teacher, and was even given a bad grade on a paper for having opposing views.
I don't know if I do this subconsciously or what, but I've realized that I can be subtly charming the people around me. And if I do this intentionally, I also noticed how I can subtly manipulate a situation or a conversation in the direction I want, to my advantage.
This relatively harmless manipulation is a little disturbing to me; it feels like deception.
So, long post aside...do you find that you have your own hidden source of charm? And do you have similar situations like I described above.
Yes, I know: when someone thinks ISTP, "charming" is not the first word that comes to mind. Personally, when I think of "charming", the type I think of first is ESTP.
Our ESTP brethren are indeed very charming and charismatic; I believe Se is at the center of this, and ESTPs are masters of the Se. But, what I'd like to propose is that ISTPs can also tap into this source of natural charm, and, tempered with the dominant Ti, can be slightly more subtle.
I've come across this phenomenon in myself. Some background: in my family, I am the youngest. My INTJ brother is the long suffering middle child (you know the type), and while we are great friends, we've always had this sort of silent competition between us.
Well, my brother thinks that I am everybody's favorite. Everyone knows that I'm my ISTP dad's favorite. (Surprised? I wasn't.) There is also obvious favoritism from many other family members, family friends and acquaintances.
I never knew what to make of this...after all, it's not like I was trying. So I just ignored this, wrote it off as being the youngest or some such nonsense.
But, as we grew older and expanded our social horizons, I began to notice a trend:
Our school counselor bent over backwards, helping me get scholarships, while my brother had no such help.
At work, I would openly flaunt rules (such as dress code, etc.) and make dry, somewhat critical, remarks about policy, and was never reprimanded.
At college, I openly made fun of a teacher who I thought were talking crap, and she loved me; while, a friend of mine, who shared many of my opinions but kept her mouth shut, was disliked by said teacher, and was even given a bad grade on a paper for having opposing views.
I don't know if I do this subconsciously or what, but I've realized that I can be subtly charming the people around me. And if I do this intentionally, I also noticed how I can subtly manipulate a situation or a conversation in the direction I want, to my advantage.
This relatively harmless manipulation is a little disturbing to me; it feels like deception.
So, long post aside...do you find that you have your own hidden source of charm? And do you have similar situations like I described above.