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Aloha!
So, I was thinking about online relationships earlier today, serious hetero LDRs specifically, and it occurred to me that a lot of the time, it's the guy that goes to the gal when they meet up irl. Obviously, this tends to be for an issue of safety and whatnot for the gal, but I was curious about something.
Once the meetings are done, things are going good, and the final move happens so the happy couple can finally be together irl whenever they wish instead of just special visits, is it still the guy that's the one most likely to do the moving? If so, why is this? Why is it up to him to get a new job, new place to stay, etc?
And, for you ladies out there, if you were/are in an online relationship, and it reached this same stage where you and your partner were ready to close the distance (though not necessarily live together in the same place, just like, in the same town or whatever), would you be willing to be the one to move? Or would you be more inclined to have him do the moving?
This can also be applied to you guys out there too. Would you be more willing to make the move or would you prefer the gal to make the move? And which role seems more common to you?
I guess what got me thinking of this is that a couple friends of mine first met online, have met irl, each took turns visiting each other, and have since become engaged to be married this summer, and it's the gal that's moving to be with the guy, which caught my attention because it's kinda different. Whether reading about relationships here on PerC or having had experiences elsewhere, it just seems like a rare turn of events.
Anyway, thoughts?
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Personally, I'm not in a relationship right now (irl or online), but I would hope that the move would be made based on other factors, such as whichever person is most available to make the move (i.e. maybe one person owns a house or land that ties them to an area and the other doesn't, or one has a really good paying job, or one has a job that can more easily transfer to a new area... stuff like that).
I've been in an online relationship before that extended into rl, and I was always the one to visit. I didn't really mind much, for a variety of reasons, but now I'm sort of settled down and have some ties to where I live so should I ever find myself in one of these types of relationships again, I wonder how likely it might be that my SO might make the move should it go that far to being something more permanent or whatever (I'd still be willing to make the initial visits if necessary n all that).
Can't help it that I'm future oriented. I have Ni!
P
So, I was thinking about online relationships earlier today, serious hetero LDRs specifically, and it occurred to me that a lot of the time, it's the guy that goes to the gal when they meet up irl. Obviously, this tends to be for an issue of safety and whatnot for the gal, but I was curious about something.
Once the meetings are done, things are going good, and the final move happens so the happy couple can finally be together irl whenever they wish instead of just special visits, is it still the guy that's the one most likely to do the moving? If so, why is this? Why is it up to him to get a new job, new place to stay, etc?
And, for you ladies out there, if you were/are in an online relationship, and it reached this same stage where you and your partner were ready to close the distance (though not necessarily live together in the same place, just like, in the same town or whatever), would you be willing to be the one to move? Or would you be more inclined to have him do the moving?
This can also be applied to you guys out there too. Would you be more willing to make the move or would you prefer the gal to make the move? And which role seems more common to you?
I guess what got me thinking of this is that a couple friends of mine first met online, have met irl, each took turns visiting each other, and have since become engaged to be married this summer, and it's the gal that's moving to be with the guy, which caught my attention because it's kinda different. Whether reading about relationships here on PerC or having had experiences elsewhere, it just seems like a rare turn of events.
Anyway, thoughts?
-----
Personally, I'm not in a relationship right now (irl or online), but I would hope that the move would be made based on other factors, such as whichever person is most available to make the move (i.e. maybe one person owns a house or land that ties them to an area and the other doesn't, or one has a really good paying job, or one has a job that can more easily transfer to a new area... stuff like that).
I've been in an online relationship before that extended into rl, and I was always the one to visit. I didn't really mind much, for a variety of reasons, but now I'm sort of settled down and have some ties to where I live so should I ever find myself in one of these types of relationships again, I wonder how likely it might be that my SO might make the move should it go that far to being something more permanent or whatever (I'd still be willing to make the initial visits if necessary n all that).
Can't help it that I'm future oriented. I have Ni!