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I drive a blue tricycle with a gold bell.
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The PerChronicler
Edition 10 - Wednesday July 8, 2020 -

Important disclaimer
The opinions and views expressed in The PerChronicler are those of a deranged ENTP editor and members of the community. They may not reflect the views of Personalitycafe itself, or the views of the moderators (who are absolutely not lizard people) or of VerticalScope, or the demanding opinions of the otters (who despite spending so much time in water don't have blubber and rely on fur to keep them warm...dumb otters). It's also not true that you can buy off the editor, probably.

Thread of the week
I think a lot of us can relate to wanting to be a cat. Just lying around all day and demanding food whenever we get hungry, biting our owners if they take too long and randomly knocking stuff to the ground sounds like the dream life. There's some cute cat gifs in the thread as well, so check it out!

Video of the week
This week's video of the week is a live performance of the song Baba Yetu, composed by Christopher Tin as the theme song for Civilization IV. It's the first piece of video game music to be nominated and win a Grammy Award.

Ban of the week
This week's ban of the week goes to CatWrangler, as it became obvious her questions about MBTI only had one purpose: to better train her army of 121 Sphynx cats to mildly annoy ISTJs. Her motives are as of yet unknown and she didn't respond to our requests for an interview.

Mod of the week
This week's mod award goes to @Cherry for notifying the proper authorities when encountering a dimensional rift in time and space that was littering a bunch of dark matter and candy wrappers all over the place. Remember folks, don't play around with dimensional rifts, not even when a very tasty apple pie falls out. Just keep your distance and call your local dimensional rift clearing agency.

An ENTP Interviews Herself
By Polexia

So, Poxy. Since you just returned to Personality Cafe after being largely absent since 2017. Daleks thought it would be great if you could just have a quick chat with yourself. So what have you been up to?
Well, Polexia. I´m pretty sure you have an idea of what we've been up to. But 3 years would be too much to recap. I guess we should keep it simple. So, I just moved back in May. I live with 5 other adults and our place is never boring. Like this past Tuesday one of my roomies decided to put on a Stormtrooper outfit to get into a “cleaning zone” so he could clean the kitchen. That was pretty hilarious. Last Friday I came home to a party. And when I say party I don’t mean the kind where people are getting their drink on. They were getting their yoga, massages and nature documentaries on. So, what I came home to were 12 half-naked adults watching Netflix giving each other massages.

Ok, how did you respond to that?
Well, I had just been at a party and was slightly drunk. So I got a beer and sat on the couch which was not being used and asked them what they were doing.

What did they say?
Well, one of my roomies looked at me and wanted to make sure I knew that this wasn’t a sex party. Which I already knew. They’ve had a few of these since I moved in.

Did you move in for these parties?
Polexia! You know me better than that. I didn’t even know that this kind of shit was gonna happen here. But it’s interesting to be an outlier in this setting. Like entering an absurd reality, I didn’t even knew existed. I’ve come to think of myself like something of an anthropologist. It’s a rare opportunity to study their routines, behaviors and such. And you know I’m a sucker for behavior. Its been an interesting journey so far.

I'm kind of hesitant about asking you personal questions now Poxy, but if you were to disclose something personal. Could you give us a sneak peak into anything?
Well, I know bowl movements and toilet breaks are in the wind. Honestly Polexia, will it ever stop being a thing people care about?

How often do you go to the bathroom?
Well, I don’t really keep count. I pee a lot. Cause I tend to be pretty good at staying hydrated. Lol, although yesterday I was dehydrated and had low blood sugar and had an unfortunate meeting with the floor of my bedroom.

Um, wut?
I was in the kitchen being offered banana pancakes by one of my roomies. But the world started getting a bit dark and tunnelled, so I walked back to my room so she wouldn’t be freaked out if I fainted. I had barely gotten the door closed when I went down.
But back to the bathroom thing though. Luckily we have 3 bathrooms. So getting to the bathroom in time is never an issue even if I sometimes have to walk all the way over to the one on the far side of the apartment. Id estimate I have about 10 bathroom breaks during the day.

How often do you poop Poxy?
Well, I do have a thing about being constipated a lot, but when I’m not it’s like clockwork really. Especially during the work week. I usually have to go poopoo around 10-11 am. Being a major caffeine addict helps. So far it’s never really abnormal in texture, size and such. I am lactose intolerant though. For years I was pretty stubborn on not caring about that. Which I always paid for in sweat, pain, and tears. I do take it pretty seriously now though. Cause honestly, products with lactose really aren’t worth it.

I wanna give you a mental exercise to see how you would solve it: Poxy, if you got the rare chance to have a threesome with you, yourself and a third person of your choice. How would that play out?

Is this a test of my sexual-preferences or of my ENTPness? Polexia, say you and I and a third person of our choice were to have a threesome. This is what I think would happen.

We would agree to have a threesome; we would find the third person. Ok. And we would be super excited about the idea. Then we would find a place and a time. But unless it were to happen while we were at the height of our excitement for this idea. We would probably just end up talking and then running up more ideas and then we would be like “HEY there are two of us! How fucking cool is that?” and then we would likely try to see as many people as possible and chase ideas and fun until the poor guy was nothing but a faint memory.

Yeah, you are onto something there Poxy. Any last words before we wrap it up?
I'm pretty excited about being back at PerC. So, I guess I’ll be seeing people around.

ENTP, 387
3,317 Posts
Aw. Didn’t know you posted it already :p

Also @Jaune there is something in here for you. Although, I left out my puke story which happens right before this was posted

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