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I generally get along with most people but I can't seem to find that perfect person.
I have a ENFJ boyfriend and we don't seem to be getting along.
Could you use this thread to put down all your thoughts about relationships with ENTPs and what they need out of a relationship?
 

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bitsilly you have morphed into an ENFP.

I have an ENFJ husband. He irritates the hell out of me sometimes. Sometimes he's amazing.

Personality typology can explain to an extent why you get on or don't get on, but only to an extent. It says nothing of personal values, ideology, physical attraction or circumstance. So you might just not be compatible. If you are though, there's no reason why you can't have a good relationship. It's also the case that no relationship in the world has ever been all good all the time. Even overall good ones can be seriously hard work sometimes.

Common flashpoints for the NFJ/NTP relationship:
T person makes a comment about something random, thinking out loud: F person takes it personally.
F person drops hints/behaves passive-aggressive to get something: T person fails to notice.
Sometimes NFJ person makes an assumption about something not even said, fails to consider that there may be more than one possibility in the mix as they are ALWAYS RIGHT, and behaves passive-aggressive and the NTP has no idea what is going on.
NFJ is upset by something NTP has done, but says nothing as hates conflict, and it festers for years, until it bursts out into something unfeasibly poisnonous. (this is my ENFJ b/f to her INTP husband, freaking out, going wild and having an affair after 17 years of marriage, ostensibly because he bought her flowers from a garage rather than a florist on valentines day. It wasn't about the flowers at all, of course, it was about the job offer he accepted 15 years before which utterly destroyed her life plans and about which she said nothing at the time.......)

This is the NTP's viewpoint. From the NFJ perspective:
NTP can be argumentative and to clever for themselves and look stupid, and never apologise.
NTP can be be nasty, uncaring and hurtful, and never apologise.
NTP never gives the emotional closeness NFJ craves, and they always feel a teeny bit insecure.
NTP reacts to truly beautiful romantic gesture with a glance, and "have you put that shelf up in the utility yet, hmm?"

There's loads more, I'm sure.

Your actual question about ENTPs....well, what do you want? Freedom to make your own choices and an intellectual mate are usually high on the list for ENTP.
 

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Your actual question about ENTPs....well, what do you want? Freedom to make your own choices and an intellectual mate are usually high on the list for ENTP.
I have read that that's what ENTPs want from several postings. Though my next question is "What defines intellectual mate" to you? Do you mean someone that is a more thinking type... so an NT or ST, or someone who is an N? Point being that an NF is going to be more sensitive than an NT, but they both approach the world in the same manner and have good instincts.

If I ever get asked what I desire in a mate, I just will simply say something like "Someone who can see the depth of the world."


Random thought of realization that I've know had.... I have rarely (if ever) been told by an ST type that I am "smart", however, I have been told I am smart by several NT types. Occasionally I will hear this SFs.... but I don't ever feel like the S types ever really appreciate it -- sometimes it seems they just end up hating me for it.
 

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Intellectual mate: Usually this means someone who is N. Of course S types are as clever as the N types, but in a different way. In a way that does not match, hence not an intellectual mate.

For me, NF, NT, doesn't matter. My partner is NF but I get along very well with NTs. Regardless of levels of physical attraction, I wouldn't stay in a relationship for more than 5 minutes with someone who bored me. There are lots of people out there who do, and in life that's fine, I have close friends, STs and SFs who do bore me a bit, but that's OK, I don't have to live with them/share my soul with them.
 

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I am pretty hard to get close to. Some people may think they're close to me, when really they're not (I can think of at least one person who has said so). Except for my family, a few cousins and one of my friends, I consider every person in my life replaceable.

As far as matches go, I need someone who I don't have to explain every single thing to. I need my autonomy. Anyone who thinks they can change a certain part of me will be sadly disappointed. I'm kinda shallow as far as looks go. I need at least a 6/10 face and an 8/10 body. Basically it should not be hard for me to get my cock up.

Right now I have no intention of getting into a relationship. I like having sex with multiple girls at the same time. You know, keeping it causal. I don't tell them that there are others, unless they ask. None of them have asked though.
 

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Another N type for sure. NF or NT.

And also somebody that can keep an ENTP's attention. Thats important. I'm not sure I'm a fan of the INFJ/ENTP ideal pairing thing. I tend to like my shadow better for long term, INTJ's. Not to mention INFJ guys are so rare.

But yeah, I find NF guys to be quite endearing. One I know was also quite the intellectual.
 

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The very best match is probably a more mature INFJ. S types are out of the question. I think you could make it work with the other N types, but it would be difficult--there would be many compromises, and those obstacles would need to be maneuvered around rather than worked through. In the short term this sounds easier, but in the long term, the struggles you'll face with an INFJ can be mutually rewarding once they've been seen through. You've just got to be willing to keep coming back and coming back after a fight. You have to learn to be vulnerable, humble, and to admit when you're wrong. I think it may be the only dynamic among N types where both romantic partners aid each other's personal growth by growing, themselves.
 

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Never asked women what type they were. At least not up to now.

Its much easier to say what would NOT be a perfect match:

- She thinks I insulted her and maybe also her family because of comments I made sarcastically after I just could not take it anymore.
- She loves the caring type of questions/comments ("are you alright". "Can I do something for you". "I am sorry if I hurt your feelings". "How was your day honey"..).
- She has fists that most often comes from her feeling of being treated unfair and no logic in the world could change that.
- After she kept you emotionalize the whole day she cant understand when your mood suddenly change.
- When you come up with a spontaneous idea she thinks you are living in a fantasy and wants to correct you on how real rational people thinks.
- Even when you make sweet fun of her she does not understand. She thinks you are disrespecting her and demand an immediate apology.
- Everything should be planned.
- Everybody else are living examples on how YOU should do things.
- Instead of picking up on the fun philosophical discussions she becomes quiet and prefer to talk about something "less complicated".
- She hates it when you analyze her.


Ok. That was my contribution. Not very pretty as you can see:dry:
 

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Never asked women what type they were. At least not up to now.

Its much easier to say what would NOT be a perfect match:

- She thinks I insulted her and maybe also her family because of comments I made sarcastically after I just could not take it anymore.
- She loves the caring type of questions/comments ("are you alright". "Can I do something for you". "I am sorry if I hurt your feelings". "How was your day honey"..).
- She has fists that most often comes from her feeling of being treated unfair and no logic in the world could change that.
- After she kept you emotionalize the whole day she cant understand when your mood suddenly change.
- When you come up with a spontaneous idea she thinks you are living in a fantasy and wants to correct you on how real rational people thinks.
- Even when you make sweet fun of her she does not understand. She thinks you are disrespecting her and demand an immediate apology.
- Everything should be planned.
- Everybody else are living examples on how YOU should do things.
- Instead of picking up on the fun philosophical discussions she becomes quiet and prefer to talk about something "less complicated".
- She hates it when you analyze her.
Oi! ENTP candy!

- She loves the caring type of questions/comments ("are you alright". "Can I do something for you". "I am sorry if I hurt your feelings". "How was your day honey"..).
Personally, I'd like to make those kind of questions. They are a resourceful fact and I'm affectionoholic.

Even when you make sweet fun of her she does not understand. She thinks you are disrespecting her and demand an immediate apology.
- Everything should be planned.
BURN THEM, BUUUURN THEEEEM!

- Instead of picking up on the fun philosophical discussions she becomes quiet and prefer to talk about something "less complicated".
I really can't live without philosophy.

- Even when you make sweet fun of her she does not understand. She thinks you are disrespecting her and demand an immediate apology.
Eeerr.. Itt... depends... a bit. A bitty bit. You could find her mistakes humourous, and then with some abra-kadabra irrefutable logic, prove her conviction wrong. Ah, and if they deny irrefutable logic...

BURN THEM ASWELL!
 

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Oi! ENTP candy!



Personally, I'd like to make those kind of questions. They are a resourceful fact and I'm affectionoholic.



BURN THEM, BUUUURN THEEEEM!



I really can't live without philosophy.



Eeerr.. Itt... depends... a bit. A bitty bit. You could find her mistakes humourous, and then with some abra-kadabra irrefutable logic, prove her conviction wrong. Ah, and if they deny irrefutable logic...

BURN THEM ASWELL!
Yes, with compliments from the candy shop..:laughing:
 

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@ningyo- I don't agree. ISFPs and ENTPs share duality relationships which surprisingly, makes them as perfect for each other as possible.
And anyway, it all comes down to love! :tongue:
Yes and no. I like ISFPs as friends (perhaps with benefits...heheh...), but for relationships....Eh. The conversation isn't exactly sparkling, truth be told, which is absolutely necessary in the long term.
 

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Its much easier to say what would NOT be a perfect match:

- She thinks I insulted her and maybe also her family because of comments I made sarcastically after I just could not take it anymore.
- She has fits that most often comes from her feeling of being treated unfair and no logic in the world could change that.
For women, these are usually red flags in men. I notice a lot of ENTPs do these sort of things to weed out people and see how they can be ultilized. This goes too far when you bring this method into an intimate relationship though. It takes a very mature ENTP to realize that sometimes they do take things too far.

Unfortunately, I personally had to deal with this behavior while I was very ill. My ENTP was also unhealthy himself. I'm still a firm believer in the healthy ENTP-INTJ connection though. It is quite awesome when both parties are willing to make it work.
 

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Never asked women what type they were. At least not up to now.

Its much easier to say what would NOT be a perfect match:

- She thinks I insulted her and maybe also her family because of comments I made sarcastically after I just could not take it anymore.
- She loves the caring type of questions/comments ("are you alright". "Can I do something for you". "I am sorry if I hurt your feelings". "How was your day honey"..).
- She has fists that most often comes from her feeling of being treated unfair and no logic in the world could change that.
- After she kept you emotionalize the whole day she cant understand when your mood suddenly change.
- When you come up with a spontaneous idea she thinks you are living in a fantasy and wants to correct you on how real rational people thinks.
- Even when you make sweet fun of her she does not understand. She thinks you are disrespecting her and demand an immediate apology.
- Everything should be planned.
- Everybody else are living examples on how YOU should do things.
- Instead of picking up on the fun philosophical discussions she becomes quiet and prefer to talk about something "less complicated".
- She hates it when you analyze her.


Ok. That was my contribution. Not very pretty as you can see:dry:
By the look of it, you should not date a J. A SJ in all probability.
 
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