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mafia mod
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13,316 Posts
Um, Hello.
I'd like to purchase a persian tub for a wedding, it's a special occasion and all.
We thought it'd be cool to sacrifice someone for a bit of familial entertainment.

How soon can I have one delivered and can I get a quoted cost plus shipping?

Thank you

A single..hmm.Why not a double?. You can sacrifice a very large person and have the entertainment last longer.
 

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Let me do a bit of research before investing in this product. Found a warning label.

Warning: We are not responsible for any social repercussions the product might cause for yourself.
 

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mafia mod
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13,316 Posts
To @MsBossyPants and @Thomas60
RE. Persian tub order

Good Evening Colleagues

I need a price quote and a lead time for a double, shipping to Australia. Its a wedding so perhaps we can throw in Monograming at no cost.

Let me know

Siggy at Internet Sales
 
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To @MsBossyPants and @Thomas60
RE. Persian tub order

Good Evening Colleagues

I need a price quote and a lead time for a double, shipping to Australia. Its a wedding so perhaps we can throw in Monograming at no cost.

Let me know

Siggy at Internet Sales
Good Evening Siggy

Please see quote attached.
Note due to increased seasonal demand fluctuations, a made-to-order charge on this model will apply between Dec 1 2017 - Mar 1 2018.
We can throw in the monogramming. I'm sure marketing would authorize a flower gift to their charge card for Weddings.

Regards,
Thomas at Billing and Operations
Sales Quote 150008.JPG
 

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EvilShoutyRudolph
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5,099 Posts
“And the punishment of “sitting in the tub” saw the convicted person placed in a wooden tub with only their head sticking out. The executioner would then paint the victim’s face with milk and honey. Flies would begin to swarm around the victim’s nose and eyelids. The victim was also fed regularly and fairly soon, they would virtually be swimming in their own excrement.

At which stage maggots and worms would devour their body. One victim apparently survived for 17 days — he decayed alive.”
What I plan on doing to all music.ly stars.^
 

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Chatterbox, MOTM August 2013
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10,959 Posts
To @MsBossyPants and @Thomas60
RE. Persian tub order

Good Evening Colleagues

I need a price quote and a lead time for a double, shipping to Australia. Its a wedding so perhaps we can throw in Monograming at no cost.

Let me know

Siggy at Internet Sales

Aw come on. It’s for @Wellsy and @herinb.

I say we eat the cost. Gift it to them.

I’m sure it will be a hit at the reception and they’ll get a lot of requests to know where they got it. Free marketing. It’ll open up the Australian market for us.

Wellsy’s INFP friends may be aghast at the sight of the thing, but herinb is an ENTJ. Think of all the contacts an ENTJ supernetworker like her has. Include a box of business cards with the shipment, ask that they be discretely placed near the tub. It’ll sell itself.

If they settle in Australia, we might offer herinb the Australian marketing rep position, or if they settle here, the US rep for whatever city they settle in.

Think bigger, Guys. :wink:
 

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mafia mod
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13,316 Posts
Business cards with 15% off your first order. At the very least, it will encourage browsing our fine products.
 

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Why was this stickied

Pffft
 

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You must be new around here
Jumps at the sight of a nostalgia-stricken face emerge from behind the dusty old curtain.

Notices I am in an ancient place only remembered in legend and lore. The smell of must...I hear the distant chime of twinkling laughs by children in the meadow of a time long, long ago.

Feels self conscious. This is not my place...I shall leave at once!

 

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mafia mod
Joined
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13,316 Posts
Jumps at the sight of a nostalgia-stricken face emerge from behind the dusty old curtain.

Notices I am in an ancient place only remembered in legend and lore. The smell of must...I hear the distant chime of twinkling laughs by children in the meadow of a time long, long ago.

Feels self conscious. This is not my place...I shall leave at once!


Here are some brochures before you go. We have a Valentines day special going on right now. Our double and our single classic are ready to ship with a dozen roses.
 

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Spam-I-am
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13,649 Posts
Here are some brochures before you go. We have a Valentines day special going on right now. Our double and our single classic are ready to ship with a dozen roses.
we also have a secret sex shop in the basement
pigs, goats, cows and a couple of humans
the sheep are off limits, we save those for the INTJ's
 

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A classic sketch from spitting image
 
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Why bother with the possible profit margins from filths coming out of the boat just for the sake of enterpreneurial-ship?

Why not simply force the phlebs to visit the boat show every morning at least 10 minutes and put the decree banners everywhere: "more milk and honey or go boating!". It would boost national production of both products to global market leader level while still providing enough underachiever to run the boatshow full 24/7/365.

There, efficient, effective, clean.

Now, can i milk you, honey?
 

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This thread went in a COMPLETELY different direction than expected, while still being completely plausible for ENTJs. I'm fucking dying.

Anyway. that execution? Completely inefficient. Unless it's a means of torturing for intel, then sure. But they're now useless and just need to die? Fuck it. Stab, shoot, or behead. Quick, easy clean-up, and no unnecessary resources wasted on the condemned.
 
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