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The Saddest @@ INTJ Has Given Up Hope, Trust, and Caring.

TRUE????

Has this ever happened to you?

How did you survive. . . and thrive?
 

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Plague Doctor
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I have Major Depressive Disorder and when I'm going through an episode, it can feel hopeless, I lose the ability to feel my emotions (emotional numbness), and I may be possibly a bit more paranoid (I haven't ever really noticed this last one, though to be honest; I trust who I trust but that doesn't seem to change with MDD).

How I got through it? By trying every single "trick" I could until I had to give in and accept that I needed to take medication for it. I was 25 and about to get married and I knew I had to be a better person for my life partner and later, not that there was any question, I knew I needed to be there for my daughter. It was the hardest and easiest thing I've ever done. Hard because it's difficult to admit that one can't handle it by themselves and easy because the tiniest dose had my mind clear enough to realise just how much of an idiot I was for not seeing a professional sooner.
 

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I landed in hospital last year, where I had way too much free time considering how it's possible still being alive despite someone nearly killing me, and this later led to depression and after that, anxiety. It was a horrible feeling of hopelessness and I still struggle with it.

(I function normally but struggle at times for which I take anti-anxiety meds if it's bad. They just make me sleepy but sometimes I need time to lie in bed and come up with the problems and solutions.)

The antidote is exactly what you described, feeling things to be hopeful about, caring about and trusting things again. I started working toward my goals and simultaneously decided I needed to re-engineer my life. It's been a lot of connecting to things I used to love as I was younger, and remembering how my healthy mindset operates so that I stick to those patterns. I am learning about little joys in my days like baking something.

Key to all of it is to not think big. Mortality and trust and etc are all big conceptual issues. But life is little moments, so I need to focus on those.

Mindset is very much about discipline while enjoying the moment, and slowly I dare to dream big again.
 

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I actually have a lot of questions about this because I knew an INTJ that dealt with it and didn't recover, I had to end the friendship and am still a bit shaken about it. I cared about this person but he sabotaged the hell out of himself and it boiled over to everyone that knew him. It was hella frustrating to watch someone destroy themself and you have to watch with folded hands because commenting was basically betrayal. He was completely numb and receded from normal circles into toxic extremist camps. When I noticed him receding I reached out to him and kept tabs on him. I might not be able to suggest things but I could read his state of mind pretty well based on what he said. Long story, the extremist circles narrowed his focus to these really dire, negative assertions about the world. And he couldn't shut up about them. After awhile all he would talk to me for was venting and heaving this BS onto me. It wore away at me. I tried to help him as best I could but nothing seemed to work and he would accuse me of being judgmental if I disagreed with him or pointed out that it was depressing or no good. Eventually we had a fight because I did that again, talk about his emotional state, and he got angry and said I don't support him and that he could barely consider me a friend anymore. I was shocked, I melted down. After some fruitless discussion ( he didn't want to work on anything, only that I was the problem, I was too difficult, this outcome was inevitable anyway ) I ended the friendship. He said he only felt a stab of emotion after it was done. Like was he on autopilot through the entire thing I guess? And that I abandoned him in his hour of need. I know what being abandoned feels like, I have empathy for him, but I couldn't handle what he was dishing out anymore. It was completely selfish, self destructive, I think he was genuinely blind to what I needed because it always came back to his feelings and that I was just being difficult


I read that INTJs have trouble with hope because they feel they see the future, and if their vision of the future is dire, they may find it inevitable. I saw that with him. I am more flexible like "many routes, many branching possibilities" so I could see many ways things could get better, but I couldn't get him to buy that. He just keep picking the crap routes over and over and then freaking out when it goes wrong. It took a long time but I witnessed his breaking point on that and it wasn't pretty, when strongly held beliefs crumble. He was fatalistic with me too, he had no desire of fixing things with me because it was similar to numerous other interpersonal problems he had in the past, a pattern he had no desire of fixing. He was likely to blame the problem on the other person and was blaming me for some things that seemed untrue or like self projections.

On rare occasion I suggested getting help but he was super defensive about that, saying it hurt him, and he thought he could solve it with ebooks or something. So I could no longer suggest getting help. I realize he is too afraid to look at himself (hugely avoidant and bit of a temper) to be able to help himself much, help is probably needed.

TL;DR reading whatever responses are here to see how any of you made it out alive. I think about him a lot and I don't know what could have been done differently. It has unnerved me
I have had some very interesting/great friendships with INTJs but examples like this make me afraid. When things get rough they really get rough, and painful. Sharp words and trick room situations
 

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TL;DR reading whatever responses are here to see how any of you made it out alive. I think about him a lot and I don't know what could have been done differently. It has unnerved me
don't blame you. for whatever reason, it sort of sounds like he made a decision. i don't think this is type-based so much, by the way. i think i've met people of other types who have done the same thing, although maybe they don't manifest it in quite the same ways on the detail level.

what makes better sense (maybe) is to process your loss. i mean, if a person has chosen something (and maybe here, yeah, if that person's an intj) then . . . i have met people who seemed like they had made a determined decision to deal with goodness by refusing to value it. it's almost like they see it as a way of triumphing over all the dilemmas of life. my struggle has usually been with that knowledge, seen in hindsight when i look back on those folks. i take my own values too seriously not to rage and mourn when it dawns on me that i had been wasting them.

I read that INTJs have trouble with hope because they feel they see the future, and if their vision of the future is dire, they may find it inevitable
sort of. we're all different, and i don't think your friend was a typical case. but personally and short of that kind of extremism, i wouldn't say i find it inevitable. i just find it to be a fact that this is one way of looking at things, and a fact that it is the way that i'm looking at things. being told to perk up and think differently just makes me angry. i recognize the concept of subjectivity. so, as a side-effect of that, i expect other people to recognize and treat subjectivity in the same way i do [hint: i'm not super-sure that they do :tongue:].

it might be fi. personal process to me has always been hermetic. my processes accept input, and that's where my flexibility lies: i'm open in that respect. but the process itself, i.e. what my mind does with input - no. on some level i think i don't even grok the concept of being told by some outside force not to think what i think. it outrages logic and physics, to me. my mind just goes 'i do think what i think. i don't understand why there's even a topic in this.'

so, what this leads to is . . . if i'm in a funk and i think a particular thing, that is the thing that i think. whether it's wrong or it's right doesn't matter that much. it is the thing that i think. the weird thing ( i guess) is that i don't necessarily think the thing's true. i just get very very stubborn about that hairs-breadth distinction of 'the fact that i think it is true'. and i can take input - i probably retain even stuff that i don't visibly process at once. so you have that to consider whenever you think of your friend. he registered whatever you said. you probably never did have much input into whether or when or in what way his mind processes it.

And that I abandoned him in his hour of need.
that sounds like bullshit to me. he doesn't get to play that kind of game, holding you up by the scruff of your neck and demanding you 'care' about him while rejecting you at the same time. that's a way of stacking the deck so that he always wins, right? you can't 'abandon' a person who tells you he doesn't want you.
 

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i just find it to be a fact that this is one way of looking at things, and a fact that it is the way that i'm looking at things. being told to perk up and think differently just makes me angry. i recognize the concept of subjectivity. so, as a side-effect of that, i expect other people to recognize and treat subjectivity in the same way i do [hint: i'm not super-sure that they do
].
I think this part was hard to deal with, in a normal friendship there is no reason to concern over how the other person is processing the world so long as it is working for them and they are happy. In this one, his outlook and decisions were sinking him and that made me frustrated and want to give advice because I was witnessing the train go off the tracks. But yes that was frustrating to him, because he saw it as differences in opinion, not being helpful

so, what this leads to is . . . if i'm in a funk and i think a particular thing, that is the thing that i think. whether it's wrong or it's right doesn't matter that much. it is the thing that i think. the weird thing ( i guess) is that i don't necessarily think the thing's true. i just get very very stubborn about that hairs-breadth distinction of 'the fact that i think it is true'. and i can take input - i probably retain even stuff that i don't visibly process at once. so you have that to consider whenever you think of your friend. he registered whatever you said. you probably never did have much input into whether or when or in what way his mind processes it.



that sounds like bullshit to me. he doesn't get to play that kind of game, holding you up by the scruff of your neck and demanding you 'care' about him while rejecting you at the same time. that's a way of stacking the deck so that he always wins, right? you can't 'abandon' a person who tells you he doesn't want you.

Thank you lily, that makes some sense to me. "The thing that I think" part, that was interesting. He would make very self assured statements about what was true (some fake news how world is bad in some way), but in rare moments I would hear him say that he doesn't actually believe what he is saying. That didn't make sense to me, but maybe it was like this


That last part makes me smile a bit. Haha
He might have known it

Thank you for taking the time to explain it to me and give me your perspective
 

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Discussion Starter #7
Likely, INTJ's don't have a monopoly on "going off the deep end".

I've known a fellow for many decades who "chose" to head that way despite a promising career and many opportunities for great things in life. Now works very part time and lives in a van. He calls it "on the Path to Truth". I call it "hopelessly homeless and destitute".

The "Path To Truth" think I've heard from others, too, is just a justification for lack of ambition and an opportunistic narcissistic lifestyle.
 
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I think this part was hard to deal with, in a normal friendship there is no reason to concern over how the other person is processing the world so long as it is working for them and they are happy.
i've had that experience, yeah. it tends to happen with me around infps. our visible end results are so similar that we get misled into thinking we think the same ways under the hood. and by the time we find out that's not true, we're already in halfway up to our knees and retreating is hard.


In this one, his outlook and decisions were sinking him and that made me frustrated and want to give advice because I was witnessing the train go off the tracks. But yes that was frustrating to him, because he saw it as differences in opinion, not being helpful
i think to me there would be a difference between someone whose life direction i'm losing the ability to relate to, which can happen with anybody and a lot of the time it's a pretty no-harm-no-foul thing. and a person whose opinions are becoming morally repulsive to me. repulsiveness is a more serious thing, naturally. can't tell in the case of your friend and you're not me with my outlook on life anyway. but you mentioned toxic extremism stuff, and that makes me think you had a valid revulsion all of your own all along too. so maybe in some ways or on some level he's a person you're glad to be free of yourself.

doesn't help the hurt of having had someone you cared about turn into a person you don't want to know.

He would make very self assured statements about what was true (some fake news how world is bad in some way), but in rare moments I would hear him say that he doesn't actually believe what he is saying. That didn't make sense to me, but maybe it was like this
interesting. i'll be honest; i've certainly been down some rabbit holes and dead ends of my own - gotten very committed to things that i no longer thought five years later. but i'm not sure i've ever done exactly that: maintained something as fact that i didn't believe in myself.

the thing i was talking about is a little bit different from that. it's more like, being conscious in a moment that whatever i'm seeing right then is just OF the moment. it's like if somebody drops a cannon onto your toe and then asks you if you're okay. obviously you're not. at the same time, it's equally obvious that a crushed toe is not life-threatening. so i have shroedinger's toe :laughing:. in the same moment of experience i'm both okay, but i'm not. in real life it's probably much more simple that that, like: no of course i'm not fucking okay :angry::angry::angry: but i'm going to be.

my comment was more like that second mindset. of course i'm aware i'm not going to die. BUT i'm not going to entertain that as a topic though; not while what i'm feeling is true. the future is not relevant.

it's not a great metaphor though, because the obvious thing about transient physical pain is that you know it will pass. with emotional pain and other forms of mental turmoil, the hallmark of 'turmoil' is the fact you don't know. if you did you would probably be better at keeping your balance, you know?

idk; would i embrace alt-rightdom while knowing it's not what i honestly think? don't think so. but i've certainly had times where what i think in a specific moment IS what i think. and there isn't a thing i can do about it, but it's not what i want to be thinking for the long term. under those circs the future-based intj thing means i can get caught in a struggle between two forms of authenticity that genuinely contradict one another.

i seriously hate having to live in that state, so maybe your friend just decided to pick one and then stick to it. i've done that, but i tend to pick for the longer-term thing of how i want things to be and grit my teeth through the shorter term storm. it's not always do-able though and it comes at a price. i don't have endless stamina for it. if anything i may have less stamina than most people do. it does matter to me quite a lot that i deal with what's real, so idealism alone only carries me for a short way.

the bottom line sounds to me like your friend will either straighten himself out, or not. in the meantime, people who have their heads stuck in a tunnel are HARD to deal with. they're boring as fuck, without even going to the other things. i have very limited tolerance there, so i guess i'm fairly demanding with friends. i'll put up with a certain kind of hardship for them and not grudge it at all. but others, i'm not the person they ought to count on.


Thank you for taking the time to explain it to me and give me your perspective
it's an interesting conversation. ending important connections is never easy. it deserves processing time.
 

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IME,

Those type of negative feelings would only come about when I choose to blame other factors besides myself. Easier said than done but it's true what they say when they say you are in control of your own life. Of course, there are external factors you cannot control but instead of focusing so much on what we can't control, sometimes it's best to just step back, stop freaking out about those external factors, and then hone in on the things that we actually can control. Being big picture type people, sometimes we can choose to overlook what we view as insignificant and superficial. I think those small things can all help you along to achieve big picture goals. It's like that person who just starts working out and wants to bite far more than he can chew instead of being proud of being able to lift 10 lbs for example. 10 lbs might not be 100, but it is still better than 0 or not even trying anything at all.

I stopped the whole self-pitying/victim thing. That was for when I was a teen/low 20's and all it did was making me into an unhappy and negative human. I realize that life will never meet your expectations and that's fine but I can always choose to live my life reaching my own expectations. I have the means to leave things that aren't right or toxic for me and I should choose to take more responsibility for things that I absolutely should. As humans we tend to set unrealistic expectations onto people and then deem them too stupid, illogical, distrustful, mean, hopeless, etc. This is where we go wrong. It is not about that. No one is perfect and there will be plenty of people that you come across that won't meet the expectations that you set for them.
 

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My "regular mode" is basically a mix of a crushing cynicism and stoicism. For most of the time I don't really care about much about anything (being in love is one exception, just as sharing time with true friends), but that doesn't bring me sadness either, I simply don't feel anything but a comfortable sense of control over my psyche, body and ego, which can make me stagnant, unproductive (and THAT can lead me to become sad and self-destructive).

The temporary "cure" I found for this state is simply external stimuli. I use things like music and creative projects to inspire me and "shake my character", taking me out of my comfort zone, giving me a purpose. I think anything that makes your heart beat faster is an option, but I recommend keeping it healthy (or else it can become an addiction or something even more dangerous).

In other words: Your mind torments you? That's because you are carrying it too much, it's better to go out and search for things to do. Hobbies, new objectives, new experiences. An empty mind is truly devil's workshop.
 

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The "Path To Truth" think I've heard from others, too, is just a justification for lack of ambition and an opportunistic narcissistic lifestyle.
Its contrary. Lack of ambition and opportunistic narcissistic lifestyle justifies the path of truth. The individuals truth and purpose. A few observable truths of nature is that it is always forthcoming, unwasteful and abundant. Even if the ego with hopes and wishes for itself cease, life still goes on for that individual. The path of truth is to be happy and at peace, and often it is the idea we have of ourselves that gets in the way of this.
 

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With every thing horrendous I just get better at dealing, so falling into deep feelings of hopelessness get less and less.

I cannot say thing(s) effect me as greatly once you live and survive the worst of things. Feelings of hopeless + trust take a lot for me to feel - since I have lived through the worst of my life, imo and have overcame what I thought would be a "dead end". Near death experiences, sickness, death of loved ones, loss and more losing. I am not a cynic. I have made peace with most things.
 

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I can be this way when in a Ni-Fe loop, but overall I think I'm pretty well grounded. Went through some depression as a teenager (not seeing a way out of my situation at the time), but eventually got over the worst of that.

For me, I don't really get into a "that can't happen" mentality - I might realize that it will never happen unless I'm willing to give up other things to make it happen, but "never" is a strong word for most things in this life. Things often don't happen on my set schedule, but that doesn't stop me from pursuing them (my racing is the perfect example of this).

If anything, I've managed to develop a bit of a "fighter" mentality. Even when I'm down and not "happy" I'm not about to give up, and if anything, will just stubbornly put my head down and keep on pushing. I'm sure a lot of that stems from my upbringing and just who I am as an individual, but short of a the somewhat rare Ni-Fe loops, can't say this is a big issue in my world.

Now, all that being said, I do NOT have an attitude of needing or relying on other people in my life - I might temporarily or occasionally rely on someone who's earned that level of friendship with me, but NEEDING someone else I have a strong aversion to. Some of that, again, stems from my upbringing, and a split/divorce 7 years ago solidified that "don't rely on anyone else for anything you NEED" attitude. So my loner-status got a little amplified....
 

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I apologise in advance for this post, but you did ask. Here's what an INTJ-A that's far too gone to save thinks. INTJ is a curse. People online constantly make out like it's this great desirable set of traits, but my life experience is the total opposite.

Sad is an understatement. I'm more of a 'can't stand living in this cruel hell' sort of vibe. I (normally) try not to spread this negativity around externally (made that mistake too many times), but internally, I don't even believe in my own 'passions' anymore. I feel like I don't want to live, and it isn't some 'depressive state' where I need to see a doctor (done that), it's developed into my perspective of the world. My entire existence revolves around trying to cope with the fact that I'm this "INTJ" thing; a cruel joke that doesn't even make sense. I'm utterly direct yet seemingly always misunderstood, disliked by most as some know-it-all, armchair-expert arsewipe. All my achievements are taken for granted because people just expect it, even if it's in a new hobby or interest I have literally zero experience in (not that I need validation). Constantly having my self-confidence seen as a threat because of people's own insecurities, so forever a target for others to take down a peg. Always making paradoxical claims and statements that make perfect sense to me, but to others seem like some sort of nutjob rambling, so often accused of having no internal consistency. Forever trying to solve others' life problems, but every attempt to solve my own issues either backfires because of my own inadequacy (surprise, surprise, logic doesn't work for everything), or lulls me into a false sense of hope, before shattering my dreams of a light at the end of the tunnel. I always have answers to everyone else's suggestions on how to fix my life, perhaps the cop-outs of a stubborn, arrogant person who refuses to listen. It's like eternally living in solitary confinement, for a crime I never committed, or wasn't even accused or charged of. People will open the cell door when they need my help, or just to prod me with a stick for their own enjoyment, but will then lock the door behind them once they get their needs catered to.

Yes, I've given up hope, because it is delusional wishful thinking, writing a cheque I won't ever cash. Hope does nothing but crush my soul upon realisation I'm lying to myself to save face, or to be be somewhat optimistic. I don't trust anybody, because everybody I know or loved has betrayed my trust in some respect. No loyalty, the lot of them. I'm not letting anybody in, because I wouldn't even know where to start on that one. Yet I still care a bit, and I don't understand why. I shouldn't care about people who turn up after years looking for help/advice, when all they did was leave me to fester in the gutter. I shouldn't give a crap about a stranger I just met, in need. Yet I'm always there, like some kind of mug, desperate for a momentary piece of human interaction. Maybe it's different this time...nope. I guess I genuinely like helping people where I can? Maybe it's to impress them, i dunno, there's probably some selfish reason behind it, as ever. I survive by self-isolation, plodding onwards, because I don't have any other choice. I won't top myself; I won't give this world the satisfaction, and I'm not a quitter. I could try to use my "highly valued" logic and problem solving to apply to a highly irrational & illogical world, but I already tried that way too many times. I know how that story ends. I shouldn't have ever worked on my feeling side, because now I also feel bad, as well as thinking this way. And the mind never stops, every second of every day I have to think this crap. Even my 'dreams' torment me by manifesting depictions of how my life should have been, then cruelly awaken me to realise I still exist in hell. Having imagination is really fun.

I've dealt with things by simply retreating to my own world. Typical INTJ, reclusive loner bs. People isolated me, so I did the job properly. I'm now a complete fantasist, living in my own head. Working out obsessively for those lovely endorphins that momentarily relieve my existential malaise. Making art as a distraction, & a futile attempt to try to express that I can't express with words. Learning about everything I don't need to know, sometimes to help others, but generally to win some pointless argument to prove I'm right (yet again). Wasting time, waiting for the reaper. Basically non-solutions to the problems I face, utter avoidance, fully knowing I can't or will ever possess the personality or social skills to actually function properly in society. The more I tried, the worse things seemed to get, so giving up was inevitable. I haven't had anything resembling a support network for half a life, so trying to deal with everything in typical INTJ fashion, alone, I just screwed everything up that wasn't related to logical thinking, which unfortunately, are most things in life. Yay, being INTJ is so so amazing. What a gift!

I hate being an INTJ. It's cringey when I see them postulate about how good isolation is, that it's this amazing quality to have. Even animals don't live alone, it ain't right. It just makes you develop idiosyncrasies that will further isolate you. And then time; the "great healer" cements these things, driving the nails into your precious logical coffin. And it's so "cute" that I can't read social cues; I probably didn't even realise when people actually cared or loved me in some way. I'm really spoiled with all these amazing gifts. Again, I'm sorry. Sorry for bothering you. Sorry for trying with this life. I'll slither back into my cell now, where I clearly belong :rolleyes:

PS have a wonderful day. I hope you learned something. Use me as an example of how not to be or something... :dry:
 

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Discussion Starter #15
"Infinitus"
Yes. Perhaps many INTJ's have this "elephant in the room" that we live with. Sometimes in denial of, or coping with, or reveling at having. It can be compartmentalized. IE: That's an aspect of me, but not all of me, not "me", not the "bigger me".
In another view, INTJ . . . much like a high IQ . . . a gift. . . and a curse. . . at once.
 

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I apologise in advance for this post, but you did ask. Here's what an INTJ-A that's far too gone to save thinks. INTJ is a curse. People online constantly make out like it's this great desirable set of traits, but my life experience is the total opposite.

Sad is an understatement. I'm more of a 'can't stand living in this cruel hell' sort of vibe. I (normally) try not to spread this negativity around externally (made that mistake too many times), but internally, I don't even believe in my own 'passions' anymore. I feel like I don't want to live, and it isn't some 'depressive state' where I need to see a doctor (done that), it's developed into my perspective of the world. My entire existence revolves around trying to cope with the fact that I'm this "INTJ" thing; a cruel joke that doesn't even make sense. I'm utterly direct yet seemingly always misunderstood, disliked by most as some know-it-all, armchair-expert arsewipe. All my achievements are taken for granted because people just expect it, even if it's in a new hobby or interest I have literally zero experience in (not that I need validation). Constantly having my self-confidence seen as a threat because of people's own insecurities, so forever a target for others to take down a peg. Always making paradoxical claims and statements that make perfect sense to me, but to others seem like some sort of nutjob rambling, so often accused of having no internal consistency. Forever trying to solve others' life problems, but every attempt to solve my own issues either backfires because of my own inadequacy (surprise, surprise, logic doesn't work for everything), or lulls me into a false sense of hope, before shattering my dreams of a light at the end of the tunnel. I always have answers to everyone else's suggestions on how to fix my life, perhaps the cop-outs of a stubborn, arrogant person who refuses to listen. It's like eternally living in solitary confinement, for a crime I never committed, or wasn't even accused or charged of. People will open the cell door when they need my help, or just to prod me with a stick for their own enjoyment, but will then lock the door behind them once they get their needs catered to.

Yes, I've given up hope, because it is delusional wishful thinking, writing a cheque I won't ever cash. Hope does nothing but crush my soul upon realisation I'm lying to myself to save face, or to be be somewhat optimistic. I don't trust anybody, because everybody I know or loved has betrayed my trust in some respect. No loyalty, the lot of them. I'm not letting anybody in, because I wouldn't even know where to start on that one. Yet I still care a bit, and I don't understand why. I shouldn't care about people who turn up after years looking for help/advice, when all they did was leave me to fester in the gutter. I shouldn't give a crap about a stranger I just met, in need. Yet I'm always there, like some kind of mug, desperate for a momentary piece of human interaction. Maybe it's different this time...nope. I guess I genuinely like helping people where I can? Maybe it's to impress them, i dunno, there's probably some selfish reason behind it, as ever. I survive by self-isolation, plodding onwards, because I don't have any other choice. I won't top myself; I won't give this world the satisfaction, and I'm not a quitter. I could try to use my "highly valued" logic and problem solving to apply to a highly irrational & illogical world, but I already tried that way too many times. I know how that story ends. I shouldn't have ever worked on my feeling side, because now I also feel bad, as well as thinking this way. And the mind never stops, every second of every day I have to think this crap. Even my 'dreams' torment me by manifesting depictions of how my life should have been, then cruelly awaken me to realise I still exist in hell. Having imagination is really fun.

I've dealt with things by simply retreating to my own world. Typical INTJ, reclusive loner bs. People isolated me, so I did the job properly. I'm now a complete fantasist, living in my own head. Working out obsessively for those lovely endorphins that momentarily relieve my existential malaise. Making art as a distraction, & a futile attempt to try to express that I can't express with words. Learning about everything I don't need to know, sometimes to help others, but generally to win some pointless argument to prove I'm right (yet again). Wasting time, waiting for the reaper. Basically non-solutions to the problems I face, utter avoidance, fully knowing I can't or will ever possess the personality or social skills to actually function properly in society. The more I tried, the worse things seemed to get, so giving up was inevitable. I haven't had anything resembling a support network for half a life, so trying to deal with everything in typical INTJ fashion, alone, I just screwed everything up that wasn't related to logical thinking, which unfortunately, are most things in life. Yay, being INTJ is so so amazing. What a gift!

I hate being an INTJ. It's cringey when I see them postulate about how good isolation is, that it's this amazing quality to have. Even animals don't live alone, it ain't right. It just makes you develop idiosyncrasies that will further isolate you. And then time; the "great healer" cements these things, driving the nails into your precious logical coffin. And it's so "cute" that I can't read social cues; I probably didn't even realise when people actually cared or loved me in some way. I'm really spoiled with all these amazing gifts. Again, I'm sorry. Sorry for bothering you. Sorry for trying with this life. I'll slither back into my cell now, where I clearly belong :rolleyes:

PS have a wonderful day. I hope you learned something. Use me as an example of how not to be or something... :dry:
Your second post and I have to give you a standing ovation. :applause:

Hey, chill up infinitus. At least you are going to endure your infinite misery together, here. Wish you the slightest smile.
 

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Houdini
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Your second post and I have to give you a standing ovation. :applause:

Hey, chill up infinitus. At least you are going to endure your infinite misery together, here. Wish you the slightest smile.
That's probably the best response I could hope for, so kudos; you're too kind :D
 

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Houdini
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What a difference 5 months can make :smug:

Hey, Infinitus from the past, we got our hope back, son. All those who made you feel like that will have a mirror reflecting back at them. I’ve lit a candle that no man can extinguish.
 

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What a difference 5 months can make :smug:

Hey, Infinitus from the past, we got our hope back, son. All those who made you feel like that will have a mirror reflecting back at them. I’ve lit a candle that no man can extinguish.
Illegitimi non carborundum est!

Used to be in my siggy. :winks:

And, oh yeah, i landed in this forum on one of my darkest days too.


Sent sans PC
 

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ENTJ
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What a difference 5 months can make :smug:

Hey, Infinitus from the past, we got our hope back, son. All those who made you feel like that will have a mirror reflecting back at them. I’ve lit a candle that no man can extinguish.
What changed? Looking for some inspiration here.
 
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