[Ann Kane]

Ugh! its late sorry for the spelling errors.

just getting some perspective..What are some things an INFJ guy may do if he likes an ENTP girl? Howz he going to act?
apologies if this is a repeat topic. I'm looking for this particular gender direction.

 

[strafen]

First of all you need to know for sure that this guy is a INFJ. INFJs are expert method actors and if you don't know that they are an INFJ for a fact then you should just risk it and ask him directly if he likes you or not (if hes an INFJ he will probably give you a truthful answer). As an INFJ I have never told anyone that I am an INFJ. I feel that the people who know about Mbriggz will abuse me to no extent if I do.

We watch from afar. I guess I would choose how I want to react to a girl hitting on me. Sometimes I tease and sometimes I just stare off into the distance as I try to think of something artistic to say. It really depends. Since you are an ENTP I guess we would generally feed off of your energy so you would see a lot of enthusiastic like "NO WAY!!" "OMG YES"'s. When I like a girl I tend to watch her a lot (with ma peripharalz) and 9/10 times I probably won't approach her.

Lets see...I smile a lot (given) uh...OH!!! you should initiate a hug! INFJs would never refuse a hug as long as its a suprise. If you ask if you can hug you just ruined it. I'm kind of brain dead atm (writing some stupid essay) If i think of more I will tell you

 

[GoodOldDreamer]

The best thing you could do is make your own interest known. If he's interested in you, that's all he's waiting for. And if he's not, well, I'm sure he'll let you down gently. He may even give it a go regardless and see if something can work out. )

We're great at big picture thinking. But with that comes all the thoughts of "Is she flirting with me, or is she just being friendly? Maybe flirting is how she's friendly with everyone. Is she honestly interested in me, or is she trying to get something from me? If I let her know I'm interested in her, and come to find out she doesn't respond in kind, will our current relationship be ruined? Hmm... what are the consequences of that?... If she does feel the same way, and our relationship is taken to the next level, am I willing to lose our friendship if it goes sour?..."

You can see how it could make someone hesitant. Every choice has a consequence, and we can be aware of nearly all possible consequences, lol. Anytime I've been interested in a woman, I've prayed and wished desperately that she would step up and let me know she felt the same way first, if only to narrow those consequences down, lol.

 

[OffTheBooks]

I wouldn't say INFJs never refuse hugs. I abhor physical contact by anyone I have not given my consent to.
Also, I have never asked a woman out, ever.

When I like a woman, I'm going to put myself out there, be available, courteous, and offer suggestions for things we might do. If she doesn't get the message, I'll say something like, "Hey, the thing on Friday is pretty yuppy, dress nice." If she STILL doesn't get the message/ask if it's a date/have the "define our friendship" talk/ask to fool around, I usually just pine over her in secret, and limit my contact to a more emotionally manageable, friendship level. That said, I don't have the worst luck when it comes to being asked out by women. Maybe it's a Minneapolis thing.

Not really sure why I approach it the way I do, I just don't like the thought of someone's company only being desirable, contingent on a guy's desire for a non platonic connection. I think there's a lot of pressure on women to be more than friends with guy friends, and I don't really like contributing to that pressure.

I have plenty of female friends, and have no problems with platonic friendships with women, though sometimes it might bug someone I'm seeing, and I can definitely understand why it might, having mentioned the pressures surrounding such situations, even though I've never and never would cheat on a romantic relationship. Regardless, I don't think I'm the only INFJ that can have meaningful relationships not based on romance.

Maybe you should ask him out. He may not have even considered you as a prospective romantic interest, if you all were friends first. If you are really good friends, and he's an INFJ, I don't think he'd be put off by you asking, in the least. If anything he'll just be curious why you asked, why you waited, what attracts you to him, etc... Either way, I'm sure it will be endearing, either as a friend or more.

 

[joedcr287]

I'm actually in this situation. There is an ENTP girl I like. When I'm around her, I seem to become... "lighter" than I usually am. I become unusually spontaneous and will do things that would normally bore me so I could just merely talk to her. E.g. I HATE long movies, but I actually watched the extended edition of her favorite movie trilogy, The Lord of the Rings, just so I could talk to her about it (and now The Hobbit is coming soon *groan!*) I take any chance I get to have meaningless conversation with her.

Hope that helped, but do you mind if I reverse that question?

How would an ENTP girl act around an INFJ guy? I'm just curious for... obvious*cough* resons.

 

[OffTheBooks]

I'm actually in this situation. There is an ENTP girl I like. When I'm around her, I seem to become... "lighter" than I usually am. I become unusually spontaneous and will do things that would normally bore me so I could just merely talk to her. E.g. I HATE long movies, but I actually watched the extended edition of her favorite movie trilogy, The Lord of the Rings, just so I could talk to her about it (and now The Hobbit is coming soon *groan!*) I take any chance I get to have meaningless conversation with her.

This. Exactly.
We INFJs don't put ourselves out there, all that much, and if we do, there's probably a very good reason, in our minds, to do so.

 

[strafen]

This. Exactly.
We INFJs don't put ourselves out there, all that much, and if we do, there's probably a very good reason, in our mines, to do so.

lol ive been told by several girls that my "putting myself out there" is practically the same as how I usually act. T____T females...and I expected them to catch onto the small nuances of my behavior....

And omg spontenaety!!! An INFJ's creativity multiplies ten fold when it comes to a girl he likes. For example in the 1/10 chance that I do ask someone to homecoming, its not going to be with flowers and chocolates. Well the girl I asked really liked manga/anime so I drew a scene of me asking her to homecoming with the ending open ended. :|

An INFJ has to be like infatuated with someone before they take the initiative... and the initiative might not be very much either...

Though plactonic friendships are okay in my book I guess I wouldn't mind at all if I went out with one of them.

 

[ohnoezitsjoez]

And omg spontenaety!!! An INFJ's creativity multiplies ten fold when it comes to a girl he likes. For example in the 1/10 chance that I do ask someone to homecoming, its not going to be with flowers and chocolates. Well the girl I asked really liked manga/anime so I drew a scene of me asking her to homecoming with the ending open ended. :|

Maybe this is self serving, but I find a certain brilliance and beauty that is under appreciated with some of the ways I have heard INFJ's make these creative gestures. Who cares if they are sometimes corny. If they are sincere, and real effort and thought was put into it, I think the world needs that. The world needs a little corny.

For me, there is nothing quite as deflating and disappointing than to work hard on this great idea for a gesture of interest, only to see it dismissed, invalidated or worse, ignored. The pain of rejection is one thing, but when you invest in the gesture and personalize it, a lot of thought and effort goes into it... its a bit rougher.

No one expects these kooky things to always work, but there could be something said of recognizing and appreciating the effort put into something, even if the end result is rejection. I would like to think if someone did something creative for me, I could genuinely recognize and appreciate the investment and thought, even if I had to say "no". C'est la vie!