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1. Personality Cafe and the massive train wrecks on it.
2. George Carlin
3. Probably you
4. People, especially dumb/stupid people with shit for brains
5. Myself
6. The movie Ghostworld, Office Space, 10 Things I Hate About You and other movie scenes, that I cannot remember, etc

I am easily amused by a lot of things I observe, then my brain takes those observations and puts it through the smart ass/sarcastic/mock cycle and spins out some great shit. As a result, I have a permanent grin on my face for a good while, it's fucking awesome and I probably look pretty retarded when people wonder wtf I'm laughing at. I'm sure there's definitely some Ni going on there as well: Observe A, Jump to F, Conclusion: Major lulz to death.
 

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I usually laugh when someone can argue with me logically & persuasively with out-of-ordinar reasons :laughing:

I'm fed up with hearing "Can we stop talking about this?" & those people who simply accept my points w/o brainstorming how to protect theirs or just keep silent and walk away or lose their temper when they don't know how to answer :confused:
 

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I am easily amused. The happenstance, the coincidental. To give everyone a chuckle I'll tell you something that happened to me this morning.

To preface it I'll tell you that my father was an ENTP. :)

I has been 12 years since you died, but I can still hear your voice: exasperated, flabbergasted, dumbfounded, and very much amused. I can still see you standing there with one hand over your face, looking at me, and you would say, "WHY did you do this?"

This morning I know what I would have said to you.

"I don't know 'Why', Daddy. I guess I put the table legs on my dining room table inside out for the same reason that you once took a Christmas tree that was too tall for the living room and shortened it by chopping off the top!" :crazy:

Happy Holidays, everyone, and thank you to Daddy for being the ghostly chuckle I heard this morning while I incorrectly assembled my furniture! :laughing:
 

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I am easily amused. The happenstance, the coincidental. To give everyone a chuckle I'll tell you something that happened to me this morning.

To preface it I'll tell you that my father was an ENTP. :)

I has been 12 years since you died, but I can still hear your voice: exasperated, flabbergasted, dumbfounded, and very much amused. I can still see you standing there with one hand over your face, looking at me, and you would say, "WHY did you do this?"

This morning I know what I would have said to you.

"I don't know 'Why', Daddy. I guess I put the table legs on my dining room table inside out for the same reason that you once took a Christmas tree that was too tall for the living room and shortened it by chopping off the top!" :crazy:

Happy Holidays, everyone, and thank you to Daddy for being the ghostly chuckle I heard this morning while I incorrectly assembled my furniture! :laughing:
You're an INFJ, not an INTJ...thread title comprehension ftw.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anahata View Post
I am easily amused. The happenstance, the coincidental. To give everyone a chuckle I'll tell you something that happened to me this morning.

To preface it I'll tell you that my father was an ENTP. :)

I has been 12 years since you died, but I can still hear your voice: exasperated, flabbergasted, dumbfounded, and very much amused. I can still see you standing there with one hand over your face, looking at me, and you would say, "WHY did you do this?"

This morning I know what I would have said to you.

"I don't know 'Why', Daddy. I guess I put the table legs on my dining room table inside out for the same reason that you once took a Christmas tree that was too tall for the living room and shortened it by chopping off the top!"

Happy Holidays, everyone, and thank you to Daddy for being the ghostly chuckle I heard this morning while I incorrectly assembled my furniture!
You're an INFJ, not an INTJ...thread title comprehension ftw.
Well, I am an INTJ, and I found that very funny... :tongue:
 

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I find dead baby jokes funny....
 

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I've always enjoyed George Carlin's humor. Here are a few bits:

YouTube - George Carlin - Religion is bullshit.

YouTube - George Carlin - Saving the Planet

YouTube - George Carlin Talks About "Stuff"

YouTube - The Seven Words

Humor like that in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," "Clerks," "Love Actually," "Four Weddings and a Funeral" and the BBC version of "Coupling" and "The Office" are all forms of humor I've really enjoyed time and time again. There are also shows like "Frasier," as well as geeky humor like this beauty from Jon Skeet:

Jon Skeet - Stack Overflow Dev Days London 2009 on Vimeo
Carlin rocks!!!!!!! thanks for the reminder!!!! made my day :tongue:
 

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I'm too lazy to post the video, but I think you can find it on youtube under "bed intruder song" It's actually a real newscast but it's been auto tuned
 

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That is funny. The fact that that's my alignment is even more funny. The fact that one of my career compatibilities is "dictator" is even more funny. Especially in combination with the first two facts.

Voldy: I am now here. Feed me grapes.
Nico: .... Red or green?
Voldy: And brains of children... And vaginas of old ladies.... Haha.. Hahahahaaaaa! HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
Nico: -takes note-
Voldy: I want a decorated throne. Where is my DECORATED THRONE?!
Nico: -points at-
Voldy: You call that decorated? Where are the furs? The slaves? Where is the pig to warm my feet?!
Nico: -all things appear-
Voldy: Who's my good little cat? -pinches his cheeks- Yes he is such a good little cat! Agoo! Agoo!!
Nico: -mental faceplam-
Voldy: I CAN SEE THAT!
Nico: -innocence-
Voldy: -mental swat-
Nico: -mental cuddle-
Voldy: -mental put-on-collar-with-diamonds-cuz-thems-cool kthx-
Nico: Necessary?
Voldy: Why? You don't like it?
Nico: I'm just saying it may be a tad extravagent.
Voldy: I like it. Don't argue.
Nico: Of course.
Voldy: I like obedience. It will be on my Christmas list.
Nico: I will always be obedient.
Voldy: Did I forget to feed you again?
Nico: No.
Voldy: Do you want cat nibbles?
Nico: No thank you.
Voldy: -pauses- Dog nibbles?
Nico: Thank you, but I have had my fill.
Voldy: What, pray tell, did you eat, then? Not my prisoners, right?
Nico: No, not your prisoners.
Voldy: Whose prisoners? Dumbledore's? You realise those are my people, right?
Nico: I was feeling particularly animal.
Voldy: ..My snake?
Nico: No. Not your snake.
Voldy: Is this twenty questions? Do I need to AK you?
Nico: -grins- A bear.
Voldy: A bear? -is about to applaud, but stops- A bear?
Nico: A bear.
Voldy: You didn't bother to bring home deer?
Nico: Do you want a deer?
Nico: I can go get one.
Voldy: Of course I want deer! Do I look like someone who would settle for any regular cow?
Nico: I'll be back then.
Voldy: Hurry. I might just start torturing people out of sheer boredom.
Nico: -scarpers off-
Nico: -and returns-
Voldy: -is torturing people out of sheer boredom-
Nico: Missed me that much?
Voldy: I missed my deer.
Nico: It's being skinned.
Voldy: But it's not roasted.
Nico: They'll roast it.
Voldy: Who's they?
Nico: That chef we aquisitioned last year.
Voldy: Was he amongst the recently tortured?
Nico: No.
Voldy: Oh, good. Yes, go ahead.
Nico: It's being taken care of.
Voldy: -sighs- Taking over the world is boring.
Nico: I'm very sorry.
Voldy: Should I grow a beard? Would people fear me more with a beard?
Nico: A beard? Well you could pull it off.
Voldy: Of course I could pull it off! I CAN PULL ANYTHING OFF OF EVERYTHING!
Nico: Absolutely, sir.
Voldy: So, what have you been doing lately?
Nico: Torturing. Eating people. Destroying lives. The typical.
Voldy: Not my people, right?
Nico: Just the people you don't like.
Voldy: Dumbledore?
Nico: I think he'll be chewy.
Voldy: Like beef jerky.
Nico: That's really unfortunate.
Voldy: You don't like beef jerky?
Nico: Not a lot.
Voldy: I much more prefer those German sausages..
Nico: -snerk-
Voldy: What?
Nico: Nothing.
Voldy: Say it or I'll read it in your HEAD and AK you for it.
Nico: It was an innuendo, sir.
Voldy: You've been having far too much sex.
Nico: Have I?
Voldy: Apparently.
Nico: Apologies.
Voldy: Don't give me your false apologies.
Nico: Then I take it back.
Nico: Sex never hurt anyone.
Nico: Okay. I take that back too.
Nico: I hurt people.
Voldy: You're not sex.
Nico: True.
Nico: Having sex with me tends to be hurtful for most people.
Voldy: And who are all these people? I will torture them.
Voldy: Out of sheer boredom.
Nico: Why?
Voldy: I said that. Out of sheer boredom.
Nico: Destructive. Excellent.
Nico: I have a question.
Voldy: Twenty questions or just..?
Nico: Just one.
Voldy: Okay. Go.
Nico: Would it be unsavory for me to have hateful and angry sex with Bellatrix?
Voldy: Very unsavory.
Nico: Like, the sort of unsavory you would get over, or the kind where I get used as a foot rest for weeks?
Voldy: I like your fur under my feet.
Nico: Beside the point.
Voldy: Are you saying I should get over it?
Nico: I'm just curious as to how mad you would be.
Voldy: I don't get mad.
Nico: Displeased.
Voldy: I get furious and randomly AK people.
Nico: Would it be AK worthy?
Voldy: Everything is AK worthy. Stocks dropping is AK worthy.
Nico: A valid point.
Voldy: As I always make them so.
Nico: Fair enough.
Nico: So... Bellatrix
Voldy: Bellatrix.
Nico: Can I?
Voldy: Why are you asking me? I'm not married to her.
Nico: Because, I'm rather attached to my penis. I would rather you not severe it post-coitus.
Voldy: All men tend to be attached to their penis, aren't they? You should think about a detachable one.
Nico: I'll think about that another time. I'm content with what I have now.
Voldy: Strive for perfection. A detachable penis is the way to go.
Nico: Do you have a detachable one?
Voldy: Do you want to find out?
Nico: Vaguely.
Voldy: I'm intrigued.
Nico: Lovely.
Voldy: Smashing, we say here in Britain.
Nico: Very well.
Voldy: Say it.
Nico: Smashing.
Voldy: Smashing!
Nico: Smashing.
Voldy: Smashing!
Nico: Are we through?
Voldy: Yea, I'm bored.
Nico: What did we deviate from?
Voldy: ...Potted plants?
Nico: Exactly.
Voldy: What?
Nico: I have no idea.
I find that funny too. Quel as Voldemort. I really should look into that dictator career..
 
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