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Discussion Starter #1
have you guys had this feeling before? usually, what did it mean for you guys?

i have this feeling today... but at the same time, i find myself unconsciously also fighting this feeling, telling myself to ignore it...

i think this deep, sinking feeling in my stomach is maybe about to bring up anxiety... or cautioning me to be careful, but i don't know what...
 

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do you have to poop?
Something... big is coming... :laughing:


have you guys had this feeling before? usually, what did it mean for you guys?

i have this feeling today... but at the same time, i find myself unconsciously also fighting this feeling, telling myself to ignore it...

i think this deep, sinking feeling in my stomach is maybe about to bring up anxiety... or cautioning me to be careful, but i don't know what...
Yeah... happens to me sometimes... sometimes something just doesn't feel right. And I do try to pay attention to these feelings. They've helped me out in the past.
 

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honestly it sounds like you are torn between two unconcious decisions. what are you thinking abou? any images? if it is pure feeling than I am sorry you are there, anything inspiring these feelings? any thoughts before the feelings?

like I have mentioned before...

caffine and running or walking at least... just get moving.
 

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Last time I had that intense feeling I ignored it, resulting in major life crack-up... Things might have evolved different if I'd given more tought to why I had that feeling, though. I'd rather not go into details, as this is a story best untold (at least on the internet).
 
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I agree with GreenCoyte Go for a run .Nothing works better for me .Don't worry about time or distance just run untill you feel better.It gives you plenty of time to sort or figure things out.The gym does'nt work as well because you have to think about the next excersise and people are around .
 

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I get this feeling too but it is particular to what is going on. Sometimes I think I find out later what it was and sometimes I am never quite sure. Couldnt' tell ya.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
So something did happen today. At a meeting for work. I wrote about this person before either here or the ISTJ thread i forget. but she basically one-upped me. she sort of took over a project i was supposed to do in the next month. I'm on track but i dont have the final product yet (i dont like to reveal things until they are completely done), but she presented her project.

WTF. That is FUCKED up. Sorry for the cursing, but she can seriously just. UGH.

At this point, I don't care what the committee says. I'm too tired as fuck to care about it. and I'm tired of always trying to please people. I did what I had to do, and if some stupid person wanted to suck up to the committee by doing my work "better" than whatever.

I honestly have struggled with this place.

When i first started, i started because i thought this work was in line with my values and my interests, but after i got into it, i realized it wasn't at all. I still feel obliged to follow through and finish what i agreed to do. so I will. but i'm not going to let some other person's crap get to me anymore.

it's funny how we have these things that signal us.

because of that feeling, the events of this meeting didn't take me by surprise. i was emotionally prepared to expect the worst. which is funny because i had so many meetings today, i didn't think it would be this one, but i guess i sort of just knew in my heart somewhere.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
and lately I've changed.

I know how to stand up for myself now. And even though I didn't outwardly say it, I can feel that I am standing up for myself now, because I'm not beating myself up, because I realize that 1) i didn't do anything wrong in that I've been doing what I've been told to do and 2) i don't feel the need to explain myself to the committee chair, because it's really clear. this person wanted to suck up to the committee by doing my project before i did.

i just feel pissed off to be in this position though, because i never asked to be in here, ugh, i guess it's life just teaching me a lesson.

Seriously today though, I am proud of myself for being pissed off and just NOT caring. i seriously don't feel miserable, and i think it is a good sign i'm not blaming myself for something the other person did. a part of me is somewhat saddened by how other people might see me, but i realize now that if their perception of me changes because of this, they weren't worth it to begin with and who cares if they see me differently or not? since when did their perception define who I am?

I'm growing up guys. :happy:
 

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So something did happen today. At a meeting for work. I wrote about this person before either here or the ISTJ thread i forget. but she basically one-upped me. she sort of took over a project i was supposed to do in the next month. I'm on track but i dont have the final product yet (i dont like to reveal things until they are completely done), but she presented her project.

WTF. That is FUCKED up. Sorry for the cursing, but she can seriously just. UGH.

At this point, I don't care what the committee says. I'm too tired as fuck to care about it. and I'm tired of always trying to please people. I did what I had to do, and if some stupid person wanted to suck up to the committee by doing my work "better" than whatever.

I honestly have struggled with this place.

When i first started, i started because i thought this work was in line with my values and my interests, but after i got into it, i realized it wasn't at all. I still feel obliged to follow through and finish what i agreed to do. so I will. but i'm not going to let some other person's crap get to me anymore.

it's funny how we have these things that signal us.

because of that feeling, the events of this meeting didn't take me by surprise. i was emotionally prepared to expect the worst. which is funny because i had so many meetings today, i didn't think it would be this one, but i guess i sort of just knew in my heart somewhere.
and lately I've changed.

I know how to stand up for myself now. And even though I didn't outwardly say it, I can feel that I am standing up for myself now, because I'm not beating myself up, because I realize that 1) i didn't do anything wrong in that I've been doing what I've been told to do and 2) i don't feel the need to explain myself to the committee chair, because it's really clear. this person wanted to suck up to the committee by doing my project before i did.

i just feel pissed off to be in this position though, because i never asked to be in here, ugh, i guess it's life just teaching me a lesson.

Seriously today though, I am proud of myself for being pissed off and just NOT caring. i seriously don't feel miserable, and i think it is a good sign i'm not blaming myself for something the other person did. a part of me is somewhat saddened by how other people might see me, but i realize now that if their perception of me changes because of this, they weren't worth it to begin with and who cares if they see me differently or not? since when did their perception define who I am?

I'm growing up guys. :happy:

looks like your poop is going well.

sounds like a build up of shit that just needed to come out :happy:
 

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Discussion Starter #14
yup, poop that built up for 22 years.

all of it - OUT. now. RIGHT NOW.

I think that... the world is full of billions of people, and people will inevitably misunderstand me , who i am, what i'm about. And if i try and correct all of this, i'll go insane and i'll just lose myself in doing so because i'll start defining myself based on how i think others see me and how well i please others.

i've been stuck in that rut for a while now. As my many threads on here have shown.

maybe it's because i'm tired, or maybe all that poop was just DYING to get out, but NO MORE. It's hard... and I think it's even counterintuitive for me to NOT want to correct this misunderstanding because I'm always about "OH NO. What if they think this about me?"

I just realized I need to just do what I do, continue at what I do, and hope that others can see the good in me like i try to see the good in them. If they don't, and choose to misunderstand me, it is their choice. and i may have lost a good ally, but i still have the best ally . and that is myself.
 

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It probably will :) they say women in middle age feel much more confident than those who are in their 20s so apparently it does build up. In MBTI sense I do think it has something to do with development of that 3rd of 4th function which for most SF and NF women is one of the T functions. STs and NTs on the other hand start to get softer. And so equilibrium is reached ... or something like that lol :tongue:
 

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have you guys had this feeling before? usually, what did it mean for you guys?

i have this feeling today... but at the same time, i find myself unconsciously also fighting this feeling, telling myself to ignore it...

i think this deep, sinking feeling in my stomach is maybe about to bring up anxiety... or cautioning me to be careful, but i don't know what...
It might not just be anxiety, it can be a nervous breakdown. When I got that feeling in my stomach for the first time, it included feelings like I having to vomit, it was so strong that I nearly threw up. It came like an explosion. I had a lump in my throat. I wanted to cry but couldn't (I can't cry). And my mind turned all foggy. It was kind of like a panic attack but it wasn't, it was filled with depression too. I had to seek help, and I had to get my hands on valium for it to go away. I have this feeling three times a day now, and they last for 30 minutes each. Luckely for me it's not as strong as it was the first time, now they just annoy me and make me unfocused. But I mean, it's kind of like when you were a kid, you had water in your eyes, and were one second away from crying --that's what it feels like, but that one second last for thirty minutes!
 

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The Void

curious0610,

Nice to see that you are perhaps surfacing, and letting go, and trying to find some root causes to your feelings...I am posting here, I will find out more information, but when I am in maximum insecurity mode, sometimes, I step into what I call 'THE VOID'. Where my insides suddenly become like the Grand Canyon. I'm not sure what this is...But I often now do what I can to not get into the void, because it is a scary place. I will read up more on 'THE VOID' and try to add more to this topic, when I can.

Maybe it is time for you to reassess your life and find some new goals, moving away from the rut. ISTJs are tough cookies. I'm not sure I follow what this means for your career, what happened...but only talk about it if you feel like it. I'm certain you have everything under control. Be confident in yourself. You do matter at your workplace. You should shine too, there.

ISTJ is good at pushing forward themselves and their ideas. My sister is ISTJ, she knows how to be aggressive, and 'relevant', in her speech and actions, which causes others to gravitate towards her ways, and ideas. What is your role in this project? What did you want it to be? I understood you were leading at one point, and you feel this ISTJ took over? Uncertain. But again, only talk about it if it helps your process...I think your contemplating and talking a lot lately, has to do with you looking to forge a path, not necessarily that you over think and over analyze also...

I can't wait to get back to your Thread about your office cutie. How is that coming along? I'm going to ask the same question I asked you earlier in that Thread! hehehe, and take a look at the answer before I reply again. I asked the question, what is your purpose in getting to know this office lad?....I will ask again on your other Thread. This will let me know how to make a small suggestion about your next approach. As an INFJ actress (imagine) you will be able to do what you like! And he'll fall under your spell...ha ha ha [FemINFJ laughs evilly!]
 
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