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so i have this infp i've been friends with for... about 7 years now. shes had a horrible month with the loss of 2 friends to accidents, started school and is going threw some health problems herself as far as being able to have kids..
i've always been there for her and she the same back.. lately shes hinted that she wants to settle down with me, im 24, already.... secure as far as income, job , home etc.. shes 22 and has 2 years left of nursing school. i've taken what she says as a grain of salt because alot changes in 2 years but i've been slowly moving our relationship closer. i've planed a trip for the 2 of us to san franscisco for 4 days christmas week, she seems totally excited..
anyway... i sent her some flowers, and her favorite candy (Swedish fish) they should have gotten to her already and yet.. i cant get a hold of her.. no thanks.. i just sent it as "im thinking of you" kinda thing and" i know you've had a hard month.. hope this brings a smile to your face, if only for a moment" i dunno... i thought as in infj that i just vanished... i've met my match and i dont like it..:unsure: just a "yeah i got it, thanks" would suffice..
just something i had to get off my chest..100 bucks in the trash..:frustrating:
 

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so i have this infp i've been friends with for... about 7 years now. shes had a horrible month with the loss of 2 friends to accidents, started school and is going threw some health problems herself as far as being able to have kids..
i've always been there for her and she the same back.. lately shes hinted that she wants to settle down with me, im 24, already.... secure as far as income, job , home etc.. shes 22 and has 2 years left of nursing school. i've taken what she says as a grain of salt because alot changes in 2 years but i've been slowly moving our relationship closer. i've planed a trip for the 2 of us to san franscisco for 4 days christmas week, she seems totally excited..
anyway... i sent her some flowers, and her favorite candy (Swedish fish) they should have gotten to her already and yet.. i cant get a hold of her.. no thanks.. i just sent it as "im thinking of you" kinda thing and" i know you've had a hard month.. hope this brings a smile to your face, if only for a moment" i dunno... i thought as in infj that i just vanished... i've met my match and i dont like it..:unsure: just a "yeah i got it, thanks" would suffice..
just something i had to get off my chest..100 bucks in the trash..:frustrating:
It's interesting that she wants to settle down with you, and yet you refer to her as "friend".
 

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INFP's are strange creatures. One day I'll be talking for 6 hours on the phone, and then for the next three days they don't want to be alive. Fi is their dominant function, so they must always "be in the mood" for anything. Let her grieve and be there for her as you always have. It will pay off in the end.
 

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It's interesting that she wants to settle down with you, and yet you refer to her as "friend".
hahaha thats a really good point.. we've always had a "bond" maybe thats the "NF" thing
i've always called her friend... because its always been kinda a partnership... i dunno.
 

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so i have this infp i've been friends with for... about 7 years now. shes had a horrible month with the loss of 2 friends to accidents, started school and is going threw some health problems herself as far as being able to have kids..
i've always been there for her and she the same back.. lately shes hinted that she wants to settle down with me, im 24, already.... secure as far as income, job , home etc.. shes 22 and has 2 years left of nursing school. i've taken what she says as a grain of salt because alot changes in 2 years but i've been slowly moving our relationship closer. i've planed a trip for the 2 of us to san franscisco for 4 days christmas week, she seems totally excited..
anyway... i sent her some flowers, and her favorite candy (Swedish fish) they should have gotten to her already and yet.. i cant get a hold of her.. no thanks.. i just sent it as "im thinking of you" kinda thing and" i know you've had a hard month.. hope this brings a smile to your face, if only for a moment" i dunno... i thought as in infj that i just vanished... i've met my match and i dont like it..:unsure: just a "yeah i got it, thanks" would suffice..
just something i had to get off my chest..100 bucks in the trash..:frustrating:

I'll be straight to the point. It may sound mean or blunt. And forgive me, I'm a little tired. But I wish to give you some good news. You and her have been there for eachother for the past 7 years!!!!

Furthermore, she explained to you that she wants to be with you!!!!!

Third, she is going through an emotional roller coaster ride!!! Plus a baby on its way!!!! How you expect her to act??? She lost two friends.... how often does that happen to her at her age? So it is not easy trying to figure out how to deal with that. Sometimes people need a time out in order to figure things out.

She more than likely not being herself, because of her situation. The best that she can do is to thank you. This is going to take some time and she is probably numb by the past month, you stated that yourself. She not able to think right this moment.

And I know you mean well, and you didn't expect that kind of response. You had your feelings hurt because you were thinking about her and you feel you didn't deserve that. Remember, she's not thinking right now.

Point is, later in time, she will know you care and love her. She just needs to go through the healing process. Okay? I hope this helped and if not, do not pay much attention to what I am saying. I am not trying intentionally to sound rude. I'm tired. Sorry. Just slept a few hours. But I figured you may want my intake on this.:happy:

Sincerely,
Johnny
 

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All sounds well to me. I think you're just overanalysing your social interactions as we INFJs tend to do. Within the realm of your introverted intuition you may have attached all sorts of meanings to whatever is happening, but to an objective outsider like me it seems to be going really well. If she doesn't thank you within in a week, then maybe you should ask her if she got the presents. She's going through a hard time right now it seems, so unusual behavior is to be expected I guess.

Considering the circumstances, I don't think there's anything you've got to worry about. Lighten up! :laughing:
 

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Discussion Starter #7
SLN... i think your right! i do need a good smack in the back of the head sometimes..
jamescarrolls.. no baby on the way, we're talking about it tho.. just stuff about adopting because she might be unable to conceive and she wants to know that i will be ok with.. not having a biological child of my own.
im tired, got bored... let my mind run away with thing.. that's why i posted this, it gets me into trouble lol thanks for understanding, i appreciate it!
 

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xNFP's have a way of dropping off the planet for periods of time. I have an INFP and an ENFP that both do that when heavily stressed. It makes me go through all my worst case scenarios when I don't hear from them so I know what you're going through. I'd say give it time and be supportive. She'll be back and you'll be there to comfort her.
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yea I'm willing to bet good money that she loved your gift and is thankful for it. I agree that her emotions are prolly to blame for her dropping off the face of the planet. Sorry though.... that's tough.... especially doing something so nice and not getting much closure on things. But I would definitely trust that your kind actions are deeply appreciated.
 
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so i have this infp i've been friends with for... about 7 years now. shes had a horrible month with the loss of 2 friends to accidents, started school and is going threw some health problems herself as far as being able to have kids..
i've always been there for her and she the same back.. lately shes hinted that she wants to settle down with me, im 24, already.... secure as far as income, job , home etc.. shes 22 and has 2 years left of nursing school. i've taken what she says as a grain of salt because alot changes in 2 years but i've been slowly moving our relationship closer. i've planed a trip for the 2 of us to san franscisco for 4 days christmas week, she seems totally excited..
anyway... i sent her some flowers, and her favorite candy (Swedish fish) they should have gotten to her already and yet.. i cant get a hold of her.. no thanks.. i just sent it as "im thinking of you" kinda thing and" i know you've had a hard month.. hope this brings a smile to your face, if only for a moment" i dunno... i thought as in infj that i just vanished... i've met my match and i dont like it..:unsure: just a "yeah i got it, thanks" would suffice..
just something i had to get off my chest..100 bucks in the trash..:frustrating:
I know what you mean. As difficult of a time as she's going through... it can't ease things to not hear from the one you care about.

Try not to worry too much though... she probably wants some space to withdraw for a wihle. It sucks to say... but now would be the time for you to do something for yourself and try to keep from worrying too much.

The more you worry... the more awkward it'll get for her and it could end up damaging the relationship. If I were you I'd be ready to support her with whatever she needed... but I wouldn't be pushy about it.
 
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