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opposite would be... reject yourself? If you're rejecting yourself then I guess you don't like yourself very much.. but then you can improve yourself, no? ionno
 

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People always seem to put inner-contentedness as a prerequisite for self-acceptance rather than as a byproduct of it. In my opinion, self-acceptance is a very difficult, if not impossible, state to actually "achieve". It's an ideal, and along the way you reach increasing milestones of inner respect, compassion and power. It involves many things, far beyond what the word "acceptance" simply entails. Most of the work done is through simply being present with yourself and accepting, but not holding onto, how you feel and think, and how you fluctuate from moment to moment. At least, that may just be the first step, getting back into contact with the flow of emotions and experience. In truth, I don't know the entirety of it, and I doubt many do. But that is my perception of it, at least.
 

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People always seem to put inner-contentedness as a prerequisite for self-acceptance rather than as a byproduct of it. In my opinion, self-acceptance is a very difficult, if not impossible, state to actually "achieve". It's an ideal, and along the way you reach increasing milestones of inner respect, compassion and power. It involves many things, far beyond what the word "acceptance" simply entails. Most of the work done is through simply being present with yourself and accepting, but not holding onto, how you feel and think, and how you fluctuate from moment to moment. At least, that may just be the first step, getting back into contact with the flow of emotions and experience. In truth, I don't know the entirety of it, and I doubt many do. But that is my perception of it, at least.
Sometimes, I think even self-rejection is somehow involved in the never-ending process of self-acceptance. I'm not too sure but that's my case.
 

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Well, I wanna know about it.
What's accept yourself?
Give me some examples, please :happy:
I'd say it's the prominent idea that you are who you are and you should learn to live with yourself. It's the idea that we're all imperfect human-beings and that we mustn't hold ourselves to unrealistic standards - or in other words, we all make mistakes and we should be okay with that if we do. That's generally what it means.
 

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I'd say you are someone with weaknesses and strengths, flaws and qualities. Acknowledge them, seek how you can realistically better yourself with that knowledge while not forgetting that you can never truly be perfect, and go from there.
 

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I'd say you are someone with weaknesses and strengths, flaws and qualities. Acknowledge them, seek how you can realistically better yourself with that knowledge, and go from there.
I personally agree with this version, but I've seen another strain that promotes self love without the self-examination aspect, as attempts to change or "better" the self are sometimes viewed as "inauthentic" to the self.
 

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I personally agree with this version, but I've seen another strain that promotes self love without the self-examination aspect, as attempts to change or "better" the self are sometimes viewed as "inauthentic" to the self.
I think introspection is a very important aspect that must not be neglected in order to grow into a healthy and balanced individual. There's a distinction to make between changing your entire nature and working on your flaws.
 

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It's kind of like... Calming down. Being humble. Not too high and not too low. Alive.
 
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I think introspection is a very important aspect that must not be neglected in order to grow into a healthy and balanced individual. There's a distinction to make between changing your entire nature and working on your flaws.
I agree. The other approach is just one I have known others to argue for.
 
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I think it means understanding and accepting your strength and weakness, don't be critical of yourself, be yourself even in front of strangers no matter what people think of you.
 
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I'd say you are someone with weaknesses and strengths, flaws and qualities. Acknowledge them, seek how you can realistically better yourself with that knowledge while not forgetting that you can never truly be perfect, and go from there.
I like this description. Sometimes, acceptance is mixed up with complacency, so people dismiss their flaws by saying "that's just how I am". To accept oneself, to me, is to be objective and honest, seeing strengths and dysfunctions as they are.

One has a choice of changing or not changing those traits and then making an informed and thought-out choice based on what one thinks is better is another way of honoring yourself (to address the issue Pilot raised about authenticity, and in agreement with Amaryllis about the importance of introspection).
 
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I hate the idea of it in most contexts,it's just not productive at all.
And it always reminds me of fat acceptance and pride and all that should be abolished.

Of course you shouldn't just sit there and hate yourself,but just accept everything?Sure,it'd work for some people but most are lazy and just can't wait for someone to tell them to accept themselves so they could feel ok about staying their crappy selves.Sorry for bluntness,but that's the truth.
 

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Well, I wanna know about it.
What's accept yourself?
Give me some examples, please :happy:
I'll make this simple. Did you know there are gay people who get heterosexual marriages? That's not accepting yourself. How badly you don't accept yourself depends on 2 things: 1, how different from society you are, and 2, how much pressure your parents put on you. And maybe also just your inherent personality to a degree. So if you're a gay person who had strict conservative Christian parents, congratulations, you've probably got issues. Some personalities will rebel pretty much immediately. Others will think, "oh my god, this isn't who I am supposed to be, I need to try to change". And they will work at it for years, until they are forced to realize they literally can't keep it together. These self-imposed straight marriages tend to fall apart. And hey, so do many marriages between 2 heterosexuals, because they are actually doing the same thing to a lesser extent. Just trying to conform.

So at a certain point you have to let go and say, people will judge me, my life may fall apart, but this is who I am. It tends to feel selfish and/or lazy. People harbor a lot of guilt because they have been told not to be themselves their whole lives and they think they need to not be themselves to make other people happy. To stop would be to disappoint their parents, their friends, etc. But one must look out for one's own interests too in this life.

Try living from within as much as possible. Do what you want to do. If you don't want to go to some social event, don't. If you don't want to keep up some project or chore, don't. Do what interests you instead. Even if it's watching some TV. Eventually you'll learn more and more about who you're really supposed to be in this world. You'll begin to live from within instead of trying to fit yourself into some external framework. You'll see with your own eyes.
 

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I might add, it's not only a question of actions. It's a question of self-knowledge. Again as an example, there is a difference between a gay in a straight relationship who knows he is gay, and one who still thinks that his gay thoughts aren't a part of him and he can rid himself of them. The reason I advocate "doing what you want" is because sometimes the actions come before the words in our conscious understanding of things. Nonetheless, it is possible to know who you are and consciously act in contrary to this for some reason, e.g. survival.
 
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