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Imagine This:

Morning people, imagine a life in which you are perpetually jet-lagged.

You are forced to work from 7pm-3am in order to earn a living, there are few jobs outside that timeframe. Companies don’t care that these aren’t your best hours of the day.

You wake up with the sun at 6am despite having gone to bed about 20 mintues after you got off work at 3. You lay there wide awake willing yourself to get some more shut-eye for the day to come. You finally just give up around 8 and get out of bed and do stuff even though you know you’re going to hate yourself later at work when you’re all out of steam.

Just when you’re starting to wind down for the day you have to gear up for going to work.

All your Important meetings and such seem to start at midnight when you can barely think or see straight.

And then you have chipper people making snide remarks all the time like “wow look who’s still awake!” and “you’re not going to nod off on us are you?”

You spend most of your mid-shift break napping. By the time you get home from work there’s no way you’re cooking anything so you down a bag of chips in the car on the way home and immediately crash.

You tend to leave early a lot, for which you get reprimanded. People see you as lazy and irresponsible. They have no idea how much you can get done in a morning because you’re not allowed to do your job in the morning.

When you’re feeling focused and motivated, you have to instead be quiet and keep the lights off and not disturb everyone else who is responsibly getting their morning’s sleep. Also, nothing is open, so even though you totally want to get errands done before work, you can’t.

People are always telling you “just wake up 15 minutes later every day till you’ve adjusted.” as if you can stop the sunlight waking you up whenever it pleases to rise. “Buy black-out curtains” they say. “Maybe your doctor can give you sleep meds” they say. You read articles on your 'disorder' that provide minimal help and mainly serve to make you feel inhuman.

You chug coffee all evening trying to make it through.

You get headaches from squinting at things in the dark all the time.

Everyone always thinks you look aweful, you always feel aweful, except at 6am when you somehow magically are imbued with energy despite having had no sleep, perpetuating the cycle of getting up too early, not getting enough sleep, feeling like crap from noon onward.

You want to do things with people, but they always want to plan things late, so if you do go you leave early because you’re too tired to enjoy yourself. And then they say “Why couldn’t you just sleep in to plan for this.” Implying you are selfish and irresponsible, even if you did Try. If you attempt to negotiate an earlier time to meet up the response is begrudging and it's made clear how uncooperative you are.
 

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Okay. I figured out something very important.

Have you ever wanted to review all the threads you have made in the past? Maybe you want to bump a thread of yours, because, there is new information or a new book published -- like I am getting ready to do, with this thread - - - >> [INFP] - Books About INFPs

Do this:

  1. Click, in this forum, on the upper right corner (avatar picture).
  2. Click on "Following".
  3. Third tab marked "My Discussions", click on it.
  4. And there you go, all your threads throughout all of history.
 

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I'm running out of classes to register for university to delay the inevitable but I was like why not register for creative writing and/or art?

Then I realized that the institute probably wouldn't respect my writing or work. Maybe also not being able to work as freely as I want. Probably have to follow some framework or something. :cry:

And additionally in art class's case... I had to get my own supplies which kinda shows that art is a thing for more wealthier folks. :cautious:

Also even if I could get my own supplies those wealthier folk can just get better supplies so in essence it is a little bit um... Pay to Win? 🤪

They also wouldn't fit in my time schedule even if I went the hell with it. o_O

I was saving math and physics for last because I wasn't strong enough so I was a little bold and decided to take math or physics now that I have the opportunity. 🤪

But it turns out I can't take them because I am missing a previous math or physics class and that they wouldn't fit in my schedule anyway. 🙃

Ugh.. I can't realize my full potential at University with shenanigans like this... it feels like University is limiting my potential when ironically it is suppose to be more 'free' compared to high school whatever that means. :cautious:

At this point I wished I was back in high school.

I have no idea what I want to be or who I will become. I don't like papers and labs so what do I do? Plus my skills only cap so high. I cannot for the life of me do higher tier math and science. I'm only average in everything but I don't excel in anything at the moment. o_O

In vain I tried to search up a sword fighting class to see if one existed even though I know full well the result and yep there was no class results as expected. Maybe I wished deep down there was? 😂

😢 pained expression

There must be a class for just playing videogames instead? 😅

hah hah hah

I'm just fooling myself at this point. 😢

What did I do to deserve this? :cry:

I'm a good soul. I haven't stolen anything or hurt anybody. 😭

I just want to live happily even if I don't live like a prince and I don't need to. I honestly don't need much in life besides a good sword and toys and games. As my squire boy says in mocking that I'm just here for a good and fun time. 🥳

:cry:
🤧

I hope CESBs is extended so we can do things that we wouldn't or couldn't be able to do before. 🙃

I can only imagine the possibilities when we are allowed to realize our true potential. 🤩

I'm thinking of getting a naginata so I can be like Hana... A fake naginata though since I don't think Hana would want me to hurt anyone.

Not to mention I can swing it without endangering anyone or myself and it would be more fun whacking or poking stuff like I do with my foam weapons when I'm not handling real weapons. 🥰

...Please arrive soon universal basic income or fair share as I prefer to call it. I ain't getting any younger. Sadly my body is changing but unfortunately my mind stays the same. 🙁

A child in a man's body and soon an old man's body. 😬

Maybe it is best I don't understand? It is only real if I believe it is real right? This can't be real? Only the dream world in my head is real... Yes. Only that world is real everything else is fake... If I stay in this room no one can hurt me and I will be safe. I don't ever have to leave hah hah ha! 🤪

lol

I think I have gone a little crazy. ...Perhaps we have all gone crazy? Or maybe everyone else is crazy? I mean, a sane person looks insane to an insane society. Maybe I'm the only crazy one? :oops:

That is all for the melancholy of Roland #3 or was it #4?? I don't remember what number I am on. :oops:

Or should I call this a public freakout? 🤪

Don't worry I'll be back to normal in a few hours or when my mood resets every night. :giggle:

heh heh heh :giggle:
 

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I miss seeing my avatar in the icon for the threads I've already posted to. I've caught myself posting a comment to threads a second time. Oh well. Like some of this new format better.
 

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I miss seeing my avatar in the icon for the threads I've already posted to. I've caught myself posting a comment to threads a second time. Oh well. Like some of this new format better.
cricket just gave an answer on how to see when you posted, I have not tried myself yet (just hoping it won't give a thousand notifications, but worth a try)
 

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It's getting on my nerves that I don't feel confident about what I'm typed as. I keep going over the functions, but I can't help but think, "What if?" Well, maybe I'm not an INFP. Maybe I'm an INTP. No, maybe I'm an ISFP. Wait, maybe I'm an INFJ. So, I take tests like the following that don't actually convince me of my type. It's exasperating.


Te (Extroverted Thinking) (30%)
your valuation of / adherence to logic of external systems / hierarchies / methods

Ti (Introverted Thinking) (70%)
your valuation of / adherence to your own internally devised logic/rational

Ne (Extroverted Intuition) (70%)
your valuation of / tendency towards free association and creating with external stimuli

Ni (Introverted Intuition) (60%)
your valuation of / tendency towards internal/original free association and creativity

Se (Extroverted Sensing) (25%)
your valuation of / tendency to fully experience the world unfiltered, in the moment

Si (Introverted Sensing) (45%)
your valuation of / focus on internal sensations and reliving past moments

Fe (Extroverted Feeling) (40%)
your valuation of / adherence to external morals, ethics, traditions, customs, groups

Fi (Introverted Feeling) (75%)
your valuation of / adherence to the sanctity of your own feelings / ideals / sentiment
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
based on your results your type is likely - infp
 

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Just working on some of my ideas once I finished making a paper foam replica of Ayame (the white crystal sword that shines with the light of the sun!!) and Yoko (black steel sword that gleams the light of the stars). :)

I wished I could make them in foam, but I don't exactly know how... I would need a core and glue and um.. I wished I can create stuff with just my mind instead hah hah. Too much work for me. 😆

For 'Black Blood' I've decided for the ammunition to be in similar property to 'Deathsinger'. It also ties in to my idea of connecting my ideas to each other. Works kinda in the same way as rods do in Deathsinger. Basically a narrow cylinder with 10% of the rod being primer at the bottom as a thin layer and 90% of the rod being rod (also flat topped, but future rods long after Deathsinger's time have a shaped head like modern ammo in real life). Some of the rod is destroyed by the primer but the rest is sent out of the barrel as a fast moving projectile. After so many shots the residue from left over rods is dumped out of the firearm (the dust is cancerous so don't breath that stuff in!!)(also if you don't dump that stuff out your gun may explode or prematurely fire!). And that is the short explanation on how rods work.

In Black Blood the rods are ignited by just striking them from the hammer. In Deathsinger there are magic batteries that make the primer volatile before being struck by a sharp pin which ignites the primer.

Some rods include with a brief description:
 
'Rods of God' : "Experimental rod with a two stage mechanism. A certain distance is required for this rod to be effective. As the rod is flung, in mid flight and after a short distance the rod detonates in a large plume of smoke and light particles. Using this combined energy the rod fragments detonate again in midair sending a barrage of illuminated fragmentation soaring towards the target at blinding speed setting them and surrounding targets ablaze. Effective against creatures that fear the light and causes devastating damage to them by impaling them with spears of light." kinda like a dragon's breath in real life but much more dazzling and spectacular

'Barrier Rod' : "Rod found in the darkest depths of Yoelnam. There are bits of star fragments embedded in this rod. Firing this rod completely disintegrates the rod into a brightly colored cloud accompanied by numerous light particles. The cloud and particles produced by this rod lingers in the air and fall steadily to the ground. This rod does no damage but creates a temporary sanctuary to repel creatures that fear the light."

'Flash Rod' : "Rod with a special substance that completely disintegrates upon firing creating a large blinding flash of light. Does no damage but creative use allows a hunter to blind a creature momentarily to be able to captured, escaped from, or even to create distance."

'Silver Rod' : "Rod made from shifting metal from a magical lake underground beneath Yoelnam or so they say. Effective against fiends that fear silver. However, due to the weight of this metal, projectiles do not reach as far as a normal rod and travel slower in flight."

'Stake Impact Driver' : "Rod with a revolving miniaturized metal stake that rapidly burrows upon impact causing vicious wounding before exploding and splintering inside the target. A cruel weapon used by workshop hunters. The impaled corpses serve as crucifixion and as a warning. Effective against vampires and their kin. Absolutely devastating if such creatures are struck in the chest."

'Fragmented Rod' : "Rod that is fragmented beyond the primer and held loosely by resin. Used in scatter guns. When the primer is ignited the rod breaks apart and are sent outwards in a cone. Devastating at closer ranges and can stun large beasts at point blank range. Ineffective at a distance but can easily repel attacks."

'Shells' technically not a rod but shaped like a larger rod : "A special rod like ammunition loaded into special scatter guns. Used primarily by hunters of the church. These shells have small metal balls encased in hard paper and ignited by the same primer system as regular rods. The primer upon ignition expels the small metal balls outwards in a tight cone which destroys the paper casing and the paper cap holding the projectiles. Devastating at closer ranges and can stun even the mightiest beasts at point blank range. Longer range than fragmented rods and doing more damage than them but this ammunition is harder to parry with."

I also thought of two other ideas I call 'Katana Souls' and 'Gun Sword'. 🙂

Katana Souls is not related to the Souls games at all... The idea is basically collecting a bunch of katanas and summoning spirits out of them which is why it is called Katana Souls.

Here is what I have for now:
 
Two Weapon Types: Katana (element/spirit/style/property/flow) and Naginata

Katana/Naginata Types > Curved, Straight, Regular, Long, Short, Complex, Unique, Thick, Thin, Wide, Flexible, Hollow, Blunt, Piercing, Razor, Sharp, Super Curved, Rigid

Element (Main Property)
Physical (No Attribute, but can have physical only abilities)
Magical (Magic Damage)
Ignition (recoverable DoT [%HP])
Water (Reduce AP Speed)
Rain (Increase movement speed)
Wind (Reduce ATK and DEF)
Ground (Increase AP Consumption)
Gravity (%HP reduction)
Chaos (Reversal)
Grass (Critical Up)
Sound (AOE)
Glass (Weight down, but lower durability)
Blood (Bleed [DoT based on Movement])
Metal (Reduce guard and durability, but increase weight)
Crystal (Critical Up, but increase weight)
Stone (Slow)
Dark (Blindness/When HP% low...)
Light (Flash/When HP% high...)
Abyss/Hell (Life Leech)
Heaven/Divine (Life Recovery)
Life (% Self Revive)
Death (% Instant Death)
Poison (Rapid and Slow DoT [Set Damage])
Lightning (Stun)
Ice (Freeze)
Snow (Slow Action Speed)
Void/Ethereal (Ignore portion of DEF/Lock out)
Time (Reduce Cool down [self] and Increase Cool down [target])
Soul (Increase Action Speed, Affinity Up)
Corruption (Magical Leech/Lock out)
Purity/Innocence (Saving Throw, Affinity Up)

Spirit (Soul Drive)
May or not be same as element of katana. Summon spirit.

Style
Has affinity for style but may not be used for that specific style.

Sun (physical based) (difficult to learn), Unleash
Sun descended > Brave (physical based) > Brave descended > Honor (physical based)
Brave descended > Force (physical based)

Moon (magical based) (easier to learn), Quick Draw
Moon descended > Flower (physical based) > Flower descended > Zannin (physical based) > Zannin descended > Zennen (magical based)
Moon descended > Water (physical and magical based) > Water descended > Fate (magical based)

Property
May or may not have a trait. In addition may have a keyword trait.

Flow
Power
(Slower, but stronger attacks), Speed (Faster, but weaker attacks), Skill (Slower, but higher critical), Technical (Weaker, but higher status or critical), Balanced (Balance of positive or negative or neutral), Control (Weaker, but faster recovery), Spirit (Higher affinity and magical attacks, but weaker physical attacks), Heart (Lower magical attacks, but stronger physical attacks), Soul/Brave (Stronger physical and magical attacks, but increased AP and Affinity costs)

And lastly the Gun Sword idea is basically every sword has a gun attached to it. 😆

Though the idea is not just about swords despite being called Gun Sword, but there are other weapons like spears, hammers, axes, shields and various other weapons all of course with a various guns attached.

The idea is suppose to be a fluid interaction between melee and ranged combat like you can shoot in the middle of your sword swings which can reset your combo or extend it or to cancel it into a different action such as dodging or changing direction. Lots of acrobatic movements and back flipping too..

Still a relatively infant idea though.

And that is all I have to share for today for the random ideas I have cooking up. 🙂

heh heh heh :giggle:
 
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