Intense question, I know.. I'm in quite the pickle.
I'm pregnant. At least I'm about 85% sure I'm pregnant. I haven't had my period in over 5 weeks and everything I'm experiencing matches up with being pregnant. I took a test a week ago and it was negative, but I chalk that up to it being too early in my cycle so that the pregnancy hormones were too low to be detected.
Now, I know everyone is going to tell me to just take another test, but it seems unnecessary right now. I mean, if my period shows up, GREAT, questions answered.. but for the time being I'm approaching this as if I need to make a decision.
A little about me.. I'm 20 years old and still just going through university. I'm just a part time student (I only take 3 courses a semester) and I don't think it would be a huge deal for me to drop down to 1 or 2 courses next year after I would have my baby. I am single (my choice) and I know the father doesn't want a child. I currently live with 2 guys in an apartment down town.
So basically, I can't decide if I should have an abortion or keep the baby. If I kept the baby I would probably have to move back in with my parents (I adore my folks) so I could save the rent money on stuff for my baby. I honestly think I could still finish university after having a child if I continue living at home and only taking a partial course load. I feel like the child would be added motivation to get it done so that I can make a decent future for the two of us.
I'm not sure why I want to keep the baby, the idea of having this thing growing inside of me and then having a darling little child seems wonderful. I already have a cat that I love endlessly, and I can only imagine how deep my love would be for my own child. I feel like I'm at a pretty good place mentally and emotionally, and that I could make a really good mother, giving my child really good morals and teaching them how to be truly happy. Just the idea of being able to give all my love to my potential child makes me really think about keeping him/her.
One of the biggest reasons I have been thinking about abortion is how my peers will react. I know that I am only 20 years old, and I will probably get a lot of stares and rude looks if I start walking around the hallways with a big pregnant belly. I don't plan on getting back together with the father, and I don't want to have to face people asking me how I could have a baby on my own. If I could move away to where no one knows me, I would definitely keep the baby, but the thought of facing everyone's judgments is so scary!
And the idea of telling my parents is scary as well. I have no idea how they will react, I am fairly sure they would let me move back home so that they could help me. But they could also be extremely angry and tell me to abort the baby.. I've always said that if I got pregnant I would have an abortion (as it often seems like the best logical choice), but now that I am actually in this position the decision is much harder then I acted like it was. This is deciding if someone lives or not!
I'm pregnant. At least I'm about 85% sure I'm pregnant. I haven't had my period in over 5 weeks and everything I'm experiencing matches up with being pregnant. I took a test a week ago and it was negative, but I chalk that up to it being too early in my cycle so that the pregnancy hormones were too low to be detected.
Now, I know everyone is going to tell me to just take another test, but it seems unnecessary right now. I mean, if my period shows up, GREAT, questions answered.. but for the time being I'm approaching this as if I need to make a decision.
A little about me.. I'm 20 years old and still just going through university. I'm just a part time student (I only take 3 courses a semester) and I don't think it would be a huge deal for me to drop down to 1 or 2 courses next year after I would have my baby. I am single (my choice) and I know the father doesn't want a child. I currently live with 2 guys in an apartment down town.
So basically, I can't decide if I should have an abortion or keep the baby. If I kept the baby I would probably have to move back in with my parents (I adore my folks) so I could save the rent money on stuff for my baby. I honestly think I could still finish university after having a child if I continue living at home and only taking a partial course load. I feel like the child would be added motivation to get it done so that I can make a decent future for the two of us.
I'm not sure why I want to keep the baby, the idea of having this thing growing inside of me and then having a darling little child seems wonderful. I already have a cat that I love endlessly, and I can only imagine how deep my love would be for my own child. I feel like I'm at a pretty good place mentally and emotionally, and that I could make a really good mother, giving my child really good morals and teaching them how to be truly happy. Just the idea of being able to give all my love to my potential child makes me really think about keeping him/her.
One of the biggest reasons I have been thinking about abortion is how my peers will react. I know that I am only 20 years old, and I will probably get a lot of stares and rude looks if I start walking around the hallways with a big pregnant belly. I don't plan on getting back together with the father, and I don't want to have to face people asking me how I could have a baby on my own. If I could move away to where no one knows me, I would definitely keep the baby, but the thought of facing everyone's judgments is so scary!
And the idea of telling my parents is scary as well. I have no idea how they will react, I am fairly sure they would let me move back home so that they could help me. But they could also be extremely angry and tell me to abort the baby.. I've always said that if I got pregnant I would have an abortion (as it often seems like the best logical choice), but now that I am actually in this position the decision is much harder then I acted like it was. This is deciding if someone lives or not!