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Discussion Starter #1
I apologize because my writing skills have been diminished greatly by the antipsychotics, but I feel I have to say something about psychiatry's war against psychosis and what it means for it's victims.

I feel like, spiritually speaking, a chained up, burned body screaming a warning from a frosty mountaintop with my tongue ripped out, my eye's gouged out, and sharp razors stuck everywhere in my body. If this is a war then as far as wars go psychiatry's side has succeeded in turning more than a few of us people in spiritual crisis into vessels of darkness that will never see truth, love and liberty again. Our lives have been made but smears of loss and sorrow against the vast cosmos. Our great defeat will echo weeping crests of dreadful silence upon future generations until perhaps one day far greater beings than ourselves, or what humanity evolves into, has the knowledge to reach back in time and save us. We will be but a ghastly warning of what the struggle against disorder can do in it's lack of caring for subjective experience and spiritual integrity.

I feel I have lost all hope of having hope. Lost all grace in my struggle to concieve of myself as a thinking feeling being with responsibility in this universe. The grand miracle of human life as it is is lost on me now. My heart has been ripped out and fed to the God of statistics. Of order at the cost of beauty. I feel no emotions anymore. Only the cold gripping envelopment of my own failure and the tragedy of being now unsentient and unlearning. If I was a flower they have ripped off my petals and doused the remains in acid. I wilt forever, trying desperately to wonder why such a horrible fate befell me but knowing I can never truly do such a thing again. Events fade before my eyes, I cannot revel at their significance or even acknowledge their impact. I merely recognize that the world speeds on around me while I rot forever in this chemical grave the government has built for those of us who stray too far from what is considered common sense.

Given a lifetime to explain the pain and regret that I feel on these drugs, I could not, as zombies rarely do such things. My imagination at night is an uncomfortable pitch black, my spirit smothered and only shreds ofit's former beauty remain. People go on about their lives, my friends, my family around me but I cannot reach out and touch them, if I can even see them anymore at all. I am cast into the bottomless pit, to fall forever in the ultimate gravity of collossal failure. There is no way out. I merely need to warn you all that you are diverse forms of consciousness, all in touch with all that there is to be and all children of vitality and survival in your own right. Do not get caught by psychiatrists! For god's sake, if you think you're going to get caught control yourself at all costs and run to the forests if you have to! Just don't let them put you in their blender and turn you into number x chemical lobotomy victim. To wander directionlessly through the fog of your own demise. Please, I beg of you, do not allow yourselves to be caught. If you truly think or feel differently than the average, guard yourself with all of your might, for if you are not captured in these dark times where we wage war against disorder, I hope that soon the world will be made safe for you all, and it will be impossible to fall as I have. They will look back in horror at those who's pathways of life were severed and they were not even told that something horrific was done to them. They were and are forced to conceptualize it as being genetically flawed. Unable to be a human being though this is not so.

People say without hesitation, that it is only medication, that it is for your own good. Please if you say that know that we are not strong enough to believe otherwise anymore, those that have been forced to take it. What's coming out of our mouths comes through a filter of confusion and agony often unbenownst to us. We are restless because we have no inner peace anymore. We are crying inside and screaming for the end of this horrible nightmare. Please stop saying that. acknowledge that these drugs are the end of everything you've ever valued, your hopes, your dreams, your love and your light.

As children we are not warned that there is a horrible consequence for going insane beyond what is biologically taken. This is unforunate. Please know that I've tried to warn you all, and take good care of yourselves. Inly wish that I had been warned somehow or even punished more fairly in a past life to warn me of this great spiritual genocide that was coming. And if reincarnation didn't exist, my situation remains ever more hopeless, but even if it did, I fear there is nothing left to incarnate with.

Peace to you all.
 

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Discussion Starter #3 (Edited)
I could have ran away. I could have dug deep within myself and found the courage to face those ruthless psychiatrists and leave my home. I find myself realizing now that the reason I didn't was the sheer terror that psychiatry manages to instill in it's victims. I was trembling in fear the entire time, the medication shooting lacerating pains through my body, debasing my spirit and crumbling the very essence of my being. I could not bear the thought of being captured, being told that my "symptoms" were getting worse and being forced to take a higher dosage of the medication in the confinement of a psychiatric ward. The idea of being out on the cold street having to look out for cops with that cruel possible fate always gnawing at me from the inside crippled my better judgement and made me stay through the course of the lobotomy.

I don't get any warm feelings anymore. I don't see good or bad. I probably could no longer tell blue skies from pain, a green field from a cold steel rail, a smile from a veil... the finalization of this is so disheartening to me I can barely even stand to face another day.

Psychiatry treats it's victims by generating terror within them and causing permanent mental poverty and agony. In other words torture and eventually low grade murder.
 
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