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Maid of Time
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This is big news: I heard through the grapevine that the Pentagon (USA military) is planning to lift its ban on open transfolk in the military, similar to how DADT was lifted for LGB folks. This has ripple effects. This announcement will happen sometime around July 1?


glad it went good for you. I basically lost all of my friends through it :p
Yeah, my circle of family and friends diminished greatly and years later I have a completely different social circle. Not what I wished, and I've regained some old high school friends, but it's just how it goes. People have a hard time depending on the subculture.
 

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Oh my circle of family will diminish greatly. Fundamentalist chrstians in most cases, if the don't outright disown me they simply won't be worth being around.

I did just have a friend call me out of nowhere just because they thought I would like to hear them call me by name. I (platonically) love him so much. Made it hard not to cry instead of having a conversation.
 

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I keep seeing the memory I have of my friend, who had just put on a particular dress and was standing just inside her bedroom. If memory serves, black and grey horizontal stripes on the top part of the dress, solid black lower half. Morose look on her face. A look that implied to me that she felt defeated.

Toni Braxton couldn't hold a candle to you -- I'm pretty sure is what I was thinking, but I don't remember if I said it. Smiling- because, to me, nothing was out of place. Nothing was wrong with this picture. I saw my friend. I saw a pretty girl; She didn't. She couldn't see with my eyes. I'm sure that I impulsively hugged her. There would be a day that I would see her smiling, that she would be seeing what I had seen. I knew that we just had to wait. It's clear from the photos of her in the time since that she knows what I saw that day. She's even told me so, though that was some time ago. It's a happy realization that we got to share after a passage of time. So, I treasure it.
 
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Oh my circle of family will diminish greatly. Fundamentalist chrstians in most cases, if the don't outright disown me they simply won't be worth being around.

I did just have a friend call me out of nowhere just because they thought I would like to hear them call me by name. I (platonically) love him so much. Made it hard not to cry instead of having a conversation.
that's so sweet with your friend!
shit with the family ... those christians :(
 

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There's an acquaintance from high school who does cosplay with his twin brother. Anyway, he's insanely talented (no surprises there: they kicked ass in academics, sports, and socializing), so combined with his natural Asian gifts, can very well pass for a woman. It's hard to say if I'm more jealous or attracted, honestly, and asking would seem crass.

It could be a coincidence, but surely a male cosplayer *only* doing cosplays as female characters is a sign? After all, another transfeminine friend of mine said she would attend these sorts of events as a sort of "safe" way of going out and not having to worry over being harassed, or whatever.

*le sigh
 

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The No More Hero
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There's an acquaintance from high school who does cosplay with his twin brother. Anyway, he's insanely talented (no surprises there: they kicked ass in academics, sports, and socializing), so combined with his natural Asian gifts, can very well pass for a woman. It's hard to say if I'm more jealous or attracted, honestly, and asking would seem crass.

It could be a coincidence, but surely a male cosplayer *only* doing cosplays as female characters is a sign? After all, another transfeminine friend of mine said she would attend these sorts of events as a sort of "safe" way of going out and not having to worry over being harassed, or whatever.

*le sigh
Honestly, I don't think so. That would be like a woman cosplaying a man being a sign. It's more than just cosplay.
 

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Honestly, I don't think so. That would be like a woman cosplaying a man being a sign. It's more than just cosplay.
It may or may not be indicative of something, its impossible to say unless they come out eventually or something and then maybe you could say so in retrospect. Being trans is obviously more than cosplay, but a lot of times trans people will use outlets like that as "safe" ways to express themselves when they don't feel comfortable being open about their identities. That's certainly been my experience, though not with cosplay specifically. Of course it could also just be something they do for fun and it has no implications on their gender identity, I'm just sayin'.
 

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The No More Hero
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It may or may not be indicative of something, its impossible to say unless they come out eventually or something and then maybe you could say so in retrospect. Being trans is obviously more than cosplay, but a lot of times trans people will use outlets like that as "safe" ways to express themselves when they don't feel comfortable being open about their identities. That's certainly been my experience, though not with cosplay specifically. Of course it could also just be something they do for fun and it has no implications on their gender identity, I'm just sayin'.
I don't think cosplay should be use an indicative, though, or cross dress in general. Of course, if you come out it will make "more sense", but if you don't it's just fine. I reckon that cosplay is more about liking a character or popular characters than self expression but I can be proven wrong.
 

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Expressing your love for a character and expressing yourself are the same thing. Still doesn't make someone trans, just nit picking.
Well, it's been several different characters, and they're ALL female. I don't know too many guys who do that, so I'm a little suspicious/hopeful. Meanwhile, his twin does mostly/all male characters.
 

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The No More Hero
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Expressing your love for a character and expressing yourself are the same thing. Still doesn't make someone trans, just nit picking.
Well, sometimes, yes. I absolutely LOVE Artorias the Aybsswalker from Dark Souls. I would love to cosplay as him. Do I consider it an expression of my own identify? No, it's an expression of my love for the game and the character. I hardly identify with Artorias and many other characters I like. It can be the case for some people and characters, but for others I doubt it. Either case is true.
 

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I don't think cosplay should be use an indicative, though, or cross dress in general. Of course, if you come out it will make "more sense", but if you don't it's just fine. I reckon that cosplay is more about liking a character or popular characters than self expression but I can be proven wrong.
Yeah I wouldn't say it is indicative of anything in general. I'm just saying sometimes someone who is trans, particularly closeted, might use it as an outlet when they can't otherwise express themselves the way they want in everyday life. Halloween could be another example, or really just about anyone who cross dresses in a context where they can still have "plausible deniability" about their gender identity. Like even though its definitely not the majority some people who do drag eventually come out as trans.
 

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The No More Hero
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Yeah I wouldn't say it is indicative of anything in general. I'm just saying sometimes someone who is trans, particularly closeted, might use it as an outlet when they can't otherwise express themselves the way they want in everyday life. Halloween could be another example, or really just about anyone who cross dresses in a context where they can still have "plausible deniability" about their gender identity. Like even though its definitely not the majority some people who do drag eventually come out as trans.
Yeah, that's what I mean. It could be but maybe not. Who knows right? Sometimes not even we know what's going on in our own heads.
 

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Your love for a character is part of you is it not? Therefor, expressing that love is expressing yourself. It's not to say you identify with Atrorias, I don't identify with Rikku, but what characters I like and (more importantly) why I like them is very much a product and part of who I am. Expressing that affection is, by extension, expressing myself. What I want, what I admire, what I can relate to, what I find pleasurable to interact with, what I find interesting to think about, what I find attractive, these are all most definitely part of who I am and all expressed in my love for any given character. If I express that love, I express those things. Not necessarily directly, but that doesn't mean it isn't happening.

If I cosplay as Chie, because I fucking love Chie, I'm by defualt expressing how much I value whatever qualities she has that I like.



More on topic, yeah, cosplay (and halloween and books and videogames) are all easy outs for people to express their gender in a relatively safe space and not send up red flags. That's what I did. It doesn't necessarily mean they're trans though, stastically it almost certainly doesn't mean they're trans because that's a hilariously small group of people % wise. Remember there was a time not all that long ago (and it still happens quite a lot) where female roles in plays and stuff were played exclusively by men. If you decide to consider cosplay a performance art (which would be perfectly reasonable) then it's not really rare.
 

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The No More Hero
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Your love for a character is part of you is it not?
Yes but it's not identification. I'm not a sad armoured old man. I wish I was, but I'm not that cool.

Therefor, expressing that love is expressing yourself.
In a way yes, but I don't see it as expressing my identity. That would be cosplaying Solaire. Yeah... Bros until the end.
(I wish I was joking)

why I like them is very much a product and part of who I am
I understand what I mean, and I agree, but I don't quite see it as an expression of my identify as much as an expression of love.

If I cosplay as Chie, because I fucking love Chie, I'm by defualt expressing how much I value whatever qualities she has that I like.
But Naoto is the best girl...
(Now I'm joking you can hit me now)

Seriously, I understand what you mean and I agree, but I see it differently because I don't identify with a lot of characters and a lot the characters I like are not very good people. I absolutely adore No More Heroes, a game filled with horrible people, and Drakengard, another game filled with horrible people doing horrible things, and because if that I cannot see them like that. I like them because they're well written or give the feels or are interesting and not always because I identify with them. Your opinion isn't any less valid because I happen to like complete assholes.


I love you Travis <3
 

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I'm a pansexual female.

Androgyny is super hot. Just wanted to drop that in this thread.

;)
 
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Missed the full implications of this post, why hopeful?
*shrugs* It would be pretty awesome to find out someone I went to school with turned out to be transfeminine. So far, I've only met a handful from out of town at local meet ups.
 

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Why would you wish this on anybody?

I dearly hope they're just a guy who thinks it's fun to dress as a woman. Nobody deserves to go though anything even remotely resembling what I have over the last 18 months. If it turns out they are then be happy that they can be true to themselves, but hoping that they are makes it look (to me) like you haven't thought at all about the experience they have to have had for that to be true.
 
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