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Hi, everyone! This is my first post here on Personality Café. I've been lurking for a couple of years, though.

I was wondering how my fellow INFPs feel about traveling with other people. I'm babysitting for a family that wants me to help them out on a vacation for two days. It's four hours from my neighborhood, and while I'm going to take the train to their vacation spot, I have to ride with them in a car for the return trip. I also have Type 1 diabetes, which can be very hard to manage during travel. I mean, I can do it, but it adds a sense of dread.

All in all, I get upset about the prospect of traveling with other people. I think I have an issue with stepping beyond my comfort zone. Also, I hate not having any control over a situation.

Do any of you feel the same way? Or is it just me?
 

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Hello!
I totally get the whole comfort zone thing- my comfort zone has already passed just being around people sometimes. And it makes alot of sense if you have diabetes too. On the flip side though, I love being able to help other people out if they don't expect me to be a social butterfly or anything. I love to listen and observe and just be around people. It really depends on who it is but I love giving everybody a chance. Sometimes I love it, sometimes I hate it. Life always goes on though.
 

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Although I dislike not having control over the situation sometimes, I realized that I'm not always going to be able to and sometimes I'm more comfortable with that. The outcome will usually depend on the way I choose to take things in a given situation, so I try to approach them in a positive way. As for stepping out of my comfort zone, I have to really force myself to do that and sometimes it's beneficial. For example: I recently signed up for a thing at my school where I'm going to be forced to meet new people which is absolutely nerve wracking for me, but I figured that if I put myself in these situations that are outside my comfort zone, I will eventually adapt to them and it wont be as much of a problem.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Although I dislike not having control over the situation sometimes, I realized that I'm not always going to be able to and sometimes I'm more comfortable with that. The outcome will usually depend on the way I choose to take things in a given situation, so I try to approach them in a positive way. As for stepping out of my comfort zone, I have to really force myself to do that and sometimes it's beneficial. For example: I recently signed up for a thing at my school where I'm going to be forced to meet new people which is absolutely nerve wracking for me, but I figured that if I put myself in these situations that are outside my comfort zone, I will eventually adapt to them and it wont be as much of a problem.
I quite agree that much of it depends on how one chooses beforehand to adapt to any new surroundings!
 

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I usually fear going beyond my comfort zone as well, but I tell myself that the experience will be worth it.

When I go to a place I haven’t been to before, I usually mitigate the fear by researching and planning beforehand until I feel that adequate preparations have been done.

Find out more about the surroundings in the vacation spot you’re going to. Maybe there’s a park/beach/lake nearby that you can escape to for some quiet time. Or even a library or museum. Inform the family beforehand that you might need a little time to unwind and enjoy nature so they can let you be by yourself when the kids are napping or otherwise occupied.

Bring along a book and music player. Even a small five minute break listening to music recharges me immensely. You could do it in the toilet if there’s really no place to run to.

A new place can be overwhelming, so it helps to bring a familiar item along for me as something I can return to after a long day. Maybe a stuffed toy or something else, even a piece of jewelry or trinket.

Traveling is always fun for me, as long as I don’t get stressed out with tight schedules. But sometimes a little structured free time is good too. It might help to check with the family the times and events they absolutely need you around for, and then you can have the rest of the time by yourself. That way, you’ll have more control over the situation without stepping too suddenly out of your comfort zone, since you can mentally prepare for the things they might be doing.

Hope you have fun! :D
 

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Discussion Starter #7
The family ended up canceling for this weekend, which is unfortunate because I lost some much-needed money; on the other hand, preparing for the experience I thought would come to pass has given me time to reflect on how difficult it can be for me not to feel in control of things. I expect that when such an opportunity comes around again, I shall feel readier to face it without worrying so much. For the last few days, I've been trying to step outside of my comfort zone, and have found it quite helpful in feeling stronger.
 

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I have come to hate travelling with other people. Solo travel is the only way to travel. There is actually peace during vacation instead of arguments/disagreements over stupid things.
 

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Your thinking mind will convince you of so many mistruths, if it is negative it doesn't exist, you created it so stop believing it, they hired you to look after their children, I'm guessing they like and trust you, you can do anything you set your mind to, you know it and I know it, stop selling yourself short. A weekend with people who trust you with their children's well-being, you can do that with eyes closed .
 

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I can totally relate. I think traveling with people I don't know really well is one of my most dreaded activities. I LOOOOVE to travel, but a lot of travelers aren't really respectful of fellow travelers' needs. And we INFPs kind of throw our needs to the wayside to make everyone else happy, and that just makes for a shitty traveling experience for ourselves.

I think you've gotten some good advice. All I wanted to say is that you're not alone!!
 
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