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MOTM Nov 2009
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Self-pres/Social

This subtype is the least volatile and fiery of the type Four stackings. They can resemble type One in terms of their efficiency and practicality. Although their focus will be more on the emotional aesthetic, these Fours do have a considerable practical side. Less flashy than some of the subtypes of Four, they nevertheless have a quiet charm and developed sense of style. They are likely to value their possessions, to perhaps collect items of personal emotional significance. They may, for instance, have shelves and shelves of books and have a place for each book. This subtype can also resemble type Six in terms of having a great deal of anxiety. This anxiety often revolves around self-pres concerns such as those surrounding health issues and mortality. Their strong self-pres instinct also lends a degree of independence to this subtype. As the sexual instinct is least pronounced, this subtype of Four is prone to romanticize intimacy without actually pursuing real relationships. When healthy, these Fours can be very productive; when less healthy they might suffer from boughts of melancholy or self pity. The strong self-pres instinct however often helps these individuals to recognize how their state of mind is impacting their health and well being. This enables them to become action oriented.


Self/Sexual

This subtype also cares very much about their surroundings and their possessions. They feel as if these things help to express who they are. There is more of a passionate sense about them as compared to the self/soc. They have more of a sensual relationship with their environment. These Fours are much more tortured by their difficulty with respect to maintaining close relationships. The self-preservationist instinct tends to be in conflict with the sexual instinct, causing this subtype to habitually analyze their relationships to the point where they find it difficult to be present to them. When unhealthy, these Fours can become very disdainful of the social environment. They also start to envy the ease with which others seem to form relationships and maintain friendships. When Fours of this subtype are healthy, they find that they can form relationships without feeling as though they are sacrificing authenticity. They no longer feel that they have to automatically define themselves as "different from others," as outside the group. They are able to see the ways in which their emotionality might cloud their better judgment and to use that insight to establish equilibrium.
 

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MOTM Nov 2009
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Discussion Starter #2
Social/Self-pres

This subtype can mimic type One when it comes to social values. They can be harsh critics of the current mores. They have romantic ideals of what the world should be like; reality always falls short. Ironically, this type can be the most withdrawn of the Fours. Social anxiety combines with the Four's shame issues to make this type feel that the pressure associated with "fitting in" is just not worth it. They are also the most likely of the Fours to intellectualize their emotions and in this way resemble type Five.

The social instinct tends to give the personality a focus on being included, fitting in, or finding a way to make a valued contribution. This agenda conflicts with the Four's sense of being "different from" or "other than." The Four's need to establish a separate identity conflicts with the social instinct's drive towards inclusion. The social Four often deals with this dilemma by defining themselves as being outside the social system. By defining themselves always in terms of the system, even if it is to establish distance, this Four stays essentially tied to it. Fours with the social/self-pres stacking tend to acutely feel a sense of social shame at not quite belonging.

When this subtype is reasonably healthy, they are often gifted critics of the prevailing culture. They develop true insight into social dynamics and have an eye for the nuances and subtleties of social interactions. Many Four writers are soc/self.

Social/Sexual

This is overall the "lightest" type Four when it comes to social interaction. They are likely to utilize charm and humor. This type is more scattered and can be down right disorganized. They can drift through life always feeling like an outsider, yet they usually have friends. They can alternate from being the life of the party to withdrawing. Intimates will know of their insecurities and dark moody side while acquaintances will see a softer, friendlier side. This subtype’s energy is geared towards people, but they never feel as though they really fit in. They are often quite creative, talented people who have many interests, but they frequently lack the energy to actually accomplish what they would like. They can drift and withdraw very easily. When healthy and with the right support from friends (and perhaps a little push) they tap into their instinctual energy. When they do this, they begin to see how much they can accomplish. A positive connection to others helps them stay focused.
 

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MOTM Nov 2009
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Discussion Starter #3
Sexual/Self-pres

This is a very volatile type. They are driven to form connections but have very high demands of their partners. When their powerful fantasies don’t match reality, they become very restless. They take the fire and passion of the sexual instinct and turn it inward. This can cause both brooding and fiery outbursts. Dramatic mood swings are very likely with this type. This subtype of Four could be considered the most classic Four, because of the way they seem to embody the archetype of the tortured artist, although not all Fours of this subtype are artists. Stereotype aside, this subtype does tend to bring their emotions into focus more readily then the other subtypes of Four. What is under the surface with the self-pres/sexual is now bubbling to the surface. This subtype can resemble type Seven because of their drama, passion for experience and tendency to suffer from frustration when life seems dull. Like type Seven, they can seem to throw themselves into experience.

When healthy, this subtype learns to balance the need for passion with the less obvious need for groundedness which can come from solid and focused relationships with others and with their creative outlets.



Sexual/Social

This subtype is able to connect with others and with life itself, but always with an undertone of volatility and a tendency to dramatize. They are the most involved and connected of the subtypes of Four. They can go from relationship to relationship, seemingly tortured by each one. They are the most driven of the subtypes of Four to express themselves publicly and type Four celebrities are commonly found with this stacking. This subtype has a real difficulty remaining grounded, partly due to the undeveloped self-pres instinct. Although they can appear almost Eight-like at times with their lust for life and desire for passionate experience, they lack the focus of the Eight and the instinctual energy that would keep them grounded. Sometimes alcohol or substance abuse can be a problem. These Fours become more healthy when they learn to control their impulsiveness and focus their energies.

[Source]
 

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ok...my first is type 4 social while my second highest is type 9 social. the third is self-preservation but it's type 6. Should I assume that I'm social/self-preservation?
 

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MOTM Nov 2009
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Discussion Starter #9
If that's what fits you, then yes. Just don't accept the results of a test without checking the description and seeing that it's like you, though. Many people mistype in that fashion.
 

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Well, I'm a sx/sp all right. I think the drama is something that I like and I can't help at the same time. I never liked to cause drama with my own self, but I would revel in other people's drama. High school is my closest example of this. It was almost a compulsion to try to get dirt on people and just bask in the knowledge I'd have. I didn't like to start things with people, but I would love to sit there in class knowing I knew secrets that they only wanted their closest friends to know. Its sick I know but its what made high school interesting for me.
 

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Thanks Grey.
I found that site a while ago too, and have enjoyed reading through it. Great find. :happy:
 

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Social/Sexual

This is overall the "lightest" type Four when it comes to social interaction. They are likely to utilize charm and humor. This type is more scattered and can be down right disorganized. They can drift through life always feeling like an outsider, yet they usually have friends. They can alternate from being the life of the party to withdrawing. Intimates will know of their insecurities and dark moody side while acquaintances will see a softer, friendlier side. This subtype’s energy is geared towards people, but they never feel as though they really fit in. They are often quite creative, talented people who have many interests, but they frequently lack the energy to actually accomplish what they would like. They can drift and withdraw very easily. When healthy and with the right support from friends (and perhaps a little push) they tap into their instinctual energy. When they do this, they begin to see how much they can accomplish. A positive connection to others helps them stay focused.

this variant is very dead on.
thank you grey.

do some variants have more chances of having a particular wing than others?
is I am So/sx <--i think that's right

4w5 or 4w3 or just four?
 

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Discussion Starter #13
I assume you could say there's a potential tendency based on the description, but no, I don't believe that some Fours with certain instinctual variants are moreso one wing over the other.
 

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Social/Sexual

This is overall the "lightest" type Four when it comes to social interaction. They are likely to utilize charm and humor. This type is more scattered and can be down right disorganized. They can drift through life always feeling like an outsider, yet they usually have friends. They can alternate from being the life of the party to withdrawing. Intimates will know of their insecurities and dark moody side while acquaintances will see a softer, friendlier side. This subtype’s energy is geared towards people, but they never feel as though they really fit in. They are often quite creative, talented people who have many interests, but they frequently lack the energy to actually accomplish what they would like. They can drift and withdraw very easily. When healthy and with the right support from friends (and perhaps a little push) they tap into their instinctual energy. When they do this, they begin to see how much they can accomplish. A positive connection to others helps them stay focused.

this variant is very dead on.
thank you grey.

do some variants have more chances of having a particular wing than others?
is I am So/sx <--i think that's right

4w5 or 4w3 or just four?
It's so crazy how that describes me so well.
 

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I assume you could say there's a potential tendency based on the description, but no, I don't believe that some Fours with certain instinctual variants are moreso one wing over the other.
thank you. I have found the enneagram a bit more helpful than the MBTI.
and seriously thanks again grey. Everyone says you are very helpful and It is cool to see that in action.:)
 

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I guess we are twins !

yeah... especially the part about the closer people get the more they know that darkside of us.
Haha, I guess we are ;)
Yeah, and I feel that I've pushed my closer friends away from me... :|
 

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I've been trying to figure out my stacking for ages and I still have no idea. I relate to sp/sx, sp/so and so/sp :S

I'm wondering whether the extra withdrawn aspect of my personality has more to do with so or sp.

Some of the confusion lies in the fact that I am most comfortable with one-on-one friendships, but that doesn't mean I'm not sx last, as sx is more about awarenss of chemistry and energy opposed to the so way of connecting- being able to relate to each other and feel like you belong. It feels more comforting and homely rather than exciting. Much of my insecurity lies in the fact that I seem to lack that sx charisma and forward determination when it comes to pursuing relationships, and will settle for daydreaming instead.

I deleted the rest of my post bc for every argument I had for being a certain type, I could think of something else which counteracted it. :/
 

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I most identify with self-pres/social, followed by self-pres/sexual. I was particularly interested by the type 6 overtones in the 1st, because that is my 2nd closest type. It's so hard when both of your two closest types are melodramaticists - this is one thing I am working on calming down!
 
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