[Dancingintruth]

I'm still pretty much a newbie at the whole Personality type thing so I need a bit of help. Thanks! :tongue:
Oh and btw, we are only still teenagers, he(and me) will change alot over the years most likely... So don't expect us to be set-in-stone types. Ya catch my drift? *this post is really random, I apologize for my scatter brain ways*

Alright so I am pretty much 100% sure my Boyfriend is Extroverted. He has many many friends (most of which make me uncomfortable because I feel like I'm boring compared to at least 10 of the 239841-exaggeration)

He always jokes around not just to have fun but for some of the social label of "being funny"
I suppose thats how he learned as a kid to get attention cause I knew him for 3 years before we dated.
He's one of those people who use the jokes that are from the media,(a "thats what she said" kind of remark) yet everyone still finds them funny after the millionth time.

So extroverted, check! Now I have trouble labeling him as everything else...

Being his girlfriend, I see many sides of him that others don't, I suppose. We have been dating for 7 months and we have never once had a big disagreement. Even when we have a disagreement we just joke about it, never focusing on it.

So far, he has been extremely different than when I first started "talking"(almost dating) him. He used to seem like a player, he had many girlfriends previous to me and I always felt like the 2nd choice out of many other girls. He made promises he never fulfilled and would pretty much ignore/ditch me whenever he felt like focusing on another girl(I put up with it dang well) When we actually seriously "talked" I was scared we would have a 2 week pointless relationship that was only physical... boy was I wrong... (sorry for my ranting)

Although he's extroverted with everyone else he's mostly increasingly more quiet with me. I guess he is afraid sometimes to say everything he usually does cause he wants to be the best person for me? can't tell if he's thinking of feeling. Most likely Feeling, since he molds himself to fit whoever he is talking to. Not too much of the "do it my way" guy. But he isn't necessarily aiming to please, I think he just has this need to be liked by everyone so he does whatever he can to not step on too many toes. Unless he strongly dislikes that person, then he just sticks to his own ways.

But he isn't too much of a push-over. He just knows when to bite his tongue I guess.

-Whichever type this pertains to in the conflict/problem solving area...

I tend to brush any conflict under the rug, I get so shooken up by 'talking about it" kind of stuff. While he is the "we need to talk about it now to solve it" kind of person. I was really surprised by that. (about the specific problem we were focusing on) He said it's because he wanted our relationship to last, and didn't want to mess it up/break up for a reason that wasn't actually worth it.
-So does that mean he is only like that with me because of my relationship with him? Its hard to separate his natural tendency to how he is with me.

Moving on! sort of...

He has an excellent memory, I think he likes to focus on details of people well details of anything really. It's sappy but "the little things" kind of guy. The other day he pointed out how different red and green apples were, with the randomest specific details... haha. So he's probably Sensing? Is that right?



I'm also confused because he seems very focused some days and very "out of it" the next. I used to think his personal feelings weren't very deep because he only reveals them seldomly. But at often times I'm surprised by how much he really is thinking of emotional or long term things. But at the same time, half of the time he makes no sense. He seems like a saying before thinking kind of person- just to end the silence.

He's pretty stubborn when it comes to his fears and dislikes. He hates planes and certain foods, and just refuses to try those foods or ride a plane unless he absolutely has to. He isn't controlling over the situation when "refusing", usually tries to bring humor into it.


* If there are any other questions about him, feel free to ask! Thanks! :happy:

 

[Sedem]

@Dancingintruth


I get a T vibe, especially with the way he handles conflict/problems. Though if he's a type 8, it could come from that as well.

This is conflicting info, though, and makes it hard for me to tell:
"he is the "we need to talk about it now to solve it" kind of person"
" Even when we have a disagreement we just joke about it, never focusing on it."


I wouldn't pin the apple thing to a sensing type. I do the same thing, so perhaps we could say it's related to Se, but I feel like I've seen plenty of Ni or Ne doms do a similar thing. I almost want to say that sensing types would be more likely to just enjoy the experience vs wanting to express their observations. I could be wrong. Only about 30% of my friends are sensing types, so I may not have been able to observe enough yet.

The humor thing is common for Ne dominants, but also for type 7s.

I get a P vibe because of how free form he seems, how long it took him to decide he wanted you, but once he did he seems pretty serious about it in comparison to the other gals, also the focused one day/out of it the next.

What did you mean by this? "half of the time he makes no sense"
And perhaps you could explain about his emotional range/how his emotions surface more?
Also, what are his interests/how does he spend his free time?

 

[ThatOneWeirdGuy]

You guys sound really young, so like you said, this probably isn't set in stone.

I see loads and loads of sensing, probably extroverted sensing. I also saw some kind of feeling. At first I thought it might be extroverted, but the sensing seems so strong the way you described. He knows how to make people laugh and is a 'player,' so he's in tune with emotions. I'm not sure, that's little to go off of. What did you mean when you said he's sometimes more quiet around you? Does he seem uncomfortable or calm? How close is he to you compared to other people, on a scale of 1-10? Think about that from his perspective, not yours. Also, when he's up front about 'talking' about something, how does he go about trying to solve the problem? What about other non-relationship problems?

Right now, my hunch is SeFiTeNi (ESFP) or SeTiFeNi (ESTP)

 

[Dancingintruth]

@Zadriela
Thanks for the quick reply!
Yeah I know some of the info I got was misleading. Sorry I forgot how the situations were different at the time-
When I say we joke about problems, it's like the little problems we joke about a.k.a. not liking the same genres of music or types of food. Little things(I just say this cause I know some people who focus alot of small disagreements, aka not us)

But when he displays the "we need to talk" it's when its about a big difference we have in thought process, like talk about something that makes me more stand off-ish. Like if someone says he's cheating on me and he hears about it, he doesn't hesitate to reassure me and try to talk about if I have doubt in the relationship, etc. Or if we feel like things are moving too fast, he wants to set rules so he doesn't over-step them. If that makes sense?

When I say "he doesn't make sense, half of the time" Well he seems to have scattered thoughts 90% the time. (I also share this trait when i feel energized) Not in a negative way.... But say for example he just makes odd connections in life, like talking about the ocean then he says something about peanut butter. I will be like "where the heck did you come up with that?" Then he will explain..." well one time I ate peanut butter at the beach so I thought of how its made and then asked you about it....." (that didn't actually happen, but a lot of things like this situation do haha) :crazy:

His emotions surface more, I sense, when he thinks I am kinda withdrawing myself (I think I'm type 9 so i definitely do that alot)
Like reassuring me that he's in it(relationship) for the long haul.
But since he doesn't tell me everything, I don't know what's going through his mind, so he could just be reflecting on how he is disappointed that he doesn't see me on the weekend or something and he just randomly says something emotional about if he lost me.

He seems to say how he is feeling more often then showing it when I'm with him. I think he's only short-tempered with people that he doesn't care what they think about him like his family, or in sports.
But in more reserved like public places when he's really upset I can see the dimness of his energy cause normally he's really energetic. Plus I'm really empathetic and super sensitive to him(cause i care about him duh) its like 10-fold of me noticing/feeling how he's upset. So I'm kinda biased.

-Oh and he gets kinda temperamental when compared to his brother(which is a twin) which I can understand, they are always being compared. He wants to make sure he is the more likable twin, so he can get kinda cocky when that subject is brought up.
Sorry I talk so much :laughing:

His interests... Well he's very very sporty, plays soccer mainly but good with most any sport. That explains why he's so energetic.
He also plays 2 instruments and has a big family so always doing something with them no matter how much he says he's annoyed by them. He's really religiously based and does alot of church stuff. And like I said he's pretty socially flexible.

Thanks again!

@Dancingintruth


I get a T vibe, especially with the way he handles conflict/problems. Though if he's a type 8, it could come from that as well.

This is conflicting info, though, and makes it hard for me to tell:
"he is the "we need to talk about it now to solve it" kind of person"
" Even when we have a disagreement we just joke about it, never focusing on it."


I wouldn't pin the apple thing to a sensing type. I do the same thing, so perhaps we could say it's related to Se, but I feel like I've seen plenty of Ni or Ne doms do a similar thing. I almost want to say that sensing types would be more likely to just enjoy the experience vs wanting to express their observations. I could be wrong. Only about 30% of my friends are sensing types, so I may not have been able to observe enough yet.

The humor thing is common for Ne dominants, but also for type 7s.

I get a P vibe because of how free form he seems, how long it took him to decide he wanted you, but once he did he seems pretty serious about it in comparison to the other gals, also the focused one day/out of it the next.

What did you mean by this? "half of the time he makes no sense"
And perhaps you could explain about his emotional range/how his emotions surface more?
Also, what are his interests/how does he spend his free time?

 

[All in Twilight]

Exxx-boyfriend.

ESTP 7w8

Not the best match for an ENFJ

 

[glaba]

"His interests... Well he's very very sporty, plays soccer mainly but good with most any sport. That explains why he's so energetic."

Definitely seems like an ESTP

"we need to talk"
perhaps this is his auxilary Ti surfacing?

There are probably a lot more examples that you mentioned. These are just a few. But I definitely get an ESTP feel, like others said.

 

[Dancingintruth]

@ThatOneWeirdGuy
We are 15, so I hope you don't think we are like 11. Cause Thought process wise.... I am nothing like I was 4 years ago.
Besides that... Now when I say he knows how to make people laugh, I feel like it's more of a "monkey see monkey do" behavior. He uses, mostly, just the things that are funny in modern culture like jokes from common tv shows or something. Doesn't require too much of his own input usually.
And the reason why I think our relationship is working out enormously better than the others is because we kind of benefit from eachothers differences, No offense but I did have to hint to him how to not be so "annoyingly pickup line winking" kind of guy if he wanted to actually date me. I am only flattered by complete honesty. And his other relationships literally lasted at the most about 3 weeks... and somehow we are going on 8 months. So yeah, big difference.
So him being emotionally tuned... ehh not so much, he picks up the wrong signals from people and then processes them to extremes. Like He'll say "Sally said this rude thing so now I think she hates me." When I realise that isn't true, he just kind of jumps to conclusions sometimes.

-His quietness...
Well he isn't uncomfortably quiet, just more of the calm go with the flow quiet. He doesn't want to make me upset I guess so he holds back alot sometimes.... Which makes me confused cause I'm just as "go with the flow" as he is... I don't ever call out people if they make me upset anyway. I think he's just used to dating people who blow up on him for small reasons...I know all of his exes.... :dry:


The closeness of him to me...
From his perspective... pretty much 10. well he's blatantly said "I trust you more than anyone in the world.", "you don't understand how much you mean to me" Most of that sappy stuff, but he only says it when he's in one of his emotional days. Now me being (I think) a 9, I don't really believe the whole anyone "trusts" me kind of thing. But how close he is compared to everyone else, it comes with the normal relationship stuff, knowing his secrets and fears and quirks. I don't think he blatantly tell other people that.

- His "upfront talking" about stuff.
Well I can't say much cause we don't have many problems... But he faces it pretty head on, since we aren't together all the time he said we can talk about it right after *insert next opportunity where we both aren't busy* He asks how I feel about it or he tells me if he's worrying about that problem. Or apologizes if he thinks he did something wrong. It's a good thing as in not too pushy, because I avoid conflict where he wants to fix it. He said he wants the relationship to last so we shouldn't ignore anything.

-His way to solve Non relationship problems...
I'm not too sure cause once again I'm biased, And he doesn't complain a lot about his problems, well he doesn't tell me about it too much. I think he just talks through them mostly, tries to word his way out of awkward situations. I have to think about observing him in that aspect more I guess..

Thanks again, sorry I type so much ahah!:happy:

You guys sound really young, so like you said, this probably isn't set in stone.

I see loads and loads of sensing, probably extroverted sensing. I also saw some kind of feeling. At first I thought it might be extroverted, but the sensing seems so strong the way you described. He knows how to make people laugh and is a 'player,' so he's in tune with emotions. I'm not sure, that's little to go off of. What did you mean when you said he's sometimes more quiet around you? Does he seem uncomfortable or calm? How close is he to you compared to other people, on a scale of 1-10? Think about that from his perspective, not yours. Also, when he's up front about 'talking' about something, how does he go about trying to solve the problem? What about other non-relationship problems?

Right now, my hunch is SeFiTeNi (ESFP) or SeTiFeNi (ESTP)

 

[ThatOneWeirdGuy]

@ThatOneWeirdGuy
We are 15, so I hope you don't think we are like 11. Cause Thought process wise.... I am nothing like I was 4 years ago.
Besides that... Now when I say he knows how to make people laugh, I feel like it's more of a "monkey see monkey do" behavior. He uses, mostly, just the things that are funny in modern culture like jokes from common tv shows or something. Doesn't require too much of his own input usually.
And the reason why I think our relationship is working out enormously better than the others is because we kind of benefit from eachothers differences, No offense but I did have to hint to him how to not be so "annoyingly pickup line winking" kind of guy if he wanted to actually date me. I am only flattered by complete honesty. And his other relationships literally lasted at the most about 3 weeks... and somehow we are going on 8 months. So yeah, big difference.
So him being emotionally tuned... ehh not so much, he picks up the wrong signals from people and then processes them to extremes. Like He'll say "Sally said this rude thing so now I think she hates me." When I realise that isn't true, he just kind of jumps to conclusions sometimes.

-His quietness...
Well he isn't uncomfortably quiet, just more of the calm go with the flow quiet. He doesn't want to make me upset I guess so he holds back alot sometimes.... Which makes me confused cause I'm just as "go with the flow" as he is... I don't ever call out people if they make me upset anyway. I think he's just used to dating people who blow up on him for small reasons...I know all of his exes.... :dry:


The closeness of him to me...
From his perspective... pretty much 10. well he's blatantly said "I trust you more than anyone in the world.", "you don't understand how much you mean to me" Most of that sappy stuff, but he only says it when he's in one of his emotional days. Now me being (I think) a 9, I don't really believe the whole anyone "trusts" me kind of thing. But how close he is compared to everyone else, it comes with the normal relationship stuff, knowing his secrets and fears and quirks. I don't think he blatantly tell other people that.

- His "upfront talking" about stuff.
Well I can't say much cause we don't have many problems... But he faces it pretty head on, since we aren't together all the time he said we can talk about it right after *insert next opportunity where we both aren't busy* He asks how I feel about it or he tells me if he's worrying about that problem. Or apologizes if he thinks he did something wrong. It's a good thing as in not too pushy, because I avoid conflict where he wants to fix it. He said he wants the relationship to last so we shouldn't ignore anything.

-His way to solve Non relationship problems...
I'm not too sure cause once again I'm biased, And he doesn't complain a lot about his problems, well he doesn't tell me about it too much. I think he just talks through them mostly, tries to word his way out of awkward situations. I have to think about observing him in that aspect more I guess..

Thanks again, sorry I type so much ahah!:happy:

Now I'm more certain about ESTP. The "I think sally hates me now" thing could be unhealthy tertiary Fe rearing it's ugly head up. But that's kind of weak because that could also be auxiliary Fi working in a weird way. Also, Se is still extremely obvious, especially since you mentioned his sportiness.

When I say non-relationship problems I mean all relationships, not just your romantic one with him. Try to think of how he goes about solving a problem or thinking of an idea that doesn't involve people or social situations.

I'm really Not sure about auxiliary Ti. I could make a really good case for Fi. :/

 

[Sedem]

How would you say other people view him?
And how does he handle school?

 

[Dancingintruth]

How would you say other people view him?
And how does he handle school?

@Zadriela

people view him as either funny or a little too funny and get annoyed by his goofyness with peers sometimes. But all in all people just view him as a normal guy or as a life of the party type.
He handles school.... He doesn't stress out easily over it, makes pretty good grades as I said he's pretty social so people and experiences are usually the highlight of his school days.

 

[Sedem]

@Dancingintruth

Alright then. ESTP is my best guess then, based off the info so far

 

[QueenOfCats]

Too ESTP to function