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Discussion Starter #1
are any of you guys obsessed about your appearance, and in what way?

I'll become obsessed about learning about colours, curly hair, body types, style etc. but when I've learned all there is to know, I lose interest. I actually disregard all the advice I've gotten from my obsession :p. I'm very much a 5, though, so I prefer learning over application. but I prefer learning about me, rather than world conflicts etc. I know, it's horrible. and the vanity of my interests is sort of embarrasing. :rolleyes:
 

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Sometimes, but I've gotten better about not caring over the years. Then again I'm a guy. It must suck to be a girl
 

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are any of you guys obsessed about your appearance, and in what way?

I'll become obsessed about learning about colours, curly hair, body types, style etc. but when I've learned all there is to know, I lose interest. I actually disregard all the advice I've gotten from my obsession :p. I'm very much a 5, though, so I prefer learning over application. but I prefer learning about me, rather than world conflicts etc. I know, it's horrible. and the vanity of my interests is sort of embarrasing. :rolleyes:
I am also obsessed with my looks. I am also obsessed with others' looks. I have a hard time seein beyond looks and I tend to idealise and read things into people based on their looks. I have recently realised that I am very vain...
 

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I wouldn't say obsessed, but my fitness is pretty important to me. I've talked about this with other married couples and there's a tendency to assume when you're single that once you're in a long-term relationship, you can "let yourself go." That's untrue. Your appearance was one of the reasons why they fell for you.

If you gain 50 lbs during the course of your relationship, your partner isn't required to find you physically attractive anymore just because they love you. That goes the same if you end up losing 50lbs from the beginning of the relationship. Losing weight isn't any better if that's what it was about your appearance your Significant Other was originally attracted to. Also, you might not change in any way, but it's also not a given that your SO will continue to find you attractive just because they love you.

Since you can be attracted to someone without loving them, I think it's reasonable to say that just because you love someone doesn't mean you are, were or will continue to be, physically attracted to them.
 

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I can also be a little obsessive about my appearance...well, I wouldn't say obsessive, I have a very limited wardrobe but I kind of have a way of seeing what I wear as a form of art, it stems from my seeing my wardrobe as a way of defining myself..almost like a way of showing what's inside by my outside. Sad thing is I can get a big head if I think I'm dressed especially fabulous, which is really kinda sad really >.<
 
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I certainly take time to appreciate my looks. I have to make the effort because when I don't I slip into thinking I'm not all that great. It's not so much that I'm obsessed, cause I really don't care how I look - it's just important for me to accept what I've got. If that makes any sense.
 
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Discussion Starter #10
I certainly take time to appreciate my looks. I have to make the effort because when I don't I slip into thinking I'm not all that great. It's not so much that I'm obsessed, cause I really don't care how I look - it's just important for me to accept what I've got. If that makes any sense.
it is sort of the same thing here. there is something fascinating about how one can selfsabotage by going against what you have, instead of working with it. I don't see myself as pretty, despite comments to the contrary, but I see how I can make myself look worse than I need to unconsciously. and I believe in making the best of what I have.
 

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I was vain in my teens, couldn't go out without looking good enough for myself. I think I just grew out of it. I do like dressing well, but I don't make any hassle about of it. It does boost confidence though, when you look in a mirror and like your reflection before getting out.
 

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I certainly am. I always try to keep my beard short and trimmed, so that my lips are exposed (if I'm going to kiss someone), and I comb/brush my hair daily. It's pretty long now, and I sort of look like Jesus with glasses (see my profile picture). I like it this way.
 

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I'm pretty much the stereotypical 4w3 when it comes to vanity.
I experience the most stress trying to 'perfect' my appearance and in thinking of ways to improve it to even better convey what I wish to convey to the world.
(Not including these past 2 days --my SLUMPP urgh--) I make a serious effort to hit the gym at least 6 days out of 7 every week, and I'll spend around 2-3 hours there, sometimes 4 when I'm really in the mood to push myself. (And I should really stop 'pushing myself' too often because that is exactly how I got myself into my most recent burnout.)

30 minutes to an hour doing weight training
70 minutes to 2+ hours doing hard cardio
+ the remaining time goes to me unwinding in the jacuzzi/dry sauna/steam room.

And yeah... then there's the diet. In body sculpting/weight loss/etc. a person's diet can either promote or hinder progress. For a few months I've been experimenting with this vegan diet (with the exception of one cheat day per week), and honestly I pulled it off wonderfully for a while. Didn't even crave all the meats and chocolates and whatever else has animal or animal byproducts. But yeah, these past 2 days especially with my emotional burnout I kinda binged a bit in fury. Oh well, gotta bounce back from that.

So...yeah... I'm kinda intense about my... vanity. I think I place a lot of importance on what my image can help me portray to the outside world.

Going even deeper, I probably rely on my appearance to communicate to people how I want to be seen as. Fancy, luxurious, them Juicy couture purses and brand clothes, etc. But I seldom let most people get anywhere further past my practiced laughs and smiles, since I am rather... tender on the inside. Frail. Ya know, INFP. LOL.

But that's a totally different, 4w3 matter.

So, yup !
 

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Looking "good" is good-there's no evil or necessary arrogance/excessive vanity about it. Look just the way you envision yourself to be. I also agree with Mr. @infpblog about the omportance of always caring about yourself, even after marriage. I feel I would be betraying my partner if I just looked "sloppy" after marrying. Due to this, I have promised myself to always take good care of my image and physical health, for I am only worth it, and so is everybody else. :)
 

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I'm pretty much the stereotypical 4w3 when it comes to vanity.
I experience the most stress trying to 'perfect' my appearance and in thinking of ways to improve it to even better convey what I wish to convey to the world.
(Not including these past 2 days --my SLUMPP urgh--) I make a serious effort to hit the gym at least 6 days out of 7 every week, and I'll spend around 2-3 hours there, sometimes 4 when I'm really in the mood to push myself. (And I should really stop 'pushing myself' too often because that is exactly how I got myself into my most recent burnout.)

30 minutes to an hour doing weight training
70 minutes to 2+ hours doing hard cardio
+ the remaining time goes to me unwinding in the jacuzzi/dry sauna/steam room.

And yeah... then there's the diet. In body sculpting/weight loss/etc. a person's diet can either promote or hinder progress. For a few months I've been experimenting with this vegan diet (with the exception of one cheat day per week), and honestly I pulled it off wonderfully for a while. Didn't even crave all the meats and chocolates and whatever else has animal or animal byproducts. But yeah, these past 2 days especially with my emotional burnout I kinda binged a bit in fury. Oh well, gotta bounce back from that.

So...yeah... I'm kinda intense about my... vanity. I think I place a lot of importance on what my image can help me portray to the outside world.

Going even deeper, I probably rely on my appearance to communicate to people how I want to be seen as. Fancy, luxurious, them Juicy couture purses and brand clothes, etc. But I seldom let most people get anywhere further past my practiced laughs and smiles, since I am rather... tender on the inside. Frail. Ya know, INFP. LOL.

But that's a totally different, 4w3 matter.

So, yup !
Old reply (my apologies, Ms. @goldentryst ), but I don't see anything really vain about what you are doing, besides just being extremely careful (perhaps a bit too much?!) about your image and health? I am "4w5" and am also extremely image-conscious, but I do see it as a healthy trait, rather than just a competitive, egocentric trait. Indeed, you even mention that you just want to express yourself through your image, which I feel is not only valid, but commendable (INFP that I am, of course. :p)

But I wanted to reply to this a few days ago when I first read it, because I saw that you spend HOURS on the gym... which is fine! You probably know what you are doing, and the why. But don't you think that you might be overworking yourself quite a bit there? o_O You don't strike me as the kind of person that will need to work that hard to "keep in shape" (of course, keeping ourselves fit is a huge drive, so I understand-I also remember working out "too much" once when I was sad and stressed as well-not that I am saying that you must be stressed to workout this hard, to be sure.) Do you really need to spend so many hours on the gym, or is it just a healthy life ritual you've gotten yourself used to?

Just saying the above because for most people, one hour would suffice, and even 45 minutes for some others, depending on the goal at hand (not including sauna, etc., of course), so I am thinking that you may be overworking yourself? In any case, I am wishing you the best-caring for your image is not wrong AT ALL (I don't think it's unhealthy, or necessarily vain myself), but stressing too much about not looking "perfect enough" might become problematic if it's unbalanced and/or based on our fears rather than on reality. I actually understand, because I have a hard time going out of home if I do not look "just right", whatever that means TO ME. I cannot look "normal"/"average"/etc. and feel good about it. :p Even casual styles must look "like me", and those must look "good" on my own terms (I may not look "good" to a few people because I make my style my own, and avoid just fitting in with what's easy and supposed to look "normally" good.) I hope you are feeling better after your recent burnt out, and that all your workouts and diets keep going well, while you keep kiving a healthy and happy lifestyle, as we all should. :)

(A two days' "slump" is fine-no worries there either.)
 

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No, not too much into my appearance or other's appearances. I took the SLOAN ( big 5 ) in 2009 here at PerC. I came up as RCUEX. I'll post the results to show many parts of results have to do with *appearance* & I don't give much thought to appearances. What is inside is important, to me. I haven't worn make-up for years.

http://personalitycafe.com/whats-my-personality-type/2820-sloan-personality-typing.html

Some of this SLOAN stuff is bang on! Some bang off tho. I might reTest just to see if there are any changes.

Global 5: sloan RCUEN; sloan+ |R|cuEx; primary Reserved; R(76%)C(66%)U(60%)E(68%)X(50%)

Updated 2012: R(82%)C(78%)U(72%)E(66%)I(54%)

Reserved
outsider, does not fit in most places, does not mind going days without speaking to people, does not like night life and crowds, not self expressive, spends more time in solitary activity than group activity, does not compete for the spotlight, fears getting involved with others, not seductive, dresses to avoid standing out, not impulsive, loner, female introverts tend not to like wearing makeup, does not enjoy leadership, not very sexual, more likely to be nerdy, prefers loose fitting clothing, inhibited, suspicious, tattoo averse, unmotivated, can't do anything when they don't fee good, has trouble speaking when emotional, dislikes compliments, desires security and support, does not like accepting help, more visual than verbal, does not want to be famous, likes science fiction, prefers to stick with things they know, not traditional


RCUEN
not easily hurt, does not need things to add up perfectly, keeps emotions under control, spends more time in solitary activities than group activities, when ending an association - tends to stop all communication without explanation, does not readily admit mistakes, underachiever, not known for generosity, level emotions, does not care what people think, does not fit in, more logical than abstract, does not value tradition, uninterested in leadership, not impressionable, not prone to envy, values money over acceptance, not open about feelings, unproductive, values solitude, not very happy, pessimistic, plain appearance, inflexible, won't do much to avoid rejection, not afraid of doing the wrong thing, underachiever, does not accept people as they are, unable to stand up for self, slow to forgive, not that interested in others, does not care about image, not prone to giving compliments, rarely prepared, quiet around strangers, does not like touchy feely people, avoids responsibilities, avoids difficult reading material, rarely reinvents self, does not like to lead, not prone to worrying
 

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Yes I am rather vain, I'm always wondering if I look good, how I could look better etc. I suppose maybe its me being a teenager? I assume so, I was never always this vain. I'm especially obsessed with my hair, even though ironically I never really do anything to it. However I always stroke it, look in the mirror briefly and stroke it on one side lol.
 

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No, not too much into my appearance or other's appearances. I took the SLOAN ( big 5 ) in 2009 here at PerC. I came up as RCUEX. I'll post the results to show many parts of results have to do with *appearance* & I don't give much thought to appearances. What is inside is important, to me. I haven't worn make-up for years.

http://personalitycafe.com/whats-my-personality-type/2820-sloan-personality-typing.html

Some of this SLOAN stuff is bang on! Some bang off tho. I might reTest just to see if there are any changes.

Global 5: sloan RCUEN; sloan+ |R|cuEx; primary Reserved; R(76%)C(66%)U(60%)E(68%)X(50%)

Updated 2012: R(82%)C(78%)U(72%)E(66%)I(54%)

Reserved
outsider, does not fit in most places, does not mind going days without speaking to people, does not like night life and crowds, not self expressive, spends more time in solitary activity than group activity, does not compete for the spotlight, fears getting involved with others, not seductive, dresses to avoid standing out, not impulsive, loner, female introverts tend not to like wearing makeup, does not enjoy leadership, not very sexual, more likely to be nerdy, prefers loose fitting clothing, inhibited, suspicious, tattoo averse, unmotivated, can't do anything when they don't fee good, has trouble speaking when emotional, dislikes compliments, desires security and support, does not like accepting help, more visual than verbal, does not want to be famous, likes science fiction, prefers to stick with things they know, not traditional


RCUEN
not easily hurt, does not need things to add up perfectly, keeps emotions under control, spends more time in solitary activities than group activities, when ending an association - tends to stop all communication without explanation, does not readily admit mistakes, underachiever, not known for generosity, level emotions, does not care what people think, does not fit in, more logical than abstract, does not value tradition, uninterested in leadership, not impressionable, not prone to envy, values money over acceptance, not open about feelings, unproductive, values solitude, not very happy, pessimistic, plain appearance, inflexible, won't do much to avoid rejection, not afraid of doing the wrong thing, underachiever, does not accept people as they are, unable to stand up for self, slow to forgive, not that interested in others, does not care about image, not prone to giving compliments, rarely prepared, quiet around strangers, does not like touchy feely people, avoids responsibilities, avoids difficult reading material, rarely reinvents self, does not like to lead, not prone to worrying
I just took that out of curiosity - I scored:

RCUAI

avoidant, often late, patient, rarely prepared, non-aggressive, slow to judge others, withdrawn, unconcerned with image, relaxed, avoids crowds, easy going, not demanding, low maintenance, unambitious, not domineering, private, thinks before acting, concerned with the feelings of others, not wild and crazy, not controlling, does not like to show anger, hard to offend, dislikes the spotlight, uninterested in leading, not competitive, overly nice, not physically affectionate with most people, not bothered by disorder, level emotions, does not second guess self, agnostic/atheistic tendencies, not picky about food, not relationship obsessed, unproductive, unimposing, plain in appearance, disorganized, loner, lower energy level, very curious, uninterested in prestige/fame, not superficial, likes difficult reading material, does not get worked up about most things, fearless, flexible, trusting, does not stick to plans, easily distracted, interested in science, unconcerned that people have trouble reading them, a good loser, modest, not swayed by emotions

However, I am not plain in appearance, and avoid looking "plain" at all costs. I am concerned with image (my own, not that much that of others), but like you, I care for what's deep down in the individual (I don't find any conflict between having a "good" image as long as it matches who you are, and is not "fake"-to me, wearing makeup doesn't qualify as necessarily fake, but not to you, and this is OK!)

I would be fake if I would be "normal", because even though everybody is different, I am not really at peace at wearing "I am normal" logos on my wardrobe (I.E. looking "plain.") I must "shine", even if such glow is not aasthetically pleasing to many in society. I like to look like myself, but that is not plain, because I do not consider myself plain inside, but rather complex and hard to pinpoint/understand. Thus my image often is a mirror of these qualities, and my continuous personal growth and values. It's hard to understand unless you are me, and I am sure many would consider myself vain, even though in my heart, I am nothing of the sort, as much as I love to look "great" (as far as I define the term); not "normal" or "plain."

Note that I scored Global 5: sloan RCUAI; sloan+ rCu|A|i; primary Accommodating; R(66%)C(68%)U(66%)A(80%)I(56%); this is why I believe I confuse all enneagram test results (and why it hasn't me convinced so much)-I am VERY accomodating (I used to be even more in the past, to my own detriment, but those days are gone, as I deserve to love myself as much as I do others), but I am also very self-oriented, caring for my image as a medium of self-expression, which not even the "Big 5" test is giving me credit for. :p The Enneagram usually places me 2 or 4. I think I am 4w5 according to their descriptions (the tests have yet to convince me), but I need to revisit them again. (Another piece of the puzzle is that I used not to care that much for my image until a few years ago, although I never really enjoyed looking "sloppy".)

Perhaps no personality test is right on its own yet, many of them having elements of the "final truth"-humans are too complex to easily and accurately measure who they really are.

I am sorry if the above seems like if I was trying to counter you in anyway-what I was really saying is that even though I am supposed to look "plain" according to another personality test, I still care a lot about my own image, although I still do not consider it to be unhealthy vanity, or inherent shallowness.
 

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@IcarusDreams.....

I am sorry if the above seems like if I was trying to counter you in anyway-what I was really saying is that even though I am supposed to look "plain" according to another personality test, I still care a lot about my own image, although I still do not consider it to be unhealthy vanity, or inherent shallowness.
Oh no, don't worry at all about the *countering* thing. Gives me a chance to say that YES, you do deserve a chance to shine. Just keep doing what you are doing, it's inspiring to many.

Now, about this test- see on my results it says female introverts don't usually wear make-up? I could relate to that and also wears loose fitting clothes. But a lot of the other stuff about pessimism, I could not relate to. Finally, a lot of people who test what I tested come out as INTP or ISTP. I'm soooo not a T.

Now my apology - sorry to talk so much about me (kinda ironic in a thread about VANITY)...lol, but you are soooooo right, humans ARE complex.
 

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I'm pretty obsessed with my looks, whenever I leave the house I want to look amazing because I never know who I'll run into. Even if I'm going to the store, I might as well make some jaws drop. :cool:
 
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