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I've been making youtube videos to try to improve my verbal communication skills and articulation. I thought this could be a two birds with one stone thing. I hadn't done anything with the novel I was working on for almost a year so I figure this way, I can practice my verbal communication and get another look at my novel and perhaps get inspired to continue with the novel in the process. I would also appreciate any suggestions from fellow INFP writers.
 

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I enjoy it so far:proud:, your character has a voice (what I mean is that he's not flat or anything). Are you going to continue posting, or will you give us a summary of the rest?

My only bit of advice (and I'm by no means any sort of expert) is that old cliche 'show, don't tell'. I'm beyond a hypocrite for even mentioning it as it's a big problem in my own writing, but there it is. I just think it might sound stronger in places if instead of saying how your character finds waitresses attractive, for example, if you described the waitress herself and if you needed to specify that he was particularly fond of waitresses, you could throw in a little character quirk at the end. Something maybe like: She met my eyes with a lofty smile; I looked away, and blushed. I liked waitresses. (for a shy, more awkward character) Or: My waitress slid the warm plates onto our table, and I met her glance. She gave me a cool little smile and I mirrored it. "Hello, what's your name?" I said, trying to breed some warmth. "Lacy," she said with a curt nod, but her eyes looked pleased. My heart jumped a little. I liked waitresses. (for a confident character)

But I have no idea what I'm talking about :tongue:. Like I said: definitely not an expert talking here.

And you should finish it! Regardless of whether you're burnt out with it in the end, you can say that you've written a book!
 

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I enjoy it so far:proud:, your character has a voice (what I mean is that he's not flat or anything). Are you going to continue posting, or will you give us a summary of the rest?

My only bit of advice (and I'm by no means any sort of expert) is that old cliche 'show, don't tell'. I'm beyond a hypocrite for even mentioning it as it's a big problem in my own writing, but there it is. I just think it might sound stronger in places if instead of saying how your character finds waitresses attractive, for example, if you described the waitress herself and if you needed to specify that he was particularly fond of waitresses, you could throw in a little character quirk at the end. Something maybe like: She met my eyes with a lofty smile; I looked away, and blushed. I liked waitresses. (for a shy, more awkward character) Or: My waitress slid the warm plates onto our table, and I met her glance. She gave me a cool little smile and I mirrored it. "Hello, what's your name?" I said, trying to breed some warmth. "Lacy," she said with a curt nod, but her eyes looked pleased. My heart jumped a little. I liked waitresses. (for a confident character)

But I have no idea what I'm talking about :tongue:. Like I said: definitely not an expert talking here.

And you should finish it! Regardless of whether you're burnt out with it in the end, you can say that you've written a book!
I'm going to continue posting. Thank you for your input!
She met my eyes with a lofty smile; I looked away, and blushed. I liked waitresses. (for a shy, more awkward character) Or: My waitress slid the warm plates onto our table, and I met her glance. She gave me a cool little smile and I mirrored it. "Hello, what's your name?" I said, trying to breed some warmth. "Lacy," she said with a curt nod, but her eyes looked pleased. My heart jumped a little. I liked waitresses. (for a confident character)
I would have never have thought to do that on my own. I like it! I like words like "lofty" and "curt" and phrases like "cool little smile" "breed some warmth" "my heart jumped a little", that's just never a part of my usual vocabulary. You have a gift!
 

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Great idea! I like your style, I found what you said until now interesting and easy to follow, so I'm curious to learn something more about the characters! I loved the second part ^^
And I learned many new words. :3

Edit: Oh, you just uploaded the third part... XD I'll watch the video later, thank you for posting it.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
Hold up, I've just looked up other books for sale on kindle and figured it would be best drop my list price. lol. wait 12 hours for the updated lower price........if interested that is.
 
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