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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
We often do not want the attention of other people, say walking in public, but at the same time want to be acknowledged that we are different, we are special, we are the best!

If this premise is true, what kind of things do you do to stand out, but avoid attention?

If false, bye :p
 

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I think the first is something that may happen by strangers, all the time, and who knows for what. Approval or compliments by people we care about for something we feel we deserve, that's different from just 'fame', which I woud find unnerving to anxiety producing. (Besides, we all know that the same people giving the fame are also looking to pull them down from the pedestal.)
 

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Mmm damn, what a mind-blower. I'm in this boat, and I'd say as far as what I do...probably just express myself as truly as possible, when I do.

Not sure about you, but there is certain attention that is appealing to have. It may be if the other person has a high and infectious energy, or maybe if it's just really respectable attention - not just blind praise from sheep.
 

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I don't seek or hide from attention, nor do I lose any sleep over whether or not anyone acknowledges me as a unique snowflake. I guess I'm pretty apathetic in general.
 

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Just shutting up can make you stand out in some arenas while not drawing attention.

Btw, "what kind of things do you do to stand out, but avoid attention?" can be understood as what do you contentiously and actively do with the purpose to stand out, but you mean what you do when you are just you that probably stand out but doesn't draw attention, right? I don't think many INTP do the first: "Today I'm going to wear a red hat to stand out! But I'm going to walk among the back alleys instead of the main road to not draw attention."
 

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I was standing in line at Barnes and Noble the other day. Several people, myself included, were talking on the phone while waiting. Right before my turn at the checkout I said 'Let me call you back, I'm at the head of the line.' and hung up before greeting the cashier. She thanked me effusively for doing this. Apparently the norm is to stay on the line, put your purchase on the counter and ignore the cashier entirely while continuing your phone conversation.

Standing out nowadays is easy, all you have to do is be polite.
 

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It's the other way around for me. As a 4w3, I'm desperate for attention. I don't particularly want to stand out, but I want to be true to myself. Standing out is a side effect.
 

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I want to be admired/worshiped but not sexualized/stalked.
 
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It's odd really. I like being great at something, but I don't like being TOLD I'm great. If someone gives me a compliment I immediately wonder what they want, whereas if someone comes to me for help out of everyone... it makes me happy :)

When I was younger I hated being that way. Getting pleasure being validated by others. It seemed like a weakness. I don't mind now though and just enjoy it.
 

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Standing out doesn't mean more attention.

In the 6th grade, we had a school play where two kids were trees. Just standing there and doing nothing, and it was demanded that they come for 2-3 hours during holidays for practice.. just to stand there. I confronted the teacher about the logic behind this and she demoted me from a semi-main character to a tree. I basically gave her a "fuck you" and didn't show up for a single practice or the main concert.

I stand out all the time without getting or seeking attention.
(Not talking about the literal "attention" on stage in the play)
 

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I work my ass off, I am confident, thoughtful and friendly to others. I don't have time to please people otherwise.
 

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Strive to be the best at literally everything I do. Though I do this because I don't expect or want anything less for myself. But I don't do this to "stand out" per se although that's a side perk.
 

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Oh god this is so true for me. I live in the midwest where, even in summer, it's not socially normative to go barefoot anywhere other than in your backyard. I never really knew this until I started going barefoot everywhere. At best, people thought I was unique, at worst, (traditionalist types) were super angry :angry: at me as if me being barefoot was tantamount to attacking the very nature of who they are...which is weird.

Although I did not start going barefoot with others in mind, I smile on the inside now anytime people acknowledge me for being different. It's weird. But I like standing out.
 

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Strive to be the best at literally everything I do. Though I do this because I don't expect or want anything less for myself. But I don't do this to "stand out" per se although that's a side perk.
Does this translate into a desire to reach total perfection? Like becoming a chess grandmaster or top pianist or whatever? Well, not just a desire, but are you actually actively pursuing those things?
 

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Does this translate into a desire to reach total perfection? Like becoming a chess grandmaster or top pianist or whatever? Well, not just a desire, but are you actually actively pursuing those things?
Not those exact things but in my own interests I want to be the best I can yes and do pursue that goal.
 
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