[TheFamousPencil]

Okay, so here is my story. I am an ENTP. I went on spring break a little over a month ago. I was just having a great time partying and I happened to stumble upon this girl (who I now know to be an INFJ). Okay, so I guess I did something right because later that night we ended up trying to have sex. I was way too drunk to actually have sex but it happened a couple nights later after a fun day of spending time with her. So spring break ends, so sad.

I began texting her and found out she had some guy back home she was sort of hooking up with but she chose to end that. I have talked to her every day at least with a short text message and sometimes a long phone conversation or Skype. She seems really interesting to me. The only problem is she lives 4 hours away from me and I can't just go hang out with her. So now a month has passed and I am scheduled to go see her in a couple weeks.

Here's my deal: she is a music major finishing up her degree and trying to get into grad school. She is extremely busy usually with studying/performing/work. Over the past week we have started to talk less and less.

I may be overanalyzing this, but over the past week or so most communication has been via text messages and I find it very difficult to get a good read on a person through text message. I am kinda starting to feel the "spark" that was initially felt for the first few weeks is disappearing and am wondering how long it takes for an INFJ to get bored of someone. I am willing to try to see how things could work out, or do you think I should just start to put my focus towards other things instead of trying to keep something going that isn't going to work out?

Would an INFJ be straight with me if she didn't think she was feeling the "spark" either, or would she keep talking to me just to keep my feelings from getting hurt? What would you be thinking in this situation? I know other INFJ's and they seem to kinda be off in their own dream land sometimes so it might just be I am overanalyzing it.

 

[Pier 56]

Okay, so here is my story. I am an ENTP. I went on spring break a little over a month ago. I was just having a great time partying and I happened to stumble upon this girl (who I now know to be an INFJ). Okay, so I guess I did something right because later that night we ended up trying to have sex. I was way too drunk to actually have sex but it happened a couple nights later after a fun day of spending time with her. So spring break ends, so sad.

I began texting her and found out she had some guy back home she was sort of hooking up with but she chose to end that. I have talked to her every day at least with a short text message and sometimes a long phone conversation or Skype. She seems really interesting to me. The only problem is she lives 4 hours away from me and I can't just go hang out with her. So now a month has passed and I am scheduled to go see her in a couple weeks.

Here's my deal: she is a music major finishing up her degree and trying to get into grad school. She is extremely busy usually with studying/performing/work. Over the past week we have started to talk less and less.

I may be overanalyzing this, but over the past week or so most communication has been via text messages and I find it very difficult to get a good read on a person through text message. I am kinda starting to feel the "spark" that was initially felt for the first few weeks is disappearing and am wondering how long it takes for an INFJ to get bored of someone. I am willing to try to see how things could work out, or do you think I should just start to put my focus towards other things instead of trying to keep something going that isn't going to work out?

Would an INFJ be straight with me if she didn't think she was feeling the "spark" either, or would she keep talking to me just to keep my feelings from getting hurt? What would you be thinking in this situation? I know other INFJ's and they seem to kinda be off in their own dream land sometimes so it might just be I am overanalyzing it.

She'll probably try to not hurt any feelings...
INFJs don't get "bored" with people. So, if she is, then it may be fading.
There's only one thing you can do...

FAKE YOUR OWN DEATH!!!

But she is probably just really busy.

 

[arishorts]

if she's talking to you in general, that's a good sign.

 

[Stickling]

Much like what Pier 56 said, something tells me she wouldn't want to hurt your feelings either way. I suppose it's something we'd rather avoid having to do in general. It has its positives and its negatives, and the latter mainly comes into play should you decide to ask her up front, I'm afraid.

What you choose to do will depend on how the situation evolves, I guess. I'd just hold off the decision making until you're going to meet her again.

You see, chances are you are over-analysing a little, indeed. You like her and you'd like some clarity on what she feels for you... but a lack of face to face contact means things can get a little 'blurry', especially if you find it hard to 'get a good read on a person' that way. That's normal. A lot of people feel that way. Don't forget, though... a lot of infp's really like written conversation. She's probably well aware of the fact you'd really like to stay in contact, and chances are she is just 'very very busy'.

It seems to me you feel like things are fading because you simply can't really know what she's thinking or what she really means this way... you're not getting that same 'connection' any more, not being able to read her. So... I guess the best advice I could give you is to let her know this form of communication is making things unclear for you.
(Not actually asking her whether she still feels something for you until you see her again is probably the safest option, too... at least, if you'd rather avoid her trying 'not to hurt you' rather than speaking her mind directly. It's a tempting thing to do)