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Hey,
Just wondering if other EnfJ's were told that they were "hyper" when they were growing up?

I was told this every now and then as a kid (no ADHD either), but when I got excited about something, my voice and energy really raised up. And one of the biggest things that bothered me as a kid was "boredom".

I'm kind of going off in a tangent now, but...that "hyperactiveness" has seemed to go away as I got older, but sometimes I wonder if I still carry that sense of big energy deep within me. Most days I feel kind of restless. Then today I got into discussion with my mom about my "future" (one that I always dislike talking about with her), which really left me kind of frustrated. I felt lots of tension in my whole upper body and so when I left the room, without thinking I took a small squishy stress ball. I then found a small empty room with a clear wall in my house and started throwing the ball and catching it as it rebounded towards me. I must have done this for several minutes.

Strange thing was, I felt better...just mindlessly throwing and catching the ball, like it was some game. I kind of felt like a kid again, where my most favorite time of the day was playing. It made me think that maybe I have too much energy still inside me, which fuels my stress and emotions to go to an extreme side. I figure that I need to be more physically active somehow from now on, if I want to be more in control of my emotions and this daily sense of restlessness.

Anyways, I learned today that maybe I'm still like the kid I used to be, with abundant energy and a need for movement, so I should try to fulfill this need to release this energy whenever possible by play/movement and other child-like, fun things.
 

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That realzation is an important one.

I was a very confused child. I was early raised mostly by my mother as my father was always too busy at work. I don't ever remember being over-energetic. I'd say I had a lot of drive and ambition though.

I was also my mom's favourite and still am. Youngest and pretty much the baby ... Also was born with a silver spoon in my mouth so mostly sheltered and a little spoiled.

Actually, I think my elders thought I was more spoiled than I really was. Neither ever tried to connect with me amd their resentment towards me because of my mom's attention runs deep.

So I became reclusive very, very early on. I had trouble making friends till I turned 12. I was always doing something or the other on my own. Or taken along for the ride. I loved my family deeply and let's just say that love wasn't reciprocated the way I wanted it to.

So whatever energy I had was spent studying, playing music ... talking to a friend on the phone ... visiting him from time to time. My emotions have always been dark, but buried .... I used to feel intensely but they would interfere with what I needed to do, so I used to write about my darkness and forget about it. I was suicidal by the time I was 13 and that has carried through till now.

As for energy .... I had my moments. But not too many. I was too easily able to be what: bwas expected to be. Even as a kid I could predict what was expected of me and I did it. And I carried the burden of my darkness with me.

I aslo was very sick most of childhood. And got disabled at a very young age. I tried to fight it all but sometimes the fight gets too hard and I get very close to giving up.
 

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No, I was not hyperactive as a kid. I've always been pretty low energy and I don't let my excitement show to those I don't trust. My energy comes from very specific moments where everything is just right, and then I can be hyper. Otherwise, I'm usually at a low energy level. I've known a lot of people who complained or mentioned that they have pent up energy and need to expell it somehow. This doesn't usually happen to me (except when it comes to sexual energy). I've never identified with feeling truly restless, like I need to get up and move.
 

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YES! Very hyper active. I was up every morning before my parents and hated napping. My mom said she could hardly keep up with me. And I still find myself pretty hyper, especially when I am interacting with people.

Any form of exercise is a fantastic release for any built up tension / raw emotions. I am so glad you found a good remedy to allow yourself to feel your emotions and process them
 

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Fosho. Diagnosed ADHD here. Used to always type ENFP due to the "P" traits that jive with ADHD, but in individual function tests I've scored both, with ENFJ prevailing particularly recently. I do seem to have significant Ne though, so I consider myself somewhat of a hybrid. Still have FAR more Fe than Fi, though, and very little Si, so I'm 99% sure I'm an ENFJ.
 

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I think my experience was more akin to Etherea and Jaws.

I'm a 2w3 (so/sx/sp), so I was a pretty calm/shy child.... also a "goody two-shoes" type of kid too. I was always looking for something to help with, and someone to help. Whether it be my teacher, parents, friends, younger kids at my school etc. I was an approval seeker. My parents were also pretty strict with me as a child, so any misbehavior or emotional outbursts were met with punishment (which even the idea of getting in trouble kept me in line).

Anyway, there's a thread started by iamken about it what we were like as an EFJ child... i'd link to it, but i don't have 15 posts yet. It's worth checking out. Has a good link to "portrait of an EFJ child" that you might find interesting =)
 

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No I wasn't hyperactive. I was more like an INFJ I think. My Extroversion didn't really kick in until about 19-20 years old maybe. It's hard to pinpoint seeing as it was also a time when I was finding my confidence. Maybe I was just a very independent, quiet Enfj child. Who knows?
 

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No I wasn't hyperactive. I was more like an INFJ I think. My Extroversion didn't really kick in until about 19-20 years old maybe. It's hard to pinpoint seeing as it was also a time when I was finding my confidence. Maybe I was just a very independent, quiet Enfj child. Who knows?
Pretty much the same with me, except my extroversion started kicking in a little earlier than that. I was always observant, though, looking outward, and focusing on others. Even as a baby my mom said I'd be playing with toys, and just look around and see what everybody was up to.

However, there were times as a kid.... you get me with the right friend, and if the mood strikes... we'd be talking a million miles an hour, and laughing our asses off like madmen. It's still the case today. I'm pretty quiet, calm, and social. You get me with the right friend and I can get pretty energetic.
 
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