What do ENFJs think about INFPs? (positive and negative)

I'll be a little more methodical than usual with this, but I'll start off with descriptions I like that are taken from an INFP article on your sub-forum:

-Their abstractions act as a source of inspiration for new ideas. Artistic and imaginative, they seek novel, meaningful experiences that evoke their emotions. They engage in activities that feel right, in which they can obtain a moment of Zen.
That sounds simply amazing, nobody else I know understands how those moments feel, and can enjoy them with me as much as my ENFJ friend can.

-they value uniqueness and self-expression. Many INFPs create their own career path.
We value individualism, but not narcissism. In regards to what INFPs occupy their time with, they know their shit. It's extremely attractive. Oh, and a big one... YOU'RE OPINIONATED. You have a backbone, congratulations, you've instantly earned the respect of an ENFJ.

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Now, those are my two favourite traits in INFPs. You girls aren't restless, like a yippy chihuahua who needs to be attended to for every waking hour of the day (I've had bad experiences). You're autonomous and comfortable with it, that's sexy.

You have opinions, you don't like certain people. One, that tells me that you're observant of the world, and you have created your own moral guideline for yourself, we value self-discipline. Two, we hope that that self-discipline will ensure that you are a wonderful person in a relationship context. Also, you can't love everybody in the world. You give tremendous support to those around you, whether they notice or not, but you still do it, and we would notice.

From what I've read from frequenting the INFP forum, you guys usually have issues in social situations, and in dealing/responding to people. That helps us break the ice with you, we are so in tune with how other people are feeling, we accommodate your insecurities and let you know that we recognize you as a human being, and that you can be comfortable shedding the guise that you normally take out in public. Ssh, don't deny it. :crazy:

There are also recurring words like loyalty, and caring, etc. I like to think of you guys as marshmellows. I wish I was a marshmellow, you could only wish you could bring as much joy as a person feels eating a fucking marshmellow.

And you're all super cute. I wouldn't say I have a problem with that.

All the INFP's I've ever met were unhealthy victims. Everything was some excuse to have a victim mentality and this does not mesh well at all with my Type 8 tendencies.

Edit: The positives, though... I feel like they understand me in a way most others don't. And it happens without even trying. It's nice.

My husband is ENFJ. He says that he appreciates my intelligence, that I'm "different" from other people (not interested in the surface level and enjoy deep conversations), my having strong convictions, creativity, that I understand him and took the time to truly know him/let him be himself (not just accepting what he showed to the world), kindness toward others, honesty and loyalty.

Haha, niffer's avatar is the epitome of ENFJ. I want to cuddle it...

My best friend is an INFP!
I am 19 now and we have been friends since middle school.
The only problem I ever had with her is that I tend to be clingy/domineering and I try really hard to bring out the best in people. I was constantly cheering her on and trying to get her to sign up for activities in school with me that I knew she would like. She just tended to withdraw. This is mostly connected to the fact that we weren't as mature or our developed selves.
I also dated an INFP, who was depressed, so idk how that factored into it. His Fe wasn't very developed and tended to withdraw from emotion.


Despite the fact that I may be too extraverted and tend to smother with love, I love INFPs and are always drawn to them, and I like how they understand me. Gotta love that Fe and Ni

I love INFPs, at least if my girlfriend is any indicator. She's an INFP and when she's happy, she's a lot of fun. She's also super creative (I think that might be an INFP trait?). She's also a great listener, and she always knows what to say to cheer me up. She usually doesn't express too much emotion (or maybe I just express way too much emotion) but she's still always good at understanding my emotions. She's also very laid-back, and I love that, for some reason. There aren't really many negatives, any of the negatives are really my fault, but that isn't because of my being an ENFJ, it's more because I have depression and some serious cognitive distortions, like how I always worry she's mad at me. She's great at understanding and dealing with that though.

I'm not sure if those are all INFP traits, but I while I was writing this I was reading about INFP traits and they seem like they are. So I love INFPs roud:

I have an INFP female housemate who is just fantastic.

However, I've never had much luck in relationships with INFP males.

The positive: They were very unique, deep, emotional, sensitive, artistic and I wasn't ashamed to have deep emotional "idealist" moments around them. They were also fun and adventurous.

The negative: They were either very self-absorbed, couldn't make up their minds, or prone to idealization of events so much that it made me want to run for the hills. Even when I would talk about my emotions it wasn't the deep kind of emotional response they seemed to crave. With one of them this desire to always have intense emotional/meaningful moments took away from our time together, I felt. It just made me feel really less than, even if it wasn't what the INFP intended. They were also sort of flaky.

Not necessarily. A lot goes into a relationship. Some INFP's are great for some ENFJ's. Some ENFJ's might need a different type. Other ENFJ's might need an INFP, but that doesn't mean that every INFP is right for them. I will PM you because I have some thoughts on the topic that I don't want to post.

Khendjer said:

My husband is ENFJ. He says that he appreciates my intelligence, that I'm "different" from other people (not interested in the surface level and enjoy deep conversations), my having strong convictions, creativity, that I understand him and took the time to truly know him/let him be himself (not just accepting what he showed to the world), kindness toward others, honesty and loyalty.

Haha, niffer's avatar is the epitome of ENFJ. I want to cuddle it...

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People commonly say this about infp's, but infp's are the last people to tell you about their problems. and even what sounds like victim-talk might simply be a way of releasing toxic emotions

I think infp are wonderful human beings. The right amount of self-loathing and humor. The right amount of care and ability to disconnect. They have that special kind of intelligence that is unique and intriguing. They are good at expressing themself and their ideas. They have the self control to only show you what they want to and that makes it feel special when you are the person they want to show it to. I have an infp friend and some people think her kids are kind of unruly but they are actually very sweet energetic kids.. and I have seen her hold them in her arms and she loves them so much. You can tell she is a good mom. Infp love MOMENTS...they are moment people. They want to feel something and indulge in some way, and escape into their own world. They get bored easy and I can relate. They have hilarious insights. I do love them very much.

The cons are they have trouble maintaining relationships and jobs and things like that. They can get overwhelmed by others needs and take criticism personally and may feel frozen or go in a circle. So they are not exactly a beacon of stability lol. They tend to vibrate outside of reality sometimes lol (like intp) and this can be a little hard to deal with at least for myself.