[Nightwind]

I watched a move tonight that made me wonder. Wonder about the opinion of love and what we all think. My dad said to me quite recently that he feels that every person has holes and we find out partners in life when we meet the person who matches up with us to fill those holes, maybe they only fill most of them, it's not always perfect, but you fit together. The conversation showed me that he believes with his whole heart my mother was his only match and he will not ever remarry which I anticipated.

But what about all of you? One destined parter? Many possible partners for every person? Is love an idealism that we all want to believe in? Can it happen in an instant? Can you just know?

I for one believe in the validity and existence of love. I have seen it in my family. I have been a part of real, loving, caring, team work family where the marriages of the grandparents long ago reached their 50th anniversary and my parents were on their way to 33. Though I'll admit being 26 and having decided on someone once and having that taken away and being so unhappy in my current situation I wonder. How do we keep the faith, if we believe?

 

[Raichan]

I think there can be many forms of the romantic love for you to go through in life, but there's ultimately the one real love you always feel connected to and that can surpass circumstances, time and even space.

*I really hope I will never stop believing in that. I'm only human, I'm sure that I'm not safe from disappointments*

 

[xezene]

Sometimes the destiny you believe in, is the destiny you get.... :wink:

 

[rowingineden]

I think there are just like, whole "classes" of people that each person can attract within their lifetime, and there are plenty of people within each of these classes, so there's always a few nearby, it's just a matter of figuring out how to contact them and then seal the deal. As far as soulmates, I think we all have several potential soulmates in the world, but unfortunately those aren't really as common, so we usually don't get too many of those in one lifetime.

But see, I'm not naturally a monogamous creature, so I don't think of things in the common uh, "one true love" type ways.

 

[SenhorFrio]

i think there are many people out there who are compatible for each other, you'll never find someone perfect maybe you'll find osmeone better but i say just be happy with what you got.
Love is only real if you believe in it-it's in our heads, but really it's an exellent thing why not believe in it, all those love-cynical people-i truly feel sorry for them

 

[faeriegal713]

I will actually have to borrow the words of my INFJ friend, "We all have a soul mate, but that does not mean he or she is meant to be the love of our lives romantically. I have many soul mates, Paul, you, (referring to me) Karon, and who knows who else that I haven't met yet. We're connected, there's something more than just friendship, and I believe that our souls and paths have crossed before and will cross again."

Essentially, we all have soul mates, but they aren't necessarily going to be romantic in the way most people think of a soul mate. Her words rang true to me then and still ring true today.

It is a not so secret fear of mine that I will not find a romantically compatible soul mate. If I do, well, I will be amongst the most blessed in the world. If I don't.... then at least I'm prepared.

 

[Pachacutie]

I think it all boils down to companionship. It's human nature to want that. I think because life can be so hard, it's easier for people to get through it with the same person. Someone who has seen it all with you and knows how you feel. And this person should be someone you're compatible with and someone that you love.

I don't know about the whole "one soulmate" thing. I think that must not be the case because plenty of people find their perfect person close in proximity to them. If that were the case, that only one person could be perfect for you... I'd say the odds would be pretty off that this person would be anywhere close to you. Or maybe that's all fate. I'm not sure. I'm never sure.

But I do think soulmates exist. I just don't know if there is only one possibility for each person.

 

[Azure Bass]

I hit the wrong button..A is my response, not D. Probably the only time Red would ever rise above blue, in my opinion. Hope is hope, after all.

Edit: I haven't thought about romance much, or at all, past my understanding of it in relevance to hate, so my belief may change. I haven't walked the waters of the blue fire called Passion.

 

[Nomenclature]

There is no such thing as "one true love" or one soul mate out there-- there are only different amounts and facets on which two people can connect and function as a unit for reaching toward life goals and/or raising children.

Yes, it's something we all want to believe in because evolution hard wires humans to act on bonding with mates and I personally think that "love" is another label for this bonding.

No, this bond and wanting to spend your life with the person cannot happen in an instant-- but you could "just know" from picking up on subconscious cues that make up the person's apparent "aura" as well as how they relate to your prior knowledge.

"Love" in the biological aspect is an irrational process for a rational cause. In this irrationality, we're obviously going to experience it from the human point of view.

And this is why I doubt my Fness sometimes. :crazy:

 

[rowingineden]

i think there are many people out there who are compatible for each other, you'll never find someone perfect maybe you'll find osmeone better but i say just be happy with what you got.
Love is only real if you believe in it-it's in our heads, but really it's an exellent thing why not believe in it, all those love-cynical people-i truly feel sorry for them

Truthfully, anyone I'm with is perfect for me in as long as I'm with them.

 

[SenhorFrio]

Truthfully, anyone I'm with is perfect for me in as long as I'm with them.

you know now that you mention it i'd have to agree

 

[Calvaire]

I'm not sure what I believe most of the time But I do believe in connections.
If I feel something with someone then I feel it and things go on from there.
I do believe in Fate. It will sort things out for me.
Regardless really of gender or of things I might of been attracted to
I think there is some fate that will guide me to someone who is perfectly set for me.
Do I believe there is just ONE person like that?

No because we'll all most likely fall in love more than once and each and every time were going to
think that person is the perfect one for us and maybe they were maybe for that time fate set us up with perfection
then it allowed us to grow,move on and meet other people who are perfect for us and then maybe if
were lucky one day it will allow us to settle.

 

[Azure Bass]

There is no such thing as "one true love" or one soul mate out there-- there are only different amounts and facets on which two people can connect and function as a unit for reaching toward life goals and/or raising children.

Yes, it's something we all want to believe in because evolution hard wires humans to act on bonding with mates and I personally think that "love" is another label for this bonding.

No, this bond and wanting to spend your life with the person cannot happen in an instant-- but you could "just know" from picking up on subconscious cues that make up the person's apparent "aura" as well as how they relate to your prior knowledge.

"Love" in the biological aspect is an irrational process for a rational cause. In this irrationality, we're obviously going to experience it from the human point of view.

And this is why I doubt my Fness sometimes. :crazy:

You're absolutely right. I still don't know, but you have alerted me to the fact that I have been influenced by the media to think something like that. I guess that's how it's been affecting me in large. Thank you for the eye opener, Scintilla; I really do appreciate it. You have saved me from emotional turmoil I do believe. :happy:

 

[AllorNuthin]

Having changed schools many times, always on the lookout for my next infatuation, I have learned to pay attention to the quiet ones. The 'sexy' girls who catch my attention at first usually end up on the you don't exist to me list once I get to know them. Sexy just doesn't last. Beautiful, however, inevitably grows into gorgeous, and drives my insticts to drop everything but white hot desire to protect and romance! I always look for a cute face, a kind soul peering through optimistic eyes, and hopefully a broken heart waiting to be caressed. I don't believe in love at first sight, but I know it can happen faster than you want it to. I don't believe in one soulmate, but I only fall in love with one at a time. It's really about personality. I end up hopelessly attracted to any body that houses a good heart, often to my suprise. I imagine its the sexy girl I like, but after a few months it's the cute, quiet girl in the corner with the ponytail who makes me crazy.

 

[Roze]

The dark side of me wants to say there's no such thing as love, but I do know it exists.

Personally I feel like there's many people who could be destined to be our love, only "many" is only like five people for us, LOL.

 

[refugee]

all i can tell you is that I look forward to the day when i can finally become my true self

 

[Lad]

Props to the 1 other person that voted for there only being 1 person destined for us (you rock! -- izzie?).
I am a true blue romantic to the point of possibly being naive, but I don't care.

I think we can all get married quite a large number of people and still be generally happy throughout our lives. Most of those marriages turn into divorce, or more depressingly, roomies with privileges.

Personally, I think the most important aspect of a relationship is seeking fulfillment. Fulfillment allows you to look at yourself, your partner, and your family together, with pride. It allows you to wake up every morning and sleep peacefully every night. It creates an incredible vibe throughout the house that will resonate through both you and your partner. This is the best type for parenting for children to experience. I could go on and on with this, but I'd be pages long.

Another way to put it is, can you bake the -exact- same pie twice? No. There are too many variables which can influence it, even on the micro level. Therefore, none of us are identical. If none of us are identical then that means it is entirely possible that there is 1 person that is absolutely the best possible match for us because there is no one else exactly like them.

With that in mind, most of us will never find that soulmate and we'll just end up settling, but I still think they're out there.

 

[faeriegal713]

Props to the 1 other person that voted for there only being 1 person destined for us (you rock!).
I am a true blue romantic to the point of possibly being naive, but I don't care.

I think we can all get married quite a large number of people and still be generally happy throughout our lives. Most of those marriages turn into divorce, or more depressingly, roomies with privileges.

Personally, I think the most important aspect of a relationship is seeking fulfillment. Fulfillment allows you to look at yourself, your partner, and your family together, with pride. It allows you to wake up every morning and sleep peacefully every night. It creates an incredible vibe throughout the house that will resonate through both you and your partner. This is the best type for parenting for children to experience. I could go on and on with this, but I'd be pages long.

Another way to put it is, can you bake the -exact- same pie twice? No. There are too many variables which can influence it, even on the micro level. Therefore, none of us are identical. If none of us are identical then that means it is entirely possible that there is 1 person that is absolutely the best possible match for us because there is no one else exactly like them.

With that in mind, most of us will never find that soulmate and we'll just end up settling, but I still think they're out there.

I know that I had believed that there was one special person for each of us at one point in time, I just knew that I would find my "knight in shining armor" or what have you. I started questioning when I was watching the movie Ever After.

Henry: Do you really think there is only one perfect mate?
Leonardo da Vinci: As a matter of fact, I do.
Henry: Well then how can you be certain to find them? And if you do find them, are they really the one for you or do you only think they are? And what happens if the person you're supposed to be with never appears, or, or she does, but you're too distracted to notice?
Leonardo da Vinci: You learn to pay attention.
Henry: Then let's say God puts two people on Earth and they are lucky enough to find one another. But one of them gets hit by lightning. Well then what? Is that it? Or, perchance, you meet someone new and marry all over again. Is that the lady you're supposed to be with or was it the first? And if so, when the two of them were walking side by side were they both the one for you and you just happened to meet the first one first or, was the second one supposed to be first? And is everything just chance or are some things meant to be?

This set me to questioning and wondering and it led me to believe that Fate is rather fickle and Life is rather complicated and Destiny is easily distracted and they don't always communicate very well. I could have been born in the wrong century, or wrong half of the century compared to my soul mate, and what then? Am I to pine for him? Or what if he just happened to follow Life rather than Fate for a few minutes and rather than running into me at the bookstore, he got into a horrible accident and we never crossed paths. If there truly were one and only one for each of us, wouldn't that mean that we should cross paths? Shouldn't Fate/Life/Destiny give us the CHOICE to decide whether we are going to figure out what in the world it is that we are feeling and why this person is so devastatingly fascinating...

And all that is to cover up my fear of what I bolded - that I already have missed or will miss my soul mate and will settle. Despite being blocked right now, I also know that the idea of settling makes me restless, irritable. I don't know that I deserve to find him, that special and remarkable soul, but I feel that maybe I should be given a chance to know him. Yes it would be devastating to know and lose him, but I could live with that rather than wondering if I will meet him after I have said my vows to another...

I'm noticing a trend related to fear and being unable or unwilling to commit. I have much to think about.

 

[Raichan]

Props to the 1 other person that voted for there only being 1 person destined for us (you rock! -- izzie?).
I am a true blue romantic to the point of possibly being naive, but I don't care.

I think we can all get married quite a large number of people and still be generally happy throughout our lives. Most of those marriages turn into divorce, or more depressingly, roomies with privileges.

Personally, I think the most important aspect of a relationship is seeking fulfillment. Fulfillment allows you to look at yourself, your partner, and your family together, with pride. It allows you to wake up every morning and sleep peacefully every night. It creates an incredible vibe throughout the house that will resonate through both you and your partner. This is the best type for parenting for children to experience. I could go on and on with this, but I'd be pages long.

Another way to put it is, can you bake the -exact- same pie twice? No. There are too many variables which can influence it, even on the micro level. Therefore, none of us are identical. If none of us are identical then that means it is entirely possible that there is 1 person that is absolutely the best possible match for us because there is no one else exactly like them.

With that in mind, most of us will never find that soulmate and we'll just end up settling, but I still think they're out there.

How did you know I believe in ''the One''?

 

[Raichan]

To clarify where I stand.. (Okay at least this is just my view and it's personal, I don't know about the rest of you)..

I do believe in this lifetime, we can love more than one person. It can be many different forms of romantic love. Love is usually a special connection. Are you going to say you never loved the person you once wrote poetry for with your tears while she or he smiled at you romantically and said,''I love you''? Right, of course you loved that person at some point.

However, I also believe in the ultimate one. Out of all your loves, there is always that one person who still gives you butterflies in your stomach even after a long time. There is always that one person to whom you've shown a side of you underneath your facades, layers, expressions which you've never shown a single other person. There is always that one person whom you feel connected to, regardless of time, circumstances, space but ideally, if it's meant to be, you want to be with that person for the rest of your life and feel the person's love everyday. There is always that one person whom you'd still find yourself missing with a deep ache in your heart even if life gave you all the other friends and dreams you ever wanted. Somewhere deep inside you, lies a deep mark from the huge and small gestures of that ultimate one. The ultimate one is the one person who can make you believe in yourself in a few moments when you were convinced the world didn't seem to matter much to you anymore. The ultimate one is just someone who is everything to you, and that even if life, and other people try to redefine that meaning for you, that meaning you share with that person stays inside you for the rest of your life.