Personality Cafe banner

1 - 20 of 33 Posts

·
Banned
Joined
·
1,987 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
This is a scenario that I find is so much different online than in person. In person, you can usually resolve the conflict and advance the conversation. But what about online, when you don't have that person to person contact?

So, a question to the INFPs out there -- when you read a post that is insulting, to either what you believe or to yourself as a person, what do you do? How do you act?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,134 Posts
There was this user, quite obnoxious yet INFP according to himself. First I made fun of the thread he made, later on I tried to understand why he made the thread and analyzed him a bit. After he continued his behaviour I sent him a personal message. Not much later he was banned.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,999 Posts
I usually don't really care much, so I say my piece and and then unsubscribe from the thread and let the other person have the satisfaction of thinking they've "won" somehow. Usually "saying my piece" involves mainly just joking about the person/situation.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Angel1412kaitou

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,347 Posts
Use logic and humor to cripple their argument. This implies that you are educated, but also makes the other person look foolish. They will likely become paranoid about whatever they respond with next and that just leads to more irrational behavior with holes in it. People have a tendency to elevate people to status when they appear educated and feel they may be more -just-. Conversely, if you run off your mouth off with obscenities then you likely won't get community support and if someone jumps in against you then you might be dead in the water.

There are other types of people who just speak through personal experience and beliefs that are next to impossible to prove. It's like arguing with a religious person, you just never do it. I just ignore those posts entirely, they're usually long too.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,999 Posts
I'll have to get back to you. No one has offended me yet on here
Hey, I saw your mom yesterday. I gave her 3 bucks and she gave me head.
 

·
MOTM Dec 2011
Joined
·
8,651 Posts
On the rare occasion I, as a person, have been directly insulted or called a name, then I report it. That's unusual though (maybe happened twice).

If the person disagrees with me, then I tend to defend/further explain my view if I see the criticism as invalid. To me, this is "arguing", but not necessarily hostile. I avoid topics I feel really strongly about (ie. spirituality/religion) because those conversations can feel confrontational & that's emotionally draining. If the discussion takes on a hostile tone, then I back out. I may say a brief reason why I am choosing not to discuss it further and then avoid the thread. If I notice a trend with someone, then I may avoid that person.

You can't expect everyone to agree with you, so you have to determine that when someone criticizes a thought or idea you express that it is not necessarily a personal insult. You can choose to disregard their criticism and write it off as a different opinion. You may ask them to explain their criticism also, as sometimes we assume someone has questioned an idea for a certain reason when it was a very different one. This can lead to understanding different perspectives better, which is very useful. Sometimes, it clears up both people's views as not even being contradictory, but just different takes on similar principles - basically, it's not about right/wrong.

Sometimes, people have made an argument in reply to some statement I've made, and it seemed reasonable to me. It was not an attack on me, but it was asking me to consider another idea, one that may be more sound. Approach is everything to me here; I will respond better to a respectful approach. Even if I don't agree with the person, it does make me more apt to hear them out. I try and take the same approach when responding to posts I don't agree with - express my counter view in a non-offensive manner. I'm not always successful, and neither is everyone else. Sometimes success doesn't mean "winning" (most of the time it does not). It just means you heard each other out without offense being taken.

I know it is VERY hard for me to not take things personally; it can be a weak point of many INFPs. In an effort to defend an idea or feeling, we can seem overly sensitive.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Aero and xezene

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,190 Posts
If it indirectly insults me, I try to make direct contact privately to try to tackle the issue so there are no further problems or bias between the two of us, whoever it may be.

If it's a direct insult? I haven't been on the forums long enough to say.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,999 Posts
  • Like
Reactions: Raichan

·
Banned
Joined
·
1,238 Posts
You guys got to remember us NFs are idealist. Were goning to get alot of insults that people will so call cover up with " constructive criticism" even though at sometimes it wasn't constructive. Remember theres alot of old school, closed minded, hating people that hate idealist and are traditional old school conventional people . we all need to stand up for ourselves! :proud:
 
  • Like
Reactions: Raichan

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,793 Posts
Drag them down to my level and start stumping them down below.
or
Ignore it because I simply can't be bothered
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
916 Posts
Ive never had a problem here at least. INFPS are generally docile, or reserved. I think at most since we might have passionate disagreements. I think thats to be expected when we feel strongly on a given topic. I personally, when someone disagrees with me might take it personally at first. But, I usually try to ponder on what has been said to add to my views and to see where they are coming from. Disagreements I think can be a learning experience if intelligently dealt with. Belittling and puts downs of course give little to be learned, but yeah I try to take things with an open mind, even if it takes time to get there.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
431 Posts
I never felt insulted here on this site, I've read some posts I really disagreed with but it never really gets to me on that type of level... if someone were to try and personally attack me I wouldn't mind too much, I got more worse things to worry about than someone I don't even know trying to hurt my feelings threw the internet
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
37 Posts
I know it is VERY hard for me to not take things personally; it can be a weak point of many INFPs. In an effort to defend an idea or feeling, we can seem overly sensitive.
Unfortunately same here. Some people seem to think that the internet is not serious (???) and that gives them the right to behave like asshats to everyone else.

Fortunately, for me there is a solution: the fine art of not giving a fuck. It`s not easy, but I practice it as much as I can, I nurture it, let it grow... As the penguins from Madagascar would say:
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,980 Posts
I hardly ever get offended and if I do, I never show it.

If you're specifically talking about Personality Cafe, I don't
think I have ever had problem with a member on here.

In argument/discussions I just give my opinion and "walk" away.

Use logic and humor to cripple their argument.
Educated minds think alike!

*high fives Lad*

:proud:
 
1 - 20 of 33 Posts
Top