[Etherealite]

Whether you know them as friends, acquaintances, SOs, etc... what do you appreciate most about them? What do you not like about them?

 

[crazyeddie]

Confusing, but cool. My mom is an INFJ (with a side-order of INFP), one of my colleagues in the philosophy department is an INFJ, and Plato was an INFJ, and I've read enough stuff by him that I feel like I know him. Hmm. Well, INFJs are actually kinda similar to INTPs in some ways, which is pretty cool (Ni, Ti). The main difference is that high Fe. Gives y'all more passion, but you can lock onto certain ideas because they're nice, not because they make sense (Platonic idealism, I'm looking at you). And sometimes, you get upset about things that us INTPs can tell are mode-locked. If things really can't be otherwise, how upset should we be about them?

Still, the passion is pretty cool

 

[Draco]

Like INTP's on steroids . . or maybe it's more like Ritalin

I admire how focussed and passionate they can be. And at times even how organized they can be.

Other times its these exact same things that bug the hell out of me.

 

[Hruberen]

My ex was INFJ, when we broke up I asked hew why, and she said that she liked another guy the whole time, which was weird since she was practically begging me to ask her out at the beginning of the relationship.

I also have a really good INFJ friend, who I can have deep meaningful conversations with, that I can have with him and noone else. I think he may be my favorite friend, although it can be hard to hang out sometimes as we are both introverts.

 

[skycloud86]

I don't personally believe I know any INFJs outside of this forum, and have no general opinion of them either way.

 

[Samurai Blur]

I know one INFJ that I can think of. She's cool and fun to go out on the weekend with, but not really much more. She always sends me messages that are just smiley faces or says hi and then doesn't respond when I say hi and ask her how she's doing. It's kind of annoying so I don't really take much of what she says seriously, since I never know what part of the conversation she will cut out on and not message me again for weeks. So.. the INFJ I know is pretty cool to be around, a nightmare to try and have a text conversation with, and pretty flakey. We dated for a little while at one point and I couldn't handle her being so concerned with people getting upset with her for mundane things. It really left no time for depth in our relationship because we couldn't have a conversation without her worrying that she had something else to attend in order to not upset someone.

 

[TrailMix]

I've met two INFJs in my life. One of them is a good friend of mine and the other I knew rather distantly...

Two isnt a good sample, but I like them for the most part. They can be a bit melodramatic and ask too many questions tho haha.

 

[Moon_Child]

I'm currently dating an INFJ and they are very nice and extremely passionate. They are more logical than some INTPs I've met; yeah, weird.

I'm actually surprised that all this time I thought the F would make them too feel-y. Eh, not the case. He's managed to surprise me with his acute observations...

They also seem to balance me out. I'm a bit harsh, and they have a way of getting you to see things more positively without trying to sound too idealistic.

Hmmm... highly creative. Their intelligence seems to ignite most of their creativity.

@Draco Def. like INTPs on steroids haha. Very ambitious. Obsessive over details; at least he is.

I'm actually sitting next to him right now and he's watching this video:

 

[JollyBard]

Man, INFJs are so diverse I can,t give a clear answer to that... However, I am currently enamored with one :kitteh:

 

[Playful Proxy]

The only one I knew was as fickle as can be in both her emotions and her decisions. Her emotions ran her actions and her emotions were in so many directions, I gave up trying to think she would be reliable. This is all the experience I have and I must be careful not to draw a generalization from such a small sample.

 

[Eleventeenth]

Super sweet, smarty pants, would do just about anything for the people that they love. INTP's and INFJ's can have loads of fun together. The level to which they are affected by other people requires a paradigm adjustment for the INTP because we are quite opposite in this area. Shared Ti/Fe makes for great communication. I'm surprised to hear about INFJ's cheating or liking other people while they are in a relationship because I get a sense of great loyalty from them - but maybe these things are individual rather than type related.

 

[TheOwl]

The only one I knew was as fickle as can be in both her emotions and her decisions. Her emotions ran her actions and her emotions were in so many directions, I gave up trying to think she would be reliable. This is all the experience I have and I must be careful not to draw a generalization from such a small sample.

Sounds like me. I explain it with my being feeling inferior.

Anyway, I know 2. The male INFJ is very happy-go-lucky and always making people laugh and helping them out. The female one is overbearing and gossipy and gives out a ton of compliments.

 

[QuietStorm]

I'm actually a borderline INFJ .....

I guess I admire their ability to stick to something once they've made their minds up - it must be nice to be absolutely sure what you're doing is right and be 100% devoted. I actually doubt I could do that even if I was an INFJ. But I don't know any personally, I just know the type description.

 

[Nordom]

To describe them briefly - high integrity, honest, understanding, compassionate, give way more than they take, perhaps a bit sensitive, and occasionally preachy but open minded, try to keep everyone happy, strong in their beliefs, and kind.

Love 'em. We need way more of them.

 

[JollyBard]

Yeah, they're great. NFJs generally make me feel so very comfy...

 

[Dupree]

I usually become instantly irritated when we discuss differing beliefs because they become unbearably condescending (ENFJ's are worse). Otherwise, I love them. Unlike any other type, I usually haven't given much prior thought into what they express, yet I agree and identify with nearly all of it.

 

[bengalcat]

And sometimes, you get upset about things that us INTPs can tell are mode-locked. If things really can't be otherwise, how upset should we be about them?

Probably not that much. I too wonder what the point of being so annoyed about something that seems fairly "fact of life"-ish is. Doesn't mean I can stop being affected by it. I agree but it's not like caring is something that I can just turn off at will.

Perhaps that is part of the point. There do need to be the crazies, the unreasonable, uber-idealistic, non-compromising crazies because maybe life is a little too bleak with complete acceptance of "the way things are".

I guess I admire their ability to stick to something once they've made their minds up - it must be nice to be absolutely sure what you're doing is right and be 100% devoted. I actually doubt I could do that even if I was an INFJ. .

Hah! Hahah! Hahaha ha.... Ha... Yes. Yeah it would be nice to be absolutely sure what you're doing is right. I'm pretty devoted (maybe more like 95%) but that's from a choice to be devoted, from the feeling that to really give something a chance at succeeding you need to go all in. But I'm definitely not absolutely sure that what I'm doing or supporting is right. I think that's something that makes me (and maybe other INFJs?) seem aloof and distant... I'm constantly turning things over trying to figure out where things stand, if what I'm doing makes sense, how it fits into the bigger picture, what the problems are, what my real motivations are... Even when I'm involved in causes I find them hard to join and hard to sell. I think if I were absolutely 100% sure of things this would be less the case. I worry a lot about how I know I'm being responsible and doing something helpful more than I'm doing harm, because I know I don't always have enough experience, or information, or foresight, or imagination.

Don't be under any illusions that an INFJ existence is a peaceful one. There is something really nice is going full-court press for a goal, especially when afterwards you feel like it did ultimately result in something beneficial for others, but I don't tend to live feeling like I know everything I believe in and want is absolutely right. I'm actually quite scared of that type of thinking and I think I've heard other INFJs express something similar too.

 

[Mariz]

Their rooms are cleaner than mine.


I kinda envy them on that aspect.

 

[27377]

the whole lock-mode and fickle (in love) thing is def a sign of a young INFJ. I can certainly say I was that way. blame it on an over-developed Fe and underdeveloped Ti. Ti usually kicks in around our 20's and leads to A LOT of growth. prior to then, we can be highly judgemental, definite know-it-all's, inflexible when it comes to our beliefs, and in my case...immature when it comes to love, or better stated...immature when it comes to selecting the right partner. Many times it resulted in falling in love too quickly, or falling out of love too quickly, usually as a result of realizing, I fell too quickly into a relationship. After the initial "fun" stage sets in, many times I would realize how un-suited my partner and I was for each other. I actually didn't grow out of that until my 30's. I blame it on INFJ idealism...then of course we mature and Ti kick in and gives INFJ idealism a real good kick in the nuts. *sigh*

Anyway, once Ti kicks in, INFJ's have the ability to become extremely open-minded individuals, almost on par with INTP's I think. I've read ppl mention how INFJ's can sound almost like INTP's when explaining certain things. I definitely agree with those statements and thank Ti for that. It makes me question the validity of my feeling's, and acts as a counter-balance to my Fe. It helps give way to reason and logical ways of thinking. Of course, Fe usually wins out in the end, but I can't even begin to describe, the intense internal battle that occurs between Fe and Ti. It's almost like an angel and devil speaking to me and they are usually in full on debate mode.

I'm learning to quiet the Fe in certain situations. Situations when emotions should not be a factor in making a decision. I usually run to my INTP bf for help in that area. It's still a work in process I have to admit. Damn Fe! *shakes fist* LOL.

 

[Sevchenko]

My best friend is an INFJ. He's smartish, pretty intuitive, good sense of humor, can be very argumentative, is very lazy and has pretty strongly held beliefs (irrational as some may be).

Good guy