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Discussion Starter #1
I've been looking into my Ennengram type and think I closely identify with the 4 type with the 5 wing. I guess all variants could be welcomed but I was trying to find information on what a 4w5 would look like with a sexual stacking first and foremost? Any information on that? I believe I type as sx/so but I would also be open to reading other interpretations that enlist the wing and how the variants pull on the type.

4w5 tends to be more introspective but would a sexual variant also make them more out going/open in a way to establish deeper interpersonal connections?
 

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Well, I'm a 4w5 sx/sp. I'm withdrawn but if I'm drawn to someone I can become very assertive. I can seem relatively extroverted with someone I like but otherwise I'm pretty much mute. With a sexual 4w5 you get a lot of push and pull, withdrawing one minute, merging the next. I'd say sexual 4w5s are quite enigmatic, hard to figure out- unpredictable.
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Yeah see when I am around someone that I really like when I first meet them I tend to want to be around them all the time even though I may not act on it I will think about it a lot and it's a bit obsessive. I will also become more extroverted by putting myself in their sphere, contacting them and going out of my way to be where they are so to speak. I'm wondering if that is common with other E4w5's. I also believe I have a 1w2 and 7w6 in my tri-type however.
 

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Yeah see when I am around someone that I really like when I first meet them I tend to want to be around them all the time even though I may not act on it I will think about it a lot and it's a bit obsessive. I will also become more extroverted by putting myself in their sphere, contacting them and going out of my way to be where they are so to speak. I'm wondering if that is common with other E4w5's. I also believe I have a 1w2 and 7w6 in my tri-type however.
Yeah, I relate. I can get crazy obsessive and I (embarrassingly) can veer into stalker territory in those instances- or did, rather. But I still have the potential.
 

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Ocean-moonshine
This site describes all the variants down to a T. You can always google 4w5 sx too. I think there are people out there who ask the same questions. I know I did/do.

I basically feel very hollow without something to engage my sx. I get really scatterbrained and can't focus on things I have to focus on without feeling just utterly bored.. and it's like, the most frustrating and sometimes almost unbearable kind of bored. When unhealthier, I think I feel almost like a leech around people, especially ones I find interesting. I will ask endless questions and try to put all of the pieces together all the while and just try to suck in their energy without really sharing a lot myself. When healthier, my sp acts more as a boundary and I am more aware of respecting people's spaces and what not.

I'm either the one wanting to withdraw and just go home and be in my own company or I'll be the one who wants to stay up the whole night and morning because I have so much energy for intense interactions and stuff. It's pretty off/on like @brainheart said.

I also think with the 5 wing and sexual dom, there's a lot more introspecting and recognizing emotional states.. or just trying to intellectualize everything or amplifying it in some way.
 

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I have nothing specifically original to add, other than I'm a 4w5 sx/sp and I can very much relate to every single thing others have posted so far. I'm very obsessive at times, often embarrassingly so... though I try my best not to show the full extent of it, haha. "Creeper" and "stalker" are not words I want anyone to associate with me. :S I'm drawn to extremely intense relationships -- and those are pretty much the only types of relationships I want. Normally I'm very introverted and withdrawn, without a huge interest in socialising, but when I have a particular person in mind -- and this very much goes for just platonic feelings as well -- I'll obsess and go to what seem like crazy lengths to connect with this person.

As a side note, I've always been a little irritated that they chose the word 'sexual' to describe this variant. I'm not a very sexual person at all when it comes to actual sex... but oh well.
 

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I agree with and relate to all the comments on here, with the exception of the stalker tendencies. I've always had a lot of self control in that area where I can cut it off at that point and move on.

There's something else I'd like to add. I'm not sure if other 4w5 Sx/Sp's share this with me, if it's different with me because I'm an extrovert, if it's due to me being an ENFP 4w5 Sx/Sp specifically, or if it's just something about me in particular. Anyways, I am extremely open with things about myself. I have no shame (countershame?) and no boundaries, I just want to share who I am with others eager to merge with me.

I really have no fear in that area either. I just want to be known and to truly know others. Now, this isn't with everyone, but with people who have let me in I have no boundaries. I'm also very open with people I've just met, if they are accepting and interested.

When I encounter someone who doesn't want that kind of closeness, whether it's a platonic or romantic relationship, I drive them away. It's like I'm saying, "Why give you the best of me if you're not willing to return the favor?" I have no problem with this and I feel no regrets in doing so, because to me that kind of relationship has very little value. I'd way rather be alone and I feel resentful of the other person "using me" and denying me what I want and need.
 

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I agree with and relate to all the comments on here, with the exception of the stalker tendencies. I've always had a lot of self control in that area where I can cut it off at that point and move on.

There's something else I'd like to add. I'm not sure if other 4w5 Sx/Sp's share this with me, if it's different with me because I'm an extrovert, if it's due to me being an ENFP 4w5 Sx/Sp specifically, or if it's just something about me in particular. Anyways, I am extremely open with things about myself. I have no shame (countershame?) and no boundaries, I just want to share who I am with others eager to merge with me.

I really have no fear in that area either. I just want to be known and to truly know others. Now, this isn't with everyone, but with people who have let me in I have no boundaries. I'm also very open with people I've just met, if they are accepting and interested.

When I encounter someone who doesn't want that kind of closeness, whether it's a platonic or romantic relationship, I drive them away. It's like I'm saying, "Why give you the best of me if you're not willing to return the favor?" I have no problem with this and I feel no regrets in doing so, because to me that kind of relationship has very little value. I'd way rather be alone and I feel resentful of the other person "using me" and denying me what I want and need.
Hmm, well I'll be candid: I don't know if it's the ENFP or what, but I've always gotten more of a 7w6 sx/sp vibe from you than 4w5, kind of a Walt Whitman quality (and I feel like what you say here supports my hunch). Believe me, this is a huge compliment from me. Not only is Walt Whitman one of my most favorite people (and poets), but if I could choose a type to be other than who I am, this would be it.

(I've seen Whitman typed as both a 4w3 and a 7, by the way, but I think sexual seven fits him really well.)
 

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Hmm, well I'll be candid: I don't know if it's the ENFP or what, but I've always gotten more of a 7w6 sx/sp vibe from you than 4w5, kind of a Walt Whitman quality (and I feel like what you say here supports my hunch). Believe me, this is a huge compliment from me. Not only is Walt Whitman one of my most favorite people (and poets), but if I could choose a type to be other than who I am, this would be it.
I don't relate to any of the 7w6 descriptions. I just don't have the need for stimulation, the adventurousness, or the passion for experience. I'm also much, much less outgoing than any other ENFP I've met. People think that I'm an introvert because I am very withdrawn until someone engages me in a conversation. Then I make a dramatic switch and open up because it energizes me so much. The other ENFP's I've met have a consistent moderately high level of intensity. I have 2 settings: off and on.

Another possibility to consider is a different MBTI type. I display strong Ne, Te, and Fi with no Si. Could I be an INFP with a 7w6 enneagram type? That doesn't make sense with all the Te. Could I be an INTJ? No, there's not a drop of Ni in me and I'm overflowing with Ne.

I don't think I come off as a 7w6 Sx/Sp ENFP in my videos either. Take a look at the following example. I'm primarily displaying Ne-Te yet I seem very mellow. This doesn't remind me of anyone of any type that I've ever seen: withdrawn Ne-Te seems very unusual because it's usually assertive or at least compliant. That's what it is though, you can see the disorganized bouncing between ideas of Ne coupled with the comparative, structured logic of Te.


What do you think?
 

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@Bumblyjack, fair enough. That's just my impression based on things you've said about yourself. You seem relatively optimistic, well adjusted, and you seem to let go of people relatively easily, while fours tend to internally rehash and mourn ad infinitum. Sx/sp sevens don't seem to be so crazy to me. Examples would be Gael Garcia Bernal and Kurt Vonnegut (and I believe Whitman). I don't see any of them presenting as super extroverted. Sx/sp sevens strike me as the most four-ish sevens, pretty introspective but they don't seem to get so bogged down by it, more likely to know how to exist within the world and interact with others.

But if you don't relate to seven, you don't relate to seven. And that is that... :)

 

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You seem relatively optimistic, well adjusted, and you seem to let go of people relatively easily, while fours tend to internally rehash and mourn ad infinitum.
Sx/sp sevens strike me as the most four-ish sevens, pretty introspective but they don't seem to get so bogged down by it, more likely to know how to exist within the world and interact with others.
I am very optimistic, for everyone but myself. I want to inspire others, I want them to believe in themselves and live glorious happy lives. I don't believe that things will turn out well for me, but I believe in all of you. I'm infinitely more bogged down than I've ever shared on here, because I don't want to infect others with it. That's the reason I don't express that stuff. I don't want others to comfort me in my misery, I want to take care of it myself and keep it inside where it can't hurt anyone else. It's a burden that I choose to bear alone.

Also, it's easy to let others go if you never really, fully let them in despite how much you want to.
 

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I am very optimistic, for everyone but myself. I want to inspire others, I want them to believe in themselves and live glorious happy lives. I don't believe that things will turn out well for me, but I believe in all of you. I'm infinitely more bogged down than I've ever shared on here, because I don't want to infect others with it. That's the reason I don't express that stuff. I don't want others to comfort me in my misery, I want to take care of it myself and keep it inside where it can't hurt anyone else. It's a burden that I choose to bear alone.

Also, it's easy to let others go if you never really, fully let them in despite how much you want to.
Ah okay! Now I understand. And I can relate very much to this sentiment, except that's how I am with my husband, my kids. Less so on here.
 

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Ah okay! Now I understand. And I can relate very much to this sentiment, except that's how I am with my husband, my kids. Less so on here.
On here, and on the type 4 forums especially, I just see an awful lot of commiserating. That's good but rather than joining in I like to offer encouragement instead. Kiersey described ENFP's as having a natural passion for being "Inspirers". Maybe across the whole type his generalization is accurate or maybe it's not, I don't know, but in my specific case it's true.
 

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I am very optimistic, for everyone but myself. I want to inspire others, I want them to believe in themselves and live glorious happy lives. I don't believe that things will turn out well for me, but I believe in all of you. I'm infinitely more bogged down than I've ever shared on here, because I don't want to infect others with it. That's the reason I don't express that stuff. I don't want others to comfort me in my misery, I want to take care of it myself and keep it inside where it can't hurt anyone else. It's a burden that I choose to bear alone.

Also, it's easy to let others go if you never really, fully let them in despite how much you want to.
Unless I'm really depressed and trying to push people away, I'm like this as well (but in more of an INFP way than ENFP way). I'd rather just be present, listen and support other people in what they're doing than let them in on what's going on with me. I don't offer people a way in unless there's a really special bond or I know that person won't try to comment.
 

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I am very optimistic, for everyone but myself. I want to inspire others, I want them to believe in themselves and live glorious happy lives. I don't believe that things will turn out well for me, but I believe in all of you. I'm infinitely more bogged down than I've ever shared on here, because I don't want to infect others with it. That's the reason I don't express that stuff. I don't want others to comfort me in my misery, I want to take care of it myself and keep it inside where it can't hurt anyone else. It's a burden that I choose to bear alone.

Also, it's easy to let others go if you never really, fully let them in despite how much you want to.
You know, I'm a sx/sp 7 and I can relate to what you wrote there. Maybe because my heart fix is 4. I'm not a very outgoing person either, and I hate the happy-go-lucky stereotype with a passion (but then again, I hate all the stereotypes).
 

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Testing.

10 chars
 

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Well, I'm a 4w5 sx/sp. I'm withdrawn but if I'm drawn to someone I can become very assertive. I can seem relatively extroverted with someone I like but otherwise I'm pretty much mute. With a sexual 4w5 you get a lot of push and pull, withdrawing one minute, merging the next. I'd say sexual 4w5s are quite enigmatic, hard to figure out- unpredictable.
Yes to all of the above- I’m a complete 4w5 sx.
 

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I enjoy connecting with people deeply and having discussions with them for a long periods of time. I'm the kind of person who wants to know everything about them and sort of figure them out. Don't really like superficial connections with others, I like getting close to them and loving them as a whole.
 

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As a ENFP 4w5 with a sx/so stacking, I can relate to the complete on off modes. Either I'm obsessed with you or if you ¨disappoint¨me as a human, usually when someone lies or is fake, i go completely off. and it's so abrupt sometimes i even scare myself , like, shouldn't i care more
 
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