Friendship is loyalty, trust, honesty and fun. I don't care if the person is argumentative or has their own opinion, agreeing with me on everything is not a friendship but someone who is always the same.....someone who is true to themselves no matter who is around. They are people I want to befriend. Friendship is having someone's back when life sucks and sharing the fun times when life is good.
The same transcends with a relationship.....only there is great sex, flirting and conquering goals together.

This is very ESTP! If you know hundreds of people, then it is impossible to know them all by name. I can recall conversations with people to the word, even if they occurred a long time ago. I know what is going on in people's lives. So, if I forget their name, then so be it, LOL! Most people are not offended by this if you are consistently of kind demeanor, it's a detail not everyone is good at. I try to find a pneumonic device to help me remember people's names that I *should* remember if I am having trouble doing so.

Swish36 said:

I have friends and a lot of people who I know just for their name, and there's some who I know by their faces.

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Swish36 said:

it's crazy because there's a few of my friends bring my other friends down or banter them until they feel like poopoo. And I don't understand why they do that. Maybe I do know but not at this moment.
But what do you do when your friend is like, making your other friend feel like poopoo?

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I do not let this type of behavior happen in my presence. Don't get me wrong, I am a wicked smart ass, and regularly tear up my best of friends with verbal nonsense, and take my own share in return, but it is all in good fun, and no one walks off from it feeling like shit. I honestly don't like it when people are mean to others, it is a form of bullying, which is essentially insecurity and ignorance all mixed into one, and I detest both.

njchick said:

Friendship is loyalty, trust, honesty and fun. I don't care if the person is argumentative or has their own opinion, agreeing with me on everything is not a friendship but someone who is always the same.....someone who is true to themselves no matter who is around. They are people I want to befriend.

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Wow. Perfectly stated. I love opinionated people, whether they agree with me or not, as long as they can hold their ground and are cool about it, I think its great!

It is refreshing to be around folks who don't kiss ass depending on who else is around. I am the same no matter who meets me, in any place, at any time. I've been scolded for this by some, but I don't care. :laughing:

njchick said:

Friendship is having someone's back when life sucks and sharing the fun times when life is good.
The same transcends with a relationship.....only there is great sex, flirting and conquering goals together.

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Rock on with your bad self:

friendship + animistic attraction + common life goals = true romance

Hell yeah.

I don't even know how many times I've given people this speech while I was drunk. Basically, one huge thing with me is honestly. To be my friend you must be honest with me, I really don't tolerate any sort of lying and bullshitting. You've got to be loyal too, trustworthy, and someone that despite the fact that I'm not very sentimental, I know will hear me out if really need it.

As far as making other people feel like shit, I don't tolerate that either. Even if I'm annoyed with said person that's made to feel like poop, I take a stance to defend them if they're not able to do so themselves. I mean, when someone is saying something to somebody else and it's deserved, I let it be said. If it crosses the line of just plain bashing, then I put an end to it.

I'm the only one allowed to fuck around with my friends, but once someone else does it I get pissed. Meh, It's just the way I operate.

I also look for honesty, trustworthiness, and loyalty. I also look for who I can have fun with. I can't sit still and just have conversations the whole time. I think you all can relate to that. :wink: I always make sure that my friends can handle my jokes and know that when I say something that's "mean" to them, I'm only joking. And I expect for them to do the same to me. I just don't like being proper all the time and being nice to eachother. It gets boring. I'll walk by a friend and do a random "f*** you!" to him and he'll say something right back! It adds entertainment to the friendships haha

I do like people who are outspoken and have opinions, but there's a line I draw. If I have to hear an opinion on everything that's mentioned in a conversation------see ya! Some people I know are like broken records and I can predict what they're going to say right after I say something. If I'm talking about a girl to a friend of mine, I'm expecting his three sentence opinion of her that comes after whenever the girl's name is mentioned. It's just like," come on, I can remember it word for word after hearing it the first time. But do you have to say it everytime???"

My memory of conversations are so good and I remember the most minute things about people. Faces and names are not a problem for me either. My friends are amazed by how many people I know by face and can pick them out from a distance before my friends can even get a clear look at them . Our brains are ridiculous, haha

Swish36 said:

Deep question for some of us and my friend of mine randomly asked me this... I was stumped, because I was playing Wii Tennis. Lol.

And I gave a generic answer with some funnies in it.
"A Friend is someone who is there and loyal, trustwrothy and honest. And has benefits. Someone who likes Milkshakes...And you know how Oil and water don't mix? Friendship is Water and Water mixed there they just connect. Fluidly..."

But now, as I think back, it's making me think about it.
I think having integrity, trustful and honest is a big three for me. Like, just don't lie! Geeezus

I have friends and a lot of people who I know just for their name, and there's some who I know by their faces. it's crazy because there's a few of my friends bring my other friends down or banter them until they feel like poopoo. And I don't understand why they do that. Maybe I do know but not at this moment.
But what do you do when your friend is like, making your other friend feel like poopoo?

Friends dont make other friends feel like Ostrich Dung...putting their heads into a hole. smh.

So yea, Friendship?

(I wanna ask about Love but that's another thread at some other time)

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I agree Swish

Swish36 said:

It's crazy because there's a few of my friends bring my other friends down or banter them until they feel like poopoo. And I don't understand why they do that. Maybe I do know but not at this moment.

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But we are freedom loving and do not strive for power. The ESTJs and ENTJs are all about power, and the second rule from the book 48 laws of power was: Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies.

The author has his points, but basically what he says is friends are less predictable than your enemy. Enemies are always going to hurt you. Friends may help or hurt you.

And feelers are great at having empathy for others until they feel badly. Then they will suck a room dry for a feeling pick me up if need be.

I wish the world had the same views on friends that ESTPs did. I think for the most part we strive for the win-win.

Omg, yes. Sooooo important because what is more better than someone who knows themselves the best?!?! Hallelujah.

njchick said:

Friendship is loyalty, trust, honesty and fun. I don't care if the person is argumentative or has their own opinion, agreeing with me on everything is not a friendship but someone who is always the same.....someone who is true to themselves no matter who is around. They are people I want to befriend. Friendship is having someone's back when life sucks and sharing the fun times when life is good.
The same transcends with a relationship.....only there is great sex, flirting and conquering goals together.

Click to expand...

Halla74 said:

This is very ESTP! If you know hundreds of people, then it is impossible to know them all by name. I can recall conversations with people to the word, even if they occurred a long time ago. I know what is going on in people's lives. So, if I forget their name, then so be it, LOL! Most people are not offended by this if you are consistently of kind demeanor, it's a detail not everyone is good at. I try to find a pneumonic device to help me remember people's names that I *should* remember if I am having trouble doing so.

Rock on with your bad self:

friendship + animistic attraction + common life goals = true romance

Hell yeah.

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Hell yessss.
"you look sooooo familiar!!! I KNOW YOU!! Wait, what's your name?"
HhHHAHAHAH!!!

thefistofreality said:

I don't even know how many times I've given people this speech while I was drunk. Basically, one huge thing with me is honestly. To be my friend you must be honest with me, I really don't tolerate any sort of lying and bullshitting. You've got to be loyal too, trustworthy, and someone that despite the fact that I'm not very sentimental, I know will hear me out if really need it.

As far as making other people feel like shit, I don't tolerate that either. Even if I'm annoyed with said person that's made to feel like poop, I take a stance to defend them if they're not able to do so themselves. I mean, when someone is saying something to somebody else and it's deserved, I let it be said. If it crosses the line of just plain bashing, then I put an end to it.

I'm the only one allowed to fuck around with my friends, but once someone else does it I get pissed. Meh, It's just the way I operate.

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"TFOR" That's your initials for "thefistofreality", and it also means, Totally Feeling On your Response.
I totally dig how you Operate, even if you sound like a robot because of the word "operate" but its all goood!!
Ohhh man, I wish I was drinking when that they asked me that question...

Derosa90 said:

I also look for honesty, trustworthiness, and loyalty. I also look for who I can have fun with. I can't sit still and just have conversations the whole time. I think you all can relate to that. I always make sure that my friends can handle my jokes and know that when I say something that's "mean" to them, I'm only joking. And I expect for them to do the same to me. I just don't like being proper all the time and being nice to eachother. It gets boring. I'll walk by a friend and do a random "f*** you!" to him and he'll say something right back! It adds entertainment to the friendships haha

I do like people who are outspoken and have opinions, but there's a line I draw. If I have to hear an opinion on everything that's mentioned in a conversation------see ya! Some people I know are like broken records and I can predict what they're going to say right after I say something. If I'm talking about a girl to a friend of mine, I'm expecting his three sentence opinion of her that comes after whenever the girl's name is mentioned. It's just like," come on, I can remember it word for word after hearing it the first time. But do you have to say it everytime???"

My memory of conversations are so good and I remember the most minute things about people. Faces and names are not a problem for me either. My friends are amazed by how many people I know by face and can pick them out from a distance before my friends can even get a clear look at them . Our brains are ridiculous, haha

Click to expand...

YEEEASSSSSSSS!.
I do the same thinggg. Like I say something and I'll look for a reaction just once and I'll adjust. And without kinda adjusting, it'll be the same thing over and over again! not gooood.
Thats' awesome man...Oh, and F*** you tooo!!!! hahha

elvis2010 said:

But we are freedom loving and do not strive for power. The ESTJs and ENTJs are all about power, and the second rule from the book 48 laws of power was: Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies.

The author has his points, but basically what he says is friends are less predictable than your enemy. Enemies are always going to hurt you. Friends may help or hurt you.

And feelers are great at having empathy for others until they feel badly. Then they will suck a room dry for a feeling pick me up if need be.

I wish the world had the same views on friends that ESTPs did. I think for the most part we strive for the win-win.

Click to expand...

Thanks Elvis. You made me realize what type of person my friend is and they do want this "power" they want so bad... Goshhh, it's nothing really that serious, i mean, yea you can tell people what to do but to a point where you make people dislike you? Ccmon.
You're totally right about that Win-Win. I lovee how everyone is just happy and where everybody wins and comes out FULL. But not bloated.. That's when you get tooo full and you don't want to do anything because you tend to get sleepy when you eat way too much.

I also wish that the world had the same views on friends, but it would be kinda weird. Sure I'd like someone like me, but not all the time! That would be like Masturbating...
...

Lol, uhm. wait, didn't come out right..

Anyways, enjoy life!!!!

Hey, yeah. That's an interresting topic.

I can't remember, how often i've discussed this with others. But it was really often...
I have three circles of friends.

The first one consists mainly of my oldest and closest friends and most of them I know from my childhood. These friends are close to my soul and I have no doubt, I can open my heart and share my most intimate thoughts and sorrows with them. I know I could call them at 3 am and they wouldn't complain because they know there would be a really good reason for me to disturb their sleep. I don't like the word soulmate, but for a better delimitation let's call them soulmates.

The second one are some chosen colleagues and some mutual friends. Most of them I know for at least ten years. This clique is the one to have jaunty fun like drinking, dancing, picking up girls, attending rock festivals, etc. Let's call them friends.

The third circle are the lots of pals you meet in your life. These guys/girls are fun to talk to. Most of them I only meet once or twice a year. But when we meet, it's always good atmosphere.

For me, the soulmates are genderless! Some of them are female and really hot. But I would never think of screwing them. They are far to valuable and rare to destroy the friendship with common things like sex... :dry:

The friend-friends are not genderless. So hey... :tongue:

And the pals. Well, they are what they are: just pals.

dude, ESTPs you guys are so cool!!!! i love how you are all buddies with one another and you are all really positive and easy-going, your threads always make me laugh a little bit!!!

author robert greene. good book although i've only read through about half of it. i need to finish it off. i wonder if all ESTPs are procrastinators?

anyway, on friendship ....

i would say i have hundreds of acquaintances but few true 'friends' that i trust completely 100% and would bend-over-backwards for.

loyalty is probably the #1 trait that stands out to me, perhaps because it is the trait i project the most. if you are my friend, i am loyal to you until the end.

and yah i am horrible with names. too many times i have the "hey man what's up?" conversation because i remember faces, conversations we had, etc. but never their damn name !

would you ESTPs say you have more acquaintances then friends? an acquaintance is really just a stranger i meet once that turns into seeing him/her again at some point in the future, then again, and again until it becomes almost like a friend but not-quite.

elvis2010 said:

But we are freedom loving and do not strive for power. The ESTJs and ENTJs are all about power, and the second rule from the book 48 laws of power was: Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies.

The author has his points, but basically what he says is friends are less predictable than your enemy. Enemies are always going to hurt you. Friends may help or hurt you.

And feelers are great at having empathy for others until they feel badly. Then they will suck a room dry for a feeling pick me up if need be.

I wish the world had the same views on friends that ESTPs did. I think for the most part we strive for the win-win.

Click to expand...

here is a simple diagram of how i view friendships and acquaintances

the black circle represents my life from birth to death.

the red circle represents someone that i remain friends with for my entire life.

the other circles represent various people i've "met along the way" that played some role in my life. maybe childhood, highschool or college friends.

some circles are larger and play a more prominent role in your life while others are smaller and were only in your life for a very short window. in reality there would be hundreds if not thousands of circles of various size.

and each of those circles would have their own set of circles for people that played roles in their lives. it was just something i thought about when high a couple months back about how to visualize all the people i have come to meet and know in my life.

like i mentioned in my last post, many many acquaintances but few true life long friends. i guess i'm kind of a drifter eh.

I meet a lot of people busking, so like expressed earlier in the thread, it becomes difficult to remember everyone's name. However, I'm not a huge extrovert - I like keeping in small groups of 4 or 5, even though I'll sometimes have 4 separate groups of 4 or 5; I'm not a big fan of huge groups or parties (I only like them for the activity; I hate lounge parties)

i also hate short sentences

For me, friendship is about participation. I don't really care if my friends ask about feelings I don't have or my personal life (though I do understand that that's often how people express friendship); for me, friendship means doing things with people. Literally whatever: movies, rock-climbing, playing music, anything. But I don't really like smalltalk (which I only recently realized, because I've always hated it, but I've also always been good at it, which is confusing), and activities are a great way to bond without it. It's also substantially more meaningful than smalltalk.

I would definitely say I have more acquaintances than friends. I was the most popular person in high school. Granted it was small and had only 400 kids, but that's not too bad eh? I knew everyone by name and they all knew me. I would hang out with them at parties and shoot the shit. But beyond that, I never really did too much with them. I only had 2 or 3 true friends throughout high school and I've lost interest in them a while ago because of differences. It doesn't bother me much because I know I don't need that social closure all the time. I'm fine with just having my family for the time being.

johnnyBuz said:

author robert greene. good book although i've only read through about half of it. i need to finish it off. i wonder if all ESTPs are procrastinators?

anyway, on friendship ....

i would say i have hundreds of acquaintances but few true 'friends' that i trust completely 100% and would bend-over-backwards for.

loyalty is probably the #1 trait that stands out to me, perhaps because it is the trait i project the most. if you are my friend, i am loyal to you until the end.

and yah i am horrible with names. too many times i have the "hey man what's up?" conversation because i remember faces, conversations we had, etc. but never their damn name !

would you ESTPs say you have more acquaintances then friends? an acquaintance is really just a stranger i meet once that turns into seeing him/her again at some point in the future, then again, and again until it becomes almost like a friend but not-quite.

Click to expand...