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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
ok the description was pretty angsty,so i decided to leave it out.anyway i like where the thread is headed.

so what have you LEARNT so far?
 

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i have learned the more i embrace solitude, the more i find the balance in getting what i want from the external world i live in.

i have learned that i am actually really well-liked by people and that if i just give simple cues that i am present, open, and ready to engage in a conversation, it's not hard for me at all to make friends.

i have learned that i can't just wait for a time to be transformed such as in, "once i get my braces off or lose weight, i'll be super attractive and be confident." transformation is a life long process and it doesn't stop.

i have learned that no matter what i do with my life that i want to empower people and so i've become a lot less apprehensive about my future as i've realized my path to fulfillment.

i have learned i actually don't know a lot and that i'm inept in a lot of ways and not to think of myself as the brightest, most capable person because while i'm very strong in anything concerning english, history, philosophy, psychology, and the humanities, i literally feel out of my element when it comes to anything regarding scientific or mathematical theory (i can understand their applications though). also, i'm not very hands on. i can't build anything and i fumble with very simple instructions. origami is my worst nightmare.

because of that, i have had to accept that i'm not perfect and be relieved that other people don't actually expect that much from me.

i have learned that all people want is to be accepted and liked for who they are and if you show to someone you accept and like them, it's very easy to make a friend.

a lot of my realizations have been, honestly, in the friendship-making process because for most of my life, i had really bad social anxiety and thought people hated me. coming from a family that's really critical, told me to stop crying, and that i was lazy, materialistic, and emotionally neglected at me then to school where people bullied me, i had built up years of thinking that i didn't have any value and that people thought i was weird and ugly (some people actually have told me that). once i realized that i contributed to people's perceptions of me and that i had to stop being reserved and start trusting people and not rely on being overwhelmingly absurd to get notice and/or liked, i found a lot about how people come not only with their own complexes and insecurities but in general, that friendship is actually simple. simple in its initiation but not necessarily easy.

by accepting and liking other people, i feel like i get closer to accepting and liking myself and further away from the family who has hurt me so much.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
i have learned the more i embrace solitude, the more i find the balance in getting what i want from the external world i live in.

i have learned that i am actually really well-liked by people and that if i just give simple cues that i am present, open, and ready to engage in a conversation, it's not hard for me at all to make friends.

i have learned that i can't just wait for a time to be transformed such as in, "once i get my braces off or lose weight, i'll be super attractive and be confident." transformation is a life long process and it doesn't stop.

i have learned that no matter what i do with my life that i want to empower people and so i've become a lot less apprehensive about my future as i've realized my path to fulfillment.

i have learned i actually don't know a lot and that i'm inept in a lot of ways and not to think of myself as the brightest, most capable person because while i'm very strong in anything concerning english, history, philosophy, psychology, and the humanities, i literally feel out of my element when it comes to anything regarding scientific or mathematical theory (i can understand their applications though). also, i'm not very hands on. i can't build anything and i fumble with very simple instructions. origami is my worst nightmare.

because of that, i have had to accept that i'm not perfect and be relieved that other people don't actually expect that much from me.

i have learned that all people want is to be accepted and liked for who they are and if you show to someone you accept and like them, it's very easy to make a friend.

a lot of my realizations have been, honestly, in the friendship-making process because for most of my life, i had really bad social anxiety and thought people hated me. coming from a family that's really critical, told me to stop crying, and that i was lazy, materialistic, and emotionally neglected at me then to school where people bullied me, i had built up years of thinking that i didn't have any value and that people thought i was weird and ugly (some people actually have told me that). once i realized that i contributed to people's perceptions of me and that i had to stop being reserved and start trusting people and not rely on being overwhelmingly absurd to get notice and/or liked, i found a lot about how people come not only with their own complexes and insecurities but in general, that friendship is actually simple. simple in its initiation but not necessarily easy.

by accepting and liking other people, i feel like i get closer to accepting and liking myself and further away from the family who has hurt me so much.
well i should've mentioned 'general' truth but these are what you've learnt from experience so they are valid.:)
ow and i realised something important after reading it.thank you.
 

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oh, well, in terms of general truth, i've learned that my individuality will present itself naturally and that i shouldn't do anything to emphasize it because if i go the whole "look at me, i'm cool and obscure route", i end up not only disliking myself but no one is that receptive to me. i've found more so that i have this desire to show people how much i can relate and empathize with them and that even though i'm pretty off-beat, i'm not that different. i think sometimes infp use "i'm too different" as a defense mechanism as to why they stay in their inner worlds and don't try to actively engage in friendships. or at least i did. xD
 

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So far, I think the one thing I've learned for sure is to not take anything too seriously. Not that I'm putting that into practice, haha (I'm not sure I even know how to not take everything so seriously), but I know just by the way my life has turned out that I would have a much easier time of it if I wasn't such a rigid perfectionist, if I wasn't stuck in the past and hung up on everything that's ever gone wrong, if I knew how to just "go with the flow" a little more... that sort of thing. Life happens. Learn from it. Forgive yourself. Move on. Embrace change. Be silly and spontaneous sometimes. Know that it's okay to screw up. Take risks -- you'll never get what you want if you don't.
 

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That life is precious, and each day is a gift. We like to dream of tomorrow and make plans and get caught up in everything, but we forget that for alot of people, tomorrow never comes. You get that phone call from your doctor that you dread, or you're in the wrong place at the wrong time, and just like that your life changes. Maybe you die, maybe you don't.

But know that everyday is a chance to make it all happen. Call up that friend you haven't talked to in years. Tell your family, your friends how much you love them and how much they mean to you. Go talk to that girl/guy you've had your eye on for a while but are too scared to talk to. Finish that novel you've stuffed away in the desk. Do that thing you allways think of and then say someday/ Live in the moment. Live your life like you're allready dead, like today is your last day, because one day it will be.
 

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It's all how you look at it, what you place meaning on and how you go about doing so.
 

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Things may seem worst from your perspective, but everyone else might be feeling the same way about themselves. Don't let your perceptions define you. Be yourself.

I agree, love is one of the most important things in the world. It's the context for all true joy and selflessness, and one of the most powerful and wonderful emotions/mindsets we humans know. And yes, it is also a mindset.

Don't waste your life. You only get one. And don't waste it indulging yourself, either. Selfishness can only lead to unhappiness in the long run. Besides, I doubt many people can honestly say they truly like jerks.

Maturity is a process that's never over. Things become much clearer with time, and yet we never stop learning. Maturity starts out as learning, and eventually becomes the deep engraining of everything we've learned into our thinking. Fresh ideas are like wet cement, and maturity is the hardening process.
 

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There isn't a single/right way to see things. Virtually everything is a matter of perspective, the angle from which you see something. Concepts like freedom, equality, justice mean different things to different people. Neither point of view is necessarily better than the other. MBTI and Enneagram types make up some of the prime lenses through which we see the world. Everybody is different on the inside, so they see things differently on the outside, and that deserves respect.

Science is probably the closest we can come to finding objective truth. Unfortunately, it can only explain the material world, so those who follow it as a religion become... well, materialistic. And so we have different kinds of art and music that appeal to different people; ethics and values that change over time and throughout individuals and cultures; and religions which attempt to explain the spiritual in different ways. Our own perception of God has evolved throughout time.

There is no way we can understand the subjective/metaphysical world in its entirety; at the most, all we can do is expand our view and respect all the other points of view. And personally, I believe that, even though specific values and judgements will change over time, there can still be universal principles to guide us, like say reason, joy, respect, love.
 

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Everything's a matter of perspective. You can spin a new viewpoint on any single outcome.

Appreciate what you have before it's gone. Literally everything is temporary.

Learn from every experience. It tends to help.

Selflessness is a good trait, but never neglect yourself. Your successes and downfalls have unequivocal impact on the people in your life.

Thank and appreciate people. It's the easiest way to make someone's day.

Do your best not to die. Bad drivers especially need to keep this in mind.

Everything in moderation.

Being open-minded makes life a lot better.
 

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I'm still very young (16), I still have a lot to learn, but I'm grad that I learned:

- Be honest, be honest to your close ones, friends, family and especially to yourself. I use to lie a lot about my backgrounds, my opinions, but I only brought misery to myself at the end. Some people will not accept you and you can completely ignore them, and some people will accept and love for who you are, those are your most precious friends and love one.

- LAUGH, just laugh very very often, enjoy every single moment of your life by laughing, everything can be frame positive. Don't take things seriously, but be passionate. Don't be scare of anything, if it turns out bad, you gonna have a good laugh about it. There's a Korean class that you are a little interested? Go ahead and register. Learn a lot, have fun. :D

- Complement, complement people and yourself. There's a lot of interesting people everywhere, sometimes we are too focus on ourself. Complement people, INFP, when you complement someone, people will feel that you genuine appreciate them. It make the person happy and yourself happy also. Sometimes, when people compliments you, you might feel uncomfortable, appreciate it, an actual person took the time to complement you. Compliment yourself, don't beat yourself up. Tell how confident and beautiful you are in the mirror, every morning.

I love you, INFP and every other type on this forum. <3
 
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