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So my wife is an INFJ, and she is getting bored with life. She says she needs a hobby, and video games aren't fulfilling to her anymore (she feels like she's wasting her time with nothing to show for it). I've suggested drawing and painting, but she said that doesn't interest her. I also suggested knitting, crochet, and/or embroidering, but she wasn't interested in those either. I suggested gardening and writing, but those didn't interest her either. I suggested sewing, which she does enjoy, but she said it's too expensive for where we're at financially.

Do you guys have any hobbies that are relatively inexpensive? Please share your thoughts and ideas!
 

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You lost me at "relatively inexpensive", LOL.
For some reason, all my hobbies have come with an expensive price tag, most likely because I only enjoy things if I'm doing them the "right" way, which usually involves study materials and equipment.

There's my gardening, which involved a full DIY hydro kit out, because of course my tomatoes must be the BEST tomatoes ever, or else I may as well not try. I get really discouraged and uninterested if I think I may as well not try.
I live in Florida with overly hot summers for fruit production and terrible bugs, all the tomato plants I put outside die, and also I just can't summon up as much interest for them once they become "tainted" by nature's control over everything. Indoors I control the temperature, light, feeding, ect... and no icky bugs ever touch my fruit.

I really want to do Pizza making the "right way", with artisanal yeast cultures & flour and good tools... But nobody will buy me a full-on brick outdoor oven :crying:

I read a LOT, but even that costs money! :rolleyes:


One inexpensive way to pursue new hobbies is to join groups where people can share resources... but the efficacy of this depends on your particular INFJ. What's her enneagram / instinctual variant? Social types would have a better experience in groups.

Whether she goes a task alone homebody style like me, or is tolerant of everyone around her screwing things up as a social variant... In either case INFJs can benefit from a group effect.
In my case that's through internet groups.
I join something and get myself excited about it before I begin. Then research heavily to plan how I want to do it, as most hobbies have variations. Then I make an equipment list, gather my tools, and finally begin after setting myself up to succeed.
All INFJs hate failure more than the average person. By hate here I mean we take it personally. A lot of types can "hate" failure but embrace it in order to improve. We can learn to do that I guess but it's extremely uncomfortable, and progress is more incremental.
There's not much gain in trying to fight the perfectionist nature, but find ways to make it work for rather than against one.

For less studious hobbies, ones that can surprise us in fun is active ones.
Dance lessons could be ideal if you can go regularly as a couple and support her through her initial hangups.
My longest lasting hobby was horsemanship... just not doing it right now (my horse died), but there seem to be quite a few INFJs who love horses. It offers an opportunity to bond & try to harmonize with a peaceful sensitive animal, meanwhile including other people and physical exercise during fun activities. The quality of experience is is highly dependent on the particular facility though, so it requires careful choice.
Just some ideas. Tell us more about her and maybe we can guess something ideal.
 

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Sharp Cutting Thing
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I am pretty good at doing stuff in the kitchen.

I just finished off a batch of homemade sauerkraut and saved the brine because that's some good shit, kraut brine, and i can intermix it with soy sauce for salt with a bit of sour. I made some homemade noodles the other day, too ... Cooking, done the right way, takes care and love and the best ingredients you can afford. Or luck into procuring.

I'm intending to start making a batch of kimchi soon. Actually, I want to try to mix things up! When I made the kraut it occurred to me that you can leave the cabbage as a whole leaf as long as you maintain the anaerobic environment for lacto-fermentation. So -- because of how I want to use the kimchi -- I'm going to ferment it as individual leaves and see how that turns out.

Deliciously, I hope.

Also, if you're following the idea of fermenting sauerkraut as individual leaves @Froody Blue Gem, another thought might have occurred to you -- making stuffed cabbage with whole-leaf sauerkraut.

@Sour Roses Well ... you know, you could always make your own oven!

 

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I think for infj the best hobbies are Se-like or Se-encouraging. Examples: tennis, sailing, horseback ridding, crossfit/aerobics (also good for Te), dancing. Personally, I also play an instrument and learn new languages.
 
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I am pretty good at doing stuff in the kitchen.

I just finished off a batch of homemade sauerkraut and saved the brine because that's some good shit, kraut brine, and i can intermix it with soy sauce for salt with a bit of sour. I made some homemade noodles the other day, too ... Cooking, done the right way, takes care and love and the best ingredients you can afford. Or luck into procuring.

I'm intending to start making a batch of kimchi soon. Actually, I want to try to mix things up! When I made the kraut it occurred to me that you can leave the cabbage as a whole leaf as long as you maintain the anaerobic environment for lacto-fermentation. So -- because of how I want to use the kimchi -- I'm going to ferment it as individual leaves and see how that turns out.

Deliciously, I hope.

Also, if you're following the idea of fermenting sauerkraut as individual leaves @Froody Blue Gem, another thought might have occurred to you -- making stuffed cabbage with whole-leaf sauerkraut.

@Sour Roses Well ... you know, you could always make your own oven!

That sounds like a great idea to make some kimchi. It sounds delicious and like it has potential to have all sorts of twists put on it which makes for fun. The sauerkraut is one of the best parts of that dish. I do love sauerkraut In my family with kielbasa, sometimes my dad purposefully overburns it because they prefer the taste. I guess it's okay but I like the less burned taste more.

Once you know what you want to make, it's very enjoyable. Even if you don't know, kind of discovering as you go along is part of the fun. Also, thinking about the people you are making it for enjoying the meal. Or just making a meal for yourself is great too. I always love trying the meal myself. I go overboard with that if I really like what is being made.

The whole leaf sourkraut does sound like a neat twist on it and using the whole leaves.

The earthen oven on the wagon is a cool concept too. It seems like it's a lot of hardwork to build. It would also make sense that the wood to ignite the fire lines the floor of the oven. It is also neat when he tries to find the right consistency with the clay and how the oven gets held together by that material. It would take a lot of precision and sturdiness.
 

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I think it's important that anyone have a wide range of hobbies that interest the varied aspects of our being.

Apart from playing a musical instrument, reading and the like I consider things like working out and yoga a hobby as well. Relatively inexpensive just a mat and videos solve that problem.

For the time being I have hobbies that are only lived vicariously through others on youtube and the like because of their high cost.

Cooking and baking is another one if you manage your budget well. I've taught myself various things in as little as 2 weeks and I always enjoy tweaking my recipes and proportions and spice mixes for the savory stuff.
 

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Cooking, writing, dancing, music (I play piano, guitar and I torture the violin but I'm working on it), exercising, reading
 

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I like going to hear live music on the weekend nights, singing, love swimming and trail running (hiking with a run). Meditation. Writing in journal. photography. reading. watching dvd series such as House MD and Jon+Kate Plus 8
 

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Video games. Oh wait, you mean things other than that...

I find it fulfilling to have a dog that's involved in agility/obedience/rally/etc competitions. It's a fun hobby to train the dog, and I feel like I'm getting something out of it by improving that dog's life, too. Bonus if they're a rescue .

I also do martial arts. Finding the right school is important...but there are some out there that still subscribe to the idea that bettering your body is a lifelong pursuit, not just a bunch of ranks you burn through and then you've earned your badge, so to speak.

Writing is another, but I imagine that may feel as empty to her as video games, as actually having your writing be "seen" (published, selling, talked about, etc) is very difficult.

Actually, I'll come back to video games for a minute, too. I also like to mod--as in, write extra quests and or change up the game mechanics of a pre-existing game. There are some massive mod projects out there (like Tamriel Rebuilt, cough cough) that accept the work of newbies and experts alike, and perhaps creating something for a thing she's loved for so long might catch her interest?
 

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I sometimes get this feeling as well. I take moments to readjust my thinking or thoughts
Often I find I am just fine, and if I had something important to do I do have time.

Useful or practical hobbies work for me. Even certain art which might look at as having no future is fulfilling spiritually, among other things.

I think art can be so open ended it seems uninviting. It's sort of like, learning something by ear and realizing you were kind of tone deaf and excel more actually as a visual learner or kinesthetic.

Cooking is a hobby of mine as well. But along with art, the approach I enjoyed was rather discovered after plenty of tinkering. I did not enjoy art til after becoming an adult though I still drew pictures in grade school. It was just not at the level it is now.

What am I saying? Lol. Hope that makes sense.
 
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No offense, but I've never understood boredom. Even if I did nothing with my life but read, I wouldn't be able to read even one third of all the great books in the world.
 

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Music is always great for INFJ's to dive right into. Guitar would probably be the best and easiest out of most instruments. I'd also say anything that allows her to work her creative side. Cooking, blogging, drawing, wood crafts, caligraphy.

My personal hobbies are drums, video games, and martial arts stuff (this helps with my Se side) Just give her a list of ideas and see which ones sparks her interests more. She's gonna have to choose something at some point. Maybe even reading books of her favorite genre?
 

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is it horrible if I don't have one?



(ummmmm__I will say 'breathing' then__in...out...in...out...)
 
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No offense, but I've never understood boredom. Even if I did nothing with my life but read, I wouldn't be able to read even one third of all the great books in the world.
Same.
I don't think I've ever really found the proper occasion to use the expression, "I'm bored".

(Or probably it's because whenever I'm idle, I simply daydream.)
 

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So my wife is an INFJ, and she is getting bored with life. She says she needs a hobby, and video games aren't fulfilling to her anymore (she feels like she's wasting her time with nothing to show for it). I've suggested drawing and painting, but she said that doesn't interest her. I also suggested knitting, crochet, and/or embroidering, but she wasn't interested in those either. I suggested gardening and writing, but those didn't interest her either. I suggested sewing, which she does enjoy, but she said it's too expensive for where we're at financially.

Do you guys have any hobbies that are relatively inexpensive? Please share your thoughts and ideas!
Work on convincing her that her time isn't wasted would probably help and some interest might develop out of it.

You could suggest that she join communities, online forums based on interests. Whatever she's interested in, if she finds a corresponding online community to engage it, it might enhance her excitement for doing it. That's something that works for me because there's that added element of sharing what I'm doing with others.

Then again, I might just be giving out suggestions that I know worked for my wifey when she was going through a bit of a "I'm bored and need something to do" phase a few months ago. I pushed her to come back to PerC. Then I pushed her to start playing Mafia and she seems to have gotten engaged with both. In fact, she's playing forum Mafia on two forums lol.

Might have created a monster :thinking:
 

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So my wife is an INFJ, and she is getting bored with life. She says she needs a hobby, and video games aren't fulfilling to her anymore (she feels like she's wasting her time with nothing to show for it). I've suggested drawing and painting, but she said that doesn't interest her. I also suggested knitting, crochet, and/or embroidering, but she wasn't interested in those either. I suggested gardening and writing, but those didn't interest her either. I suggested sewing, which she does enjoy, but she said it's too expensive for where we're at financially.

Do you guys have any hobbies that are relatively inexpensive? Please share your thoughts and ideas!
hmm, what about walking? does she exercise much? like any kind of body building/ training workouts. walking can be fun. walking in different settings can be fun. like at a beautiful park or in the city. or yoga, or aerobics to videos.. some of my hobbies - besides all the things you suggested which i actually do too - thrift store shopping/ going to flea markets (you never know what you might find and it's pretty cheap), like Marvin said, reading... there are many subjects-fiction, non-fiction. i like astrology and self-help books, fiction sometimes, currently reading about the kabbalah. i like to read tarot cards and runes for fun. learning the tarot i find hugely enjoyable and insightful, plus you can read for others too. posting on/engaging with internet forums - that's a fun hobby. i had a lot of fun on a website called Listia. it's a place where you can trade stuff with other people online. i got a lot of neat things that i think actually enriched my life in a trivial manner sort of. think she might like to sell stuff on ebay? can be frustrating but also can be fun and make a little money too. if she likes to sew, there are lots of books on how to restyle clothes out lately. like turn a boring t-shirt into something different. i like to make my some of my own beauty products, that can be fun. cooking from scratch - i have a great sourdough bread recipe she could have if she's interested. baking from scratch is so satisfying and very frugal. like homemade soft pretzels (you can freeze them), vegetable sushi..trying to recreate restaurant recipes can be fun too. usually kind of time consuming but you get to eat the yummy results. these are some things i do when i feel bored.
 

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Discussion Starter #17
You lost me at "relatively inexpensive", LOL.
For some reason, all my hobbies have come with an expensive price tag, most likely because I only enjoy things if I'm doing them the "right" way, which usually involves study materials and equipment.

There's my gardening, which involved a full DIY hydro kit out, because of course my tomatoes must be the BEST tomatoes ever, or else I may as well not try. I get really discouraged and uninterested if I think I may as well not try.
I live in Florida with overly hot summers for fruit production and terrible bugs, all the tomato plants I put outside die, and also I just can't summon up as much interest for them once they become "tainted" by nature's control over everything. Indoors I control the temperature, light, feeding, ect... and no icky bugs ever touch my fruit.

I really want to do Pizza making the "right way", with artisanal yeast cultures & flour and good tools... But nobody will buy me a full-on brick outdoor oven :crying:

I read a LOT, but even that costs money! :rolleyes:


One inexpensive way to pursue new hobbies is to join groups where people can share resources... but the efficacy of this depends on your particular INFJ. What's her enneagram / instinctual variant? Social types would have a better experience in groups.

Whether she goes a task alone homebody style like me, or is tolerant of everyone around her screwing things up as a social variant... In either case INFJs can benefit from a group effect.
In my case that's through internet groups.
I join something and get myself excited about it before I begin. Then research heavily to plan how I want to do it, as most hobbies have variations. Then I make an equipment list, gather my tools, and finally begin after setting myself up to succeed.
All INFJs hate failure more than the average person. By hate here I mean we take it personally. A lot of types can "hate" failure but embrace it in order to improve. We can learn to do that I guess but it's extremely uncomfortable, and progress is more incremental.
There's not much gain in trying to fight the perfectionist nature, but find ways to make it work for rather than against one.

For less studious hobbies, ones that can surprise us in fun is active ones.
Dance lessons could be ideal if you can go regularly as a couple and support her through her initial hangups.
My longest lasting hobby was horsemanship... just not doing it right now (my horse died), but there seem to be quite a few INFJs who love horses. It offers an opportunity to bond & try to harmonize with a peaceful sensitive animal, meanwhile including other people and physical exercise during fun activities. The quality of experience is is highly dependent on the particular facility though, so it requires careful choice.
Just some ideas. Tell us more about her and maybe we can guess something ideal.

She is a 9w1 on enneagram w/ an SP/SX instinctual variant stacking. I talked to her again last night and she said she wants to do sewing once we get a house and more income, so she'll have a space she can sew in. She just needs something cheap or free to do now until that goal can be realized. I have more hobbies than I have time for—I'll do just about anything artsy or craft-related. I cook too. She's just a lot pickier than me when it comes to hobbies I guess.
 

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Since she likes sewing, there are some projects that could be done cheaply and easily. I used to think I could save big money making my own clothes lol. But, it's actually cheaper just to buy the darn clothes after all the time and money spent on fabric, zippers, buttons, thread, grommets, etc. I've seen (and made) cozies for wine bottles (for instance). There are some people that sell them on consignment at local liquor stores, or they could be fun to make as Christmas gifts or some other occasions. There are lots of different fabrics that can be found on the clearance racks for much cheaper. Also, often you can sign up to get coupons through the mail from your local fabric stores. I used to get 50% off coupons all the time. She could always take a walk around a craft store and see if anything catches her eye. There's so many different things to do from making Christmas decorations to arranging fake flowers.

Recently, I was at the local farmer's market and saw homemade soaps for sale. They smelled sooo good. Once I have my plate a little clearer, I'd like to try something like that.

Another very cheap hobby could be putting puzzles together. I have my own "reading room" where I keep my keyboard, bookshelf, a cozy chair, and a card table for puzzling. Listening to soothing music, or the sound of rain outside while putting together a puzzle can be very relaxing.
 

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In our family we never had a lot of money because my mom was a single mom, but we played card games, scrabble, went canoeing or rafting down the river, macrame, danced to music, my mom found driftwood at the beach when we visited it and she used her oil paints and painted scenes on them. She painted well. The paint and brushes have an expense, but they last a long time before you have to buy paint again. With creative outlets there are a lot of possibilities. Also, there are hundreds of cards games that you can play alone or with one other, so the two of you could play together or even ask friends to come over and play too.
 
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