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Discussion Starter #1
Dear Fellow ENFPs,

Healthy ENFPs are confident and assertive, this doesn't happen overnight. I choose a career in sales and below are the lessons that have brought growth in truly being more confident, I am sharing this in hopes that it will help other fellow ENFPs get what they want the most out of life, to be the best version you can be. Please comment and share your own experiences as well. We can always grow together! Cheers.

*Lessons*
1. ACCEPTING that not everyone will like you, and that's okay.
2. Sugar-coating only delays and ignites the situation, because the truth always comes out.
3. You are 100% responsible for being happy in your life.
4. Doing things just because you "should"instead of focusing on the belief never works in the long run.
5. Be there and emotionally support yourself. You are the one person that knows everything you've been through.
6. Routine makes it easier to be spontaneous.
7. Say No. (Hard at first, but it becomes fun later.)
8. Exercise and a healthy diet sets you up for success.
9. Don't overthink things. Choose one route, life will tell you if it will work.
10. Don't trust everything you hear, validate the source of information.
11. Details make a huge difference, and when managed well, it will bring huge results.
12. If you approve of something, that is enough.
13. Conflict can strengthen relationships.
14. Define your values and make decisions based on them.
15. Making decisions on how you feel about something will simplify your life.
16. A new experience for an ENFP is actually an old experience with new insights. Tame that Ne with some Fi.

I will continue to grow the list as I come along new experiences.
:ninja:
 

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Keep your chin up, the sun always rises in the morning.
There's no need to be rebellious against anything and everything 24/7, most of the time, they were right.
You were never afraid of falling in love, you were afraid of having your heart broken.
Learn to take defeat with grace, and winning as mistakes, you learn more from the former.
Just because she hurt you, repeatedly, doesn't mean you should shut her out, it only makes the situation worse and makes her sad.
Talk less, you'll listen then.
Pursue your interests to the fullest, it's all a stepping stone on the path of self-discovery.
Learn when to put your foot down and say No, and not get strung around like a doll with a child.
Your apathy was your greatest weapon, and your wit your greatest shield.
Everyone question you've ever asked, even the odd spontaneous ones, has a question matching it, out there, somewhere.
Talk to your friends more, they could be gone tomorrow, you know what happened.
Even the people you despise have something you can take from.
Don't forgive some too quickly, but also don't put forgiveness as an impossibility, bridges can be rebuilt with stronger materials.

Discover time travel and read this list.
 

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Oh goodness. So many things.To give some context, I'm still pretty young, so the teenage drama is still fresh in my mind.


  • Hey. This is not the worst heartbreak you'll feel. The fact that it took you a year to get over that is kind of ridiculous.
  • You don't have to have people like you. Be yourself.
  • Love your family more. You're stuck with them, and you may miss out on these years if you keep fighting with them.
  • Just because he's basically the opposite of you, doesn't mean that your father doesn't *want* to understand you. Give him a chance.
  • Don't let people walk all over you. Just because you remember to ask the quiet person what they think, doesn't mean they will. Speak up when something is wrong.
  • Friendships end. Sometimes you just need to leave it that way.
  • Forgive and move on, because holding something against someone is exhausting.
  • It's okay to be honest, even when you think the people won't like you for it. But unless you want to permanently damage a relationship, try to be tactful about it.
  • Your intuition can be trusted, but only keep it in the back of your mind. Don't isolate people before you have evidence of wrongdoings.
  • It's okay to be depressed. Don't let your shame of being sad push people away. Believe it or not, they want to love and support you they way you do them.
  • YOU can brighten someone's life. You don't have to wait around for a supporter to support that person. YOU can do it. And you can be amazing at it.
  • Dedicate your life to the things you love. Even if they're small, or even objectively stupid. It's okay to do what you love. It's okay to be with the ones you love. You can never spend too much time on love.
  • Also. Get out of that customer service job. If you feel drained going to work, and depressed when you leave, I don't care how much you love your team. Your boss sucks. Apply for other positions.
 
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Discussion Starter #5
Oh goodness. So many things.To give some context, I'm still pretty young, so the teenage drama is still fresh in my mind.


  • It's okay to be honest, even when you think the people won't like you for it. But unless you want to permanently damage a relationship, try to be tactful about it.
  • Your intuition can be trusted, but only keep it in the back of your mind. Don't isolate people before you have evidence of wrongdoings.
  • It's okay to be depressed. Don't let your shame of being sad push people away. Believe it or not, they want to love and support you they way you do them.
  • YOU can brighten someone's life. You don't have to wait around for a supporter to support that person. YOU can do it. And you can be amazing at it.
I loved these two. Good luck on growing!
 
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Discussion Starter #6
In that case who are you?

Nah JK, It's nice reading things like this so thanks for the post

You're welcome. Way to go on applying knowledge!
 

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Guys I just want to say that I'm 16 and this was the biggest encouragement tonight, please keep adding to it.
 

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Nothing, I'd just look at myself, nod and say: "Fuck yeah..."
 

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you haven't done anything that i ended up regretting, so relax a bit. i wish my 50 year old self would feel at least half as proud as i am of you. good job, kid.
 
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  • Don't let others define your worth. You're awesome and you know it, you don't need others to tell you that because if you rely on them you'll let self-doubt stop you for getting what you deserve.
  • I know you're desperate to get away and be independent but don't forget you still have family who love you and miss you.
  • Clinging on to the past is the worst mistake you will ever make. Accept when you lose, it happens.
  • Even you can be the bad guy sometimes... I know, it sounds insane, be more aware and pause if someone points out your flaws.
  • Don't let the fear of the unknown govern you. The unknown is exciting, no matter how heartbreaking and painful it is... Keeping onto something that just doesn't give you happiness isn't living. Take that leap of faith.

(this is all very much still relevant...)
 

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*AlicetheFoodie's Lessons* Version 1.1

1. It's okay that people hate you.
2. Bluntness simplifies communication.
3. If you are unhappy only blame yourself.
4. Following imagined orders that are contrary to your beliefs leads to desaster.
5. You alone know the totality of your past emotions, so please help yourself.
6. Fulfil your duties before you play.
7. Don't serve others who pretend to be needy by saying 'Yes' far too often.
8. Be slim and healthy or face failure.
9. Take the first route that you find appealing and don't look back.
10. Don't base important decisions on rumours.
11. Details are important. Even if you don't want to hear that.
12. Trust your own judgement.
13. Conflicts can strengthen relationships. [unaltered]
14. Be aware of your 'values' and base your decisions on them.
15. If that doesn't work just follow your feelings.
16. Don't get too excited, there is nothing new under the sun. Hire an INTJ life coach. Tomorrow.
 

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When I was 6, I told myself that I should accept my mortality.

I was around 8 when I told myself to face my fears.

Around 13, I told myself not to conform to the fashionable rat race in a letter to myself.

Around 14, I told myself that the world is scared and leaderless. I wrote a poem to myself to let me know that I needed to put myself back into the world after being outcast.

I don't know what I could have told myself to have avoided all the emotional weirdness. Perhaps I could have sought ways to avoid emotional experiences.
 

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Discussion Starter #13
*AlicetheFoodie's Lessons* Version 1.1

16. Don't get too excited, there is nothing new under the sun. Hire an INTJ life coach. Tomorrow.
Haha Emphasis on the Tomorrow. :laughing:
 
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