[Berns321]

this guy....we met each other and liked each other immediately, and so we dated for a week, we both decide it doesn't feel right and call it quits. Then I leave for a week for my music and we don't talk, but when I'm back he says he misses me (and I missed him too) so we decide to give it another go and take things slowly. The day after I have to leave for my job again... and It's been a week now, but...he hasn't called, text, or tried to talk to me and see how I'm doing since I've been gone...and I don't know....maybe he is just not that into me??

this whole situation is just kinda wierd and started off wierd...=/

what is he thinking???....I wan't to ask
but I'm a coward...just want to know...is this typical ENFJ behavior??
and if so, what is the meaning behind it??

 

[JakeDK]

Stop being a coward and text him.. Just say "Hi I miss you, how are you doing? "

He will appreciate it. Last time he did it, now he expect you to do it. It is kind of your turn to show interest..

 

[Hycocritical truth teller]

lol you are maybe a bit passive here - you need to show it as well - just getting in peace with everything that comes won't get relationship anywhere. Show him you care as well...and also ask yourself - how much do you care and how much you can show...can't expect him to read from ya all the time

 

[Berns321]

true...I'm just so afraid to show affection or fall for this guy and get hurt =/

 

[JakeDK]

You have already fallen for him. You already seem a bit hurt. So.. Why not work it out? Do what should be done?

 

[Hycocritical truth teller]

true...I'm just so afraid to show affection or fall for this guy and get hurt =/

listen i know the feeling - i am very self-protecting myself. I'm also in a relationship with ENFJ momentarily and honestly i haven't been very expresive about my feelings and it made him feel insecure. But the truth is m- it will hurt to loose him anyway - you are just trying to handle possibel lose before it happens. I understand why you are doing it - but it worths taking a risk and not doing it. I am trying very hard to not be self protecting momentarily - but i want him to know i care.
One day you could be maybe sry for this...
Your situation tipically looks like you are acting like you don't give a damn and on purpose. Relationships don't end so easily. You miss him and he misses you - he cares for you, time for you to show you care as well - it won't go well if only one person shows affection. And he is trying to tell you - show me smth. My suggestion - show smth - cuz i think you do care for him - it can eb also a the beginning of smth wonderful - why not give it go?
It's not easy to open up...but it's worth trying to be more open and exposed with your feelings. Be brave about it - be honest to yourself about you feelings and respect yourself for them

 

[Berns321]

If you don't mind me asking. how was it like for you at the beginning of your relationship with your ENFJ?

 

[Hycocritical truth teller]

If you don't mind me asking. how was it like for you at the beginning of your relationship with your ENFJ?

idon't mind you asking - im glad to help - i just don't know what exactly to say and how to start
well it's hard to say - he was kinda more expressive then i was and it seemed like he was very interested - the truth is i was as much but i wasn't showing it so openly.
Then i hardly noticed how my feelings were strong for him...but when one issue happened with us i finally realized.
The beginning itself was in one word fun - we were getting along, we couldve talk for hours and he was kinda trying around me and it seemed that he was more into me then i am into him. But he is kinda drama queen - i am as well but not so openly.
I did liked the guy but this was a first time in my life someone was actually so open with me about what he likes about me and how he likes me and he kinda won me with that.
He did seem right to me but i was always self-protecting and kinda kept my distance then i noticed that to develope this relationship i have to start showing cuz all my self-protection made him feel insecure! But the truth is - he, mor ethen me, had his heart on a sleeve.
I don't know what more to tell you really - he is also self protective in a way - but not so much like i am - i could really hide it well.
But from this experience i really noticed there is no point in hiding - why really?

 

[Berns321]

I hope I can open up, before its too late. I do like him, and I want to be special for him. I know I don't so it much at all. And I think we have both have experiences of abandonment in the past. He is self-protective too... I just want things to unfold naturally, but I also don't want to put the relationship at stake for being to hesitant. It's also hard to let things grow between us when I go out of town every once in a while for my job...and although I wish we could talk on the phone or communicate somehow when I'm away, he isn't into texting at all. And when we talk on the phone, he seems to like it short and to the point...he likes face to face interaction more I think? So that makes things hard..=/

I just hope it all works out haha
I want it to
.....I WANT TO KNOW IF HE WANTS IT TO WORK AS WELL haha

 

[INFPPP]

For some reason I always have to take the lead at first with ENFJs. They're just not that into being vulnerable. ENFJs can be overwhelming confident when they're feelings aren't at stake though.

 

[E_N_T_P]

Tell him you wanna feed him. He's bound to get hungry, so he'll have no excuse.

 

[Berns321]

HE JUST CALLED ME!!!!!!!!
xD xD xD xD

I feel like I'm in highschool x)

he said "are you back yet???"
and I said "nooo I have a few more writing sessions..."
and he said "well, call me when you get back!"
and I said "OKAY" xD xD

and we talked about a few other things, conversation was short....but lively =)
I told him how when he talks it kind of sounds like Barney, and he said he would take is as a compliment only because I said it, haha

x)
maybe things will work out...i hope i hope

 

[Hycocritical truth teller]

Tell him you wanna feed him. He's bound to get hungry, so he'll have no excuse.

looool i almost died laughing when i read this ahahahhah gooood one man