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Ive read in previous posts (mostly by ppl who have recently broken up with an ISFP) about how there are those who dislike us. One reason that I can remember off the top of my head was claiming we were selfish.

But really I dont understand. I think ISFPs generally just try to please people and completely avoid conflicts with them. All I really want to do is make people happy....

So then how is it that some people could dislike us?

Anyone's opinion is welcome.
 

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I'm not really interested in making people happy. I don't want to hurt them, but I don't feel the need to go out of my way to please them. Wouldn't that trait be more Fe than Fi anyway?

I didn't know we were disliked! XD..maybe I'm oblivious. Jealousy, perhaps? Kidding. Maybe they dislike that Fi can sometimes cause unpleasant outbursts of emotion that can make people uncomfortable, or that we can be rather distant or detached from others. Not that it's true, but there is also a stereotype that ISFPs are kind of whimsical and flighty. I can see why others wouldn't like it because I don't like that trait myself, it's definitely one of my character flaws.
 

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Discussion Starter #3

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Whiny and annoying come to mind. Not to mention a lot of you are drama queens/kings >.>

I'm generalizing but I do find a great deal of you to match that profile....
Well that was blunt. I could see where you would think whiny considering we have many more personal/emotional help threads than, say, in your section. Is there something that makes us more whiny or annoying than the other F types though?
 

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Whiny and annoying come to mind. Not to mention a lot of you are drama queens/kings >.>

I'm generalizing but I do find a great deal of you to match that profile....
[email protected] drama king/queens. I think you are confused Thrifty.

Sometimes people try to self type other people and usually end up typing them wrong....... which leads to generalizations like Thrifty gracefully stated. If he knew a "great deal' of ISFP's he would know most are not drama king/queens.
 

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People dislike us? :shocked:
While I do agree a little with Thrifty about the whiny part, I really don't think we're drama kings/queens at all. We avoid all that jazz and watch from afar (or I do anyways). :p
 
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Because we are always on the verge to become predominately intuitive but we just tease with the line. Unmistakably present and simple looking, but our Xray FiNi glasses see through even the most hidden soul. All they have to do is one or teo gestures and the mode of your existence can come back in a frightenly accuracy. Often people do not like what they cant get wrapped around their minds, specially when it comes without notice. I have seen some unstable Fi wielders use this fo power for evil purposes, launching a mental assult to someone that might have injured out hypersensitivity; thus, we get branded with the asshole/bitch title.

I derive this hypothesis from my own interactions with people, and similar scenes I have observed from my self-proclaimed ISFP friend and Ex Girlfriend.
 

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Just going by the ones I know (including my father).

- Irresponsible
- Spineless
- Too wrapped up in own emotions to do anything else productive
- Unambitious
- Use 'artistry' as an excuse to bum around
- Insecure/Needy

These are the factors the ISFPs I've known commonly display which would cause me to DISLIKE them.
 

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Just going by the ones I know (including my father).

- Irresponsible
- Spineless
- Too wrapped up in own emotions to do anything else productive
- Unambitious
- Use 'artistry' as an excuse to bum around
- Insecure/Needy

These are the factors the ISFPs I've known commonly display which would cause me to DISLIKE them.
Oh I see... damn you're onto something here.
 

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I think Fi does indeed make people prone to selfishness, or maybe ego centrism is a better term. It wouldn't be unusual for an ISFP to put his/her own needs above those of others. Trouble making commitments, for example. While we value our independence and desire for freedom, other people need structure and security, that is something we cant always provide.
 

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This thread is a little nerving to me... You don't see many ISFPs bashing other types on this forum like that and Im sure it may have been a few... but to pick out traits that are positive and make them sound so negative because we are different is not fair!

I could sit here and think of many negative things I could say about other types but I choose not too, one because I am not negative and two I don't feel it's necessary to make a point!

I may not be liked by everyone in town, shoot I don't put myself out there like that to be like in the first place, but I am for dam sure we are the less dislike of the other types!

Like one said before we are tough cookies to figure out and we hate to be controlled, I enjoy being free and if you have a problem with that then I could careless... but we are genuine, we don't try to be something we are not, and we don't "go with the flow" just because thats the way "the world" thinks we should be!

Were not robots, puppets, or conformists and I am dam proud of that!
 

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This thread is a little nerving to me... You don't see many ISFPs bashing other types on this forum like that and Im sure it may have been a few... but to pick out traits that are positive and make them sound so negative because we are different is not fair!

I could sit here and think of many negative things I could say about other types but I choose not too, one because I am not negative and two I don't feel it's necessary to make a point!

I may not be liked by everyone in town, shoot I don't put myself out there like that to be like in the first place, but I am for dam sure we are the less dislike of the other types!

Like one said before we are tough cookies to figure out and we hate to be controlled, I enjoy being free and if you have a problem with that then I could careless... but we are genuine, we don't try to be something we are not, and we don't "go with the flow" just because thats the way "the world" thinks we should be!

Were not robots, puppets, or conformists and I am dam proud of that!
nicely said Gorjus :D
 

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This thread is a little nerving to me... You don't see many ISFPs bashing other types on this forum like that and Im sure it may have been a few... but to pick out traits that are positive and make them sound so negative because we are different is not fair!

I could sit here and think of many negative things I could say about other types but I choose not too, one because I am not negative and two I don't feel it's necessary to make a point!

I may not be liked by everyone in town, shoot I don't put myself out there like that to be like in the first place, but I am for dam sure we are the less dislike of the other types!

Like one said before we are tough cookies to figure out and we hate to be controlled, I enjoy being free and if you have a problem with that then I could careless... but we are genuine, we don't try to be something we are not, and we don't "go with the flow" just because thats the way "the world" thinks we should be!

Were not robots, puppets, or conformists and I am dam proud of that!
Well you guys posted this in your own forum soooo.......yeah.............

Anyways, to add on to my previous post, that was JUST the negatives. I'll admit I don't know as many ISFP's as that post may have led you to believe, actually, I don't think I know any in RL. But I could point out the negatives in anyone, you guys have a lot of good traits too. I hope no offense was taken :D
 

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Hmmm... well, it's important first of all to remember that the emotional health/maturity of an individual is more pivotal to how liked or disliked they are than their MBTI type. I think it's just that there are some personality traits of ISFPs that tend to manifest themselves in unhealthy specimens of the type, that can be particularly annoying.

Take my mother, for example. She is a case study in the unhealthy ISFP. I love her to bits, and she is my mom, but she is batshit nuts :confused: and some of her traits are shared by other unhealthy ISFPs. For instance

- she's incredibly flaky. There are several things I mean by this term, but to begin with she has not got a practical bone in her body. Organisation of any variety is an unwelcome obstacle to her plans, and she does not appreciate the necessity for planning anything.

- I think when people describe ISFPs as selfish, what they really mean is more... self-centred. there is a distinction, in my mind at least. It's not that my mother sets out to hurt people, but she doesn't really think of them, either, and this can be endlessly frustrating. The way she acts, speaks, etc is very much centred around her needs, her ego, with minimal consideration being given to others. Perfect example: she sees rules as "guidelines". She was in an arboreum recently and started cutting off branches, twigs etc from rare bushes/plants despite the big sign on the wall saying "NO CUTTINGS". She wants the cuttings, so she takes the cuttings. Never mind that the plants in question are rare, she is not an arborist and may harm the plants, they're incredibly expensive and you can't just TAKE them, and my poor dad was mortified. She wants it, she takes it. Simple as.

It was the same with my ex, who was also ISFP. Nicest, most harmless guy ever, but very much also wrapped up in himself. It just never *occurred* to him to really consider others the way it does to me. I do it every time I take a step, but for some reason... I dunno, it was like he lived in his own little him-centric universe.

- She (my mom) has no, and I mean NO sense of personal responsibility. If it doesn't feel good she just won't face it. She's interested in personal development/philosophy/therapy etc ONLY up to the point where she has to engage in critical personal assessment. If you tell her to love herself, be kind to the world, be one with nature, blah blah blah... she'll listen, but tell her she's being unfair/irrresponsible/nasty and she will just point blank refuse to engage.

I could go on, but i'm aware that my mother is a remarkably unhealthy example of an ISFP so to continue along this line would be unfair to the rest of you. On the upside, you can be incredibly gentle, good-natured people, and even my mum, I love very much. Those are just the particular shortcomings of your kind when the specimen is emotionally poorly developed.
 

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My mom and dad are both ISFPs and I dated an ISFP recently. I really appreciate them as people but I find them hard to spend a lot of time around. I am also Fi so I feel a kinship with ISFPs but then they do and think things that just don't make any sense to me.

They have to learn the hard way, even if they've already been warned about something. They don't seem to be able to understand that other people have their own lives going on. They get upset easily about being ignored or mistreated when really someone was just wrapped up in their own life. I think the drama queen/king comment is valid because it is how other types perceive you. You appear to make a big deal about little things. Sure, you dislike drama, but you are often perceiving it where others wouldn't.

Also, you guys say really bizarre things. I happen to love this about you, but I can see how it could make some people uncomfortable. Being unique always causes some people to write you off. But that can be a good thing. Weeds out the jerks.
 

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- she's incredibly flaky. There are several things I mean by this term, but to begin with she has not got a practical bone in her body. Organisation of any variety is an unwelcome obstacle to her plans, and she does not appreciate the necessity for planning anything.

- I think when people describe ISFPs as selfish, what they really mean is more... self-centred. there is a distinction, in my mind at least. It's not that my mother sets out to hurt people, but she doesn't really think of them, either, and this can be endlessly frustrating. The way she acts, speaks, etc is very much centred around her needs, her ego, with minimal consideration being given to others. Perfect example: she sees rules as "guidelines". She was in an arboreum recently and started cutting off branches, twigs etc from rare bushes/plants despite the big sign on the wall saying "NO CUTTINGS". She wants the cuttings, so she takes the cuttings. Never mind that the plants in question are rare, she is not an arborist and may harm the plants, they're incredibly expensive and you can't just TAKE them, and my poor dad was mortified. She wants it, she takes it. Simple as.

- She (my mom) has no, and I mean NO sense of personal responsibility. If it doesn't feel good she just won't face it. She's interested in personal development/philosophy/therapy etc ONLY up to the point where she has to engage in critical personal assessment. If you tell her to love herself, be kind to the world, be one with nature, blah blah blah... she'll listen, but tell her she's being unfair/irrresponsible/nasty and she will just point blank refuse to engage.
You just described my mother...

She even "seed rustles" where she take seed pods off of plants even in really inappropriate places like a strangers garden or the side of the highway where she stopped without consulting anyone else in the car.

And everything is someone else's fault. "Well mom, maybe you should have-" "Well maybe they shouldn't have violated my rights!"

Love her to death but I get so frustrated sometimes...
 

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You just described my mother...

She even "seed rustles" where she take seed pods off of plants even in really inappropriate places like a strangers garden or the side of the highway where she stopped without consulting anyone else in the car.

And everything is someone else's fault. "Well mom, maybe you should have-" "Well maybe they shouldn't have violated my rights!"

Love her to death but I get so frustrated sometimes...
Oh thank jeebus someone else gets this, especially the last part. Nothing is EVER my mother's fault, although in my case it's pretty extreme - i.e., if she hit you, it's because you provoked her.
 
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