Personality Cafe banner

1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
171 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Hey! I am genuinely curious of how Fe manifest in daily life and on the long term. I have a poor grasp of cognitive functions, and I think I learn better through actual examples rather than a website just telling me how it manifests.

SOOOOOOOO...IN SIMPLE TERMS>...What is the inner world of the ENFJ? Struggles? Strengths? How is life as an Fe dom' ENFJ?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,228 Posts
Holy shit a question about cognitive functions? Is this a trick?

Fe manifests itself in daily life for Fe doms by how we adapt and interact with the world. Essentially Extroverted Feeling is "object based values, beliefs, etc." and doesn't have anything to do with emotions contrary to popular belief. What this means is that while Fi users will scan their inner world for values, beliefs, etc. the Fe user scans the external environment (the world outside of themselves) for values, beliefs, etc.

To put it simply, Fe doms do not focus on the inner world because they was to actively engage with the outer world and their way of doing this is conforming to the established values, beliefs, etc. of the people around them. This is why when first meeting someone a Fe dom will "feel out" who they are around to make sure they do what is socially acceptable within that particular group. To clearly get my point across I will explain the cognitive paring of Fe and Ti. Basically Fe is like a liquid and Ti is like a cup. Liquid adjusts its shape to fit inside of any cup just like Fe adjusts their values, beliefs, etc. to match the people around them. This is why Fe doms get reputations of being so "friendly" or "social butterflies" because we accommodate to who we are around and be what they want us to be. However in doing that Fe doms don't have a shape. Ti is our inferior function. Ti is like a cup in that it retains it's shape and does not accommodate similar to how Ti has a consistent subjective logic regardless of who is around. You can't be both "very accommodating" and "hold consistent logic"

A common struggle for Fe doms is the "identity crisis" between trying to be who they are as an individual and living up to people's expectations of them. Since Fe doms have a poor grasp of Ti they will usually conform to what others want them to be. Which can be great if you have surround yourself around positive people however in reality that's not often the case. In search of acceptance we surround ourselves around negative people and jump through hoops trying to get their approval leading to Fe doms being exploited. Toxic people and/or groups are especially troublesome for Fe doms because without a proficiency in Ti to protect the them, the toxicity will spread. There is normally a "enough is enough" moment with people when you see a person is bad for you...but with Fe doms we often blame ourselves for not being good enough and let the toxicity spread even more.

If left unchecked the Fe dom will be tainted and start to become overly critical of themselves, others and the world around them. This is an eruption of inferior Ti and it is a stark contrast of how the Fe dom usually is so they will blame themselves for being so negative and people around them will notice commenting on it. Afterwards the Fe dom will want to hide their negativity from the world and try to isolate themselves from people and fall deeper into negative thoughts. It's a never ending cycle.

Life as an ENFJ is bittersweet. Unlike our Si aux cousins the ESFJ who have to experience something firsthand we can use Ni to get an idea about what an experience will be like without experiencing it firsthand. So for ENFJs we will intuitively pick up when we are being used by someone but sometimes Fe overrides what we want for the sake of the "group." MEaning we know something will likely not end well for us and we do it anyway which is like watching a train wreck in slow motion. Especially for Ni auxes it's a lonely life since you see you are connected to the "group" by very superficial circumstances. Meaning you hide a part of yourself (your intuitive nature) in order to "fit in." This however makes meeting another strong Ni an amazing experience when you start to see there are others like you, coming up with predictions that end up being true like you, can peer behind bullshit like you, etc. and you just "click." There is just this feeling like a complete stranger is your best friend and you literally don't know anything about them.

Does that answer your question(s)? Any other Fe doms wanna actually write something instead of just lurking? I know that being both an ENFJ and Enneagram Type 5 could mean my perception is skewed however I believe I'm, at the very least, "in the ballpark"
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
22 Posts
Holy shit a question about cognitive functions? Is this a trick?

... coming up with predictions that end up being true like you, can peer behind bullshit like you, etc.
Right? People always ask me, "what evidence do you have for that?" - The answer... NONE! but just wait and see.

That Fe/Ti axis is a muthafuka - My wife is an ISTP and yes, so much more rigid socially with Ti/Fe. It's much more difficult for her to "adjust" to the social needs around her. Instead it's more "fact" based. Physical needs yes, social needs not so much.

Fluid is a great way to describe Fe, which can appear (or be) very weak and shapeless in certain situations, but can bore a hole in a mountain or put out a fire. Fluid is weak in some ways, while extremely powerful in others.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,343 Posts
Interesting how ENTPs can also be chameleon like once we develop our Fe, makes sense now. Of course conforming is a deliberate choice for us, while most of the time we are off being black sheep, the opposite if ENFJs. Mind you as a 2w1 I’m much more attuned to others than a typical ENTP, for various reasons.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,228 Posts
Yeah must be nice having it be more of a choice instead of natural instinct. Maybe that is the relationship between the dominant Fe and Tertiary Fe. I would say I feel the same way about my Tertiary Se. Like I get where Se doms are coming from and I agree that it's WAY more fun but while Se seems like the way of life to them...I decide whether or not I wanna embrace it or not. I just choose to most times when I wanna get out of my head and have some fun!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
963 Posts
Their own personal world would vary depending on Enneagram type, among other things.

But since you asked about the stereotypical functions, I'll enlighten you.

Typically when involved with others, I'm almost always the first to reach out my hand and introduce myself and ask for their name. You could say it's the right thing to do, you could also say I have little patience.

When I'm out for my own sake, people like to come within proximity of me so I can speak to them. Some just start conversation outright. Likely others get a feeling that I'm in touch with the world around me, and intuition. It's all types of people from all walks of life.

Interactions with others is very honest, and directly to the point. Which is good as it cuts down on superficiality.

Strengths? Well, I can't say there really are any. I suppose a strength is that I have powerful, intense emotions. Which I do rather enjoy. It certainly makes for a good piece of artwork.

I understand them in others, and don't turn away from them.

One issue is when I'm alone I can tell people are trying to figure out what I'm thinking, what I'm doing, and whats going on. A result of being in tune with the outside world and all it's details. Which makes it feel like I have no time to myself, and that I have to address their needs first. It's actually easier to function in group settings, because the focus of others will be on the situation I'm in and that I'm there for, not me.

While the attention I receive is almost always entirely positive, there are times where I attract complete irrationality. Where seemingly a persons insecurities and fears are placed on me. Where people are put off by some sort of power they think I have.

On a personal, nearly hateful level, almost destructive.

I've been accused of nearly super villain levels of nonsense. Suspected of absurd things with absolutely zero evidence.

As a child I was constantly forced into positions of authority, ironically by the very authority figures I would get in trouble with. My teachers and friends mothers all thought I was rotting their children's minds. I know to degrees the former happened because of traits found desirable in a young male and being highly extroverted.

I have stories of being singled out of twenty other kids as teenager within thirty seconds of arriving at a place, and being held accountable for them without speaking a word or knowing what happened. And many other stories which would seem unbelievable if I told them.
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
Top