You know what annoys me greatly? Fear.
Someone took a magazine that I wanted at a hangout and I'm too -scared- to ask for it, or even - damn it - about it.
Why am I scared? I don't get it. What's he going to say or do that makes me so nervous? All I have to do is go up and go "hi, I noticed you have this magazine - are you reading it? If not, can I have it?".
But here's the thing: I have to wait for an answer and then respond accordingly and I can't do it. I don't trust myself to think on my feet, but yet I won't plan out all the possible answers that could be given.
I can think of 'no' or 'yes', and that's it. But I know it might not be a simple no/yes. If anyone gives me a response which means I have to make a spontaneous decision... wow, the thought scares me. I'd probably back off if it wasn't an instant yes. My voice will go high and I'll be all smiles (out of fear or something). I'd probably go 'oh never mind, thanks anyway' and leave.
And I hate that I would do that. I'll feel foolish. Why would I feel foolish? I'm not sure. Because I didn't get what I wanted? I was rejected. I take it... personally? As if, if I'd known how to ask I would've gotten it.
Paranoia? Social anxiety? Competitiveness? (with a stranger! for a magazine?).
Am I messed up? Does this sound like anything out of the Enneagram/MBTI?
Help!
Someone took a magazine that I wanted at a hangout and I'm too -scared- to ask for it, or even - damn it - about it.
Why am I scared? I don't get it. What's he going to say or do that makes me so nervous? All I have to do is go up and go "hi, I noticed you have this magazine - are you reading it? If not, can I have it?".
But here's the thing: I have to wait for an answer and then respond accordingly and I can't do it. I don't trust myself to think on my feet, but yet I won't plan out all the possible answers that could be given.
I can think of 'no' or 'yes', and that's it. But I know it might not be a simple no/yes. If anyone gives me a response which means I have to make a spontaneous decision... wow, the thought scares me. I'd probably back off if it wasn't an instant yes. My voice will go high and I'll be all smiles (out of fear or something). I'd probably go 'oh never mind, thanks anyway' and leave.
And I hate that I would do that. I'll feel foolish. Why would I feel foolish? I'm not sure. Because I didn't get what I wanted? I was rejected. I take it... personally? As if, if I'd known how to ask I would've gotten it.
Paranoia? Social anxiety? Competitiveness? (with a stranger! for a magazine?).
Am I messed up? Does this sound like anything out of the Enneagram/MBTI?
Help!