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What have been your positions in social groups over the years? How has this related to your type in particular, or the types of others?


When I started high school, I was a follower, but at the same time I did only what I wanted to do. My thought process would be, "oh, everyone's going to the football game? I'll be there" or "oh, everyone's going to the basketball game? I hate basketball. I think I'll stay home". This led to people feeling unsure of me. As high school progressed, I extended my group of friends to include people older than me, giving me instant status, which led to me becoming the right-hand man of the leader of my social group. One thing consistantly stayed the same in high school and even now: even if I was not the leader of a social group, I would instantly become the leader of any group projects, clubs, or teams, no questions asked.

Now that I'm in college, I've become a sort of a co-leader of my social group, but the tail end of the last paragraph remains true; I am always the leader of projects. I think that I think (makes sense, right? :tongue:) that social groups aren't important enough for me to lead fully, but anything related to school, work, or extracirriculars is.



How about you guys?
 

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i prefer co-leader or advisor roles. im not a follower, but i am comfortable following as long as there is a capable leader in the group. if the leader is not capable, or there is no leader present - i can drive the action. i drive the action as a function of being task-oriented, and a perfectionist. i have no use for power.

this fits my type (infj) i think. i have a strong j, and that seems to drive tasks, decisions, scheduling, etc. i have no innate desire to lead, but rather lead because im seen as responsible, caring, decisive, and independent.

leading and managing is similar to having confidence i think. fake it til you make it. pretend to be a leader, and people will start to follow you... and therefore, you become a real leader.
 

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I don't have a position because I don't view my friends or I as having them. I do tend to organize everyone though (like where we're meeting, when we're meeting, etc.) Otherwise, shit never happens.:happy:
 

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I am often pushed to take leadership roles whether I would like to or not. Throughout my life, I have been a class president, class vice president, event coordinator, team lead, group projects leader, websites' moderator, etc. People tend to want me to assume leadership roles. It must be my outgoing personality and the ability to bring people together (according to my superiors).
 

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I don't really belong to social groups per se. I have friends spread out among many different walks of life. I don't do the clique thing. So I can't really answer what position I'd be in.

If you were to ask me what role I play instead, I'd say the intelligent one who comes up with good ideas.
 

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Back when I was younger I was the 'ghost' of the group - never really noticed, but always a prescence.

Nowadays... Hmm, I guess I organise things and stop things from getting out of hand (most of the time :proud:). I don't usually lead, but if no one would do anything otherwise, I offer suggestions. I usually help organise things too... or things wouldn't happen, I don't think :laughing:

If there was a leader of our group, it would be my sister! :laughing:
 

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I have a few social groups, all non-connected. I'm never a leader, I don't care enough for anything to be one. This actually pissed quite a few people off, many of them told me that it bothers them that they always have to organize everything. Well, I like it when it's comfortable and I just have to go with the flow. My position is the groups is usually the nice-to-have-around one. I'm not conflicting, I always agree with the decision or I just don't make a fuss about them and I don't take much space. Now that I'm thinking, I'm an adorable person :laughing:
 

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Among many groups, especially consisting largely of Introverts, I somehow end up in the position of "Leader" or "Sage." I don't really like everyone looking to me, but I deal with it anyway if no one else will step up and if I am confident I can perform the role well. Among groups consisting mainly of Extroverts, I get to play the behind-the-scenes instrumental subtle guiding and connecting role I prefer.
 

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I usually begin as a quiet follower, not speaking up when in dis-agreement for the sake of self-preservation. As time goes on, I start following my own course or doing as I please and am more vocal about my individual thoughts and quirks. In the end (and at present in my workplace) I become an infamous figure of strange, randomness and eccentric quirks. I'm popular because of what I do and not who I am. I make people laugh with my dry humour, clumsiness and Ne outbursts. It's essentially how it's been since I was a small child, it's nice and all but a little change would dispel the illusion that history is repeating itself.
 

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I'm guessing the clown, storyteller, lets-do-something-fun person, tomboy, metal chick, the "artist" or the entertainer depending on who with.
 

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When I was a little kid I was always the leader, but now I'm either the wise quiet one or the crazy nutcase.

My favourite clique ever was in middle school, where I was second in command (yes, everyone remembers: there was a pecking order. Don't know how an INTP managed to gain a coveted social position; I can't say I've managed it since, but being best friends with the leader helped). It was great.:happy: All the fun and no work!:crazy: In general, I love being ontop and having no responsibilities and being loved by those of lesser rank - not resented, but also respected. The understanding mentor, the chill but whimsical and wacky guy everyone loves. You don't have to do anything...sure you're powerless, but also above the law. It's awesome!

In every clique, I've always been the guy that's suggested the "crazy ideas". Unless there's an Ne dom in the group, although even there they have to watch out.
 

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MOTM July 2010
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I don't like sticking myself in just one or two social groups because I don't like the feeling that those groups own me. I guess intimate emotional connection with people is not something that I crave. So I tend to move from one circle of friends to another circle, from elementary school friends to college friends, from ex colleagues to colleagues, from clients to private club members, some times a friend or a client introduce me to their social group and invite me over, etc.

Although I prefer superficial friendship level with them, I still maintain a good relationship with everyone, enough to make them likes me and always invite me every time their group have a meet up. But I'm actually not belong to any group.

So I'd say that although I have many social groups, I'm not a leader nor a follower in any group. I'm an independent social jumper.
 

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Subterranean Homesick Alien
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I don't really have a social group. I have had some in the past, though I was never really close with any of my 'friends'.
 

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Cafe Legend and MOTM Jan 2011
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I don't have a group of friends. The last group I had was the band I played with, and I was the strange, quiet, mysterious, shy, intellectual, creative, quirky, talented one (comparatively) that the two extroverted guys in the group were romantically obsessed with. I was a group-shifter, and was as well-liked by the extreme religious types as the drunken party stoner types. In the mountains, much less importance was placed on looks, or even intelligence, than was placed on survival skills and adaptability. I came across as an easygoing, tough-minded survivor type, the opposite of the much despised "city girl" stereotype that people made fun of there, despite the fact that I had just come from Portland. They had a disdain for prissy materialistic girls with their neatly manicured nails, artificially colored hair and an unwillingness to do hard physical labor. The fact that I wasn't afraid of bugs and didn't mind being seen at the general store in my dirty clothes after camping for a month without showering was something that counted in my favor there. They were all willing to forgive the fact that I wasn't into listening to country music, as long as I was willing to play the country song I wrote (entitled "I hate country music") whenever someone requested it at the little tavern. So, my role in that group, oddly enough, was to be the unattainable object of desire that everyone wanted to spend time with. It was quite a change from the way I was treated in my youth.

I should go back there some time. I don't have any friends right now, but it felt good to be loved by everyone.
 
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