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I feel very self-conscious in the street when I'm by myself because I can't feel how I come across.It's all in people's reactions which I can't pick up on since there are so many people around. I started to feel at some point that I don't even have an understandable blank face. Not even the infamous resting bitch face. I look at people a lot so as not to appear dead. When around people and trying to avoid looking at them I was asked if I'm ok so it is very rare that I am not engaged through eye contact with people around, even at the changing room. It's like I've only have a sense of self when I'm engaged with somebody and look them in the eyes. Even technical things, I seem to draw them out of people's eyes. I monitor their reactions for approval of the things I say. At work, when my mind is in my business and I can't pay attention to people's reaction to what I say I just shut up. It's not only about fear of judgement, but for fear of lack of control of social interaction. I can't perceive if I am consistent. If i show a different behaviour to someone than to someone else. If I start to repeat myself. If I said something a little offensive that I can't assess how well went down or not so as to make things up. I also start to shut up in groups the more I am involved in them for fear of people getting to know my mannerisms. One on one is better. If I see someone cracking a slight smile because they feel I'm fake or getting to know me, I change my tone right away.
I think many will say it's just social anxiety BUT it stems from something. It's like saying ENFP is just adhd or ISTJ is just OCD. I guess my underlying source of this behaviour is Fe, but I don't know how strong or weak. Well I'm a clear intuitive but which? ENFJ, INFJ or INTP? There's no way I'm an ENTP
 

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I feel very self-conscious in the street when I'm by myself because I can't feel how I come across.It's all in people's reactions which I can't pick up on since there are so many people around. I started to feel at some point that I don't even have an understandable blank face. Not even the infamous resting bitch face. I look at people a lot so as not to appear dead. When around people and trying to avoid looking at them I was asked if I'm ok so it is very rare that I am not engaged through eye contact with people around, even at the changing room. It's like I've only have a sense of self when I'm engaged with somebody and look them in the eyes. Even technical things, I seem to draw them out of people's eyes. I monitor their reactions for approval of the things I say. At work, when my mind is in my business and I can't pay attention to people's reaction to what I say I just shut up. It's not only about fear of judgement, but for fear of lack of control of social interaction. I can't perceive if I am consistent. If i show a different behaviour to someone than to someone else. If I start to repeat myself. If I said something a little offensive that I can't assess how well went down or not so as to make things up. I also start to shut up in groups the more I am involved in them for fear of people getting to know my mannerisms. One on one is better. If I see someone cracking a slight smile because they feel I'm fake or getting to know me, I change my tone right away.
I think many will say it's just social anxiety BUT it stems from something. It's like saying ENFP is just adhd or ISTJ is just OCD. I guess my underlying source of this behaviour is Fe, but I don't know how strong or weak. Well I'm a clear intuitive but which? ENFJ, INFJ or INTP? There's no way I'm an ENTP
Welcome to the complex, yet fascinating world of Typology!
You could have Fe in your stack...and maybe even be an introvert...I would say keep studying the functions and take a few tests... personality hacker is a good one ( many say it's one of the most accurate free online tests around)...
 

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I feel very self-conscious in the street when I'm by myself because I can't feel how I come across.It's all in people's reactions which I can't pick up on since there are so many people around. I started to feel at some point that I don't even have an understandable blank face. Not even the infamous resting bitch face. I look at people a lot so as not to appear dead. When around people and trying to avoid looking at them I was asked if I'm ok so it is very rare that I am not engaged through eye contact with people around, even at the changing room. It's like I've only have a sense of self when I'm engaged with somebody and look them in the eyes. Even technical things, I seem to draw them out of people's eyes. I monitor their reactions for approval of the things I say. At work, when my mind is in my business and I can't pay attention to people's reaction to what I say I just shut up. It's not only about fear of judgement, but for fear of lack of control of social interaction. I can't perceive if I am consistent. If i show a different behaviour to someone than to someone else. If I start to repeat myself. If I said something a little offensive that I can't assess how well went down or not so as to make things up. I also start to shut up in groups the more I am involved in them for fear of people getting to know my mannerisms. One on one is better. If I see someone cracking a slight smile because they feel I'm fake or getting to know me, I change my tone right away.
I think many will say it's just social anxiety BUT it stems from something. It's like saying ENFP is just adhd or ISTJ is just OCD. I guess my underlying source of this behaviour is Fe, but I don't know how strong or weak. Well I'm a clear intuitive but which? ENFJ, INFJ or INTP? There's no way I'm an ENTP
Huh, as far as I know, the fear of condemnation is common to the human experience. It may very well be social anxiety if it's this intense though. If you would like a comprehensive typing, we can help you if you were to post an answered questionnaire in the "What Type am I?" sub-forum. Should you also want your interactions to come off more naturally and comfortably, interact even more with people. Yes, the answer to many things that you can't do in life is to do them even more. Ironic, isn't it?
 

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Have there been periods in your life where you weren't self-monitoring as much?

Aside from being asked whats wrong... have any exchanges occured where you clearly did offend others, behaved so inconsistently as to greatly confuse others? Have you ever 'let go' of social control and if so, what happened? IF not, what do you think or feel like could happen?

I'm just trying to clarify if these concerns are rooted in negative past experiences, or more so something you are building up and hyper-focusing on..
 

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There probably are some type related things hiding in there somewhere, but I think that for the most part it's some kind of anxiety, would take getting to know you a lot deeper to be able to separate that anxiety from the rest of you and I think that if you keep thinking about it now you'll probably end up stuck in endless loops of "Is it inferior Fe? Could it be Fe with inferior Ti? Maybe it's actually an issue of Ne? Dominant or inferior?", as many people here tend to, the definitions and lines between different types are unclear enough as it is, you aren't gonna get very far.
Think it's better to learn and get a feel for functions and not focus it so much on specific thoughts and situations you have, it will start falling into place at some point, few people fit a type perfectly by the book, it's more about general undercurrent of person's thoughts and overall personality.
 
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