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I was thinking along the lines of 'if this thread was in a non-type-specific forum (like the Myers Briggs forum), it would give it more credibility than answering the question ourselves'.

I do have my own observations and suspicions of the answer, but I think it's more fun to have other people prove it for us. :wink:
INFJ here. I can only speak for myself. Personally, I don't think I'm attracted to INTJs (unless I've projected my idealised self or INTP on to them!). I joined the forum because I had a small crush on a guy I thought was an INTP. But it went so horribly wrong I came to PerC trying to find answers in the INTP forum - where I got lots of empathy (yes, that is what I mean!) and support, but no major lightbulb moments.

It was only when I came over to read the threads in the INTJ forum that lots of things started to make sense, and I was finally able to let go and resolve my feelings of confusion. Now I just hang around out of curiousity, and a desire to better understand Te so I am not unnecessarily hurt by it in the future. I know INTJs don't mean harm most of the time.

EDIT: I should add that I wouldn't rule out an INFJ-INTJ relationship. At the end of the day for me, it's more about the individual person - is the person kind hearted even if they are awkward, do we share the same values, are they sincere, and do they have integrity that I can respect?

Only generally speaking, there isn't an immediate attraction for me to INTJs.

Actually, thinking about it a little more. I'm not sure that there is a type I'm immediately attracted to. Even the idea of being attracted to an INTP was a one-off. If there is someone I don't understand, I always want to feel around somehow, and see if I can see the person's heart before I make a judgment. It may not be attraction so much as curiosity that makes me want to do this. I know. I'm a weirdo. But, basically, my post is probably meaningless for the purpose of this thread! Sorry folks.
 

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From my observations a lot of ENFPs seem to like INTJs.
 
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INFJ here. I can only speak for myself. Personally, I don't think I'm attracted to INTJs (unless I've projected my idealised self or INTP on to them!). I joined the forum because I had a small crush on a guy I thought was an INTP. But it went so horribly wrong I came to PerC trying to find answers in the INTP forum - where I got lots of empathy (yes, that is what I mean!) and support, but no major lightbulb moments.

It was only when I came over to read the threads in the INTJ forum that lots of things started to make sense, and I was finally able to let go and resolve my feelings of confusion. Now I just hang around out of curiousity, and a desire to better understand Te so I am not unnecessarily hurt by it in the future. I know INTJs don't mean harm most of the time.

EDIT: I should add that I wouldn't rule out an INFJ-INTJ relationship. At the end of the day for me, it's more about the individual person - is the person kind hearted even if they are awkward, do we share the same values, are they sincere, and do they have integrity that I can respect?

Only generally speaking, there isn't an immediate attraction for me to INTJs.

Actually, thinking about it a little more. I'm not sure that there is a type I'm immediately attracted to. Even the idea of being attracted to an INTP was a one-off. If there is someone I don't understand, I always want to feel around somehow, and see if I can see the person's heart before I make a judgment. It may not be attraction so much as curiosity that makes me want to do this. I know. I'm a weirdo. But, basically, my post is probably meaningless for the purpose of this thread! Sorry folks.
sounds to me like you don't rule it out. Considering you were able to communicate well with the INTJ.


now you just need to find one that shares the same values as you huh.
 

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There's only two possible answers to the OP's question:

1.) All types

2.) Masochists
 

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sounds to me like you don't rule it out. Considering you were able to communicate well with the INTJ.


now you just need to find one that shares the same values as you huh.
Alas, my communication with INTJ guy went 'horribly wrong' as I said. So I wouldn't purposely try finding an INTJ guy who shared the same values, I only wouldn't rule out a relationship with a guy simply because he was an INTJ. See the difference? :)
 

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Alas, my communication with INTJ guy went 'horribly wrong' as I said. So I wouldn't purposely try finding an INTJ guy who shared the same values, I only wouldn't rule out a relationship with a guy simply because he was an INTJ. See the difference? :)
what if the INTJ read romantic novels and went out of his way to understand that your heart bleed for a bigger picture. And he had a heart of gold, and the midas touch. lol

can you sense my sarcasm?

I think you quietly want one.
 

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I'm just starting to think, I can't imagine INTJ's are attractive to many S users, especially S doms, not only because of N-dominance but because any positive qualities INTJ's do have, we are not usually interested in "marketing" to society. While there is a "what you see is what you get" quality of Te, there is always a lot more going on internally than what Te is expressing. So I imagine those who are attracted to examination of multilayered personalities and ideas, and "digging" would be attracted to us. Not people who quickly develop a first impression based entirely on outward behavior.*

*It is interesting though, because personally I do develop quick first impressions and examine patterns in behavior quite a bit. It looks superficial to some (non-Te people, mostly), but that in itself goes much deeper as well. Since the impressions I form are not based directly on what I see but on some abstraction of it. I am not even sure how to do a completely direct interpretation of a person, e.g. based on what clothing they are wearing. It's not like, "that person is dressed nicely, they must care about their appearance" it's more like "Wonder where this person gets their clothes, how much effort they put into it, what kind of job do they have? Are they following trends or just going with what appeals to them? How frugal are they?" And if their clothes can get me thinking like that they seem like an interesting person. :laughing:
 

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@ninjahitsawall

Stop staying inside your mind! :tongue: Every one notice clothing, personality traits, tone of voice, body language... Sensors may even do a better job than us. They notice more details. We just notice the overall presentation because our mind is more abstract and only sees outlines and structures. This is why students all know who to ask about homework and who to gather around for jokes even when the class only started a week. :laughing:

I can type people in 5 minutes if I speak to them. I just ask directly 4 questions to determines E/I, N/S, T/F, and J/P. It is pretty easy if you read the basic definitions of these 4 dichotomies, and a couple of MBTI tests. 4 questions is all you need.

I briefly peeked your noble gas post. My idea is don't read too much literature writing specific to each MBTI type. These literature boost ego of each target MBTI type so they can market these articles to their target readers. This is also why each type has so much pride in themselves and constantly argue on PerC. There is no such thing as every one is uniformly produced under each MBTI type. There are huge variations if you do spend time observing individuals under each type. Do you read the study shows INTJs are 10% of Australian population? If you do read through all MBTI types statistics, there are 9 types less than 5%. Almost half of MBTI types can be considered rare. What makes you think INTJ is comparable to noble gases? Let's be objective so we can be better scientists. :happy:
 

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talking nerdy about math or programming is definitely a fast-track route to my heart @[email protected]
@NewMango

Not all INTJs are mathematicians. I am bad at high-level mathematics, and physics. I am good at chemistry, and biology which I can connect with real life experiences. Math is pure concept that I find boring. I like applied science better.

How come I got the impression you like the kinky sex from those 2 INTJs who totally don't relate to each other in any way from your descriptions? :laughing: Did they give out the same vibe talking about math? Your 1st INTJ wasn't even qualified as a relationship.
 

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Yes. INTJs can be quite attractive. I think the way it's done, each and every type will be attractive to at least one other type. So don't worry, somebody out there loves you. Even INTJ :p

But no really. We get on swimmingly because of shared Ni. Plus the inner emotional intensity is somewhat alluring. Makes us want to draw it out of you and we get a little buzz if we succeed. But we generally have to content ourselves with the nice little gestures you do, instead of expecting showy displays of affection. But that's ok. It's enough.
 

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@ninjahitsawall

Stop staying inside your mind! :tongue: Every one notice clothing, personality traits, tone of voice, body language... Sensors may even do a better job than us. They notice more details. We just notice the overall presentation because our mind is more abstract and only sees outlines and structures. This is why students all know who to ask about homework and who to gather around for jokes even when the class only started a week. :laughing:

I can type people in 5 minutes if I speak to them. I just ask directly 4 questions to determines E/I, N/S, T/F, and J/P. It is pretty easy if you read the basic definitions of these 4 dichotomies, and a couple of MBTI tests. 4 questions is all you need.

I briefly peeked your noble gas post. My idea is don't read too much literature writing specific to each MBTI type. These literature boost ego of each target MBTI type so they can market these articles to their target readers. This is also why each type has so much pride in themselves and constantly argue on PerC. There is no such thing as every one is uniformly produced under each MBTI type. There are huge variations if you do spend time observing individuals under each type. Do you read the study shows INTJs are 10% of Australian population? If you do read through all MBTI types statistics, there are 9 types less than 5%. Almost half of MBTI types can be considered rare. What makes you think INTJ is comparable to noble gases? Let's be objective so we can be better scientists. :happy:
What? The link I posted about noble gases had nothing to do with MBTI. It really came from a poetic type quote I found online several years ago. I dont remember how it was worded, but it was basically "If I was an element I'd be a noble gas." I thought it was a relateable analogy. Noble gases are inert and generally not interactive. But they are also prone to high reactivity if they are pushed (i.e. nuclear fusion). And they CAN bond but require higher amounts of energy to overcome their usual inert state, as suggested in the paragraph I posted.

I suppose you can make this analogy about almost any introvert. An INTP friend of mine also related to this. I think the I*F* types would be more like carbon or something. Lol. Or maybe one of those halides we like so much? I dont know, relate to whichever group of elements works best. :laughing:

Anyway it's not that we dont notice details, I just get the impression from some S users that if they arent irritated by N's they are at least confused. I read some of the threads, like the one on the ISTP forum recently. It is very different from being in an NF or NT forum. Maybe Im biased by my upbringing. I have one S parent and one N and they seem to miscommunicate and confuse each other so much, it amazes me how they managed to get married and have children. Lol.
 

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what if the INTJ read romantic novels and went out of his way to understand that your heart bleed for a bigger picture. And he had a heart of gold, and the midas touch. lol

can you sense my sarcasm?

I think you quietly want one.
Sorry. I wasn't sure if I got the joke... And, know I'm going to come across as inappropriately serious now, but I'm curious.

Actually, I don't read romantic novels. Or, not for the romance, normally. Should I assume INTJs are less likely to read romantic novels? I thought that INTJs did also want to see the bigger picture already as well at least, and can have a heart of gold? Not sure about the midas touch..
 

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Well I can't speak for every INTJ, but in my case no types are attracted - not even INTJ women.
In fact I have come to the conclusion that I'm incompatible with the female gender - not because there is anything wrong with women but because I simply cannot make them interested. I don't consider myself unattractive or a bad person: I just don't have any charisma in the eye of a woman. I'm not sad or complaining here - I'm past that part - I'm just stating the facts. I'm not very good with social codes, don't connect easily with strangers, am not very good with small talk and in most cases I prefer to be alone and just do my thing (which I get very focused and intense about). I rarely, if ever, take social initiatives and I have no desires to fit into or follow the male gender role of doing all the work that is "supposed" of men when it comes to romantic encounters or chases. The time-spent/reward-gained -ratio is simply too close to infinity to be interesting to me. The nail in the coffin was probably when I, little less than a year ago, completely screwed up what to me was an "ideal situation" with a female INFJ who I got close to. In retrospect I'm still having a hard time accepting that I'm so socially dyslectic as I am...
 
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