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Discussion Starter #1
I used to be very very very depressive, suicidal, pessimistic person and all around negative in general. Now I am the complete opposite, I am so happy with the life I lead. I have changed monumentally but I still hold some of the morals I had and can seem very inhumane and unfeeling towards people which is strange but hey that's others opinions, I think I am the best person I can/wish to be.:skeleton:

I've grown an appreciation for my life that I did not have previously, I think that has been my biggest personal change in my life so far. :heart:

What about you ?
 

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I was always extremely perfectionistic. I'd stress over the most insignificant details and sacrifice sleep and friends to make sure I got everything done perfectly. I’ve finally found balance by focusing on my auxillary Te, and taking emotion out of the situation, realizing I wasn’t letting anyone down by doing an average job of something, and realizing that all my extra efforts weren’t truly beneficial to my future, rather I was just hurting myself in the present for no future reward.
 

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So far I think for me it was when I was about 20... Some really bad things had happened over the course of the year prior to make me realize that I couldn't just lean on anyone and hope for the best, I had to take some control over my life and my future. It was mostly just baby steps in that direction after I realized as such, but I have never been the same since then. I don't consider it entirely positive or negative, really... It's just kind of something that happened. I went through something similar in my mid twenties too, but more in terms strictly of men... I had been in a toxic situation with a guy I really loved for years, but I finally realized just how codependent I was, and just what codependence is to begin with. That kind of thing really seriously defined my mid twenties, it was a challenging time for sure.

I feel I have been going through another change, just since last year ended, too... The past couple of years were so hard for me because reality sunk in then too, but in kind of a different way... Not so much like, "I can't lean on anyone, I have to take matters into my own hands" but more like "I have to be more responsible, it can't be just about me anymore," that kind of thing. I feel as though, for the past couple years, I've kind of been on autopilot, doing what I've had to do but feeling miserable about it, neglecting my own health a lot of the time either because I was becoming codependent or just plain miserable. But I think I am finally learning how to find that balance between doing what I need to do for my family and the people around me and to ultimately help other people, and caring for myself in the ways that I need to. I hope so anyway.
 

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I became the unhealthy version of an infj.

I really thought it was infp. But I'm gonna describe it:

I'm eager to please anybody, i don't have my own voice. I fear each of my actions are all wrong. I disassociated myself from anyone. I look fine but inside there's these voices - lies that tells me I'm ugly, I'm no good. I'm a loser.. I'm not enough. But i have to prove myself to everyone...

Damn it suck actually.. I think i became toxic there... I cannot say anything.. I'm no longer myself... It's like i always think very deep.. I feel so different and feel like noone understands me.. Yet I keep on getting the attention to males..

I lacked self confidence and self esteem.. I feel like all eyes are on me and i cannot do anything good... I'm so awkward all the time...

I feel like everyone would do something bad on me if i open myself.. I closed myself.. I held back.. I ignored and rejected all the social invites...

This is actually hell for me.

I have been in an unhealthy relationship too.. Where i.. Well, it's private

It was hell.

I experienced that for about two years

I'm glad I'm back

But i also learned that depression is not a joke
 

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I like flowers because they smell Nice and are lovely to look at.

So did Einstein. Im not saying me is Einstein... Or maybe.. Or maybe not.. Or maybe..

But i like Einstein material and in fact, i took responsibility by making space to others because they acted more Einstein than me and i thought they were being serious, but they just liked them selves more and thought they earned the space.

Today? ZERO inspirations from them, so why did they bother in the first place... They just wanted to make the world a terrible place to live because of the need to be heard.

Nice. Now i know what to give them. The same shit they gave me. An ugly voice, for instance. They do like it. Its weird, but they do. Let me see if they themselves got the ability to make shit into glitter. They crave it from me, duh.
 

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In the last 2 years, I went from being a student who couldn't care less about academics (because I could see through significant flaws within the educational system and teaching staff), and instead mainly spent time gaming or watching films. At this time, socially, I was doing ok, for me.

However, now I only seem to be focused on academics. It's funny because now I struggle to sleep at night if I don't think that I've completed enough work for that day. I'm also a perfectionist, which I believe I always have been, but it's more prominent now. In terms of socialising, I don't talk to people. Not at college anyways, the relatively small social life that I did have, I seem to have completely abandoned.

So, in summary, I've turned from an unmotivated, relaxed, student, who had at least one close friend, to a highly self absorbed, driven perfectionist, who is also a social recluse... At least I get to be top of the class academically :numbness:
 

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Discussion Starter #10
So far I think for me it was when I was about 20... Some really bad things had happened over the course of the year prior to make me realize that I couldn't just lean on anyone and hope for the best, I had to take some control over my life and my future. It was mostly just baby steps in that direction after I realized as such, but I have never been the same since then. I don't consider it entirely positive or negative, really... It's just kind of something that happened. I went through something similar in my mid twenties too, but more in terms strictly of men... I had been in a toxic situation with a guy I really loved for years, but I finally realized just how codependent I was, and just what codependence is to begin with. That kind of thing really seriously defined my mid twenties, it was a challenging time for sure.

I feel I have been going through another change, just since last year ended, too... The past couple of years were so hard for me because reality sunk in then too, but in kind of a different way... Not so much like, "I can't lean on anyone, I have to take matters into my own hands" but more like "I have to be more responsible, it can't be just about me anymore," that kind of thing. I feel as though, for the past couple years, I've kind of been on autopilot, doing what I've had to do but feeling miserable about it, neglecting my own health a lot of the time either because I was becoming codependent or just plain miserable. But I think I am finally learning how to find that balance between doing what I need to do for my family and the people around me and to ultimately help other people, and caring for myself in the ways that I need to. I hope so anyway.
Those are some great learning curves, and you came out all the better for them :heart: I'm happy for you ! all the best for the future to come :wink:
 

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Discussion Starter #11
I became the unhealthy version of an infj.

I really thought it was infp. But I'm gonna describe it:

I'm eager to please anybody, i don't have my own voice. I fear each of my actions are all wrong. I disassociated myself from anyone. I look fine but inside there's these voices - lies that tells me I'm ugly, I'm no good. I'm a loser.. I'm not enough. But i have to prove myself to everyone...

Damn it suck actually.. I think i became toxic there... I cannot say anything.. I'm no longer myself... It's like i always think very deep.. I feel so different and feel like noone understands me.. Yet I keep on getting the attention to males..

I lacked self confidence and self esteem.. I feel like all eyes are on me and i cannot do anything good... I'm so awkward all the time...

I feel like everyone would do something bad on me if i open myself.. I closed myself.. I held back.. I ignored and rejected all the social invites...

This is actually hell for me.

I have been in an unhealthy relationship too.. Where i.. Well, it's private

It was hell.

I experienced that for about two years

I'm glad I'm back

But i also learned that depression is not a joke
That's a hard thing to learn, I'm glad that you have made it through the tough times and can say you learned from the experience :heart:
 

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Discussion Starter #12
In the last 2 years, I went from being a student who couldn't care less about academics (because I could see through significant flaws within the educational system and teaching staff), and instead mainly spent time gaming or watching films. At this time, socially, I was doing ok, for me.

However, now I only seem to be focused on academics. It's funny because now I struggle to sleep at night if I don't think that I've completed enough work for that day. I'm also a perfectionist, which I believe I always have been, but it's more prominent now. In terms of socialising, I don't talk to people. Not at college anyways, the relatively small social life that I did have, I seem to have completely abandoned.

So, in summary, I've turned from an unmotivated, relaxed, student, who had at least one close friend, to a highly self absorbed, driven perfectionist, who is also a social recluse... At least I get to be top of the class academically :numbness:
Well you are what you will yourself to be ....
 

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My biggest change happened during the 'dark night of the soul' in 2015...
I was completely and terribly shattered...
Just lost interest in things i liked, questioned everything, land I just really lost myself...
I wanted to be away from everyone and just disappear..

Well, it made me see that I need a lot of self-improvement...

I used to belittle myself tremendously. Kick myself down when I made little mistakes...
Now I am more compassionate with myself and a little more open. I used to be afraid to talk to cashiers or strangers, since i have social anxiety and have been very sheltered in my childhood.
I don't talk to strangers when I'm in public, but I ask cashiers how they're doing and try to smile.
That's a plus. =)
 

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I didn't have one huge change, but several smaller ones which were of equal importance.

1) I used to be pretty outgoing in high school (not really an extrovert but you know), now I feel like I have social anxiety and I never reveal things about myself anymore.

2) I used to be an ISFP, now I'm definitely an INTP. It changed over the years.
 

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INTJ, 5w4, Ni-T type
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I cannot pick between the following two and it all depends on one's definition of "characteristic".

1. When I finally accepted that I needed medication to manage my depression/anxiety and insomnia. I became more myself than I have ever been and I was finally clear in the head. I had lived so many years in an extremely low-energy fog that the change must have been remarkable from outsiders.

2. I grew up a bit more than I anticipated when my dad died in 2015. Up until that point, I always knew someone else would take care of me if I messed up - or, like, apply the proverbial band aid to whatever scrapes I got into. But he died young (65) when I was 34 (My brother and sister were 29 and 24 respectively) and I realized that I really was alone. I mean, I always was very independent and reasonably responsible, but there was something inside of me that really grew up and it changed my perspective a great deal. It was like he passed the torch to me to be what he was for me to my children. I don't know if it was all that recognizable to those who knew me on the outside, but it greatly changed my inner world.

Me and my dad were extremely close, in case that wasn't apparent. He was human and had his flaws, but he was the one person I knew who loved me unconditionally and would help me out no matter what embarrassing thing I got into. He also saw me at my worse (during my depression) and understood me better than anyone else, too.
 

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Early school experiences left me depressed, suicidal, pessimistic and with a very low self-esteem. Bullied for 5+ years.
Never did anything crazy, but sure hated school.

Fast forward:
I took a few introduction courses to psychology to understand myself and my actions/emotions better.

This pretty much closed the deal for me, depression and most others solved.

Low self-esteem has been trembling the last few years due to intellectual successes I've had. But not quite broke down yet.
Until last year when I dated the cutest girl I ever saw. Then I realized my self-worth is by far higher then I ever knew.

I feel like a new man.
 
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