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when an INFP says i love you?

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i've been friends with this infp since i was a senior in hs and she was a Sophomore who was my best friend's girl friend. our friendship has gotten closer in the past 7 years even tho we've been thousands of miles apart now and again. i've now moved to texas and she had happened to be in the town im in to attend her grandparents anniversary. we hung out for 2 days after not seeing each other for a year eventho we talk every week and she brought up the idea of marriage after she finishes nursing school next year and she wanted to settle down with me..but the thing is.. i've always cared about her..flaws and all.. i love her and tell her that but shes never said it back eventho i know she..enjoys it and cares, she gives great hugs.. anyway..
shes been going thru some stuff lately health wise, relationship wise..( shes single, but people are spreading rumors about her) i guess average stress of someone in their mid 20's. we had a conversation.. i tried to help, she snapped at me and told me i didnt understand and to just leave her alone for today but said she loves me.. that's the first time i've ever heard her say that to me... i know she cares but when i try to tell her that she, her life and well being are important to me... she "clams up"
how long does it take an infp to realize that or acknowledge it. does it come easy to you? what do tho's words mean to you? i know every human is different.. i guess im just trying to look at things from different perspectives.
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I think that INFPs say "I love you" when they truly mean it from their whole heart. Otherwise it will sound too hollow and fake to us to say those words aloud.

How easy those words come up depends of the INFP. I'm rather easy about telling people I love them but I know there have been phases in my life when I've been unable to say those words to anyone.

I also sort of clam up when someone's saying particularly nice things about me because it's always at some level hard to understand why anyone really could like me and I feel like I don't deserve those compliments. She may also be reluctant to say "I love you" after you have claimed your love to her because she doesn't want it to give an impression that she's saying it only because you did.
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